The Abuse in a Violently Different Dimension
By VG Jekyll
Not BetaRead

33. If Only

If only, if only, the woodpecker sighs
The bark on the trees was as soft as the skies
As the wolf waits below, hungry and lonely
He cries to the moon, if only, if only

Harry was indeed late for his first class of the day, which was History of Magic, taught by Tobaeus Estwin. Harry had pondered over the thought if it would be better if he just skipped the whole class. It was however, of all the classes he had to follow, one most important to him right now.

And it turned out it was smart of him to go anyway, since, for today, the regular curriculum was ignored to discuss the recent Deatheater attacks that had occurred.

Harry was ushered into a chair almost gentile and received no reprimands at all for being late. Perhaps the teacher thought he and the others should be handled with care because of the previously mentioned attacks.

"-and, like Mister Fox just told us. People you might know have to deal with the attacks. Whether they experienced it, or know who did, or even lost friends or family to the hands of Evil. It is in this dire situation that we all rely on each others for support. So if you see your fellow student struggling, then don't hesitate to lend a listening ear or help them to a teacher."

Harry glanced around the classroom. Some students were nodding diligently along with the teacher's words, while others desperately tried to avoid the professor's gaze. Maybe they feared he would call on them.

Most students actually didn't seem really interested in what he was saying. Perhaps they couldn't care less about the attacks, that probably had happened far away from their homes. Or maybe didn't feel called al all to 'lend a listening ear to their fellow students', as the teacher was preaching.

Harry wondered how much the professor actually cared himself, since he and the other teachers apparently couldn't care less about what happened to Luna Lovegood. After a short glance around the docile classroom, he raised his hand. Professor Estwin raised startled his brows and then send Harry an encouraging smile

"Yes mister Potter? Do you have something to share with the class?"

"I've read in the newspapers that the last large attack by Death Eaters was at least four months ago. So why do you suppose there have now been two rather large and unexpected attacks?"

It was silent for a moment or two as the teacher and quite a lot of students stared baffled at him. It seemed like he also got the attention of those previously disinterested in the class.

'Good.'

"That is a rather interesting question," Professor Estwin replied, very obviously startled that Harry had been the one who came up with it. "Well, I suppose we can only guess as for the reason."

Harry wouldn't take that for an answer. "Okay, name a few."

Professor Estwin stared baffled at him. "Pardon. What do you mean?"

"Well, name a few reasons. Guess as for why it happened."

It was interesting enough another student who took Harry's bait. "I know that Chief Warlock Norrington was in Inverness during Christmas." He said and some of the boys friends started to nod agreeing.

This was the start of a long discussion. Professor Estwin could not get any order and Harry listened amused. Some idea's were rather far-fetched and mentioned more to be funny. Others could cut close to the real deal. The things Harry learned from this, he could not have read in any newspaper. It was also funny to notice that after class, he could still hear people talk about it.

Transfiguration was rather mundane compared to the previous class and Harry was only half-heartedly trying to turn a potted plant into an oil lamp. It would be easy, were it not that the task stated that it would have to be able to burn.

Harry wondered when in his life, he would need it. Wouldn't it be better if they learned how to turn it into a flash light and try to find something else than batteries to make it work on. Many things they learned at school he probably never would use in his life after Hogwarts. It was all too old fashioned.

Another class that stood out to him that day was Muggle Studies. In particular, because he got complimented for his use of the 'Muggle Law of Conservation of Energy' in his essay about Electricity. The professor gave him a strange look that Harry blamed on his counterpart's bad reputation. Maybe the professor thought that he'd paid someone to write it for him.

Nathan took him aside to ask him how he had known about that, since there was nothing written about in in their books. Truth was that Harry had simply overheard it some time ago in his own Dimension. Hermione had been trying to explain to Ron how a walkman worked and in particular why it couldn't work on magic.

There was an awkward moment after classes when Harry was in the Hufflepuff common rooms. He had been lounging on a chair, deep in thoughts of which he later would not remember anything of, and quite enjoying his alone time. All around him were his house mates and Harry couldn't help but chuckle as he realized he'd finally started to see Hufflepuff as his house.

He still missed the red of Gryffindor though.

It was when he heard someone call out Jay's name that he snapped out of his musing. He glanced around and saw how the guy in question was surrounded with people, like he always seemed to be. Harry had been avoiding him since school had started again, and Jay hadn't seemed to mind it much.

They locked gazes and Harry was the first to look away, trying to pretend he hadn't locked gazes with the guy.

He sighed deeply. He wasn't happy with the situation. He knew he had to talk with the guy., It was just hard to take the first step. And what could he say? What did he actually have to tell the guy? Would Jay believe him if he told the truth? Harry could hardly believe it himself, and it was happening to him!

"Harry Potter?' a voice called out to him and Harry glanced up to see a younger boy staring anxiously at him. The boy was standing near the small hallway that led outside of the common room.

"I think your brother is waiting outside," the kid muttered just loud enough for him to hear and Harry nodded at him to show he'd heard. He put his hands on the chair's arms to push himself up and out of it. He then stalked calmly over to the door and gave another nod to the boy.

"Thanks kid," he said and added a relaxed smile as it seemed like the kid was very tense. He was feeling content for a change, at it showed in his demeanour. The kid seemed to relax a bit too.

Little did he know that when he had stood up and crossed the common room, several eyes had followed him. Some people had realized that Harry could be more than they had thought him to be. Others because he had gotten interesting. The last were a few girls. Harry was blissfully ignorant.

The boy who had given him the message had also flushed and if Harry had seen it, he would have been reminded of the first time he had met his world's Colin Creevey.

Outside of the Hufflepuff dorms he found as expected, Jacob waiting for him. His younger brother seemed a bothered about something and Harry couldn't prevent a flutter of worry from coursing through his body. Apparently he did already have the older brother protectiveness.

"Hey Harry,' Jacob greeted him. "Can we talk?"

The boy seemed a bit hesitant, but determined at the same time. Harry gave a nod and wrapped an arm around the kid's shoulders the same way he had done so many times during the holidays. He and Jacob had become rather close and he was not to stop that just because they were at school again.

His kid brother didn't seem to mind it much either and Harry thought amused about what a change it was from the rude boy who had called him a skirt-chaser a few weeks ago.

"Is it serious?" He asked concerned as their feet led them towards the entrance hall.

His question seemed to startle Jacob, who flushed a slight red and Harry could actually feel the muscles in the boy's neck tense. "Um, you could say that, yeah," he muttered.

Now Harry was really concerned.

They walked towards the large oak doors and stepped outside. Immediately the cold wind seemed to attack them and Jacob clutched the front of his robes together to keep the cold out. They both hadn't thought to bring coats. Luckily enough, for once Harry used his brains and put a warming charm on both of them.

They walked over the crunching snow towards the empty Quidditch pitch.

"I wrote a letter to Sirius," Jacob confessed rather sudden. This caused Harry to halt in his step, his immediate attention on the other boy. He kept silent though and Jacob continued speaking. "And I got a reply this morning."

Harry was silent for a moment, but then he had to ask. "What did you write about?"

"You. And your nightmares." Jacob confessed. He send Harry a berating look. "And don't think I didn't notice. I even heard you cry out his name once!"

"You heard?" asked Harry, horrified that Lily and James might have heard too. But he was certain he always had placed silencing charms on his bed. Did he do them wrong? Was he that useless without Hermione's aid?

"Yeah." Jacob said. He buried his hands deep into his robe's pockets.

"I snuck into your room one night to see if you had taken my Heathcote Barbary card, since you always have complained about how you never had found his card with your choco frogs." He shrugged. "I didn't know you had a silencing charm on your bed, but I tried to wake you when I saw how you were moving around. When I got near your bed, I was almost deafened by your screams."

His tone was neutral, but Harry could see how a shudder ran down the boy's spine at the remembrance. He placed a hand on Jacob's shoulder, but didn't really know how he should react to the boy's admittance. Nor what the kid's real thoughts were about it.

"I'm sorry," he finally said and the boy shrugged again, non-committally.

They were silent again and continued walking to the pitch. Harry was glancing up at the sky and wondering if next time it snowed, he would try to fly. It would be beautiful with the snowflakes around him, but also a bit dangerous. He would need a good broom that could withstand the cold and also strong enough to handle the strong winds.

"You seem to hate Bellatrix Black," Jacob finally said. His eyes hadn't strayed from the white snow in front of his feet.

"Um, kinda."

"That weird, since we have never met her. She died before we were born," stated Jacob and Harry had no idea how he could safe himself from this awkward conversation. He didn't t have to.

"Anyway about the letter," Jacob continued. "Sirius and Remus replied that they hadn't expected to ever hear of us again and they they were very happy to hear from us. Not so happy about your nightmares though."

"What actually did you write about that?"

"Only that you seem to have nightmares in which he gets killed." He glanced at Harry. "That's what it sounded like: 'You killed Sirius, you bitch.' he quoted. 'Die Bellatrix!' Very violent and angry. It's not something for you to be so angry and angst."

Harry let out a shaky breath. He knew absolutely nothing to say to that. It seemed like Jacob was also close to finding out about him. He wished he was a better actor.

"He wants to meet us, you know. He and Remus," Jacob then said and finally looked him in the eyes. "Do you want to go next weekend?"

"It's not a Hogsmeade weekend."

"We can sneak out. Take our brooms to the Three Broomsticks and floo to him. I've done this before with a friend to go to a party in London." A proud smile appeared on his face. "We were never found out."

"You're quite sneaky."

"I guess I take after dad."

Harry wanted to meet Sirius really badly, but he was afraid of what he would find. How much different would this world's Sirius be from his own? Or maybe he would be too much like him. He certainly didn't want to get another reality check and have his memories of Sirius disturbed by a Sirius that was an arsehole.

But the desire to meet him was larger than his doubts. He agreed. Jacob seemed really relieved to have it off his chest and they decided to return to the castle. It was on the way back that a sudden thought occurred to Harry. He glanced at his brother as the idea started to form, then shrugged and decided he could always try.

'"Say Jacob, do you happen to know Luna Lovegood?"

"Hm? Loopy Luna?"

"Don't call her that!"

"Sorry!" Jacob said quickly at Harry's chiding tone.

"Would you do something for me?"

"It depends on what?" answered Jacob suspicious. Though the look on his face showed he was actually quite willing to do whatever his older brother asked him. Harry wondered what it was exactly that he had done to make his brother like him so much.

"Will you look out for her? She is my friend, but since she's in a year below me, I cant help her out much. You probably share some classes with her, right?"

"Uh yeah. Wait! You want me to befriend her?"

Harry sighed and rubbed his hands together. Even though, thanks to his charm, they were not cold. "I'm not going to force you to befriend people you don't want to. Just, it would be nice if you could step in if you noticed that people are taking this teasing too far. Or that you tell me at least, so I can try to do something about it."

"She's really your friend? But she's... she is just a bit strange, isn't she?"

"She is strange, without a doubt. But she is also a very caring, intelligent and overall a kind person. It's just that you don't know that side of her yet."

There was a short silence.

"Do you like her?" Jacob asked and leered gauging at him. Harry had to hide yet another exasperated sigh. Why did people always think that whatever he did had to do with sex or something similar? Had his counterpart been such a slut?

"As a friend, yes." He replied and Jacob seemed to accept that answer. The boy smiled at him.

"Ill do it. I have three classes with her and I know she's sitting alone in two of them. So I'll just switch seats. I doubt my friends will mind it much."

"Will you get into trouble over it?"

"Shrew the people who give me shit for who I want to sit with. If they do complain over such a small thing, they are not worth my time," was Jacobs thought on that.

Harry couldn't stop himself from giving the kid a tight, yet brotherly hug. "You know. Sometimes you're just too cute for your own good. It makes me sometimes wish I had known you before."

"Before? What do you mean?"

"Ah um, nothing. Lets go inside."

They continued walked to the castle, then Jacob suddenly said. "Hey, just curious, but what's up with Malfoy and you?"

"What do you mean?" Had Jacob noticed the Slytherin's strange behaviour? Or did Malfoy always behave like he did towards Harry?

"Well, he's been paying more attention to you lately. Do you know why?"

"No idea."

"Hm, maybe he found out you're awesome now."

"Wait. I'm awesome?"

"Yeah, but only since you grew a backbone," Jacob said cheekily.

Harry shrugged and then did something he'd always seen George and Fred do to Ron. He took Jacob in a headlock and gave him a noogie. The boy struggled insanely and shrieked like a banshee, making Harry laugh loudly.

It was nice to have someone to play around with like this. He'd missed this while growing up, though he had never realized it until he saw how everybody in the Weasley family behaved around each other. Though Ron always complained about this brothers rough housing, it showed how close and comfortable with each other they all were.

"Lemmego! I take it back! You're not awesome!" The kid yelled loudly and Harry noticed that there were tears streaming down his cheeks, even though the boy was laughing at the same time. He let go of him and found himself immediately in the snow. Jacob had pushed him down.

The boy laughed and kicked some looses snow at Harry who raised an arm to protect his face from the cold snow.

"You little-" He muttered and was quickly on his feet to chased the laughing boy back to the castle.

To Be Continued

[If Only – Fiction Plane]

VGJekyll: If you see mistakes in this chapter: point them out to me so I can correct 'em! NaNoWriMo went well. I 'won'.
Having participated in that really inspired me to write more.
I might continue that story and if I get good feedback from my friends, try to publish it in the old-fashioned way.
Oh and I'm still working on re-writing this story together with my current BetaReader DreamofStories.