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Fate was something of a fickle mistress, one moment it showed you unlimited possibilities and the next the bh snatched them away from you! At least that was how it seemed to Walter Corey, butler and general man about Taplows who was suffering at the hands of fate or more to the point at the hand of fates many minions. Why else would circumstances evolve that kept him far from the side of his own lady love, the fair and rather too virtuous Flora Ryan, housekeeper and general tease of Taplows? After all no sooner had they both realised and admitted their mutual affection and attraction but they were descended on by all manner of visitors, all of whom seemed to find the company of either butler or housekeeper essential and so prevented the love struck pair from sneaking off for a quick fumble whenever it took their fancy, and it struck Walter’s fancy often!

But the butler was a man of resource and ingenuity and he was not the sort to be befuddled by mere circumstance! The perfect idea had to come to him whilst he was sequestered away in his pantry, trying his best to ignore the prattle of the visiting gentlemen staff by pretending to be engrossed in his book, a rather battered collection of Shakespearian plays and sonnets. At first he decided to crib a few lines from the bard and compose a short sonnet that would send the lovely Flora swooning into his arms but he quickly realised that not only did he not have the privacy required for such a composition but that there were no reasonable rhyming words for ‘lady luck’ that would not get him a slap.

So it was then that he had come across his brilliant idea, it was so ingenuous and yet so simple Walter couldn’t believe he had never thought of it before! Of course this may have had more to do with the several brandies that made such a daredevil idea now seem childishly simple. So with Shakespeare’s finest tucked under his arm, just for reference of course, and most of Romeo’s finest speech memorised the butler headed out for a quick stroll bidding the assembled gentlemen a firm goodnight.

Edging round the building Walter squinted in the moonlight, counting the windows in from the side until he was certain he had the right one. Then picking up a handful of grit and small pebbles he took aim and fired the first at his intended target. However when that failed to capture his beloved’s attention the impatient butler foolhardily seized a larger pebble and let it fly. The telltale crack of glass was enough to bring even him out of his alcohol-fuelled foolishness so when the window was flung open the butler dived into the waiting shadows. Not a moment too soon as instead of his beloved’s fair face gazing down at him he was presented instead with the rather disturbing image of Mrs Diggins bed capped and red-faced, hurling down abuse at whatever scallywag had disturbed her rest.

Shocked at such language coming from a lady it took a few moments after Mrs Diggins had retreated back indoors for him to realise and then he was forced to revise his plan. Realising that any further pebble throwing might alert Mrs Diggins Walter decided on a slight change of plan and he eyed up the ivy speculatively. Giving it a good tug the butler decided to chance it and so after a few false starts he managed to climb his way up to his paramour's window. Squinting in through the window he scanned the room for any sign of Flora, surprised when he caught sight of her back as she stood by the door clearly caught up in conversation with someone.

Gritting his teeth the butler waited impatiently for the door to close, the longer he waited the more he realised how precarious his position was. The wind was whistling around places he was sure had never been so airated, and he could have sworn it was much colder up here then down on the ground and was that a touch of rain? Tightening his grip on Flora's window ledge he tapped gently on the window pane, hoping his efforts would only attract her attention and not that of her guest. It seemed to be doing the job as Flora twitched slightly in the direction of the noise bidding her visitor a good night before heading over to him.

Smiling brightly despite the fact he was suspended thirty feet from the ground, secured by only a windowsill and the goodwill of a pernacious plant, Walter ducked as Flora flung the window open. For a moment the butler wracked his brain for something witty and charming to say, anythign to wipe the look of utter shock off of the housekeeper's face. "Fancy seeing you here Mrs Ryan..."

Shaking his head as Flora planted her hand on her hip's her expression turning quickly from shock to frank unamusement, Walter quickly realised if he had wanted debonair and charming then that clearly wasn't the phrase. Fumbling for the book he had brought along for just such an impasse the Butler managed to recite, "Oh Look it is my lady...Look it is my love" before the long suffering ivy began to snap under his feet.

Throwing his arms over the windowledge just in time as his footholds suddenly gave way and left the panicking butler dangling dangerously. "Help!" He managed to squeak and Flora lept to his aid, her hands gripping him under the armpits as she tried to drag the butler in through the rediculously small window. After a few minutes of pushing and pulling the butler suddenly popped through into the room sending them both crashing to the floor bringing in half of the ivy with them.

Laying still for a moment as he contemplated his aching back and scratched hands the butler at least had the consolation that it had not been entirely in vain he had at least gotten closer to Flora Ryan in the last few moments then he ever had before, and this was certainly one of the most comfortable places he had ever rested his head. However like all good things it was doomed to pass all too quickly as a moment later there was loud knocking on the door and an irate Flora rolled the reluctant butler off of her before heading towards the door.

"Oh Mrs Ryan I heard a crash are you alright?"

"I am fine Mrs Diggins I just knocked over my table..I was being clumsy."

"Do you need help to tidy up?"

"Oh No...Thank you but it is nothing serious just a few books..."

"Well if you are sure?"

"I am certain...Good night Mrs Diggins." The housekeeper added quickly slamming the door in the startled lady's maid's face.

However the butler had long since lost any interest in Mrs Diggins and instead amused himself generally nosing through Flora's possessions. It was so rare for him to gain such an intimate insight into another's private life in particular a womans. So he had rumaged through the books that were piled haphazardly on her chest of drawers, scanning the first page and searching for any inscription or dedication, not from any real fear that there was a rival for her affection but well it never hurt to know what ghosts he was up against. Then of course there were all manner of interesting nick knacks, a funny little porcelain figure, an old jewelry box spilling at the seams with all manner of broochs and pendants, and then of course there were those titilating female fripparies, stockings dying by the fire, a spare slip hanging over the back of the chair. It was only as he reached out entranced by a silken undergarment that his hand was suddenly slapped away.

Whirling around Walter came to face with a fuming Flora.

"OUT!"

Holding up his hands Walter backed up against the now closed window. "Now Flora my dear I just wanted to see you..."

"What is wrong with the stairs?"

"It's hardly as romantic."

"Or messy...And it was you who broke Mrs Diggins window I suppose?"

"Ahhh well..."

"So criminal damage as well as making a nusience of yourself!"

"Flora..." Walter began placatingly trying to wrap his arms around the housekeeper's waist. "We haven't had a moment alone in weeks."

"And It'll be weeks more Mr Jarvis...What on earth possessed you if you're caught in here then we'll both be sacked!"

"Then we'll just have to make sure we don't get caught!" Walter replied teasingly nipping playfully at her exposed neck.

"I think you should go now!" Flora insisted trying to prise his hands from found her waist. "Mrs Diggins..."

"Might still be waiting outside...So I had better wait just a little while..." Walter added catching her hands fixing her with his most puppy dog expression which quickly had her melting.

"Just a little while?"

"I promise."

"And you'll behave?"

"Naturally."

Smiling coyly Flora let him pull her over to the fireside chair and into his lap where Walter promptly took advantage after kissing her gently began to nuzzle into her neck his hands doing a rather through inventory of her other attributes.

"Walter you said you'd behave!"

Smiling against her neck Walter muttered teasingly. "I said I'd behave naturally and when I behave naturally I've never had any complaints!" He added earning him a playful slap for his cheek. "You're not complaining are you...I mean you seem to enjoy it when I do this..." Walter paused rasping his teeth against her earlobe. "And this?" He added nibbling her collarbone.

"Hmmmm. If my father were still alive he'd run you through sir!"

"That is a shame...I would have liked to meet him." Walter mumbled more intent on unbuttening her dress but her next comment definitely got his attention.

"And he'd want to know what your intentions are sir and I must admit to be a trifle curious myself."

"Ahh."

"Ahh indeed." Flora countered sharply now that she had his full attention. "After all i do think we need to come to some understanding Walter."

Tugging at his collar the butler replied nervously. "What sort of understanding did you have in mind?"

Catching his hand the housekeeper played with his fingers, biting her lip nervously. "That there will be no other dalliances...I have never been good at sharing Walter."

"Done." Walter replied quickly earning a bright smile from Flora. "I am not the sort of man to toy with a lady's affections."

"And..."

"And?" Walter coaxed when Flora blushed and couldn't continue.

"If when we...Well if there are any complications..."

"Complications?"

"Developments then." Flora added by way of clarification but still the butler drew a blank. "Oh for goodness sakes...If say after we...I mean at the moment there are only the two of us affected but when say another is involved."

"What are your trying to tell me...Is there someone else?"

"No. Oh Walter..." Flora sighed staring up at Walter's confused and distraught face. "If I get into a certain delicate condition as a result of you behaving naturally...I need to know now you'll be there."

"Oh...oooh." Walter gasped as the meaning of her words suddenly struck home. A baby. Them having a child. He had never even thought of that possibility but she was right these things do indeed happen and well the longer he thought about it, it didn't sound such a terrible idea. A son he could pass all his knowledge on to but of course it would cause a few raised eyebrows butler and housekeeper raising a family but well if anyone could manage it then they could. Gazing down at Flora he caught sight of her pensieve expression. "I'll be there...Do you want..."

"A child?" Flora finished and he nodded. "I'm not sure...I always assumed i would one day but well over the years I put it aside convinced myself that it was for the best..."

"And now?"

"And now...I think I would like your child."

Smiling Walter leant down and kissed her gently. "You know there really is no time like the present to start practising."

"Practising?" Flora giggled.

"Oh indeed we want to make sure we know how when the occassion arises."

"Well then maestro."

Not needing a second invitation Walter stood up scooping Flora up into his arms and carrying her over to the bed only pausing when in his haste he almost knocked over a whole stack of books. Giggling into is shoulder the housekeeper finally managed to gasp out. "Careful Walter remember Mrs Diggins!"

Gritting his teeth the butler retorted. "Tomorrow she moves even if it means I have to break her other bloody window!"

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