Title: Father Knows Best
Rating: PG
Pairing/Character/s: Kenpachi, Yachiru
Word Count: 276
Warning/s: Um, kiddie violence? No spoilers, really.
Summary: Kenpachi teaches Yachiru a lesson.
Dedication: Kelly, because I could so see her as this type of child. Heh.
A/N: Because violence and youth are beautiful in Bleach.

“Ne…what’s the matter, Ken-chan?”

“Oi…Yachiru. I heard you’ve been makin’ a habit out of chewin’ on Ikkaku’s head.”

“Mmm hmm! It’s so bald and shiny!”

Kenpachi eyed her, coloring with her crayons on the floor, and not just outside the lines, but outside the paper too.

He sighed. “It really bugs him, ya know?”

“Yup!”

He crossed his arms. “You’re not teethin’ again or anything are ya?” He remembered that event a few years ago, and how not-pretty it had been with her chewing through people’s arms until he’d gotten her drunk enough to put her to bed.

“Hmmm, teething? Nope! Don’t think so!”

“Well, I just wanted to say… if you’re teethin’ again you probably don’t wanna chew on Madarame’s head for too long, cuz you’d chew through it and yeah, it’d be kinda funny, but it’d also be kinda gross, if you remember what happened last time,” he started, absently watching her draw what looked like the ones she called ‘Freaky Brows’ and ‘Tattoo-face’ running through a field of dead bodies hand-in-hand.

“Don’t worry, Ken-chan! I have all my old teeth still, see? Aaaah!”

“Well, good then.”

“Does that mean I can keep playing with baldie-head?”

“Yeah, I guess it’s okay then.”

“Okay!”

He frowned to himself, having momentarily forgotten what the original purpose of his life’s lesson to the little one had actually been. “Oi…Yachiru…”

“Hmmm?”

“Next time he whines like he did just now, really bite the idiot, okay?”

“Okay!”

He hadn’t raised her to do a half-assed job of things, after all.

END