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Anime/Manga » X/1999 » Dreams of Grey
crsg
Author of 166 Stories
Rated: T - English - Angst - Yuzuriha N. & Fuuma M. - Reviews: 3 - Published: 11-04-05 - Complete - id:2646600

It was dark and hard to move or see or hear or think, but the young girl was not afraid. In the depths of her mind, she knew it to be a dream - such darkness could not exist in real life, she felt confidently sure. But even that thought seemed far away, so she relaxed further and waited to see what would happen.

"Hello, my dear."

She didn't recognise the voice. Or rather, she did, but could not put a face to it. The voice was deep and struck a chord somewhere within her. She wanted, very much, to know whom the speaker was, but could not seem to find the will to ask.

"I'm... this... is a dream", she managed to say. There did not seem to be enough air, yet she was not gasping for breath. There was simply not enough air to talk, that was all.

"Yes", the voice agreed. "This is your dream."

"Oh." The girl thought for a moment. A new thought occurred, but before she could marshal her mind enough to speak it, a pair of arms entwined her. They were strong, bare. Neither warm nor cold, but unmistakably male. She didn't want them to let go.

"I... I want..."

"Speak on, young one. I would hear what it is that you want." That voice was delicious. She compared it to rich chocolate, smooth and nice. She wanted, although she could not think of what it was exactly that she did want.

"I want you to kiss me."

She didn't realise that it was what she wanted until the words had come from her mouth. When they did, she wanted even more, so that her want seemed to suck up still more air.

"Then I shall do so."

He didn't give her time to speak again, but she did not want to speak. All she wanted now was...

This...

And so because it was a dream, the girl did not blush or look away shyly or feel uncertain about anything. Instead she kissed him back with a fullness that a much maturer woman might have. His lips were hot, burning. Yet no pain was present, not even as he tightened his grip with his arms. Only the air lessened even more, so that her breath came in quick, sharp gasps. A thought floated lazily into her mind that he liked this, he liked that she was relaxed and did not flinch or pull away as he pressed against her from her back, so that he encircled her almost completely.

"Oh..."

Not a noise of confusion; her slim school-girl body did not match what she felt and how much she wanted. Yes, this was what she had wanted. Despite her age, she was not without her own desires. She wanted what the others all had, and now she had too.. Her outward appearance, noisy and cheerful, led others to believe that she was all she seemed on the outside, but she wasn't, she wasn't. She wanted too, just like the rest of them.

"But... but who are you?" She wondered out loud. The voice did not answer for a moment. When it did, she could still not place it. She knew she had heard it from somewhere... but where? Did it even matter? The reply slid over her like warm water over her head.

"Think, child. You know me. Think, and the answer will come to you."

All thoughts were temporarily driven out of her mind as he kissed her again. She found herself inexplicably lying down. He was on top of her, and she could make out arms, legs, a muscular torso. He was naked but then, so was she. She didn't mind. In a dream, it did not matter what happened, or how. He was very handsome, she could tell. The skin was perfect, flawless. And his face... she could see the shape, thin and narrow without being overly so, but the features remained in shadow. Who was he?

"You're not anybody I know."

"Ah, but I am. You need only to think. Who is it that you know?"

"I know Subaru... you're not Subaru. Or Sorata. I don't... I can't think-" It was too hard to think, and she didn't want to think anyway. She only wished to push the thoughts recklessly out. She didn't want to think, but only to feel. As long as she was thinking, she could not feel all there was to feel. And she wanted to feel every last drop-

"If you cannot think, there is no need to know."

Still the answer danced just out of her reach, dancing along the edge of her mind and her grasp. It annoyed her, it made her think. Looking at the outline of his face, she could almost... something about the strong lines there, the hint of... something. Masculine, powerful.

But the answer eluded her, and so she closed her eyes and let herself be kissed, and held still when he brought one slow, near-teasing hand down her side to cup her breast and then move on as if it had never paused. He pressed forward and she arched her back because it felt right to do so.

"I see you know what you want", he said approvingly. She flushed a little, pleased, and shuddered - not from fear or displeasure - when he surged forward again. It felt good, it must be right... she breathed deeply, and the air she inhaled now was thick with a musky tang and the heavy scent of her own sweat, and of...

...Blood-

"You... you are - stop..."

Her voice was weak but suddenly shrill. The hand that had moved to her middle did as she asked, and the voice held laughter.

"What is it, my dear?"

"I know who you are..."

Now she could speak only in a whisper. The air, thick and lingering, became suffocating. Breathing... she knew pain now, she couldn't breathe and it hurt like dreams were not supposed to. You could not hurt in dreams, Grandma had always said...

"Who am I? Who's face can you see?"

The voice was mocking, close to her ear. She already knew whose face would be revealed from the shadows, but seeing it so suddenly and clearly came as a shock. She wondered how he could hear her voice, so quiet was it in the darkness surrounding them both.

"The Kamui of the Dragons of Earth..."

"Congratulations, my dear; I see you know me now. It has taken you some time."

The fact he spoke so calmly frightened her even more, and she struggled to get up. One hand was still upon her, and he did not let her go.

"However, you knew me before didn't you? You would have known it to be me, had you looked hard enough. But you didn't want to. You could not admit it, even to yourself, that it was I you have wanted. That you still want."

"You're lying!"

His hand was so strong, she could not possibly move it. Her legs were completely immobilized despite her efforts to move his body from them.

"Why do you struggle, child? Have you not yet realised why I am here? Ask the question. You shall receive your answer."

And it occurred to her. She stopped struggling immediately, frozen by the echo of her own voice within her mind. She didn't want to ask, didn't want to know... but she had to ask, even if she did not want to hear. His voice demanded it, and her lips moved against, almost, her own will.

"... Why are you in my dream...?"

She could no longer breathe.

"Why?" His voice was so close, and his own lips tickled her ear as he gave the only answer. Heat, pain. She was dizzy, the lack of air making her head spin.

"Because you wished it."

There was a sudden rush of air, then, and laughter. She bolted upright from her bed, letting out an involuntary scream.

"Yuzuriha!"

The door opened, and strong light hurt her eyes. She shaded them with one hand, and the other betrayed her and found her breasts. They felt large, swollen. But it must be her own mind playing tricks, she knew, because she had on her long white nightie, her favourite one that Grandma-

"What's wrong?"

Urgent voices... the light... she felt lightheaded still, as if the world had not yet quite ceased to spin. There was a smell that made her feel sick. Yuzuriha tried to explain, hearing herself babble.

"He's here! Oh god, I don't want it, I never wished for that...!"

"-She was dreaming-"

"-But he could've been-"

"-No, I don't think so-"

"-I'll check outside-"

The numerous voices all at once confused her, and finally they all faded out and only one remained.

"Are you alright now?"

"...Yes. Sorry. I thought... but it was so real..."

"Dreams often are", the elder woman soothed. Her hair was a vivid red even in the dim light from the doorway. "But there's nothing to worry about... would you like to talk about it? What was it about?" She looked at Yuzuriha closely, and watched the girl shrink back a little, clutching her nightie. Poor thing, Karen mused, frightened by nightmares that she was perhaps too young to be having. Her skin was pale, eyes seeming too large for her face as she answered.

"... I... I don't remember."

"That's alright. Just try and get some sleep. You must be exhausted - we've all had a trying day, but I'm sure tomorrow will be better. Okay?"

Yuzuriha nodded and closed her eyes. She didn't want to think, or feel.

"Do you want me to leave the door open...?" Karen was always considerate of her, but this once Yuzuriha did not want the older woman about.

"Closed is fine. I'll be okay."

"Alright. Goodnight, Yuzuriha."

The door was slowly shut, and the Yuzuriha leaned back against the pillows, relieved.

"Just a dream", she murmured, rolling over into the softness of the bed. She inhaled slowly and then turned quickly over onto her back again. The smell was still there, pungently sweet. It made her feel ill, and she kept her eyes closed. So she did not see a thin shadow outside the window that moved as no shadow quite should. It left as silently as it had come, slipping easily into what was left of the night.

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