--

There isn’t a clock in the room, but that’s okay. Shinn knows it’s late, and would rather not think about it. He’s tired – there’s no denying that – but he can’t seem to let himself sleep.

His mind wanders; wanders to the girl sleeping on the bed beside him. Stellar’s breathing is painfully laboured, there are dark circles under her eyes, and she’s paler than he’s ever seen anyone before – and all he can do is watch. He’s without power. He can’t get her the drugs that would help to save her life; the drugs that only the Earth Alliance has possession of.

ZAFT officials, and Chairman Dullindal, want Stellar alive. But at this rate, it’s horribly obvious that Stellar isn't going to hang onto the thin thread. And even if they could figure out what was in her – what was keeping her alive, it would take them too long to reproduce the drugs effectively.

Stellar is out of time.

Shinn’s eyes are sliding closed; and he lets them stay shut. He’s tired, too tired to stay in the world of reality any longer. It doesn’t take him long to fall into the dark again.

--

In his dreams, Shinn remembers when he first saw Stellar. He remembers her dancing, remembers her feet butterfly-kissing the cliff’s edge in a careful tempo, remembers how carefree she seemed. How alive she was in sharp contrast to how she is now.

He remembers the lab too; the lab where Captain Gladys informed them all of the Earth Alliance’s “Extended” program. It was impossible – though in his dream, Shinn couldn’t distinguish the difference – to imagine the Stellar he saw dancing, to be the same Stellar who was used as a weapon.

As a murderer.

She’s too innocent, but the images of the lab won’t leave his mind. Stellar doesn’t look quite so pretty dancing now; with a red blade in one hand, and mutilated bodies at her feet.

But that’s who (what) she is – Shinn knows and he feels almost like retching – a weapon, a tool, something of the Earth Alliance. How many people had she murdered? All the mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, children... How many people…

The rest of Shinn’s night is spent in black.

--

Shinn’s not one to judge who’s deserving of forgiveness and who’s not. He isn’t God. But Stellar deserves forgiveness, he thinks. She deserves another chance at life. A new sheet of paper to start all over again, crisp and clean.

Stellar didn’t choose to be a killer. Stellar didn’t choose to be in this war. There’s still time for Stellar, but not for him.

Shinn knows the difference between someone who was forced to fight, to kill, and someone who wasn’t. He, Shinn, made the active choice to go through training. She, Stellar, did not.

His mind is made up. He slips out of his room, with one goal in mind.

Save Stellar.

--

Stellar is light, easy to cradle, as he pilots Impulse. He knows that both he and Rey will be up to their ears in shit when he gets back; knows, and he doesn’t care. Stellar will be safe, and that’s what matters to Shinn the most right now.

He makes the arrangements with the Earth Alliance commander to meet him at the set coordinates. He’s scared – never, ever trust your enemies – but determined nonetheless.

And although entrusting her safety to the very same people who put her in danger is a rather unpleasant thought, Shinn knows he has to either trust this faceless person, or let Stellar fade away.

It's far too late to save his innocence...

Stellar...

but it’s not too late for her.