A/N: Yay for Rent! I started listening to the broadway soundtrack just this past summer, and fell in love with the music and characters. I finally decided that I would write a fanfic, though I am hesitant to do so. Please review, as I have some 40 pages of this done so far and would like to post it, but I won't unless if I get reviews. :)

Notes: Yes, this will be an eventual Mark/Roger story. A little Roger/Mimi, too. I also would like to note that I absolutely love Mimi, and that I am not just getting her out of the picture so that Roger and Mark can get together, no matter how tempting it may be. XD

Disclaimer: RENT belongs to Jonathen Larson

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I look up slowly from my guitar after hearing a soft ‘thump’, not wanting to believe what I already know. The door is outlined in bright light that flickers on and off. Darkness is obscuring some of the light at the bottom of the door. Mimi has finally come home.

I stand up and walk to the door, hearing Mimi as she fumbles for her keys, quietly cursing when she can’t find them. I open the door and Mimi falls into me. She must have been leaning up against it.

“Oof! Oh, hey Rog,” she smiles lazily up into my face, and I help her stand up.

“Mimi, where were you?” I ask, though I don’t need to. I already know the answer. I shut the door behind her and sit down with my guitar again, plucking out a few chords as I wait for her to reply.

“Why do you always haveta ask that, Rog?” she asks innocently, pursing her lips. I reach over and grab her arm, pulling her close to me as I roll up her sleeve. Track marks line her dark skin. I glance up at her eyes and swear under my breath. Her pupils are constricted.

“Why?” I whisper, pulling Mimi closely to my body in a tight embrace. “Jesus, Mimi! Every night you come home high. Every night I wait up for you, hoping that maybe you decided not to get fucked up tonight…maybe she won’t get fucked up tonight… I can’t stand to see you like this! You’re killing yourself!” Mimi looks up into my face, scowling, before she pulls herself sharply away from me.

“Oh, and who are you to lecture me, Roger?” she hisses, standing back and spreading her arms apart in a weary gesture. “You think that you’re so perfect now that you’re off drugs? You’re always trying to tell me what to do, what not to do. I don’t need a mother, Rog, I need a boyfriend! Someone who cares for me and will stand with me, even if I do have my faults.”

“I can’t help but worry about you, Mimi! Look at yourself! You’re a mess! I don’t even know where you are half the time. I can’t remember a time when you actually were with me for more than an hour, much less a time when you weren’t high,” I plead desperately, leaning my guitar up against the wall as I stand up.

“There you go, making me out to be some worthless junkie again! What happened, Rog? You used to love me. You used to love me for who I am, not what I do.” Mimi sounds desperate as she comes closer to me. I can tell she’s falling asleep on her feet, and that her thoughts are clouded with drug induced weariness.

“No, Mimi. I could never love you for who you are,” I regret the words as soon as they slip out of my mouth, and I see Mimi’s eyes look at me imploringly, asking me to reassure her that what I have just said is a lie. I wish it were. I try desperately to help her understand, but my harsh words have already done their damage. She’ll never forgive me. “I can’t love you until you stop using drugs! I can help you, let me help. Please, baby, I want to help you, but I can’t when you push me away.” My hands begin to shake. I hate that. Whenever I get upset my hands shake. I shove them deeply into my pockets, hoping that she won’t notice. She stands still, staring up at me with hazy eyes that are brimmed with tears. Slowly, she walks towards me and I take my hands out of my pockets again to wrap my arms around her. I feel her fingers gripping my baggy sweater tightly, her fists pushed against my chest.

“I’m scared,” she whispers, and I soothe her, whispering words of encouragement, telling her she’ll get better. That I’ll help her.

I pull slowly away from her and kiss her lightly on the forehead, moving my mouth to her lips and I kiss her again. She doesn’t return the kiss, but instead begins to shiver. I lead her to the bed and lay her down, pulling the blanket over her small frame before lying down next to her. She clings to my body, shivering until her breathing becomes steady and she finally falls asleep. I sigh and wrap my arms around her more tightly, curling her soft hair around one of my fingers as I too slowly drift off to sleep.