Author: DarknessesShadow PM
[discontnued]I'm bad at summaries, but here goes. Hiei is Harry Potter. How will he get along with Kurama Ron and Shiziru Hermione, let alone Mukro Snape. Rated T for language.Rated: Fiction T - English - Parody/Humor - Hiei - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,511 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 5 - Published: 07-21-05 - id: 2495285
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
NOTE:I know I called her Petunia Dursley last time, but that was because I wanted her to remain a surprise.
NOTE2:Heh heh I kinda messed up on a time-lapse. Thank you AmnarJoey for noticing.
Dark: So here's my second chapter...2 in one day..wow.
Dark: Eh heh heh... So anyways, I am not going to include anybody from the real Harry Potter series. The Dursleys resemble another family, even the son. I'm so sorry for the mother, considering her son. Yup, even You-know-Who will be someone else. I think you-know-who will be-
Kurama:(covers up Dark's mouth) Shhhhhhhhhh! Don't spoil the surprise for the readers!
Dark: Mmmmm hmmmm, mmmmm hmmmm, mhmmm mhh hm mh.
Kurama:(removes hand) What?
Dark: Okay, okay, just let me go.
Hiei: (sweat drop) On with the story...
Dark:(puppy dog eyes)
Hiei: This stupid girl knows...er owns nothing. Except her My Chemical Romance CD. Which we all know is avalible to the public.
Dark:Hey that wasn't-(cut off by story)
Chapter 2: The Vanishing Patience
Ten years after Hiei was left to the Dursleys
"Get yer butt over here, Hiei." Atsuko Dursley's voice rang through the house, shaking sawdust from the ceiling of Hiei's 'room', the small closet under the stairs. It was shorter than Hiei, who sported his 4'9'' proudly...but his hair made him almost 5'7''...all without gel, too. The wonders of Hiei's hair...
Anyway, Hiei got up to the relentless pounding of Atsuko's sake bottle on the door of the closet. he opened the door, only to have the crazy woman break the bottle on his head. Luckily, his hair acted as a shield and the glass bounded on to his...bed. Great. I'll have to remember to clean that up. Hiei added a mental note about the glass, then looked at the yet again drunk Atsuko. No wonder I didn't get soaked in sake. "Yes, oh wonderful guardian of mine?" Hiei sarcastically asked.
"Hiei,your brother and I have been waiting for you to MAKE BREAKFAST!"
"I will when I want to!"
"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!" Came a wheedling voice from the kitchen.
"Hiei, now or else I'll get another bottle and-"
"Okay okay seesh."Hiei went into the kitchen only to run into his 'brother'.
"Ow watch where you're going, runt."
"Just go make breakfast, or else."
"Ok, oh mighty Kuwabara." ((A/N:Yup, you weren't prepared for this XP thought it'd be yusuke, Ne?)) With that last sarcastic comment, Hiei grabbed a pan and started to make omlettes. A scruptious smell wafted through the house as Hiei added spices and flipped the egg a few times.
"Hurry up, shrimp."
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...call him short one more time...
"Hurry up with my omlette...shorty."
As if by magic((A/N: XD)), Hiei's temper grew. And grew. And went back up to Hiei's head and beat the crud out of Hiei's patience. Arrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh! Blasted fool! Want's his freakin' eggs, eh? It was official. His patience gone, Hiei flipped the omlette again, but this time harder, so it flew through the air into Kuwabara's hair. Sudden silence filled the room...then...
"Bout time, jeez. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm nof harf badgh, shorry." Kuwabara said,through mouthfuls of omlette.
later, around sunset
Atsuko and Kuwabara had their fill and then went off to watch some TV. Hiei had his one-egg omlette, compared to the Dursleys' combined 37-egg omlette.
"I wish 'dad' was still alive. He would have left more for me." Hiei sighed, and glared at the floor. Loud yells could be heard from the living room. Another sigh.
Hiei went outside and sat on the roof, looking out into the sunset. He enjoyed the way that the subtle blue tones, the tones of the ocean, of water,of blue-bells went to thepurpleshades, the color of violets and eyes, eyes he remembered since he was ababy, yet had nevermet, eyes he had despised yet was thankful to, and went to red. The color ofpower, of rage.Of blood and battles, and of love and emotions.Redhues gave way to orange, the color of life, a color so rich andpleasant,so tart, and yet so sweet,and then yellow, happiness, joy, bouncy summer days at the beach and endless happy children, all condensed into one color. And then the sun. Heat. Comfort.A warmth that could never be lookedupon, gazed upon,. but was still loved. The sun would then lazily sink downwards, into the darkness of the night. The quiet of the night. The stillness of the ni-
"HIEI-CHAN!" A blue-haired, pink-kimono-ed, violet-eyed young woman appeared on an oar, distracting Hiei from his quiet musings.
A shocked Hiei managed to squeeze out a simple,"...Hello?".
The girl looked at him oddly. Then a light bulb went off in her head. "Of course you wouldn't remember me. I'm Botan. I took you here when your parents...er passed. I knew them quite well."
In five seconds, Hiei had the girl in a headlock. Through clenched teeth he growled,"Why...here... why...not ... with... Mom's...brother?"
"Blame...George..."With those two words, Hiei let go of Botan and looke at her with a O.o expression on his face.
"Let's go downstairs. I have alot to tell Atsuko and Kuwabara."Botan said cheerily. Using her oar, she wacked a large hole in the celing and walked downstairs.
Hiei climbed down the hole with her, questioning both of their sanities.