I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue

This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right

Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse.

…..

Final goodbye

Buffy was ready to go. Everything was shipped off to England, she had left the letters in her apartment, except for Spike's she was going to leave it in his apartment some where so he would be the first one to find out she was gone.

She knocked on his apartment door to find no answer. The door was open so she quietly walked in. it was surprisingly tidy, apart from Ella's things stacked on the table. She glanced into the bedroom and saw Spike asleep on the bed; she smiled and quietly packed Ella's things in the travel bag.

She put the bag over her shoulder and placed the envelope on the table.

She walked into the bedroom and picked Ella up out of his arms, she was so careful not to wake him. Buffy slipped out of the room after.

Minutes later after Buffy had closed the door spike opened his eyes and noticed Ella was gone. He jumped off the bed and ran into the living room and noticed the letter on the table. He opened it and noticed Buffy's handwriting.

Spike,

I know you're not going to like this, but I've taken Giles up on his offer of going to England. I'm sorry I couldn't tell you in person. I don't think I could stand the look on your face, probably the look you have as you're reading this.

I wanted to tell you I love you. I guess I always have even when I didn't and wouldn't admit it to myself. And even when I did tell you down in the hell mouth you didn't believe me, but anyway, I say it again. I do love you.

I'm sorry for taking Ella away from you. Its just I want her to have a normal life and what kind of a life can she have here. With all the demons and apocalypses we all come across, it's no life for a baby.

I've gone to England because that's were I'm needed. My friends need me, not just the other slayers. I want Ella to grow up knowing she has people around her who love her.

I know you will probably try to find us, but I can't stand any more heart ache, I think its best for me to cut myself off from you completely. I have Ella to think about now; I can no longer be selfish. She needs me.

So I hope the last night with your daughter was a good one. I will tell her that her father was a good man and he loved her, I haven't really thought of what else to say her yet. But there is plenty of time for that.

So this is my last goodbye, please don't hate me. I'm trying to do what's right.

You will always be in my heart.

All my love, Buffy

Spike didn't have any words to say at that moment. He couldn't believe what was happening. All he knew was that he had to stop them from leaving.

Buffy was already in the lobby, she acted as normal as she walked towards the exit where a cab was waiting to take her to the airport.

Spike ran down two flights of stairs to the lobby. "Buffy!" he shouted as he saw her going towards the exit.

Buffy couldn't believe it; she wanted to leave quietly now this was never going to happen.

Buffy stopped and turned around, Spike walked up to her. Ella was still asleep in her arms.

"You can't just leave" he said.

"Well I can, and I am" Buffy said harshly. She didn't have time for this she was going to miss her flight. And she didn't want to stay here and argue with him all day, in the end he would probably persuade her to stay.

"What about her, she needs a dad" spike said.

"Well, I did ok without one." Buffy said.

"I have rights, you can't just take her back to the home country" spike said.

"You? Rights?" she laughed. "Spike you're a vampire, you don't have rights, and if this went to court I would win. So just let me go".

Spike grabbed her arm, "you said you loved me, in the letter, you said it" she said.

"Yes I know" Buffy said as she looked into his eyes. "But that doesn't change anything. I still have to go, Giles and everyone is expecting me. She deserves a good life"

Spike let go of her. "And you think I can't give her a good life".

"Spike you're a vampire" she repeated. "You can't exactly take her to the park on a warm summer day, or take her to school in the morning. You can't be like a normal dad".

This hurt spike, "so you think you can be a proper mum. You're not normal either Buffy, you're a slayer! It's not like you have a nine to five job." He said.

Buffy shrugged, "I have people I can count on. I'm sorry I've got to go"

"Buffy, I love you" he said.

"I love you to, but I still have to go" Buffy turned around.

"Will this make you happy?" spike asked.

"Probably not" Buffy said facing the door, "but it's what I have to do".

With that, Buffy walked out into the bright morning sunshine, leaving spike alone inside the building. He couldn't do anything. He couldn't go outside.

Buffy walked down the steps, tears in her eyes. The cab driver put her bag in the trunk of the car and she got in. She wiped the tears away from her eyes and looked at her daughter.

"Where to?" the cab driver asked.

"The airport please" she said.

She watched the building die out as she drove further and further away, finally she turned and looked to the road ahead of her.

Everything was going to be different.

The end

….

Ok that's the end finally. I hope you guys liked it.

My ideas changed so much throughout the fic, so many ideas so little time. But I hope you all like what I finally came up with. I know a few of you may be disappointed with the ending, none spuffy I know. But this was the easiest way, I feel, that if I wanted to do a sequel this would be the best way to be able to write one. If that makes any sense.

I want to thank every single reviewer. You guys gave me the urge to write more, not to give up like with everything else I do.

This was my very first fanfic and the response has been over whelming, my writing has improved throughout and im very happy with it.

I want to thank Maria and Holly specially, two of my best friends , thanks for helping me sort out all my ideas and im sorry for talking your ears off in English class. I know it's annoying. Thanks for reading it even though you don't have a clue about Buffy.

Emm yeah so I guess that's all, everyone who read it thanks a lot. Every one who didn't they missed out a lot. And I hope you read my other stories.

If I get enough response there may be a sequel, I have a few cool ideas. Hopefully it won't be as long as this one hehehe. Maybe a little more Spuffy as well, Spike and Buffy are meant to be together ! we all know it !

Thanks again. See ya, Hope xxxxx