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"And the little one said 'Roll over!'"
Light sighed happily.
If there was one thing he loved about hotels, it was that the beds were so big. So much room to roll around in, so much duvet to bury himself under and forget all the annoyances of life.
Which is why he pretended not to hear the knocking at the door the first few times. After the fifth, he ripped the covers off and stormed towards the door.
"WHAT!" he screeched. Misa blinked innocently.
"Liiight!" she squealed, "Misa is supposed to share this room with you! Yay!" Light merely looked horrified, before running back towards the bed to make sure he had the middle at least.
He shut his eyes tightly and tried to pretend Misa wasn't there, while she crawled into the bed cooing and snuggling up to him.
Just as he had managed to faze her out completely, another knocking came at the door.
"Not answering it!" Light snapped, so Misa skipped towards the door in her black pyjamas.
She opened the door to a timid looking L.
"Um…I'm extremely sorry to disturb," he began politely, "but the hotel messed up. See you two were meant to have a double room and give me a single room, but instead you got a huge room and they didn't give me anything. Therefore I will be joining you tonight."
Light could have shot him in the head there and then. Misa narrowed her eyes.
"But where will Ryuuzaki sleep?" Misa asked. L pointed towards the bed nervously.
Light gritted his teeth. "Don't worry Misaaa…" he hissed, "there's plenty of room…"
Misa pouted and gave in. L clambered into bed in the same clothes he always wore.
"Wow, this bed really is comfort-" L was broken off by Light slapping a hand in front of his mouth.
"It's bad enough I have to share a bed with two people, please stop talking and let me sleep," he growled. L complied and continued to stare at the ceiling.
Until there was another knock. "NOT ANSWERING IT!" Light yelled. L stood up and went to the door.
"Who is it?" he said quietly.
"It's Watari, let me in!"
L and Misa groaned as Watari explained he was also meant to be sharing this room.
"Can't you sleep on the sofa?" Misa pleaded. Watari chuckled.
"An old man like me couldn't do that, it would hurt my back too much!" L looked mildly uncomfortable as Watari got in to the bed next to him. L ignored Light's previous request for him to shut up and began to make conversation with Watari comparing the weather of Japan with that of England, with references to the Norweigan climate. Misa was mostly confused by the whole conversation and said nothing, choosing to inch closer and closer to Light.
Light decided to think happy thoughts. Happy happy thoughts. Of killing L and Misa and Watari. With...forks…or bad music…or the stench of Ryuk's collection of mouldy apple cores…
Speak of the devil.
Light nearly screamed when he saw Ryuk walk in through the wall grinning, but kept himself from swearing at the God of Death when he remembered L and Watari were there and couldn't see the shinigami.
"Can I join in with this sleepover too?" he giggled. Misa promptly took up the remaining room on the left side of the bed so he couldn't fit next to her. Shinigami breath was something she would never learn to deal with.
Ryuk grumbled and lay across the bottom of the bed at everyones feet. Light and Misa instinctively drew their feet closer towards them.
"OW!" L yelled, "What the hell just fell on my feet?" Ryuk looked mildly amused, but still didn't move from his place. Light glared at Ryuk.
"What are you talking about, there's nothing there" Light lied.
"I can't move my foot!" L hissed back at him.
"Perhaps you should see a doctor about it," Light drawled, and turned to face Misa again.
And instead of seeing just Misa and the wall behind her, he saw Misa and a wall with half a white shinigami through it. Remu smiled pleasantly at them all.
Light looked horrified. As if one shinigami wanting to share your bed wasn't bad enough. Misa snuggled closer to Light to make room for Remu.
"HEY, why does she get to sleep there and I have to sleep at everyones feet?" Ryuk yelled.
"Because I don't smell like mouldy apples," Remu stuck her tongue out at Ryuk. Light was mildly shocked that her tongue was blue, but quickly regained his composure. L was starting to notice his odd expressions.
"Couldn't you two move up a bit?" L asked, "You're not using all that space next to Misa."
Misa glanced at Remu, "Um…Misa needs lots of space! Because…because Misa is a girl!" she nodded earnestly.
Light inwardly groaned. Of all the stupid excuses…
"AH! I see!" L said understandingly. Light looked at him.
"How much do you know about girls, Ryuuzaki?"
"Uh…I think we should all go to sleep now, don't you Light?" L covered quickly. Watari obligingly turned off the lamp next to him.
Ryuk stretched his legs out and hit Light's knee with his foot, who swore under his breath that he had to get the one shinigami that wore high heels. This was going to be a long night.
"Hey! Who stroked my arm!" L said suddenly.
"Not me," said Light.
"Misa is too far away."
"WATARI! Really, that is SO improper!" he shouted accusingly, sounding a bit like a teenage girl.
Watari turned on the lamp again. "It was not me! As you can see I have been facing towards the door, therefore it would be quite illogical to assume I could reach over to your arm."
"Ah, quite," L said.
Light shot an accusing glance at Ryuk, who grinned. "Wasn't me." Light made a mental note of needing to ask Remu if shinigami could lie.
Just then, there was another knock at the door. Watari stood up to answer, and found a sheepish Matsuda on the other side of the door in his pyjamas.
"Matsuda, you were meant to be sharing a room with Aizawa," Watari stated.
"Uh, yeah, I know, but he kicked me out of bed cause…see we had this lover's spat and…"
Everyone stared at him.
"NOT LITERALLY! I meant...metaphorically! Yeah, that's right! Metaphorically!"
Light announced in an official tone "There is no more room in this bed!" Misa disagreed and kicked Remu out of it.
"No, Matsuda-san can sleep next to Misa!" she squealed. Remu growled.
"Uh…ok," Matsuda blushed and lay down where Remu had been. "Hey, it's warm here…" he muttered.
Remu decided to lie down on top of Ryuk. "Oi!" the shinigami bellowed.
"Let me sleep here and I'll give you the rest of my apples for the next week," she said sweetly. Ryuk shut up. Light thought he might puke…shinigami? Being sweet? This night couldn't possibly be worse. He was sharing his bed with Matsuda, Misa, Watari, L, and two shinigami with bad breath. The only thing that could go wrong now was-
"…Son?" Yagami senior looked in through the door at what seemed to be an orgy.
"DAD! It's not what it looks like!" Light stuttered.
"What are you talking about? I just came to see if there was any room for me in here, and…"
Everyone groaned, except for Light who stood up explosively.
"FINE!" Light screamed. "YOU LIE HERE AND I'LL GO SLEEP ON THE SOFA!" Misa whined as her beloved Light was replaced with who she hoped would one day be her father in law.
Light turned off the lamps so nobody would see when he dragged the two shinigami from the bed with him to the sofa in the other room.
"Hey…I can feel my foot again…" L remarked.
In the other room, Light settled himself between the two shinigami on the sofa, who complained loudly about the arrangement. But Light was happy.
For Gods of Death, they sure were warm.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Hooray for weird pairings! \(n . n)/