Why me?

By: Huntress X

As always the X-men do not belong to me, so don't sue!

Summery: The diary of Juliana Faith Howlett, daughter of Jubilee and Wolverine

Well I guess I should start by telling you a little about myself. My name is Juliana Faith Howlett but people call me Julie, I just turned 15 two months ago and I am the second born child of Jubilation Lee Howlett and Logan James Howlett, also know as Jubilee and Wolverine two of the strongest members of the X-men. Almost all of the kids at the Xavier estate are training to become future X-men, but they only allow members over 20.

I have 4 siblings, first off is my big brother, his name is Logan Wolf Howlett but we call him Wolf well, mom calls him Logan, but mostly when he´s in trouble, he´s 17 and a real pain.

Then we have my little sister Kayley Fox Howlett, she´s 12, and worried about things way to much sometimes, she is really depressing for someone that young. She has a new Save the forest or Help the animals thing going every week. And after her we have James Matthew Howlett, I know mom named both guys after dad, actually that was just a lucky guess so to speak, mom always wanted to name a child James, even before dad got his memories back. Anyway James is 9 and has way too much energy.

And at last we have Riley Christopher Howlett he is 7 years old and just came to us last year, his adopted. Dad was the one who found him, locked in a cage…apparently his parents had tested him for the x-gene and he had been positive, like that gives you the right to lock a small child in a cage, they hadn't even named him. When he came home after his trip last year, Riley was with him. And after a few months living with him mom wanted to adopt him.

Well that's my family and if you haven't already guessed, we are mutants. All of us kids (except Riley) have claws, a healing factor and sensitive senses from dad but that´s not all.

I can shoot yellow plasma from my hands, much like mom's powers. Wolf can fly, I wish I could to sometimes but hey when mom was my age they didn't know she would fly either, and then Kayley, she can turn herself into water and she can control it to, well she doesn't have full control yet but she is getting better. Jim has these green whips coming out of his hands and when they hit you it really hurts, I mean really. Riley can shoot little blue, I guess you can call them birds, from his hand but they are still very small.

And just so you know, we are not the mutant version of the Camden´s, but we are okay.

We live in a big house right below the mansion, often referred to as "the H house". My dad wanted mom to have a house of her own so when she got pregnant with me he started build it, with some help. So it would be ready by the time I was born and it was.

Mom is the one who takes care of us and the home. She makes sure we get up, that we eat right and that we follow the rules and yeah she makes sure dad doesn't kill my dates.

I had my first date when I was 13, mom was really happy she even took me shopping for a new dress! Dad was…well he spent a few hours in the danger-room that day. But then again he didn't like it when Wolf started dating either, he didn't try to kill his date but he told him You get her pregnant and I´ll kill you.

I´m so glad that mom had the "talk" with me.

Well otherwise I spend my days in school of course. I go to a private high school (thankfully without any uniforms), and after school, me and some friends from school usually go down to the mall and some days I stay to look at the cheerleading practice. Yep I want to be a cheerleader, mom once said that she couldn't understand how she could get such a girlie girl, and I guess I am. Lee says that too, Lee is the son of Cyclops and Phoenix also known as Uncle Scott and Aunt Jean, he's named after mom. Why? Well you see mom and Aunt Jean got pregnant with me and Lee at the same time, so they went to those baby courses together and one time they got stuck in the elevator and guess who went into labor? That's right Lee was born in an elevator and he was delivered by mom.

We are practically the only kids who were born that close in age around here, we are what they (they being the adults) call the Next Generation. Wolf was born first, then Rachel (Lee´s big sister) and then the rest of the little monsters.

Lee is my best friend, sure we fight (I always win) but I like him, even though he is a Summer´s.

Did I mention the X-men? because that´s what we are or will be, your not allowed to become an X-man until you are 20, which is stupid, my mom became a member when she was like 12 and I could so do it. But do they let me? Nooooo.

October 12.

There is one thing I don't understand right now and that's why mom and dad couldn't stop having kids after me? I mean they had one boy and one girl couldn't they be happy with that? No apparently they couldn't because they had to have three more kids; three of the most annoying kids that have ever been born into this world!

First I found Kayley in my new top that is way to big for her, she´s got nothing to fill it out with, and that's what I told her. She took it off, tossed it on the floor and rushed out to mom, who then told me to be more sensitive towards my little sister. Like if, she started it.

Then when I came home from school I found Jim with my favorite lip-gloss using it as a pencil, he said it was much better to color with. Why do they always have to take MY stuff? So anyway I freaked and screamed at him and started to hunt him around the house and that´s when dad came in through the front door and the little brat jumped hurried over to him for cover.

He´s 8 dad said and took the lip-gloss (that didn't have much left in it) and gave it back to me.

So, what! Don't you have a brain when your 8? See they are horrible…well I guess Riley isnt that bad…yet.

Well between the new top and my lip-gloss I had a pretty good day at school. Lee and I get to ride with Wolf or Rachel to school since we all go to the same school. I and Lee have almost all of our classes together and that´s good cause he´s way better in math and biology then me, not that I´m bad but I just don't have the energy to study sometimes.

Before first period my friend Crystal told me that Dean Harris (like the cutest guy in school, and a friend of Wolf) was having a party tomorrow night because his parents were out of town, and he had asked her to bring me, ME! Dean had asked me to come; well he had asked Crystal to bring me but it´s almost the same!

I went through the rest of the day with a smile on my face (until I got home to the whole lip-gloss thing), and it got even better at lunch when the cheerleading committee announced that they were looking for new blood, and their captain told me and Crystal that we had to try out because she had seen us do some tricks before. We just smiled and said yes, so Dean likes me and I´m becoming a cheerleader, my best school day and probably dad's worst nightmare. Hehe Oh mom's calling, dinners ready gotta go!

Okay, I asked them if I could go to the party and they said yes! Wolf had already told them about it and that he was going, I bet dad will ask him to keep an eye on me. They did ask us if there was going to be any adults around and we said yes, it´s technically true, Dean´s older sister is home and she is 21. So it wasn't a lie, dad can smell lies.

I also told them that I was trying out for cheerleading; mom said that she thought it was great and that I needed a hobby, and dad asked if I was trying to kill him. Jumping around like that infront of thousands of guys in a small top and a miniskirt? Really did I want him dead?

Then mom told him to stop being such a drama queen and then dad asked if she had just called him a women. At that mom just smiled and gave him a kiss on the cheek as she went to the kitchen to get dessert.

But anyway I´m so going to the party tomorrow! Hmmm what am I going to wear?

October 13

Okay so it´s Friday the 13th …that doesn't mean anything bad is going to happen…right?

I mean everything was okay in school, no super villain tried to take over the world and I have found a really good outfit to wear at the party! I have this new pink tank top with spaghetti straps that sparkles and a black miniskirt and with that a pair of black boots.

Too that I was planning on a light pink eye shadow, mascara and a pink lip-gloss, and I´ll probably do my hair so it falls in big Hollywood locks)

My hair and my sister hair both have the same blue shine that our mom has, we also have the blue eyes but then again all we kids have blue eyes (even Riley). I sometimes wish I had my sister's hair, she actually have natural locks and they look really good to if she would just let her hair out of her ponytail once and awhile. My hair is long and….well not strait because it does like curl up a little at the ends but it´s not like Kayley´s. All the time when I was growing up (well guess I´m still growing) people have been telling me that I look just like mom, in whatever age I was currently in, and based on the pictures I have seen I do agree with them although I have a much better fashion sense.

Kayley kinda look like me so I guess she looks like mom to but you can clearly see dad in her, you can in me too mom says especially when I lose my temper.

Now Wolf there you have a younger copy of dad, not as much hair though but it do have two points just like daddy's. Now James is a real mix between both mom and dad and mom says he got grandma's nose and Riley…well he has the same face shape anyway.

Well I´m going to get something to eat before I get ready for the party, can't spill anything on my cloths!

I´ll write more when I come home!

Okay tonight started out fine, Wolf and I got to the party just when it was getting good and because dad had insisted that Wolf would both drive me there and drive me home I get to say out just as late as he does, that would be until one. Haha! Dad's plane backfired on him!

But since Wolf was with me and we were spending the whole evening in a friend's house, mom convinced that it would be fine. She had this way to calm him down; when I was 6 my dad once told me that mom was his lifeline, the one who could always give him peace, must be nice to have someone like that.

Well anyway we got there and the party had been going on for about an hour, the first person I run into is Crystal , she was dressed in this gorgeous red satin dress that ended right above her knees, it went great with her light chocolate skin. She was smiling and her deep green eyes sparkled.

She told me that Amanda had told her that Parker Evans in our English class had the biggest crush on her and that they had been dancing ever since she got there, he was on his way to get her some punch.

"He has been so sweet the whole evening" Crystal said and grabbed my arm.

"The whole evening has just been about an hour" I told her with smile.

"Yeah, yeah" She said. "And look over there, isnt that Dean?" I looked over and saw the guy with the golden blond hair, dressed in blue jeans and a black shirt. "Oh yes it is, let´s go very and say hi"

Crystal dragged me through the sea of people and over to Dean and some guys he was talking to.

He was standing with his back to us and I who suddenly couldn't speak had no idea what to do.

"You´re gonna thank me for this later" Crystal then told me.

"For what?" I asked, she smiled at me and gave me a small push so that I bumped into Dean. She is so dead.

"Sorry" I mumbled as he turned around.

"Hey, Julie" He said with a smile. "I was wondering where your were, I saw Wolf coming in, I must have missed you"

"Yeah" I said, I must have looked like a fool with that big grin on my face. Dean then put and arm around me and started leading me to the backyard.

"Let´s get you something to drink" He said and took me to a big table that had been placed by the pool, it was filled with beer, other drinks that probably had alcohol in them and some punch.

"What would you like?" He asked.

"Punch" I told him looking around as he was pouring me one, I saw Wolf standing with some friends with a beer in his hands. Hope he gets a headache I thought, our healing factors isnt as strong as dad's get, we still have a long way to go. I know Wolf don't drink, not really, he most likely goes around with that one beer all night, just he don't want to look stupid.

"Here ya go" Dean said and gave me a cup of the red punch.

"Thanks" I said and drank it. "Taste good" I said and it did, funny but good.

"Well have some more we have allot left"

And I did, I drank allot more….and I´m suppose to have good smell…well I didn't use it tonight, then I might have smelled how much alcohol that was in that punch.

I started to get really, really drunk since I hadn't had alcohol before and when things started to spin I would have really freaked if it hadn't been for Dean who was standing next to me, mostly because I couldn't really stand up strait by myself.

"Are you okay?" He asked as he sat me down on sofa inside.

"Yeah…sure" I said hearing how weird I sounded.

"If you say so" Dean said. "Sure you don't want me to get your brother?"

"Noooo" I said. "You don't have to do that, you're here" I said and now I can so never look him in the eye ever again.

"Yeah I am" He said and it was then I, even though my drunken state, notes how close he had come. "You really feel okay"

"Better then ever" I said quietly as he leaned in even closer and before I knew it he had pressed his lips against mine.

"Hey man!" A voice suddenly yelled and Dean let go my lips and looked up. "Your dad is on the phone and he sounds pissed.

"Oh shit" Dean said and stood up. "I have to go, I´ll be back in a few Julie"

"Yeah" I said as he left, the world started to spin again and I felt really sick. My stomach was turning over and my head was pounding, I slowly stood up and walked, the best that I could, out into the fresh air. I stepped out through the front door away from all the people, I didn't feel like being around anyone.

"Oh God" Was the only thing I managed to say before both my lunch fallowed by my dinner came up and landed on Mrs. Harris price winning roses. As I was standing there throwing up more food then I thought was possible a hand touched my shoulder, I turned around to see Crystal.

"Oh my God Julie" She said and looked at me. "How much did you drink? And since when do you drink?"

"Everything is spinning" Was the only thing I said.

"Okay Julie just sit down here" She said and sat me down so I was leaning against the house. "I´ll go and find Wolf"

I sighed as she left, trying to breathe in the fresh air so that things would stop spinning, everything just felt like hell and all I wanted was mommy and my bed.

I felt something more coming up and I leaned forward to not get anything on my cloths and started throwing up again. I don't know how long it had been but soon I felt another hand on my shoulder again, this time it was Wolf.

I turned away and threw up some more and I could feel his arms going around my stomach making me stand up.

"I can't walk" I told him, I could feel how he lifted me up from the ground and I just put my head against his chest and closed my eyes. "Logan I´m sick" I told him.

"Yeah, no kidding" He said. "Come on little sis let´s get you to the car"

I could feel that he was walking and soon I could hear how a car door opened and how Wolf thanked Crystal for the help and how Crystal told Wolf to call later so she would know I was okay.

Wolf put the seatbelt on me and started to the car.

I was completely out for about half an hour and when I opened my eyes all I could see was a big sign that said John's Coffee Place"

Then the car door opened and Wolf got back into the car, not that I had notes that he was gone, with two big cups that smelled coffee.

"You alive?" He asked and looked at me.

"Barley" I replied pushing myself up so that I could sit a little better. "What time is it?"

"Around eleven forty-five" He told me and gave me one of the big cups with coffee. "Drink this"

I put the cup by my mouth and drank. My stomach was still a mess and my head hurt but I wasn't as lost as I had been at the party, I could control my body and probably walk if I had to. I turned my head to Wolf and saw him looking at me.

"Why did you drink?" He asked. "For fck sakes Juliana you just turned 15"

"It was just punch" I said. "Well I get that it wasn't just punch now, but I thought it was"

"Didn't you smell it?"

"No Dean just gave it to me and I drank it"

"Dean gave you the punch!"

"Yeah so?"

"Julie he knew what was in it" Wolf growled much like dad would.

"But I asked for punch, because I thought it was the only thing without alcohol in it"

"He still shouldn't have given it to ya!"

"Wolf please don't yell" I said and put my left hand on my forehead.

"I´m sorry" He said and sighed. "Drink up, then we are going for a ride, hopefully mom and dad will be asleep when we get home"

I did what he said and finished both of the coffee's, I was still feeling bad so after I had finished the last cup I put my head in Wolf's lap and closed my eyes. I could feel him stroking his hand over my hair telling me about when he was 15 and his buddy's had made him drink. He had felt worse then hell and mom had screamed like never before and dad had forced him to go up at six the day after and work out in the danger-room with him for hours and with the biggest hangover ever and he had gotten grounded for three months and even after that they hadn't start trusting him until now.

"It´s just stupid even if ya are a feral with a healing factor" He told me.

"No kidding" I said in a sleepy voice.

"Yeah well sit up know cause we are going for a long ride and then I´m taking you home little sis"

I fell asleep again after that. I could hear the car stop later on and I could feel how he carried me inside the house. And then I could clearly hear both mom and dad's voices' asking Wolf what the hell was going on.

Wolf hurried to defend both me and himself by telling them that I hadn't known about the alcohol in the punch and that he had thought that I knew. That got him out of the responsibility of not having looked after me like dad asked, but it didn't however explain why he hadn't left the party with me when he first saw the alcohol.

I then heard mom tell Wolf to go to bed and they would talk in the morning, then I felt a shift and I can only guess that Wolf handled me over to dad.

I could feel how mom removed my shoes and my jacket before putting a blanket over me.

"Well now we just have to wait like 3 years before its Kayley" Mom sighed before they left my room.

September 14.

Wolf's POV

When I saw Crystal hurrying over to me I knew something was wrong. Mostly because I could smell how worried she was, I put down the one beer I had been carrying around all night and started to walk to her. She didn't really say that much just that I had to come and quick.

I fallowed her through the house and out the front door, and there by the corner of the house I saw Julie.

She was leaning forward throwing up what must have been everything she had eaten that past week and that didn't smell nice, she was really drunk.

I walked over to her and put my hand on her shoulder to see if you could get any contact with her.

She turned around and looked at me before she turned back to throw up some more, man was she wasted.

"I can't walk" She told me and I picked her up, it´s not like she is very heavy. "Logan I´m sick" She added using my first name.

"Yeah no kidding" I told her. "Come on little sis let´s get you to the car"

I took her to my car and promised Crystal I would call and let her know how Julie was before we took of. I didn't really know what to do, Julie was passed out, I couldn't take her home like this so I just drove around for awhile, then I spotted a coffee place and pulled over.

I went in a bought two big cups of coffee both for Julie, who had come to life when I got back.

I told her to drink the coffee and I asked why the hell she had been drinking. She told me she thought the punch had been the only thing that didn't have alcohol in it and that Dean had given it to her. He is so dead on Monday when I see him.

She felt bad again and laid her head down in my lap, I started stroking her hair and telling her about the first time I had been drinking. That hadn't been fun but I had known what I had been doing, she hadn't, although she should have cheeked what she had been drinking.

But I drank on my on free will and I went home that way, totally drunk. Mom found me on the kitchen floor, yelling at me, but in that state it didn't do me any good, so they put me to bed and waited until the next morning when I was feeling like hell. Mom screamed and that's never good, she can make you feel so guilty, I couldn't even look at her and then there was dad who had me in the danger room until I cried out that I was sorry and that I would never do it again (well not until senior year or collage). Lovely parents huh?

Well we drove home and luckily mom and dad didn't seem so angry with me, beside the fact that I hadn't taken Julie home the second I had seen that alcohol was being served.

This morning at breakfast Julie was no were in sight, couldn't blame her she was probably still in bed.

Mom and dad actually didn't ground me, I just got a lecture and I had to almost swear on the Bible never to let my sister stay at such a party again.

Well not to sound selfish but hey atlist I got of easy…

To be continued…