|Without You I'm Nothing
Author: sakunade PM
Uchiha Sasuke doesn't know how to love. [SasuSaku]Rated: Fiction T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,572 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 07-30-05 - Published: 07-25-05 - id: 2501210
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
I feel you
He saw her.
He saw her wherever he went. She was in his thoughts and in his darkest dreams.
There was no way to take away this feeling he had inside. It's been so long since such a feeling was found deep within him. He remembers it as the feeling he had once for his mother and the feeling he once wished his father to give him.
A sense of love...
The Uchiha avenger had no time for love.
It was irrelevant to his cause.
He didn't need to love in order to deal with his ambition. To take care of what he had to do.
Why was he feeling the way he was?
Why was this feeling tearing him up inside?
It ate him away, slowly disarming him to the point of vulnerability.
Then it came to him that he was vulnerable to this feeling. Though he was no stranger to it, its presence was soothing. Though he withered in denial, he knew that this emotion was something that he couldn't hide forever. If he didn't do something, then it would harm his cause.
It would destroy him...and make him vulnerable.
He couldn't take that possibility. It would be devastating not only to himself, but to those around him. He knew the truth, but decided against it. When the time comes, he knew what he had to do.
Even if he had to surrender his whole being to the devil known as the snake sannin, then he would allow it. As long as his ambition had taken course and his brother was dead.
Yet, there was still another sense of emotion deep within him.
He regretted it all, because of how he made her feel.
She cried for him, denied herself of the freedoms of her village. She would deny all to be with him. He denied her gratitude, but left her with a thank you.
That was the only thing he could give her.
He couldn't give her a kiss, because he didn't know how to give off any sense of emotion. He was too numb to give a gentle kiss, or a hug. An embrace would have done suffice enough, but he was too cold inside. He was afraid to rub off his own essence into her. He was afraid of destroying her within. To Drug her, and leave her to wither for him begging for more.
As much as he denied it, the Uchiha avenger was making progress.
His heart was warming up, vulnerable to her love.
He glanced towards the door; eyes no longer peered towards the window. "What is it?" his voice showed no sense of emotion, as if he were numb. Each word that came from his lips came out as if they were their own facade.
"Orochimaru-sama seeks your presence…"
He moved back the bangs from across his face to the sides, flicking a piece of hair from his fingertip. "Figures…". Even though it was his own choice to come to the devil himself, Sasuke began to realize the ultimate truth of his deception. It was all a lie. It was the lie that Sasuke found himself believing, but denying within.
Kabuto glanced at him once he walked by, leaving the cold and darkness of his room.
This boy, he thought, would eventually destroy them all.
The power within his cursed seal cannot contain itself any longer he believed. Even though his thoughts betrayed his master, Sasuke-kun was the only sense of hope for those who wanted to be free from Orochimaru's iron grasp. Kabuto could only hope that there could be a way to contain the Uchiha avenger before it was too late.
His thoughts traced back to flashes of pink and magenta. All he saw in his thoughts were bright colours of the unknown. He thought that it was her presence, whenever he saw them. That she was thinking of him, and only him. He hated the way the colours would fly around his inner thoughts, forever clouding him with a sense of warmth instead of hatred.
The hatred and spite for his brother, was being replaced by unknown emotions and colours?
He hated how his mind would drift towards a dangerous zone whenever he left his room.
But then again, the more he stayed within the walls of his only home, the more he thought of her. He closed his eyes, before walking to the entrance of Orochimaru's confides where they trained, and where he learned many of the snake sannin's secrets.
Opening his eyes, he opened the door and met his master.
The devil himself who lured him to possess ultimate power, this was the man.
This was him, in the flesh and filled with blood.
He didn't hear his words, instead it all felt familiar. Almost as if they were her words, wishing him a happy return back to their village.
He had to do something before these emotions would eventually destroy him. Not only destroy, but corrupt him.
"Is something the manner?"
"No." He answered back almost brashly. "There's nothing wrong."
"So then, let's continue with our training Sasuke-kun."
Sasuke stood in position, waiting for the snake sannin to make his attack. His thoughts and memories of Konoha slipped, and his mind was set back to his goal and ambition. No more were his head filled with memories neither of the past nor of the present. No more was his mind set on her, and her feelings.
This is how Uchiha Sasuke lived.
The 15 year old Uchiha massacre survivor, the one who vowed to kill his own brother, lived in utter denial.