From: C3PO, Human-Cyborg Relations

To: Her Royal Highness Princess Leia Organa, R2D2, General Solo, Master Luke

NAME: See-Threepio, human-cyborg relations.

NICKNAMES: My correct designation is See-Threepio, but General Solo will insist on calling me 'Goldenrod'. Oh, the humiliation!

SEX: Technically neuter, as I'm a droid, but people usually refer to me as 'he'.

LIVING ARRANGEMENT: Wherever people send me. Usually I serve Mistress Leia, but General Solo seems to dislike me and sends me off to Master Luke.

HEIGHT: 1.65m

EYES: Two optical sensors. They are yellow in colour when I am activated.

HAIR: None.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW?: I don't watch TV.

WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?: I don't have one.

FAVORITE MAGAZINE: Droid News.

FAVORITE SMELL: I don't have any olifactory sensors.

FAVORITE COLOR: Blue.

WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD: Being doomed. It happens to me quite frequently.

BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD: Being saved from doom. It mightn't happen next time...

THINGS TO DO ON THE WEEKENDS: Complain about my hard life, work, be brought into danger by inconsiderate owners, complain.

FAVORITE MUSIC: I don't understand music.

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT OF WHEN YOU WOKE UP THIS MORNING?: Oh, my. What dreadful thing will happen to me today?

DO YOU GET MOTION SICKNESS?: Yes.

ROLLER COASTERS DEADLY OR EXCITING?: Oh my! We're doomed!

PEN OR PENCIL?: Laser stylus.

HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE?: One.

FAVORITE FOODS: Lubricant.

DO YOU GET ALONG WITH YOUR PARENTS?: I don't have parents. I don't remember who made me.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN CONVICTED OF A CRIME: No. I'm sure it's only a matter of time.

CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?: Neither. I don't eat.

DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE?: No. I don't like it when my excitable counterpart, Artoo-Detoo, drives, either.

DO YOU SLEEP WITH STUFFED ANIMALS?: No. I don't sleep, I shut down.

IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY KIND OF PET, WHAT WOULD IT BE?: Artoo-Detoo is enough trouble on his own.

IF YOU COULD BE ANY TYPE OF ANIMAL WHAT WOULD YOU BE?:

THUNDERSTORMS, COOL OR SCARY?: Oh, my, we're doomed!

IF YOU COULD MEET ANYONE DEAD OR ALIVE, WHO WOULD IT BE?:

FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK: I don't drink, but sometimes Master Luke uses neat ethanol to clean my casing.

WHAT IS YOUR ZODIAC SIGN?: None. No one remembers my birthday, I'm only a droid...

EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI?: I don't eat broccoli. I don't eat.

GUYS-WOULD YOU GIVE UP YOUR SHIRT FOR A GIRL? I don't have a shirt.

IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED, WHAT WOULD IT BE?: Something peaceful and quiet.

IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR, WHAT WOULD IT BE?: I have no hair.

IF YOU COULD HAVE A TATTOO, WHAT AND WHERE WOULD IT BE?: Pain! Oh, my.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE?: No.

DESCRIBE YOUR DREAM WEDDING: Who would ever marry me?

WHAT IS ON YOUR WALLS IN YOUR ROOM?: Oil.

IS THE GLASS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL? My glass is completely empty. And someone's broken it, too.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SNAPPLE?: Oh, my.

ARE YOU A RIGHTY, LEFTY OR AMBIDEXTROUS?: Ambidextrous.

DO YOU TYPE WITH YOUR FINGERS ON THE RIGHT KEYS?: Yes.

WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED?: I don't have a bed. I generally end up shut down where I happen to be at the time.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER : Three.

WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR?: Oh, my. Do you really think I would be allowed a car?

WHAT IS YOUR DREAM CAR?: I don't want a car. They are too dangerous.

FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH: I don't have time to watch sport.

SAY ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU: Master Luke, you never forget about me or say 'It's just a droid.'

OF ALL THE PEOPLE YOU SEND THIS TO, WHO IS LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND TO IT: General Solo.