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Tumbling Down – Part 1
Disclaimer: I do not own the song lyrics used in this or any other chapter. The characters are also the property of persons other than myself.
A/N: Prepare yourselves for hideous fluffiness and a bombardment of clichés. Okay? This was not an officially planned chapter I just felt inspired and I really like this song so…
Oh, smother the kiss
Or be drowned in blissful confusion
I swear that I could go on forever again
It was gone. All the pain, that had made Brian so desperate to escape, was gone. It had vanished the moment he set eyes upon Curt's face again.
Please let me know that my one bad day will end
He lay in a vegetative state, a warm body stretched out beside him, and watched the hands of the clock twitching around. A convenient patch of moonlight had illuminated them for him. Midnight seemed to crawl grudgingly closer, unwilling to remove him from the day he never thought he'd want to forget.
I will go down as your lover, your friend
He lay silently awake at Curt's side, thinking – probably more than was good for him. He knew he would never be the prize that Brian was, that Curt would never cherish him the way he did Brian. It didn't matter. It was all worth this one night when Curt had lost himself in his embrace.
Give me your lips and with one kiss we begin
But how could he make Curt forgive him? Maybe they could start all over again, as though nothing had ever happened between them at all? No. That wouldn't work. There were times, nights mainly, that Brian would not forget for anything in the World…
Are you afraid of being alone? 'Cause I am
He tightened his grip on Jack's shoulders a little. The Sun would rise and he knew he would miss the night's dream. He didn't want to think about what the World would ask of him tomorrow.
Are you afraid of leaving tonight?
He felt Curt's fingers press more desperately into his skin and he shifted a little closer. It's quite alright, my dear boy. I'm not going anywhere tonight.
I'll keep my eyes patiently focused on you
He would wait. He would force himself to wait. Already a part of his brain was craving another human body. But that would never win him Curt back. The enticing thoughts of instant gratification prodded him sharply as he wandered through the dark city.
Where are you now? I can hear footsteps. I'm dreaming
When Jack had finally fallen asleep, Curt felt the tears start to fall. Of course, he was grateful to Jack for not leaving him alone, for indulging his self-pity, but…oh God, he needed him. It made him sick to admit it to himself but he needed Brian. Sure, he was a git and he was insensitive and egotistical but… Jesus, Curt thought to himself, have I got it bad!
Keep me from waking to believe this
His last thoughts, as he drifted off, were for Curt. He didn't need Curt's body; there were hundreds of people in London who were just as willing to sleep with Jack Fairy. He didn't need his mind or indeed his soul, whatever the Hell that really meant. He was only there because Curt had needed him to be. No more, no less. Jack Fairy did not need Curt Wild.
Are you afraid of being alone?
The night streets, punctuated by music, laughter, drunken singing, were not as comforting as they had once been. He didn't want to be there but he had nowhere else to go.
I'm lost without you
A draft crept through the flat, making the hairs stand up on Curt's bare skin. Cold again. Where are you Brian?
