Disclaimer: Title based on song by Straylight Run. I am in no way affiliated with the band, or the wonderful George Lucas. George Lucas, King of the Star Wars Universe, owns all.

A/N: This is my first Star Wars fic, but I'm sure you all are probably going to be able to tell that in a bit. I am a huge sucker for Padmé/Anakin romance – and this is what this is going to be. I am also going to twist up the story a bit (oh, the wonderful privileges of fanfiction!), so beware.

This is Pre-Episode III, and also Pre-wedding in Episode II. So, they've already gone and told each other they love each other, but a no-no on the wedding scene and the beginning of the Clone Wars (they are still trying to prevent it, but the Wars are starting to already break out) in the movie. Anakin has already also been titled as a Jedi Knight. Got it? Okay. And, so, this is where my story begins…

Chapter One: "It's For the Best"

"Senator Amidala, I very much like the argument you brought up," said Senator Tootani as they walked down the dim hall. "You've opened my eyes to the crucial matters the Supreme Chancellor has tried to hide." Dome-like orbs colored an inky black gratefully stared back at her, mirroring her face.

"Thank you, Senator Tootani," she replied in the most mannerly way. She could hear the silk fabric of her lengthy dress sweep faintly against the smooth floor before hushed chatters originating from behind them shrouded the gentle sound. She looked ahead, feeling the exhaustion inside her that she had been attempting to hide over the past few days. "That was my intention. It is now clear to me that the leader of the Republic – though it is what we are supposed to be protecting and helping to stand firmly – has been keeping some things from us. It is only necessary that I make it known that I will not stand for such a thing."

"I agree," he said, bobbing his large, pasty head.

Padmé could see her droid, C-3PO, waiting beside one of the towering marble columns. She knew immediately that he had news for her.

"But who, or what, may I ask, has brought such light upon you? If I am not mistaken, your views before strongly differed from your points now. After all, it was during your term as Queen that Chancellor Palpatine was elected as Head of the Republic. In fact, there is an aura of tremendous political and perspective shifts glowing all around you. I am only curious as to what brought on this change."

"I can only say… an old friend," she smiled, stopping slowly in her step. "I'm afraid I now have some personal business to attend to," she informed him, motioning to her waiting golden robot. "Thank you very much, Senator Tootani."

"And you, Senator Amidala," he replied in the same regal fashion, slightly bowing her head as she did, before walking away in the other direction.

C-3PO appeared beside her as she walked on, his metallic body shining even in the much absence of light. The capital had always been a dimly lit place, and C-3PO constantly seemed a bit out of place when he came to fetch her these last few months. The bright glimmers coming from his way distracted some of the people. The droid helpers of her fellow senators were colored much more… well, dull and neutral, nowhere near the gleaming coat of her robot masterpiece, a personal gift from a friend, Anakin Skywalker.

Somehow, remembering the fact that the young Jedi had given it to her before he had left for the remainder of his training, she felt a slight pinch in her heart.

"I made some modifications to his system and wiring, not to mention abilities," he had told her, a charming, boyish grin on his face. "Just for you."

Apparently, he had wanted C-3PO to take care of her, along with R2 and her already very capable officers of security while he was gone. He had told her that it would give him better reassurance of her safety and that it would ease his worries about her and cause him fall asleep easier in the evenings.

Feeling her heart fall at her solemn thoughts, she looked away, sighing heavily, before her eyes trailed back to C-3PO.

"Senator, there's someone here to see you," he informed her as he walked with her. To her, it even seemed as if he was a bit excited. His eyes seemed to glow brighter than usual. Either that, or she really needed to consult one of her doctors and get a sleeping tonic. Her continuous lack of sleep was really toying with her vision these days.

"C-3PO, I'm afraid I'm not up for any more meetings today," she wearily told him, both her body and mind drained from today's activities. "I'm quite tired, if that's all right with you."

"Yes, but he insists on speaking with you. He says it's important," he persisted in his mechanical voice. "Milady, it's—"

"I'm sorry, I just—"

"You were brilliant out there, you know."

Padmé suddenly froze, the familiar yet haunting voice causing the distribution of the blood rushing through her veins to come to an abrupt halt. Her head jerked up to the direction of the brooding tone, a swarm of butterflies erupting from inside her stomach, instantly making her uneasy. Her heart stopped, mid-beat.

Her eyes met those of a young man – a Jedi. They were a sparkling blue, faintly glittering with delight and anticipation.

"Ani," she smiled widely, though surprised and a bit ill at ease. "What are you doing here? I thought you were training with Obi-Wan."

He headed towards her, his black robes flowing behind him and outlining his now-manly yet lean and tall form, as she noticed that his hair had grown longer, as well. His padawan braid was gone, for she had heard news of his initiation some weeks ago. His hard work with Obi-Wan had gained him rank of a Jedi Knight as the Republic was still teetering around the brink of the Clone Wars. The Jedi had sent him and his former master to a few planets to negotiate, to try to extend their hand out to them and invite them into the Republic, but it had mostly ended in… well, like Anakin had said before, "aggressive negotiations." It was apparent that the Trade Federation had gotten to them first.

While the controversy still surrounding the Clone Wars had kept him away, as well as his training, it felt odd to see him again after two months of no direct contact. And if the leap her heart had enacted was any indication of what she felt towards him, she knew that this day – were he to pursue their unfinished "business" – would not go as smoothly as she had hoped.

When he gradually came to a stop before her, she caught herself holding her breath, looking up into his steely eyes and slightly smiling lips. She hadn't remembered him to be so tall – he now towered over her. Or maybe it was just those two months of his absence that she had requested that was now playing tricks on her eyesight. Either way, she had a feeling that he was not the same person. Something had changed about him, something past his appearance or height. She could feel it around him. It was in the way he walked, the way he carried himself so surely, yet so… sinisterly. She was curious to find out just what was so distinct about him now that made a continuous ringing trill inside her ears and crackle down to her fingertips.

Dread clustered knots at the base of her abdomen.

"I just came by to check on you. Obi-Wan permitted my trip. And, if I am not mistaken, we also have a bit of unfinished business we still have to discuss."

She nodded as they started walking again, side-by-side. Anakin stood very closely to her – too closely – and she felt very uncomfortable at the fact that she could tell he was doing this on purpose.

"I heard about your initiation," she said, looking up at him with a proud grin on her face. "I am very proud of you, Anakin."

"Thank you," he smiled. "The day I was initiated, I felt as if the world had let out a big sigh of relief along with me."

Padmé laughed faintly.

"3PO, leave us," he said, and the golden droid nodded, robotically saying his temporary farewell, repeating to his creator how much of a pleasure it was to see him again. He then informed her that he would be waiting for her back at her flat, before waddling away.

"Has he been taking care of you?" he asked her as soon as they were alone, smiling.

"Yes, he has. I am very impressed with your skills, Knight Skywalker. He's been the most helpful, and not to mention he's been keeping R2 company. They're practically inseparable."

He joined along; his chuckles filling her ears, making her heart beat a little faster. "I'm glad. I wouldn't have it if he was just standing around and babbling non-stop."

Padmé smiled, thinking about how nice it was to talk to him again. It had been too long, indeed. But, considering their circumstances… it somehow felt different, now. She could almost feel his anxiousness radiating from his body, and it made tremors spread through her skin.

"How are things with Obi-Wan and the Council?" she asked, their pace perfect and not the least bit too stalling or haste. Although it was a relief to see him again, there was a squirming inside her heart that made her want to leave him with a sloppy excuse and hurry away in an effort to escape his company and try to cleanse her mind of him. She knew the question he was going to ask her and the reason he had come. Her two months of thinking was up – it was time for her decision. She was dreading that moment with every twisting nerve within of her body. "I've also heard about your training. They told me it's gotten more difficult in an effort to ready you to go off on your own – much more important – missions, alone. There is talk that the demand for Jedi Knights has been enormously increasing…. I remember you told me that these trials are just what you were waiting for, and that they would sustain you long enough before the higher trials of becoming a master."

"It is well," he answered briskly, but seriously. "It has gotten much harder and challenging, but it makes me all the more determined to prove myself to the Council that I'm ready to leave Obi-Wan, for it seems that even though I am now a Knight and no longer a padawan, they insist on making me his shadow through every mission. But, on the bright side, it's also making me stronger and fusing more energy into my connection with the Force."

"That's good," she commented. "I'm glad. And about your missions with your Master… don't worry, Ani. I'm sure it's only because they've seen how well you two fight together," she said. "Obi-Wan has been keeping me updated on your progress."

He raised a brow at her, intrigued. "Obi-Wan? He's been in touch with you?"

"Yes. I've asked him to."

"He never told me," he said, looking ahead, once again.

She could hear slight bitterness in his voice, and she wanted to ease the noticeable crease in between his brow because of what she thought to be annoyance, but she didn't know what she could say without giving herself away. She didn't want to bring his hopes up, not when she had already come to a decision that she knew he would undoubtedly despise. "I just wanted to see how you were doing," she explained.

"You could've just spoken to me yourself. My master likes to keep things from me, and I don't like it. I'm annoyed that you allowed him to."

"I didn't know he wasn't going to tell you." This was a lie, of course. One of the main reasons she had asked Obi-Wan to be the one to keep her updated was because he knew about Anakin's feelings – somewhat, at least – besides the fact that he was the one closest to him. She knew that he would keep it from him, and that was what she wanted. But she knew that if she told him that, it would make him even more resentful towards his master.

"Padmé, there's no use lying to me," he said, looking at her. "I can sense when you choose not to tell me the truth."

"I didn't want to get your hopes up."

He suddenly stopped, as she halted along with him. He quickly sidestepped, positioning himself front of her. Just as she had expected, he was now looking at her with wariness in his eyes, though his dimming orbs were now questioning her with an intensity that she was not surprised by. She knew that Anakin had always had the most intense and passionate gazes she had ever had the pleasure and, at times, unfortunate luck to become bewitched by.

"You didn't want to get my hopes up? What do you mean?"

"I just didn't want you to expect anything," she said as she walked past him towards the dark, hidden passageway to the gardens. "That's what I mean."

She heard his faint footsteps behind her as he ran to catch up with her, a fairly easy task, for his strides were much longer than hers.

"I know you know that the reason I've come is to know if you'd come upon a decision yet," he firmly said to her.

She sighed. "This isn't the right time or place for this, you know that."

"Why? You said that you needed time, and I gave you time. Plenty of time. Two months of time."

She looked at him. "We're going to head to the gardens," she told him, delaying her answer for the time being. "We'll have more privacy there."

He nodded almost barely, pursing his lips in an attempt to keep silent, although she could tell that he was indeed fighting to let out what he had kept bottled inside for months. He was going to be livid with her, she knew it. He had always had a temper, one that even Obi-Wan, his master, could not even learn to tame.

She stopped before a murky corridor closed off by a pitch-black door. She pressed her hand against a matted square camouflaged into the marble, a flashing underneath her fair palm and slim fingers before the door finally slid open. She headed inside with Anakin not one step behind.

Instantly they were met with a beautiful, radiant sight. The sun was pleasant this afternoon, peeking out from a wisp of cotton candy-like cloud, its rays just right. Their noses were pervaded with the fragrant blend of tropical flowers, a bloom of multicolored and blossoming roses, sunflowers, and a million other kinds of the flora variety graciously greeting their eyes. They kept walking until they spotted a white, smooth marble bench sitting in the midst of a ring of azure blossoms.

Padmé took a seat and motioned for Anakin to sit down beside her. Hesitantly, he did so.

"It's beautiful out here," she observed, looking around. "Imagine how it must be like during the spring. It must smell wonderful."

"Padmé," he said seriously.

Catching his tone, she turned her head and met his eyes, her pulse quickening at how dim they seemed to become. She sighed, looking down at the skirt of her dress. "Ani… what I said, back when…. I just don't know whether I should pursue those feelings," she mended. "I know I said that I—"

"Loved me," he finished for her, a dark look in his cerulean stare. "You said that you loved me."

"Yes," she nodded, her mouth feeling as if it had just been through the ritual of acupuncture and the needles had been left in. "That. I knew there was going to be a consequence for my reckless words. But, see, the thing is, I wasn't sure if we were going to survive."

The flash of hurt and anger that lit up in his eyes pricked a bruised, sore spot in her heart.

"So you said it because you didn't think you would live long enough to actually face me with those words," he said, almost harshly.

"No, Ani… Yes," she said, feeling a constricting feeling inside her throat. Along with the beating of her heart, there was now a cancerous tumor of pain throbbing inside along with its fast rhythm. "Yes. I'm so sorry. I only hope that you can forgive me one day, Anakin."

"But you love me, I know you do," he insisted. He took her hand, and she could feel a crushing inside the concave of her chest from the weight of his fierce gaze. "I know you wouldn't have told me a lie, even if you thought that that was the last day you were ever going to see me. You love me, Padmé, and senator or not, you're—"

"Anakin," she hastily said, cutting him off as she suddenly stood, her hand leaving his. She looked ahead, tears threatening to burn her eyes as she tried to swallow down the immense, aching stone jammed inside her throat. "Please don't make this any more difficult than it already is."

"Don't make what more difficult?" he asked her as he got to his feet and appeared in front of her, his eyes intently searching hers.

"We can't," she choked out, feeling a smoldering inside her that she wanted so badly to extinguish. "You know all this. We can't do this. We can't be together."

"And why not?" he demanded. "I love you, Padmé, I loved you ever since I laid eyes on you as a little boy in Tatooine. And you love me. What's there to stop us now?"

Her eyes darkened, refusing the urge to step back from what he had just said to her. A restricting, poisonous haze suddenly clouded her head, confusing her and causing the functions of her heart to work double-time.

He hadn't… not then…. He hadn't told her that he loved her. No, he hadn't. Maybe he had somehow implied it and she had just been too dense to catch it, or too worried, or frightened. However, she was positive he had just said that he had dreamt about her, that he had very strong feelings for her, but she hadn't ever thought that she would hear him say those three heartbreaking words. And now, she wished that she hadn't. It just made everything much, much worse.

"Everything," she callously answered, looking straight into his icy eyes. "Nothing's changed, can't you see? I'm still a senator, and you're a Jedi. It's wrong. We will be risking everything, everything we've worked for, everything good we've done in the past. They will shun us, Anakin."

"I don't care," he said, reaching out to her and tightly grasping her shoulders. His palms compressed her bare skin, causing a blaze of hot tingles run and scatter from his warm touch. "No one has to know about us. We can keep it a secret. They won't find out."

"I already told you that if we did so, we'd be living a lie. That still stands as steadfastly as it did before. And, you can't say that," she sternly told him, shaking her head, inwardly begging for him to just give up and walk away. Watching him fight for her with such ardor couldn't have hurt more than seeing him walk away without a fight. "You can't know that. It would be impossible to."

She looked down, bowing her head, as Anakin helplessly only watched her, swallowing down hard. The silver bands intricately weaved into her brown hair shone in the sunlight.

Padmé was fighting so hard to keep herself from crying. She had always been a strong girl, yes, determined and headstrong, but the painful collapsing of her world and everything inside her body was much too raw and agonizing to even attempt to ignore. She hated the words she was telling him – but it was the right thing to do. No matter how much she wanted to ignore all of the lines finely drawn out for her and her smitten Jedi, she knew she couldn't. They couldn't. It would only catch up to them at the most terrible moment, and before they knew it, everything would be torn from their hands. It was going to ruin them. She only wished that he could see that.

"Please, let go of me," she managed to say, despite the flame plaguing her mouth. Her lungs felt as if they were bound tightly with sharp, jagged and unbreakable chains.

Gradually, he did, but with great hesitation and hurt. As he drew back his arms, he merely watched her, and though he did register the restrain in her voice when she spoke and the fact that she was hiding her face from him, he refused to believe that she was hurt by this as much as he was. And, in some ways, it made him angry, bitter, more determined to pursue her and make her see the truth.

Finally, she looked up, and he could clearly see the brokenness inside her eyes.

"If you don't want to do this," he asked her, "then why do it? Why feel the pain if you can have another way when you won't have to?"

"It's for the best," she answered. "And I know that maybe you can't see that right now, but you will, Ani, you will."

Clenching his jaw, his eyes flickering down to his feet for a second, he looked up at her with a fire blazing deep inside his eyes. His fists were so tightly clenched that on his hand – the one that was still authentic – he could feel his nails digging into the flesh of his palm.

"I'm a Jedi, Padmé. I was trained to fight. I'm not going to give up on you."

"You can fight," she told him, wanting nothing but to hear him tell her that it was over, that he never wanted to see her again. Even if it would break her heart, she had a feeling that would be much easier. As busy and demanding as her schedule was, she would probably not even have to see him for another year or so without even trying. But she had known he would not back down; she recognized his defiant, feisty spirit. And, yes, she admired it most of the time, but there were times when she came to loathe his defiant nature. This was obviously one of those times.

"But you'll become weary over time. I'm only doing this because I'm looking out for the both of us… and… if the galaxy truly was fair… maybe we'd have married by now."

Her words punctured a hole through his heart. He was a Jedi, succeeding in things like swordsmanship and physical trials, but he had never actually passed the trials that required his feelings and emotions. He'd suffered loss before, and his temper had flared up so rapidly and uncontrollably that he had gone and done the worst thing a young padawan could do. He had, at the moment he had stabbed his lightsaber into an innocent wanderer, slashed his status and immeasurably marred the Jedi way. And that, he knew, was something he could never undo. But, now, as she stood before him with such certainty in her words… he was trying his best not to let his temper get the best of him. He was trying his best not to scream at her, grab her shoulders and shake her in an effort to try and make her understand just how much he needed her. It just amazed him how she could be such a respected, prestigious senator and be able to cower and hide behind her political, regal ways when it came to matters such as love.

"You're right. If the galaxy was even the least bit fair, you'd at least have enough courage to admit the truth," he brusquely snapped, his eyes narrowing as he glared at his surroundings. "I should have expected these things from you politicians. Always running away when it comes down to facing your own problems."

A scowl was suddenly formed on Padmé's face, her brows furrowed from the surprise and anger of his accusation.

"Excuse me, Anakin, but I don't think you have the right to bring my job into this matter, nor is it necessary," she replied sharply. "I already told you that I'm sorry, and I do care for you, very much, which is the sole reason I am doing this—"

"Are you certain? You care for me?"

"Yes!" she exclaimed, throwing up her hands in aggravation. He truly was going all out to make this very difficult and frustrating for her. "I am certain! I'm doing this because I care for you – and your future!"

"What good is a future if you can't be in it?" he suddenly cried.

She glowered at him, a look that he hadn't certainly seen in a very long time. He could see her hands clenched on the bell-like skirt of her dress, crinkling a fistful of its expensive, silky material.

"This discussion is over," she said to him through gritted teeth. "Good day, Anakin. It was a pleasure to see you again. And I do hope our future meetings will end on different terms." And then she stormed away; leaving him in the silent company of the fragrant, still flowers.

He watched her disappear past the secret doors, a grimace on his face. He let out a heavy, furious sigh as he sunk down to the bench when she was far gone, glaring at the bright petals all around him that seemed to be taunting him of the happiness he could be feeling right now if the former Queen of Naboo, the woman he had loved ever since he was a slave boy on Tatooine, had chosen to be with him.

It crushed him. He had actually expected her to run into his arms and shower him with kisses as soon as she laid her eyes on him, fool that he was. But then, seeing the look on her face when she first saw him, it had been obvious to him that his daydream was nowhere near coming true. It had been as if she had been… disappointed, dreading his arrival although they had planned this ahead of time. He had given her time. And she had taken it and thrown it back in his face.

He had tried to stop his dreams, and even became so desperate that he had privately consulted the great Master Yoda about it. His dreams – or now, considering the fact that she probably never wanted to see him again, nightmares – had persisted to drive him mad during his training. They were always of her, of her being happy with him, and once or twice, he had seen them… well, as husband and wife. And he couldn't deny that the dreams centered around that idea had brought him hope. His dreams had built him up, and now, with her political, imperial ways, had destroyed him by way of Senator Amidala, Jedi Heartbreaker.

It was as if she was solely determined on driving him away, and maybe she was, but he would not give her the pleasure of watching him throw up his hands and declare her the winner in this "war in love" scenario. Yes, this was war. He had been taught how to get what he wanted, hadn't he? And now, as the image of her smiling at him back in the lake country on Naboo flickered inside his mind and making his heart ache in a yearning, siren-like wail, he knew that it was certainly time he put that skill to use.

And as the sun set on Anakin, its blushing streaks and crimson bands painted across the rose-tinted sky, outlining the soon to be vibrant moons facing him, his expression, grim and resolute, did not change.

'I am a Jedi,' he repeated to himself. 'I am trained to fight – against anything. Even the wishes of certain senators.'