Kisame was dozing under a random tree, which one? He couldn't care less.

He was on a random mission with Itachi, and he was tired, so he pestered Itachi until he gave in, letting Kisame sleep for a little while. They had been walking for five days strait.

Itachi was somewhere in the distance, probably blowing holes in a random tree or doing whatever Itachi does when no one else was watching. Itachi was someone who kept everything close to the belt... if he had a belt. Kisame didn't even know what Itachi wore under that Akatsuki coat... not that he was interested in Itachi or anything like that...

Kisame felt a soft, warm breeze fall onto his face, then it got warmer, the breeze was blowing onto his lips, Kisame was only just awake to wonder what the fuck was going on, but not awake enough to do anything about it.

then he felt something warm and soft press onto his lips, a small frown melting onto Kisame's face, he stayed still. not that he was willing to move, he was too comfortable.

then Kisame's mouth was forcefully, but softly opened and something just as warm entered Kisame's mouth.

'what... if that is what i think it is... i'm gonna kill them!' thought Kisame, the frown getting deeper.

the thing frequently brushed against Kisame's tongue and explored his mouth, kisame's bloodthirsty and curious sides shook hands and decided on a truce, wanting to know what the hell is going on, and if possible, kill whoever is doing it.

Kisame's eyes slowly opened, his world blurry at first, then getting sharper.

Kisame practically choked.

two blood-red eyes were looking at him, three, small, black, comma-like marks in each eye.

Itachi.

before Kisame knew what he was doing, he launched himself backwards and away from his red-eyed companion.

"WHAT THE HELL, ITACHI-SAN!" screeched Kisame when he was far enough away from the young man to make him slightly comfortable... though, Itachi was quick on his feet.

Itachi hadn't moved much, he was just kneeling next to where Kisame was sleeping before, his long, black bangs tucked behind his ears and his sharingan eyes utterly empty.

"you should be asleep." he said quietly.

Kisame could've fallen over... if he wasn't already on the ground.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN BY THAT!" shouted Kisame, staring at Itachi as though he had just sprouted a tail and pointy furry ears, like his name suggests.

"i mean, you should be asleep." Itachi repeated simply, staying where he is, just incase Kisame gets any rash ideas.

"... what were you doing?" asked Kisame, determinedly keeping his voice even.

Itachi kept silent, his eyes fixed on Kisame and his body not showing any signs on moving.

"YOU WERE FRIGGIN' KISSING ME, ITACHI-SAN!" Kisame screamed, his face getting a little flushed.

Itachi flinched slightly, the whole country didn't have to know...

Itachi thought of a few ways he could make Kisame stop shouting... a few mental images of him keeping Kisame's mouth busy with other things, swirling around in his head.

Itachi felt his cheeks start to burn and closed his eyes, shaking his head slightly to rid him of the tempting images to possibly come.

kisame was very concerned about his team mates' sanity.

'Itachi-san can't be gay... h-he... just can't be!... UCHIHA Itachi! he's a bloody Uchiha! one of the most noble clans to ever exist... i think... but... that little brother of his... he was gay... i coulda sworn he was after kitsune!'

while Kisame was thinking this through in his head, Itachi had noticed a soft spot and stood up.

bad idea.

Kisame was immediately standing up and holding his Samehada, ready to attack.

"don't come near me!" Kisame shouted, not wanting to hurt Itachi, but not wanting to find out what he was going to do to him.

Itachi's red eyes narrowed slightly.

"you can't hurt me... Kisame." he breathed, his voice not lathered with venom, or even bloodlust. it was tinted with... teasing!

Kisame had never heard Itachi speak like that. his stance dropped slightly and stared at the young man standing in front of him. and that, brought something else to Kisame's attention.

Itachi was smiling.

not that i'm-so-sexy-and-i'm-about-to-kill-you-for-the-fun-of-it smirk... but a real smile!

okay. now Kisame was petrified.

"w-what are you smiling about!" stammered Kisame, the grip on samehada getting tighter.

"nothing." Itachi said simply. the smile continuing to creep his teammate out.

Kisame's hands jerked for some reason and he looked at them.

"...shit!"

samehada had disappeared.

Kisame snapped his eyes back to Itachi and he was now beyond petrified.

"you should keep a firmer grip on your possessions..." breathed Itachi, holding Samehada at his side.

Kisame staggered a few paces backwards, away from Itachi.

"calm down, Kisame. it won't hurt... much..." the young man breathed, taking a few steps toward his severely creeped out teammate, dropping samehada to the ground.

"what do you mean?" asked Kisame as he backed into a tree trunk as his hands started shaking.

Itachi advanced to Kisame until he was only a few inches away from him.

"i don't know if it'll hurt... none's done it to me, yet." he breathed, his voice now barely audible.

Kisame was off the scale of petrified. his eyes were wide and his hands were shaking. this had never happened before. he had never been this scared, that he could remember.

Itachi raised his hands and Kisame instantly closed his eyes tightly and pressed his back against the tree to try to get further away from Itachi.

pop.

pop.

'huh?'

pop.

pop.

Kisame snapped his eyes open and looked at Itachi.

pop.

Itachi was unbuttoning Kisame's coat. each time, the press studs popped loudly.

Itachi knelt at Kisame's feet and continued to unbutton his team mates' coat.

"umm... what are you doing?" asked Kisame, he wasn't petrified any more, he was just plain curious.

"i'm unbuttoning your coat. what does it look like?" asked Itachi, standing back up and looking at Kisame blankly.

Kisame was now VERY concerned about his team mates' sanity.

Itachi raised his hands again and started to unbutton Kisame's shirt.

"woah! woah. woah. woah!" Kisame squeaked, grabbing Itachi's wrists to stop him.

"what the hell do you think you're d-"

before Kisame could say anything else, Itachi was suddenly nibbling at his lip.

Kisame was frozen.

when his brain had decided to work again, he yanked his head back. fast. but i doing so, hitting his head on the tree he was backed into.

"ITAI! ... dammit..." Kisame mumbled, tensing his shoulders as the pain throbs in the back of his head, closing his eyes and ignoring the little stars flying around.

'dammit... my he-what the...?' thought Kisame, feeling something trying to eat his neck.

Kisame opened his eyes to see himself looking down at someone's dark black hair.

'the only person i know with hair like that is- OMFG!'

"GEDDOFF! GEDDOFF!" Kisame shrieked, letting go of Itachi's wrists and pushing at his shoulders.

"no." a soft rumble said, near Kisame's chest.

Itachi's hands gripping Kisame's shirt so he won't move.

"why the hell not!" growled Kisame, gritting his teeth as he felt Itachi's tongue slide up and down his neck. Kisame decided to grip Itachi's shoulders, either to keep him anchored to this world or to stop him punching his teammate.

"because i don't want to." purred Itachi.

Kisame's grip tightened.

'dammit... i'll kill him when i get out of this... i swear! i'll-ooh... just there... just there...'

a small groan slipped past Kisame's lips as Itachi's tongue brushed past a certain spot just under Kisame's jaw line.

Itachi stopped for a moment.

"having fun...?"

"no."

"your body language doesn't agree with you, Kisame."

"what do you care, Itachi-san!"

Itachi raised his gaze to Kisame's eyes, his lips still touching his team mates' neck.

"there are things a still care about..." he said quietly.

"sure." Kisame said shortly.

Itachi sent a half-hearted glare at Kisame and turned back to his team mates' neck. trying to remember where his tongue passed over when Kisame groaned.

"why are you doing this anyw-nnnnh!" groaned Kisame, itachi had found the spot and was making delicate designs on it with his tongue.

Kisame felt like he was melting. his hands loosening on Itachi's shoulders and tilting his head up so Itachi can get at the spot more easily. his eyes drifting closed and small, longing groans slipping from his lips.

Itachi felt mildly pleased with himself. he found the initiative to start unbuttoning Kisame's shirt again, since his teammate seemed too distracted to do anything about it.

many sides of Kisame's brain were arguing with each other.

'he's doing this to annoy us! KILL HIM!' shrieked his bloodthirsty side.

'but... it feels so goooood' moaned kisame's innocent side.

'i have to agree... it does feel nice... but why is he doing this!' asked his inquisitive side.

'KILL HIM! ANNOYANCE! I AM THE STRONGEST!'

'but... it feels nice...'

'i'm aware of that... but... why is he doing it?'

'soooo nice...'

'KILL THEM ALL!'

"kisame...?"

"huh!" squeaked Kisame, his eyes snapping open to find Itachi standing in front of him, Itachi's hands on Kisame's bare chest.

"... you're blushing..."

Kisame's eyes widened.

"n-No i'm not!"

"yes, you are... your cheeks are all pink..."

Kisame's cheeks burnt with humiliation.

"i'm not blushi-!"

before Kisame could finish his sentence, he had been pulled to the ground and pinned down.

"I-Itachi-san! what are you doing!" squeaked Kisame, struggling.

funny how such a light-looking guy can seem so heavy when he's pinning you on the ground.

"having some fun." Itachi said simply, tightening his grip on Kisame's wrists and looking him strait in the eye.

"what do you mean by that?"

"you'll see."

kisame hated surprises...

Itachi lifted himself off Kisame and sat on his teammates stomach, still holding his wrists.

Kisame watched, knowing he couldn't get out from under him easily.

Itachi somehow formed a few seals and Kisame was suddenly tied to the ground.

"H-HEY! WHAT ARE YOU-!"

"shh." Itachi breathed, straitening up, releasing his team mates' wrists and looking at him. "just be quiet, and you'll find out what i'm going to do."

"i. don't. want. to. know. that. late." Kisame hissed though his teeth.

Itachi cocked an eyebrow.

"well, you'll have to." Itachi sighed, crawling down Kisame's body.

"ch-chotto matte!"

"hmm?" asked Itachi casually as he knelt in-between Kisame's tied legs and placed a hand on his teammates' belt buckle.

"... you said it wasn't going to hurt..."

Itachi chuckled.

"well, i don't know if it'll hurt, but i won't use my teeth. okay?" not waiting for an answer, Itachi turned back to Kisame's belt and undid it.

"...i knew i'd regret it..." Kisame moaned to himself.

Itachi's hands stopped.

"...what do you mean...?" Itachi asked, looking up at Kisame's face.

Kisame refused to answer.

Itachi sighed and brushed a hand against Kisame's crotch.

"nuuuhnnnn!" Kisame groaned, biting his lip and feeling his back arch slightly.

"what do you mean, Kisame?" asked Itachi again.

"...i-i'm not going to say..." said Kisame stubbornly, breathing slowly becoming gasps and sweating slightly.

"... i've got the upper hand here... answer me." hissed Itachi, brushing a hand against Kisame's crotch once again, but putting a little more force into it this time.

Kisame felt blood seep from his bitten lip as he groaned.

"...not... saying..." Kisame finally moaned, his face becoming flushed.

Itachi sighed and undid Kisame's pants.

"why do you have to be so stubborn?" Itachi sulked.

Kisame stopped and blinked, staring at the young man in-between his legs.

"... i've never heard you so sulky before, Itachi-san."

Itachi shrugged and crawled back onto Kisame chest, his nose nearly touching Kisame's.

"there's a first for everything... now... are you going to tell me what you knew you were going to regret?" asked Itachi, his sharingan shimmering and one of his legs in-between Kisame's.

"no." Kisame said shortly.

Itachi sighed and brushed his leg against Kisame's crotch, with more force than before.

Kisame did his best to hold back the loud moan, but he failed.

Itachi's eyebrows raised slightly as he heard the noise Kisame made, feeling a jolt somewhere in his pants.

"... tell me. Kisame..." Itachi purred seductively, he had never used this voice before, but he still had it in him.

"... i..." groaned Kisame, as though he couldn't help telling Itachi. "...i..."

Itachi nibbled at Kisame's neck as though helping Kisame to remember how to speak.

"...i knew being attracted to you was a bad idea..."

Itachi stopped, his eyes moderately wide.

"... you...?"

Kisame groaned agreeably, his eyes half open.

"... you do act like a girl sometimes, though."

Itachi was suddenly sitting on Kisame's stomach, glaring at Kisame with all the murderous intent he had.

"what is that supposed to mean!"

"it means..." Kisame breathed, not fazed at all by Itachi's change of attitude. "that you're my kind of guy."

Itachi blinked. "...pardon?"

Kisame groaned and shifted slightly under Itachi's weight.

"just c'mere and i'll prove it." he said, motioning for Itachi to come closer with a subtle head movement.

Itachi shifted, lay down on Kisame's chest and moved so his nose was just above Kisame's, once again.

"what are yo-"

Itachi couldn't finish his sentence... his lips were locked with Kisame's.

Itachi groaned into the kiss, opening his mouth and letting Kisame's tongue in.

Itachi's lungs felt like they were burning.

'need to breathe! need to breathe!'

Itachi reluctantly broke the kiss and gasped for breath, his eyes still closed.

"heh. who's the uke now...?"

Itachi's eyes snapped open, staring at the smug smirk he earned from Kisame.

"you are. you're the one tied to the ground..." Itachi said casually.

"am not! you're the one who- ... what are you doing?"

Itachi was crawling back down Kisame's body.

"doing what i wanted to do in the first place." Itachi said, gripping Kisame's pants.

"...which is...?"

Itachi looked at Kisame meaningfully.

"okay. okay." sighed Kisame, lifting his hips up slightly and feeling his pants slide down.

Kisame said bolt upright, his eyes wide.

Itachi looked at Kisame, he was sitting on the tree above the flustered shark. "... what's wrong?"

"oh... n-nothing. just a dream." mumbled Kisame, not looking at Itachi and scrubbing at one of his pink and burning cheeks with a hand.

"you sure...? you're all flushed..." breathed Itachi.

"what was the dream about?"

Kisame's cheeks, if possible, went pinker.

"uhh... you dun wanna know..." Kisame mumbled, looking at his knees.

"... sure, i do." Itachi said calmly, jumping down from his tree gracefully and landing beside Kisame.

"n-no... you don't. you'll be sick." Kisame said, still not looking at Itachi.

"try me."

Kisame saw so many perverted thoughts at those two words.

"uhh... no thanks..."

"... what!"

Kisame reluctantly looked at Itachi, Itachi looking politely confused.

Itachi sighed and let the expression slip from his face. "just tell me."

Kisame felt his cheeks burn again.

"uhh... okay... umm... you kissed me a few times... the you tied my to the ground... you untied my pants... i kissed you... then you raped me..." Kisame said, feeling like his face was on fire from all the blushing, and trying to not sound like he had enjoyed his dream.

" . . . "

Kisame quickly looked at Itachi, just in case he had offended his teammate.

Itachi was looking at Kisame with an expression that Kisame couldn't read.

Kisame was surprised Itachi hadn't shouted at him yet.

Itachi stood up and looked at Kisame, who was still sitting on the ground.

Itachi now had one of those 'i know more, than you know'' looks.

"what is it, Itachi-san?"

Itachi chuckled and leant down, his nose close to Kisame and their breaths mingling.

Kisame frose.

Itachi smirked and pressed his lips softly onto Kisame's.

"... you can't rape the willing."