Chapter 15

(Surprise! Another random appearance from HobbesLuigi82!)

A/N:

- Thanks a whole bunch to HobbesLuigi82 for writing this first scene with me! (And you all thought he was gone for good. Mwa ha ha, you were fooled!)

- I know this has taken me A RIDICULOUS amount of time to get updated - but I finally have an idea to change this whole story around! (Thanks for waiting!)

- Oh, and a special mention to one of friends from my forum: Tsukikari Kitsune, who naturally, provided a little inspiration for this chapter... (You'll see...)

As always, enjoy this unenviable piece of FFN trash.

- Dixie

"...Uh... Uh..." Dixie stammered, her eyes widening in fear at the sight of her two former judging partners, standing over her - clutching her firmly by the collar.

She gulped slowly; noticing a small troop of rough-looking contestants entering through the double doors - all of them looking furious, at their eviction punishments.

A very bedraggled-looking Rathe caught Dixie's eyes and locked them.

"You might want to increase the dosage next person you use that needle trick on." - He growled.

"...Umm... Uh..." Dixie stuttered, nervously twiddling her fingers - noticing that everyone within the room was casting her a menacing glare.

"So much witty backchat without a second thought - then you just crumble at the slightest possibility of any harm to yourself." Simon sneered. "What should we do, gang?"

"Punish her!" - Everyone yelled simultaneously.

"...Uh oh..." Dixie whimpered, feeling herself be tugged down from the desk - as if she were a trophy being presented by two tribesmen.

"Where'd the soil-sucking son of a bitch 'winner' go?" Simon yelled, at the bruised and beaten army of rejected contestants.

"He's right here..." Goombella mumbled - before she, and many others - were plastered against the doorframe, as Petey Piranha came storming into the room at his mention.

"Peee-teyyyy!" Rathe called, while pointing at Dixie - as though trying to cajole a dog into playing with a toy. "Friend, Petey! Pukey on friend!"

"...Uh!" Dixie yelped, attempting to struggle free. "...What?"

"Oh, come on, seriously…" - Rathe rationalised.

"I think that compared to a five-inch horse tranq' in the spine, a little sicky from a flying plant really is being generous in the revenge stakes!"

"No!" Dixie wailed, furiously flailing her legs - as both Rathe and Simon had her firmly restrained between them.

Petey stepped forward, flashing a toothy grin in her direction.

"There, there, Dixie," Simon smiled. "Can't be that bad - looks like he likes you; maybe he'll be easier on you!"

"Actually; when a Piranha smiles at you, that's just their way of preparing for their waste regurgitation upon their prey." Waluigi snickered from the back row - his arms and torso now covered with bandages, covering the snake bites.

"Ah, well, won't be me worrying over it." Rathe grinned. "Actually, we're right on plan."

"No-!" Dixie cried. "These things always happen to me!"

"We all have moments like that, I'm sure - you didn't give us any time to mope before being stuck like lab rats." Simon snapped back. "Right - someone drag Petey over here - STAT!"

Eagerly responding to the call; several of the rejected contestants all assembled behind the enormous Piranha, and began shoving him from behind in the direction of his new victim.

"Wow." Rathe said, watching the semi-tug-of-war commence between the plant and the angry throng of participants. "Must be a bugger to feed himself."

"Petey! Here boy; fresh meat!" Simon whistled, attempting to coax the monster over to where Dixie stood.

His head snapping up suddenly at the mention of meat, Petey bounded up and down happily for a moment, knocking aside a few battered contestants, before making for his prey.

"N-N-No! ...D-Don't eat me!" Dixie wailed, tears of terror filling her eyes.

"Aww, how cute!" Simon observed. "Pitiful yelps of terror make him happy!"

Simon was right - Petey was jumping up and down at an alarming rate, causing a small tremor rumbling through the room.

"Now, come on…" Rathe said, pointing at the bouncing plant. "Don't get too excited, or you'll make yourself-"

"BLAAAAARGHH!"

"…Sick..."

"...Augh...!"

From beneath the mountain of thickened internal slop - Dixie gave a quiet whimper of disgust; her whole body totally immersed in the abhorrent gastronomic catastrophe. The spectators simultaneously groaned in disgust, taking several steps backwards, away from the sticky sludge.

"Aaaaack!" Rathe choked, clasping his hands around his nose. "Eeeesh! And I thought that slimy stuff they used on You Can't Do That On Television was icky! Gross…"

"...Eww..." Dixie sobbed, shakily smearing away the clumps of vomit that coated her face, enabling her to see through the sticky gunk that covered her from head to toe.

"Ugh." Yoshi spat, somehow getting up the courage to poke Dixie's shoulder.

"Oh, NO! It's all mushy! Ick!" He stared at the dash of fluid smeared on his finger, before, giving it a quick lick.

"ACK! - That was a bad idea…!" - He added, dashing out of the room as fast as his waddly little legs would take him.

Dixie shuddered, feeling the thick, warm clumps rolling down her face, dripping down her chin, and sliding down her neck.

"...I'll never ever eat... Durians and Pokeys... Again..." She grimaced, weakly attempting to sluice the slime away from herself.

"Arghh, you got what you deserved." Rathe said, tilting his head madly; each time, a nasty crack ringing in his skull. "My neck still aches like fuck - I hope you're happy."

Dixie sniffled weakly, hauling herself up onto her feet - her shoes making loud and sickening squelching sounds upon the damp carpet; as she began trudging over to the doors in disgrace.

"I suppose it would be inappropriate to make a snide one-liner, now, would it?" Simon asked, seemingly to no-one in particular.

"Do what you like." Rathe replied half-heartedly, slapping his back. "Is there a Reconstructive Urologist anywhere in this damn place? Geez!"

"I hope you're happy; fucking BASTARDS." Dixie hissed, her eyes narrowed - as she slammed the door behind her.

"Count your blessings, dearie!" Rathe shouted back. "HE WASN'T HUNGRY, WAS HE?"

"I regret nothing - I'm outta here. Simon, you got that phone book at Doctors…?"

"…That was absolute torture." Peach moaned, throwing herself down angrily upon a couch set aside upon the sidelines.

"I concur." Goombruno grumbled, sitting down beside her, glaring our over the board. "I think you all better sober up soon… It's getting late."

"Eh, don't be such a naaaaag." Boshi mocked him, wolfing down a handful of nachos he'd grabbed from the snacks table.

"Yeah…" Mario growled, stepping in front of him. "This is MY party… I made the board… I provided the drinks… I make the rules."

"Sit down Mario." Peach sighed, shaking her head in despair. "After this fiasco, I don't ever want to go to another Mario Party again."

"You can't say that!" Luigi gasped, dropping his fistful of mini chipolatas in shock. "Mario Party is an upheld tradition! We have one every year!"

"…Well, for the past eight years, yes." Peach snapped, suddenly standing up. "But… You know what they say: all traditions die out."

"…And who exactly said that?" Bowser sniggered, helping himself to a large helping of strawberry cheesecake. "I think Peach is just making up her own proverbs here."

"Well what now…?" Daisy mumbled, glancing around awkwardly. "Fly-Guy's gone… Who's going to navigate us around the board?"

"Quite a predicament you all appear to be in…"

"…! …Who said that!" Daisy yelped, holding onto Luigi's shoulder in fear - causing him to drop his second fistful of chipolatas. Luigi was beginning to get very annoyed at the loss of his precious pork products.

"This fan fiction lacks structure and organisation, and has done for the past fourteen chapters."

"…What the fuck is that loudspeaker talking about?" Bowser yelled, waving his fist in the air. "You say we're the pissed ones, you're the one ranting on about-"

"Silence!"

Bowser let out a sudden squeal, as he felt his legs give out from underneath him, and he tumbled flat on his face into his plate of cheesecake.

"…What the hell happened there?"

"Bowser!" Bowser Jr. shrieked, hopping desperately over to his father's fallen body. "Did you slip, daddy?"

Bowser groaned, furiously wiping his scaly face clean with a swipe of his colossal paw.

"…No, I didn't slip… Something happened to my legs."

"…Yes. I think you can see the extent of my power now."

"…Who… W-Who are you?" Peach whimpered, glancing around the silenced room nervously, hoping to find the source of the echoing voice that was being projected into the room.

"Turn your attention to yonder monitor."

All of the guests did as they were told; turning their head in the direction of the far east wall, where a huge monitor screen was protruding from the wall.

The screen became illuminated with a dim red light - and the mysterious shapes upon it took the form of a large black chair.

Seated in it was a dark and sallow figure, their face dimmed out by a cloak of shadow. All that could be seen of them was a pair of very pale hands with short fingernails, and blood present around their knuckles. They appeared to be cradling and stroking something that was seated upon the figure's lap.

Amongst the cavernous shadow in the centre of the seat - a single red light glinted on and off.

"Ah… That's better. I apologize for the light quality. This web-cam is only a shitty Labtec; it won't work without a high-density beam in front of it."

"…Who are you?" Daisy asked, trembling - as she continued to clutch onto Luigi's shoulder - Luigi, slowly munching upon his chipolata sausages, though slower than he normally would.

"…I'm going to send an accomplice of mine down to your board… Or should I say… MY board."

"Hey, wait you!" - Mario cut in, "I made this board! It's not yours, it's mi-"

Mario was stopped by a large strip of duct tape suddenly being plastered over his mouth. Simultaneously, his feet were bound together by a coarse piece of rope - which then proceeded to drag him across the floor, writhing helplessly, as he approached the board.

The board had been plunged completely into darkness; not a single neon light bulb was left flickering, nor was a single blue square left illuminated.

"…Now, witness the change..."

Screaming, the guests were blinded by a rush of intoxicating green light - as the board that once stood before them combusted in a sudden rush of intense flames, licking at the ceiling and sending forth avalanches of smouldering ashes into their terrified faces.

From the engulfing black smoke that billowed around the explosion site rose several charred black oak trees - huge cages hanging down from their immense branches. The blue and red squares that once lined a pathway through Mario's old board were slowly replaced by a cold, concrete walkway, lined on both sides by bubbling orange geysers, emitting unbearable heat.

Mario appeared in the centre of the board, hanging from the top of a large guillotine, which overlooked a deep pit of bubbling lava, dug deep into the foul ground of this hellish new board.

Mario's wails of terror were silenced by his gag, as he noticed his head was hanging several feet above a fiery fate.

"…Alright!" Peach wailed, throwing herself to the ground. "We… We can see your power! …Please let Mario go!"

"…Ha ha ha… I'm glad that you insignificant peons finally see my way of reasoning. I will send my accomplice down to the board… He will free Mario… And he will give you your next set of instructions."

The monitor screen turned blank - leaving nothing but a chilling air of confusion about the bewildered and petrified guests.

"Aaaaaah! What is THAT?"

The other surprised guests turned their attention gingerly to the direction that a wailing Peach was pointing to.

Scurrying rapidly along the board was a large, furry creature, with erected ears, bright green eyes, bushy blonde fur - and seven long tails. It let out a rapid, high-pitched melody as it ran, its four paws bounding heavily along the pathway running through the board.

When this strange creature reached the crowd of guests, it perched itself upon a table, letting its seven tails dangle over the edge.

"Greetings peons." He said, flashing a toothy grin at them all - showing off four dangerous-looking incisors.

"Uh… Hi?" Daisy mumbled weakly - spreading her fingers in an-almost delicate royal wave; despite her palms being disgustingly sweaty.

"I am Kitsune. - K-i-t-s-u-n-e." Kitsune grinned, his eyes shimmering in excitement as he witnessed the fine array of fresh meat laid out before him - all dressed in smart garnishes, and possessing a sweet aroma of rum and brandy marinade.

"I was sent by the Agony to lead to you your doom!" - Kitsune suddenly let out a high-pitched cackle, causing everybody to grimace and hold their hands to their ears.

"The Agony…?" Luigi asked, placing his head on one side.

"That is correct, green peon. The Agony of March - as is their full title." Kitsune smirked, speaking his master's title with an air of superiority.

"But… But it's July!" Toadette exclaimed, sounding confused.

Kitsune smiled, despite looking slightly sickened at Toadette's childish innocence. "…Ah, The Agony doesn't just have supreme control over the month of March… The Agony has control over this entire millennium!"

"Um… Not to be disrespectful, Kitsune - but, can you get to the point?" Bowser muttered gruffly, folding his arms.

"Very well then, fat spiky peon." Kitsune sniggered, shaking his head slightly in despair.

"The Agony now has you all under their control… You are their peons. You will brave this new party board - designed by The Agony - and you will prove yourselves worthy of the task. All those who fail the tasks that are set for you along the way by The Agony… You will be held captive in the holding cells… And you will become the new slaves…"

"UNLESS…! Unless, one of you can brave the fortress that lies at the end of this board, and defeat The Agony."

Kitsune shook his head. "Of course, none of you are up to the task. The tasks ahead of you will test your mind, your wit, your willpower. They will snap every bend of courage within you, crush every ounce of confidence you possess… And will even test your everlasting fear of death…"

"Somebody has company for the number one super-villain title." Wario sniggered, nudging Bowser in the ribs.

Bowser growled furiously, puffing out his chest - squaring up to Kitsune.

"…If this Agony thinks he can outdo Bowser at the number one villain title… He can think again! I am Bowser, and I'm not afraid of some flashy fire sprinklers and dark monitors!"

"…Ah, we will see." Kitsune smiled, raising his eyebrows calmly in response to Bowser's threat.

"…First… You must hand in all personal belongings… And remove all of your clothes." Kitsune ordered, standing upright on the table, narrowing his eyes at the guests stood before him.

"WHAT?" Waluigi yelped, sounding extremely offended. "We have to fight this Agony thing naked!"

Kitsune grimaced; getting a mental image of both Wario and Waluigi standing nude together.

"Of course not, lanky peon. You will each be provided with your own suited outfit… Specially designed for the tasks you will face. The ladies in the high heels will thank me." Kitsune snickered.

"…Oh, if this is a prank Mario - I swear…" - Peach grumbled, pulling her regal dress up over her head, carefully folding it up, and placing it in a neat pile beside her shoes, earrings, gloves and crown.

"I don't think Mario would go to this much trouble just for a joke, Peach." Daisy whispered, as she began adorning herself with the new garments Kitsune had presented them all with.

All twenty-four of them were now required to wear a full jumpsuit - black in colour, with red kneepads, elbow pads, and a lightweight helmet. Each one also had to dress themselves with a pair of baseball sneakers and wrap a digital wristwatch around their wrists.

In their jumpsuit pockets, each new 'peon' also carried a torch, a packet of glucose tablets, a box of matches, a mouth-guard and a pocket-knife.

"…Oh… Bro'… This looks to be painful." Luigi gulped - tugging his helmet down over his head, replacing his trusty green cap which he had worn before.

"…What do we need drugs for, anyway?" Wario asked, peering curiously at the tablets he'd pulled from his pocket.

"Agony will not be providing you with any food just yet…" Kitsune grinned. "You will only be granted food upon completing special arrangements. You may need more energy than you'll possess for certain tasks - so the glucose capsules are there for your own comfort."

"NO FOOD?" Wario screamed, suddenly feeling his gut gnawing upon itself as it heard those two words.

"I apologise, chubby peon." Kitsune giggled. "But, I too, am just a peon to the Agony."

"…Does that mean we can call you 'furry peon'?" Daisy asked, with a weak smile.

Kitsune grinned, his eyes sparkling.

"No."