Chapter 7: Naruto and Sasuke's Somewhat Sane Conversation

It started out like any other day, constant yelling, fighting and whatnot. Except today Neji and Gaara were gone, again, and Naruto hadn't gone for ramen. Mostly because Sasuke had tied him to a chair and forced the blonde to keep him company.

"Why did you have to tie me to a chair Suke?" asked Naruto, tugging at the rope.

"To make sure you didn't try and run away…" replied Sasuke in an oddly creepy tone. Naruto edged away from his currently crazy friend. Hopefully the younger Uchiha wouldn't turn into a deranged maniac or anything.

"Ne… Sasuke have you been getting enough sleep?" asked the blonde.

"….maybe…"

"Y'know it helps if you actually sleep."

"Well I can't with your incessant snoring! Haven't slept in two days… very sleep deprived. I was about ready to wear black eyeliner to hide the bags. But Gaara was the only one in the entire school who had any and he hid it from me… so now I go to school with bags under my eyes and people laughing at me."

"I snore?"

"Yes …. Very loudly… even Neji can hear you when it's quiet."

"Wow cool!"

"It is so not cool!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Is not and I can prove it!"

"Really?"

"No not really. I just wanted to stop the long line of 'is not' and 'is too's."

"That's a lame excuse."

"At least I won't die from too much sodium!"

"At least I don't have legions and legions of rabid fangirls!"

"At least I'm not blonde!"

"ARE YOU SAYING THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH US BLONDES?"

"YES I AM! Although it might just be you…"

"Oh I see how it is!"

"Good!"

"Fine! I'm leaving!" Naruto began to hop towards the doorway.

"The door's locked you idiot."

"I am not an idiot! Just mentally challenged…"

"You're an idiot suffering from down syndrome!"

"YOU'RE AN EGOTISTICAL JERK WHO DOESN'T CARE ABOUT OTHERS!"

They continued bickering and bickering until, lo and behold the door swung open, effectively knocking out Naruto and shutting Sasuke up.

"Goddamn you two are loud…" muttered Gaara from the doorway. Sasuke was still staring at the poor, knocked out blonde.

"We were sent here to give you this note Sasuke." Neji handed the black haired boy a red note. Sasuke quickly scanned it and his face turned grave. It read:

Sasuke Uchiha

Report to the Guidance Counselor's office immediately.

Sasuke groaned, what did he do now? The Uchiha child slowly got up and left the room. Neji and Gaara stared at his retreating back and then down to the unconscious blonde. Several slightly evil thoughts ran through Gaara's mind and Neji was busy trying to read his boyfriend's thoughts. The redhead finally decided on a plot and amazingly Neji said it was okay.

"Thank you Neji!" cried Gaara and hugged his boyfriend; then he ran off to find some ribbons, some pink hair dye and pink paint. Neji sighed; this was going to be something to take pictures of. The Hyuuga went to go grab his camera.

With Sasuke…

The black haired boy trudged along towards the main school building, dreading what was going to happen. Thanks to Kankuro the school now depended on him to keep watch on the four of them to make sure to report any problems. Of course Kankuro new better to report on Neji or Gaara considering last time they didn't go to their appointment and went to his dorm instead… that hadn't been a very pretty sight.

Now, more than ever, he wished his brother would kill Kankuro. He found himself standing in front of the Counselor's office and hesitantly he knocked. The door swung open and Itachi Uchiha glomped his unsuspecting brother.

"HA I win!" cried the older, what he won we may never know. Anyways, Mr. Iruka sat behind his desk and smiled at the two.

"Well now. I've been hearing that you've had a lot of problems lately. Care tell?"

Sasuke sighed, no way he was gonna get out of this. "Well let's see… Naruto snores to loud. I can't sleep at night. I'm deprived of rest. Gaara has been scaring the shit out of me when he hasn't done a single thing so far. Neji won't try and stop Gaara. Gaara wouldn't let me borrow his eyeliner to cover up the bags under my eyes. I've been hallucinating. Itachi has been glomping me. Kankuro's been videotaping me. That crazy art teacher is stalking me… I know it… DON'T TRY AND DENY IT!"

"Calm down Sasuke. Orochimaru-san is not stalking you… he's been devising up plots in his basement. Did you get ear plugs?"

"Yes… they don't work…"

Iruka sighed. This was going to be one of those longer sessions.

Back with Gaara and Neji

Gaara was in the process of tying bows into Naruto's, now pink, hair. He'd also proceeded to dye Naruto's clothing pink as well. Neji was taking pictures of his boyfriend's current mischief. Gaara was finally satisfied with the amount of ribbons in Naruto's hair and took some pink eyeliner out and lined the blue eyed boy's eyes. Then he took out the pink lipstick he had and applied that along with some other make up-y stuff.

"Too bad Naruto's ears aren't pierced…" mumbled Gaara. Neji smiled down at the redhead.

"We wouldn't want him waking up to soon would we?"

The younger sighed and replied, "I guess your right… again…"

Then he went back to adding finishing touches on his… er… masterpiece… I guess. Y'know a few sparkles, some glitter, jewelry, stuff like that. Gaara stood back and admired his work.

"…. I dunno. He doesn't look like a chick."

"…. I can't help you with that," remarked Neji.

"Eh, I can deal with that. One more photo and then we need to go get the balloons."

Neji's camera's shutter clicked one last time and they left to get Sasuke's 'special' surprise.

At the counselor's office

"And now I have the feeling that I'm gay and it's all Itachi's fault I tell you! And my pet goldfish in 3rd grade died because my dad 'accidentally' let it run away. But fish can't run away and then he got me a parakeet but while I was at summer camp the birdy flew away and this time dad blamed it on Itachi but Itachi didn't do it because if he did I woulda cried and in that point of time Itachi didn't like it when I cried so I knew it wasn't him so it must've been my dad who mentally scarred me for life by letting all of my pets 'run' away. Then there was this one time that my mom left me at the mall accidentally in kindergarten and it wasn't a very nice mall mind you but no one was with me and I started crying and then Itachi came and got me and then I didn't talk to my mom anymore and then my dad forced me to and I didn't like him anymore either so then the only person in my family that I likedish was Itachi but he's sitting right here now and then he went to this school and then mommy and daddy made me go here because they thought there was something mentally wrong with me like everyone else in this school and then I met Kisame and he scared me, because he has blue skin and all of that but then I met Gaara and Neji but I never guessed that one day they would be 'together' and it was weird but anyways-"

"Ok Sasuke you can go now…" said Iruka, trying his hardest not to shout and yell at the rambling boy in front of him. Sasuke left the counselor's office feeling as if his throat hurt a little too much. His brother had fallen asleep halfway through his ramblings, thank goodness. If Itachi had heard any of that, Sasuke probably would have been glomped to death and drowned in tears of joy.

Thus the black-haired boy walked away from the main building, assured that everything else would be decently okay. But due to his bad luck curse it wasn't his best day. A water balloon fell from the sky and plop! It landed on Sasuke's head covering him in pink paint. Everyone around him, which was quite a few people, began to laugh. Then three or four more fell from the sky and only one missed hitting Sasuke, it hit Kankuro instead. The poor black haired boy was drenched in pink paint and yet it was ridiculously funny to some people. Is it to you?

Well, trying to recover what little dignity he had, he made his way up to his dorm room and opened the door to the kitchen. He stared down at the knocked out/sleeping boy lying at his feet. Sasuke almost died laughing at Naruto. It was one of the happier perks of his day. The Uchiha grabbed his camera and took several pictures before going to his room to take a shower.

Of course, across the way, Gaara was snickering at the pictures they had taken of Sasuke as he got pelted with paint balloons. Neji was busy scanning and uploading them onto his website.

"That was great throwing Neji."

"And that was a great idea Gaara."