A/N House meets a kindred spirit, ornery, bitter and world weary. Wonderful chaos ensues, only problem being he's actually beginning to like having a person around and she's only got a month. Not as fluffy as sounds. But should be a helluva lotta fun!

I've only just started watching House and LOVE it! If I screw anything up, help me out okay? I LIVE for your feedback, and I hope you like this fic. (I'm also terrible with the medical jargon, forgive me) This chap's bit longer than usual because the prologue's snuck in. :)

PROLOGUE

"Wilson I'm afraid you're losing your touch if you can't tell straight off this poor sucker's dead. About a month I'm thinking."

House handed Dr. Wilson back his case file and was about to limp off when the good doctor thrust the file back into his hands again. He had a desperate look about his face and pleaded with his eyes.

"House, just look one more time, okay?"

House didn't and continued to stare right back.

"No. It's quite clear just from the MRI that she's got a tumor in her brain the size of a lemon that we can't extract without killing her off right and it's in such a bitchy position that once it grows more it'll completely smother the nervous sensors in her brain and she will die. I'd give her two weeks. A month if she's a fighter."

"But you always find a way. Always, House."

"No, no good doctor, that is only because I deal in diagnostics where every poor bastard that walks through my doors is some exotic case and I can just figure out which drugs to pop 'em with, that you could never think of. It's the same methods any competent, and I do say competent, doctor could perform in this hospital. She's nothing special, the only interesting thing is the tumor's benign and hasn't really affected her in any other way, a lot of lucky misses actually, the chemo's the main thing making her sick apart from the ticking time bomb her brain's turned into. You already know what to do with this one, tell her she's dying."

He thrust the case file back into Wilson's hands again.

"Keep her in your ward, give her enough meds to keep her happy, feed her, clean her, just like a hotel service, but better. It's the only benefit most patients get out of the hospital system anyway, they don't have to get up to pee."

"But there must be something-"

All of a sudden there was a crash coming from the elevators on the floor. House heard Dr. Wilson swear and tear down the hall to join the mass of nurses and ward staff holding down a furious woman to a stretcher bed.

"I don't want your fucking PITY PARTY!"

House's eyebrows rose. He called out to Wilson before picking himself up a cup of coffee and limping off,

"I change my mind Wilson, bump me to lead doctor on this."

CHAPTER 1

Cuddy was furious. But then, when was Cuddy ever…well, cuddly?

"Don't think I don't know you House."

"I am being the professional you always wanted me to be. Caring, nurturing, sympathetic…my patient needs me by her side, and I will see to it she gets the best of care."

"You're turning this to an excuse so you can get off clinic duty for a month and leave your interns to struggle under what should be your cases. If you want a holiday, you've certainly got the days, so just say so."

"Oh, now what holiday would it be if I couldn't look at Cameron's ass at least once a day?"

That was a touchy subject Cuddy knew not to push, despite how many times he made light and cruel mockery of it. She sighed, exasperated as House always made her.

"If you don't want this case as an excuse to get your own obscure version of a rest, then what the hell is your reasoning?"

House shrugged and pretended to light up like a little boy.

"She's cool!"

"You don't play with people's lives like that House."

House's blue eyes grew a shade darker.

"And when did you start to adopt that particular philosophy?"

The hand on his cane gripped a little tighter and he made his way out of the office with the ominous click of wood against the floor. He picked up the case file off of Cuddy's desk with nonchalance oozing out of each gesture and his gravely voice was lined with anger.

"Make the arrangements, I'm not backing down."

The nurse fidgeted with the customary clipboard and struggled to find the right words to break the worst news to the patient sitting before her.

"Now this might be a little difficult for you—"

The patient snorted,

"Get on with it."

"Urm…I'm afraid there's a bit of bad news…I'm terribly sorry—"

The patient obnoxiously tapped her hand against her thigh, not able to tap her feet because she was sitting up in the standard hospital bed.

"Uh-huh."

"Things have taken a turn for the worse."

The patient screamed her agony and flung her pillow at the startled nurse.

"My GOD! Do I LOOK like a six year old to you? Could you please treat me like a grown up and quite sugarcoating every damn thing you say? Don't you think I know I've been screwed since day one? No, no don't open your fucking mouth, someone get the doctor, go on scram! You're no good for anything except getting the doctor aren't you? C'mon! Someone act like a damn professional!"

The terrified nurse ran right out of the room still being chased by the patient's colourful obscenities and the extra pillow. She stopped dead in front of House, visibly upset and pointed unnecessarily to the room.

"Patient needs you doctor,"

And then fled.

House kept in a chuckle and opened the door to the room where he saw the patient had now picked up a bedpan.

"That's not full of piss is it?"

The patient noticed it wasn't the nurse and set the pan down.

"No, I don't have to use it. Only good thing about this place, I get a tube."

House gave a knowing smile and sat down heavily in the seat beside the patient's bed. He picked up the clipboard and looked at it with disinterest.

"Kate Hathaway."

"Think Taming of the Shrew."

House continued to look at the clipboard before setting it down. He then looked back at Kate. She would have been absolutely beautiful if it didn't look like she had sliced all the smiles off her face and the deep wrinkles weren't scars a result of it. According to the clipboard she was only a year or two younger than he was, so not young, but she still looked as if she had aged prematurely. Probably had quite a shitty, stressful life.

And she wasn't looking at him expectantly with some scrap of hope or desperation. She seemed to not care what the clipboard said or already knew and didn't give chickenshit.

"You'll die in a month."

"Wow, that long."

"That what you wanted to hear?"

"Nobody wants to hear anything except the sound of their own pretty voice."

House had to try harder to keep the laugh in.

"You're not upset?"

"I'm very upset. The world needs more bitches like me."

"You take this very well, most patients would be upset or have some hysterical breakdown."

"Or start some fucked up cancer foundation, give sappy interviews on T.V. cry and talk about how much they love their families and blah, blah. I don't mind being a statistic, I think numbers are fun."

"That's quite unusual behavior."

"I'm not a saint. Feed me, give me morphine and let me go happy."

"We will have to keep you at the hospital until further notice. There are some procedures we'd like to go over—"

"No."

House had warmed up to the crusty woman lying on the bed the moment he had heard her in front of the elevators. Why did the lonely and broken always gravitate together? Or amuse each other for that matter? He gave a nod for her to continue.

"Tell me my options first."

"Well, we can undergo a surgical procedure, though it may have repercussions—"

"Shut up. I used to date a forensic scientist whose hobby was entomology. Don't spew your medical jargon with me and tell it to me straight, that's what drove me insane. I expected better from a sour cripple like you."

Ooh, feisty. And the jab about his leg didn't bother him in the least either, they were on the same level. She was dying, he knew she knew, and had gotten past it. He had his leg, and had gotten past it. They both pulled the shortest straw out of the magical medical wonders hat and lost, poor bastards. Fine, fiesta. They could all sniff each other out from the crowd. It was when the perfectly healthy poked their noses in, well…

"Your only option is time. If we go with the surgery, we'll kill you. If you want to get it over with, we'll do some medical fudging and go ahead with it, on the off chance you'll survive without a substantial part of your brain, or we let you waste away. That gives you a month."

"Would it be ironic if I said, I think I'd rather die?"

House shrugged but their eyes locked and shared a smile.

"Okay, well I think I'd rather have a month of a morphine high before going, how's that sound?"

"Yeah, I would have gone for that too, knock yourself out. But you know, morphine's out of the question, but I'll dig up some other goody for you and spew some bullshit on the paperwork."

"Right, college days, rah, rah."

House laboriously got up from his seat, using his cane to support him and wincing a little. Damn thing fell asleep.

"I'll be making regular rounds, I'm the head doc on your case, and you just sit tight."

"Yeah, bring a 'goody' when you do."

House left the room and quietly shut the door behind him. He went down the hall in search of coffee. He knew he hadn't been as scathing as he usually was, in fact, he was quite tame in comparison with his ornery self on usual cases. And compared to her. Kate the shrew indeed.

But the losers in life, they can spot each other out. Especially when they know they've been drinking life's hearty cup of fuck-you their whole lives and have acquired a taste for it. House had only met one other person like him, and that was in a bar and the one hour conversation was more stimulating than he had ever had the pleasure to receive than anything else. Almost anything else.

And here was another now. But with quite spirit. Spirit like the burning whiskey he now decided he was going to look for at the back of his desk's drawer instead of coffee.

A/N Please R/R! There's a cameo from another fav. TV show of mine in the next chap, it'll be fun or interesting at the very least. I promise. Feedback much appreciated!