The Feeling of Trust
Author: Donna Lynn
E-mail:
Status: Complete
Word Count: 1,625
Category: Drama/Angst
Spoilers/Rumors: "Suspicion" "The Siege Part 1, 2 & 3"
Season: 2
Rating: PG
Content Warning: Mild everything but rated PG to be safe.
Summary: After the events in "The Siege 3" Teyla finds John on a balcony and decides to ask him a few questions? Does Bates know what he's talking about?
Author's Note: Wasn't enough moments for them in the opener so here's my tag for the episode.
Pairing: John/Teyla
Disclaimer: The characters of "Stargate: Atlantis" do not belong to me. So DO NOT sue me!

John closed his eyes and let her soft comforting voice flow over his senses. The sound of her voice had a calming effect he would never understand. He didn't care just as long as she was safe with the rest of the city and its people. He heard her step up next to him but he didn't look at her. There were too many thoughts going through his mind right now. The almost destruction of the city at the hands of the Wraith, the loss of Ford and almost loosing Teyla and Elizabeth.

"Do you wish to be alone?" she asked gently.

He took a deep breath and let it out shaking his head. "No," he turned to look at her. "I could use some company."

She smiled softly and looked to peer out over the open ocean. "You seem troubled?" she glanced at him then returned her gaze back to the sea before her.

He shrugged vaguely, "I'm alright just…events as of late haven't been too good."

She nodded, "I understand." She paused. "We should consider ourselves lucky that the Wraith believe we are gone."

"Yeah but how long is it going to last?" he asked aloud. "We still have to gate travel and the chances of running into a Wraith party are always high. One of them could always give away our position…then Atlantis. We'd be right back where we started."

"We must take things one step at a time Major," she reminded. "We must do what we can for the time being."

He nodded in agreement then leaned against the rail facing her. "Are the Athosians settled back nicely?" he wanted to talk about something other than Ford, the Wraith or the fact that he thought he lost everyone he cared about in a blink of an eye. If they hadn't got the shield back up when they did…

She gave him a genuine smile, "Oh yes, they are thankful for all of our efforts."

"Good," he smiled softly turning his gaze to the ocean once again.

They stood in silence for the longest time just enjoying the lull of the ocean. The sky was plundered with colors from the explosion above. Luckily it didn't leave any radiation or they would have been in trouble. Without knowing how to get the city to, well fly, they were pretty much stuck.

"I…" Teyla started looking down at her hands. "…have not had the opportunity to ask you since the attacks…" she trailed off looking at him like an unexpected child.

He met her gaze worriedly not sure about her expression. "What?" he asked.

She swallowed looking down at her hands again. "When we returned from the possible alpha site…Sergeant Bates said some things…" she found it hard to say what she wanted to say as she glanced at him.

Sheppard felt his throat tighten as he remembered what she was talking about.

(Flashback)

"I told you she was a liability, sir! Now I'm not gonna let your personal feelings endanger this facility any longer!" Bates yelled to Sheppard.

Teyla looked between the two men almost horrified, "What!"

(End Flashback)

He cleared his throat and laced his fingers together and faced her against the railing. With the impending attacks on Atlantis and dealing with the surrounding Hive ships neither had much time to stop and talk. "What about Bates?" he asked quietly looking down at her. She was so short compared to him. He was a whopping six foot two and she was only five foot two, a whole foot between them.

She looked up at him but didn't turn to face him. "When we returned from M1M-316 he accused me of giving our position away to the Wraith but…he accused you of something as well," she said.

Back peddle John and do it fast he told himself. "Bates says a lot of things when he's strung out," he tried to play it off.

"It has been said before," she wasn't letting the issue fall.

Sheppard felt the hairs on the back of his neck rise. He wasn't ready for this conversation with Teyla. He wasn't ready to admit anything other than purely platonic feelings for her. He knew she knew he cared about her more than just a liaison but that's the way he wanted it for now. It wasn't that he didn't want to confess his profound feelings, he was just a chicken shit.

(Flashback)

"What's that Sergeant?"

"She was conveniently absent during the ambush," Bates pointed out.

"So was Ford maybe it was him," McKay interjected with his own sarcastic attitude.

Bates glared at McKay, "I'm just stating a fact sir."

Sheppard was up from his chair before he even realized it, "Sergeant, I'm only going to say this once…"

"…with all due respect Major you can reprimand me if you wish but it's been six times your team has been compromised. Only one Athosian knew about this last mission."

The gate began to engage.

"We have an unscheduled offworld activation," the tech said. "It's Teyla's IDC receiving a radio transmission."

Everyone stepped close to hear the transmission.

"This is Teyla, Lt. Ford has been wounded…the Wraith are closing in on our position…" her transmission broke in and out.

"You put down that shield and we could be opening up this base to a Wraith attack," Bates quickly spat.

"Atlantis…please…let us through…"

The gateroom filled with security and they filed into place aiming at the gate.

Elizabeth looked on feeling torn, "Lt. Ford can you confirm the situation?"

"He is unconscious. Our situation grows desperate…soon we will have no choice but to go through the Stargate…" she cuts out again.

"We drop that shield and who knows what she'll bring through the gate with her," Bates was not letting the issue go. He was insistent on Teyla being a threat.

Elizabeth looked between Bates and Sheppard unsure of what to do.

John looked like he was about to rip someone's head off. "Open the damn gate!" he yelled at her.

(End Flashback)

It pained him to rethink what happened, what felt like so long ago.

(Flashback)

"Again with all due respect Major I believe you're putting your personal feelings in front of your…"

"You're dismissed!" Sheppard interrupted rather quickly.

(End Flashback)

Sheppard closed his eyes briefly with the sudden flood of memories.

(Flashback)

"What the hell is this?" Sheppard asked McKay annoyed.

"I know how it looks it was a special request from Sergeant Bates," McKay explained rather lamely.

"I'm gonna bust that son of a bitch!" Sheppard exploded.

"Major…"

"…Teyla has nothing to do with this," Sheppard said almost desperately like he was exhausted.

"The thing is he was right," McKay finally spoke.

McKay felt sorry for Sheppard when a look of pure betrayal crossed his features.

"Bates was right?" Sheppard finally said.

McKay nodded, "I know I was as surprised as you are. Look at this…" he motioned for Sheppard to come over. "It's her locket it's a transmitter. It's been broadcasting a continuous signal…I wouldn't even have noticed if I hadn't been looking for it specifically…"

"…I found it," Sheppard almost sounded relieved and annoyed at the same time.

"What?"

Sheppard grabbed the trinket, "Back on her planet the first time we met. Teyla took me to the old ruins and that was half buried in dirt…I gave it to her…"

(End Flashback)

"John?" she reached out and touched his shoulder. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," his words came out a strangled whisper as he gazed at her.

She touched his face without thought. "What has Sergeant Bates been accusing you of?" she asked gently. It was obvious the mans ramblings upset him.

How did he explain to her what was happening? The head of security thinks I'm screwing you? No, not like that. "Bates thinks I'm putting my personal feelings for you ahead of my duty," he looked into her eyes to gage her reaction. He could see the surprise instantly.

Her brow creased for a second. "He believes…"

"…that we're involved," he finished. "My trust in you scares him."

She looked even more confused now. "I do not understand?"

"He believes you cloud my judgment," he revealed quietly. "That's what Bates means when he says I'm putting my personal feelings for you first."

Teyla was struck to say the least. Am I truly a distraction she wondered. "Perhaps…I should transfer to another team if my presence has caused…"

"…no! You're not going anywhere just because Bates wants to stick his nose in my and yours business!" Sheppard boomed. "I care for you that isn't a crime and I'm not gonna act like it is!" He turned away running a hand through his hair with his back to her.

She stared at his back for the longest of moments. Nothing was said between them just silence.

"I care for you more than I probably should," he voiced softly. He turned and faced her with sad eyes. "But it's something I can't face right now."

She stepped away from the railing and went to stand before him. She placed her hands on his shoulders and looked into his eyes. "You, John Sheppard, are unlike any man I have ever encountered. You are strong, honest and most of all you are loyal to those you care for. If you are guilty of anything it is ignoring those traits that make you who you are." They stared into one another's eyes for a long moment then he grasped her face and rested his forehead against hers.

What Bates said was true. John Sheppard did have personal feelings for Teyla Emmagan…but what Bates failed to realize…was that it was a feeling of unexplainable trust.

The End