x Kissing a Fool x

On meeting days, Nanao liked to arrive early.

Very, very early.

Since it was not even dawn the hall was dark and eerily quiet; Nanao had found she could pace it for ages, losing herself in the much-needed solitude.

It was paradise, pure and simple.

"Nanao-chaaaan! Lovely, lovely Nanao-chan!"

Oh no. Don't. You. Dare.

Nanao closed her eyes, counting silently. It had been... five hundred and thirty one years, eighty-one days, seven hours, four minutes and twenty-three seconds of that.

"Ah, here you are! Why didn't you say something? I would have accompanied you - you know that the court is dangerous at this time of day. Whatever would I have done if anybody had harmed my Nanao-chan?"

Every. Day. And in public, too.

Even she had her limits.

And, since the previous evening, a plan as well.

Turning resolutely on her heels, Nanao frowned at her Captain's guileless face, opened her arms, and threw them around his neck.

"Take me," she bit out. "Take me now, Shunsui!"

She leaned back then, watching him with clinical interest; after all his reaction now would be critical to the continuation of her plan. To her frustration, Shunsui seemed to derive some perverse delight from disappointing her, because apart from a slight widening of his eyes and the fact that his jaw went slack for a moment, he remained remarkably unruffled.

Nanao forced herself not to fidget and stare languidly into his eyes instead. In theory she knew what languid meant, but she quickly found out that it felt like squinting, which always gave her a headache.

She hoped she would not have to keep it up for too long. Seriously, how could something so painful look attractive? Men were obviously more irrational than she'd thought.

A slow smile spread across Shunsui's blurred face. He looked, thought Nanao with misgivings, he looked-

... like a cat with a new toy.

"Really?" he chanted, as if in a daze. "Oooh, really? My Nanao-chan is finally going to give in to the everlasting fires of my love?"

His lips puckered, eyes closing theatrically. "A kiss then, Nanao-chan! To celebrate!"

Well. Again, he had to go and throw her off balance. The technicalites of sex were clear, but she had not expected kissing to be involved. It was an activity belonging to the courtship phase, so she was puzzled as to why he would demand it - since she had already stated her intention to copulate it seemed somehow frivolous to linger, wasteful of time and thus detrimental to reaching the final objective.

Frivolous.

Yes, he was it to him to go and muddle things, thought Nanao vengefully.

Still, to get results one often had to stay the course. Stick to one's zanpakutou. Hold the line.

With a sigh, Nanao used his neck as leverage to pull herself up, and pressed her slightly parted lips to his.

At first, nothing happened. There was only a slightly electric tingle caused by the soft, slightly damp pressure, which grew as she slowly, experimentally, moved her head a little, back and forth, exploring the differences in the textures of their lips. It tingled more, slight friction now joined by moist heat as his mouth parted a little, involuntarily.

Ah. Progress.

Faintly dizzy, Nanao pressed forward, intent on exploring more of this strange, shivery feeling, but Shunsui's hands closed around her waist, gently setting her down and away from his large body.

"Nanao-chan?" he inquired in a throaty rumble. "Are you quite all right?"

She looked up at him with unfocused eyes. Something seemed to be wrong with her glasses.

"Nanao?" he demanded suspiciously. "Did something happen?"

Nanao frowned. "Nothing happened," she said, pushing the slightly fogged spectacles up her nose with shaking fingers. "Whyever would you think something happened? Everything is perfectly normal."

"Not everything," said Shunsui, still eyeing her with suspicion. "I think it's safe to say that you are being distinctly abnormal, Nanao-chan. Are you sure you are feeling well?"

Oh. Nanao's back, already ramrod-straight, stretched a little more. Did that mean she was a bad kisser? Not that she knew what that should have to do with anything, least of all coupling, but if there was a thing Nanao could not bear, it was being less than perfect at an assigned task.

It was just not done. Nanao knew her duties, and being perfect was one of them.

Adjusting her glasses yet again she started towards Shunsui - and, when he took a wary step back, and another, and another, she (having adjusted her trajectory for escape parameters) simply leapt into his arms, slanting her mouth over his again.

Every job worth doing had to be done well, and that was that.

Shunsui did not react, apart from instinctively grabbing hold of her and taking another step back to maintain both their balance, but his hold freed her hands. Cupping his face, she nipped at his lower lip with her teeth and slipped her tongue into his mouth as he gave a low moan of surprise.

He tasted good, of peaches and her favourite green tea. Nanao squirmed closer, feeling faintly feverish.

She was dimly aware that this meant departing from the mission objective, since his moan had already indicated she had done her job better this time around, but it didn't matter. His lips were firm, one of his hands was steadily sliding up the curve of her back, heating her skin even through the cloth of her gi, and what had started as a way to teach him a lesson was suddenly metamorphosing into something that was just for her.

Just this once, she would indulge.

She would.

She so would, if only he would stop pulling at her hair.

But of course he had to ruin this too, just like he ruined everything else.

Tearing her mouth away from his she pulled back just enough to glower properly. "What now," she demanded.

Shunsui was breathing heavily, for once looking anything but bored. "What is the matter with you, Nanao-chan? And don't say nothing, because if you do, I just might-" he stopped, searching in vain for an appropriate threat, "-spank you!" he finally exclaimed, exasperated. "Yes, spank you."

Gently untangling his hand from her hair, he proceeded to rub the bridge of his nose while trying very hard to ignore the fact that Nanao's legs were still curled around his hips and, Kami help him, he liked them there.

Spank her? Wherever had that brilliant threat come from?

But of course he knew very well where, even though all those times when he'd pictured it, the roles had been reversed.

Nanao raised a supercilious eyebrow. "I'd like to see you try," she said.

Regrettably, most of the menace in her words was lost due to the fact that her usually perfect hairdo was obscuring one of her eyes in what Shunsui thought was an adorably lopsided way. And if that weren't enough her lips were pressed together in a sullen pout that had her fuller lower lip jutting out the tiniest bit.

His stomach clenched. This was turning into a headache even sake would not be able to cure. "Seriously, what do you want me to do?" he sighed.

Nanao's eyes narrowed. "You can stop being so flippant, for one," she said icily. "Stop saying things you don't mean, stop jumping me with that ridiculous kissy face. And put me down."

She squirmed, accidentally rubbing the juncture of his legs against his pelvis. Her lips were still moving, but all of a sudden Shunsui's senses had other fish to fry.

His eyes closed.

Tentatively, his hand tightened on her bottom.

Soft. Round. Resilient.

"Wha-?" he managed after a while, blinking.

"Put. Me. Down," she barked, smacking his chest.

He pulled his hands away so fast she nearly had no time to catch herself before she tumbled to the stone floor.

Straightening, she started to readjust her clothing with vicious little jerks. "So," she said, "do we have an agreement?"

Looking at her, Shunsui felt an uncharacteristic sullenness set in.

Perhaps he'd teased her too much. At the time he hadn't seen any other way than making a joke of his own feelings, bringing them out in the open so he could adorn them with red roses and make them look gaudy and insincere, a source of fun for them both, if not of happiness.

But she had never laughed, had she?

She'd frowned and huffed, looking stern, exasperated, and lately-

Tired.

How strange that he, who noticed every little thing about her, from the perpetually stubborn strand of hair at the back of her head to the way her glasses sat lower on her nose when she was happy and higher when she was tense or afraid, had not noticed that until now.

He'd made her tired of him.

Nanao cleared her throat. "Shun- Kyouraku-taichou?" she whispered. Her fury-fed bravado was already leeching away, leaving in its place the horrible feeling that this time, she had truly overstepped her bounds.

And still Shunsui was staring at the ground, eyes shadowed. Ignoring her.

Nanao forced herself to swallow past the sudden knot in her throat. "I didn't mean to- I just thought it would be better for us both if we put this silliness behind us, taichou," she insisted, almost desperately. "It has begun to interfere with my work. Besides, it's not as if you were truly-"

She swallowed.

"-truly committed," she finished in a rush. "So, do you think we can just stop this?" she asked, more gently this time. "Please," she added quietly.

Shunsui looked up at that, a wry smile on his face. "Certainly, Nanao-chan. Have I ever been able to refuse you anything?"

She bit her lip. "No," she murmured, suddenly horrified. "No. You haven't."

And he really hadn't and she hadn't seen it, too busy being annoyed with him, being perfect, and bitchy, and vexed-

She knew how grim his duties were most of the time. She was his Vice-Captain; she knew more than he thought. And yet here she was, selfishly begrudging him the one bit of brightness his day had to offer.

Shunsui grinned at her, but his eyes were sad.

"See?" he said, straightening. "If this is what you want, we have an agreement, just like that," he continued with a lopsided smile, stretching out his hand.

Nanao gave a guilty start.

It's not what I want.

She stood there, frozen, fists clenched at her side. It was time for an executive decision, she told herself.

It was a gamble - Captains were not exactly known for being transparent, so perhaps he did not mean it, the roses and the compliments and the way his eyes went soft when he looked at her and thought she didn't notice.

For all she knew, it might all have been an elaborate way of keeping himself from going mad under the pressure - Kami-sama knew the other Captains had stranger ways of dealing with it, first and foremost that dangerous nutcase Kenpachi - but if it wasn't, she just might spare herself a century of waiting.

As misguided as her initial plan been, she had created an opportunity.

It was now or never.

Since never was not an acceptable option, that left... now.

She took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, taichou," she said, lifting her head and stepping forward. "I was mistaken. Please forget what I said, or, failing that, take appropriate corrective measures."

"You are always so formal, Nanao-chan," he muttered as she slipped her arms around his waist and buried her face in the triangle of bare skin left uncovered by his gaping gi. "It's very cute."

The hair on his chest tickled her nose, so she rubbed her face against his skin to get rid of the itch.

"So," he sighed dramatically, closing his arms around her slim back. "I am reduced to human handkerchief."

Nanao sniffed.

"Oh, and Nanao-chan?"

"What?"

"I never say things I don't mean."

Nanao melted. Which was embarrassing, but at least they were alone and he was the only one who would see her lying as a large, gooey puddle at his feet. Her reputation would remain intact.

"I suppose-" she cleared her throat, "I suppose that should be all right, then," she said in her best prissy voice. "As long as you promise you won't tell anyone."

Shunsui pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. "Oh, there's no need for that, Nanao-chan."

He waved a dismissive hand at their surroundings, where even the aloof Kuchiki-taichou was loitering in front of the doors, attempting to look disinterested and failing miserably. Matsumoto had just stuck her head in to see what the fuss was about, and was now grinning broadly at the two of them.

"Why?" Nanao muttered into his chest, confused.

Ah, but she was so cute!

"Because I'd say roughly half of them already know," he said mildly. He gave a delighted laugh as she blushed and jumped - or rather attempted to, because he was not about to let her go.

As she glowered up at him, cheeks flaming, he took the opportunity and pressed a kiss to her nose.

"Really now, Nanao-chan, haven't I taught you anything? The only way to go down is in a blaze of glory!" he cried, bending his head to kiss her again.

Somewhere in the distance Matsumoto might have cheered and Ukitake might have given an amused cough. It did not matter to Nanao, because as always, her taichou was right.

She was kissing a fool, and it had all been worth it.