|A story about nothing
Author: Mrs. A Skywalker PM
The title says it all! It is a Seinfeld crossover story. and its about nothing.Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor/Sci-Fi - Anakin Skywalker - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,829 - Reviews: 6 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 04-18-06 - Published: 11-08-05 - id: 2652628
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
It was a cloudy day on Coruscant, traffic going in each direction was relatively smooth. Obi wan was driving Padme and Dorme home from a meeting at the senatorial rotunda.
Padme looked over her shoulder to Dorme who was sitting in the back seat, "I am sure Anakin will wear it Dorme. And it would look really nice on him. Don't worry."
Dorme shrugged her shoulders and muttered something too low to hear.
Padme looked at Obi wan, "Thank you for the ride home Obi wan."
"No problem whatsoever, my lady. I know Anakin has an appointment with Master Yoda. I am here whenever you guys need assistance. After all I live right across the hall." He gave Padme a charming smile. Obi wan didn't realize that at that moment a speeder quickly swerved into his lane cutting him off.
Dorme screamed, "Look out!"
Obi wan looked ahead and slammed on this breaks. Instinctually, his right arm shot out across Padme's chest protecting her from lunging forward and possibly hitting her head on the dashboard. "Is everyone alright?"
Dorme nodded her head and muttered under her voice.
Padme just nodded uncomfortably and folded her arms in an attempt to protect her chest from being touched again.
Padme and Dorme walked through the door of the apartment to see Anakin watching the pod-racing tournament in the living area. He spoke without turning from the holonet, "Hey ladies, how was your day?"
Dorme mumbled something inaudible. Padme swallowed, "I-It was fine Ani."
Anakin, through the force, could sense that something was wrong. He got up and walked over to Padme, "Angel, what's wrong?"
"Nothing. H-how was your appointment?"
Anakin said, "Yoda taught me a relaxation technique to use when I feel my temper will get out of control. He says I should close my eyes and say the words, 'serenity now'."
"Does it work?"
"I haven't had a reason to try it yet."
Dorme snickered. Anakin glared at her and furled his eyebrows but then he softened and looked back at his wife. "What's wrong Angel? Don't deny it. I can sense something isn't right. Tell me." Anakin's blue eyes bore through her compelling her to spill.
Padme looked away, "Ani, we were almost involved in a car accident."
"Oh, are you both alright?"
"Yes." She sighed.
"But that is not what's bothering you. What is it?" Anakin persisted.
"It was Obi wan -- he - he." She hesitated. Just then Dorme shot her right arm out, demonstrating what Obi wan did.
Anakin's jaw clenched and his breathing became uneven.
"Anakin, don't do anything. Leave Obi wan alone." Padme's pleads went unheeded as Anakin stormed out of the apartment and across the hall. He banged on the door, "Obi wan Kenobi you open this door, now!"
Obi wan opened the door surprised, "What in the name of the --"
"Don't be coy with me, Master." Anakin seethed.
"Well what happened? "
Anakin pointed his gloved finger, "You did the 'stop-short' on my wife!"
"Stop - what? Wh-what are you talking about?" Obi wan gestured curiously.
"The stop- short! I used to do it to Padme all the time when we were dating." Anakin imitated hitting the brakes on a car and shooting his right arm out. "MMMM! I stop short!"
"I assure you Anakin. I did not have any sexual contact with that woman." Obi wan wagged a finger. "It was purely in the interest of keeping her safe."
"I would not cop a feel on your wife Anakin." Obi wan sighed, "That is not my specialty." Obi wan smiled.
Anakin's eyes narrowed and his mouth was wry. He remembered the technique Yoda taught him and closed his eyes, "Serenity now!"
"It's a technique Master Yoda taught me."
"Are you supposed to yell it out?"
"He wasn't specific." Anakin sensed the truth from Obi wan and said, "Alright Obi wan I'll let it slide but I am watching you." He said suspiciously.
Anakin turned and walked back into his apartment.
"Anakin I hope you didn't cause any unnecessary trouble."
"It wasn't unnecessary." He strolled back to the couch and sat down to watch the tournament.
Padme rolled her eyes and went into the bathroom.
Dorme sat down next to Anakin and began muttering.
"Huh?" Anakin looked at her confused.
Dorme looked obviously nervous about what she was saying and continued mumbling.
"I'm sorry Dorme I can't - I don't understand you." Anakin shook his head.
Dorme stopped and sighed. She finally stood up and walked over the easy chair by the window. She picked up a garment bag and showed it to him. She muttered something inaudible.
Anakin sighed. Why can't she speak up! Maybe if I say something she'll go away. Anakin, anxiously wanting to watch the tournament, became annoyed and simply nodded his head. He looked back to the holonet. Dorme walked closer to him and mumbled again.
"Yeah yeah. uh huh." Anakin waved her off. Dorme was so excited she nearly hit the ceiling.
Padme came out of the bathroom. Dorme ran over to her and hugged her.
"Oh Dorme that's great! I told you he would do it" Padme smiled. "You'd better go, you're running late."
Dorme was beaming. She muttered again and ran out of the door.
Anakin looked at the time. "Oh gods, I gotta go. I'm going to be late for the council meeting." He stood up and walked towards the stairs to the bedroom.
"Ani, here take this." She handed him the garment bag.
"Oh, Dorme forgot her bag."
"No she didn't. She brought this for you."
"What?" Anakin was lost.
"She is trying to launch her new clothing line of Jedi apparel. She thought it would be great if you could kind of -- show it off -- to get her name out there. You know, to help her out.
She said you told her you'd do it." Padme opened the garment bag to reveal a cream-colored cotton long sleeve shirt. It had ruffles at the collar and at the cuffs. The shirt also featured puffy sleeves and buttons down the front. It was hideous shirt. "You could wear it under your leather tunic."
Anakin's eyes nearly popped out of his head, "What the hell-"
"Anakin you said you'd wear it." Padme sighed placing her hand on her hip.
"When did I say that?" Anakin pointed at the shirt.
"Just now Anakin. When I was in the bathroom."
"You mean that's when she was talking and --" He remembered her showing him the garment bag and becoming excited when he nodded. "I couldn't hear her! I couldn't understand what she was saying!"
"Oh well." Padme was unsympathic.
"Padme. She is a low talker and you know it!"
"Anakin you promised."
"What! When did --" He took another look at the shirt, "No Jedi in their right mind would wear that!" He sneered, "You'd have better luck with a Sith."
Padme held out the bag and gave him a cold stare. "And pick up a marble rye on your way home."
Anakin caved and took the garment bag, "Fine!" He started his way up the stairs. He sighed deeply and closed his eyes. His teeth were clenched "Serenity now."