|Shuddup Hill 2
Author: schreiberjoe PM
NEW CHAPTER. The hospital scene is up. Where is Lawla? Will Mareeyah be able to seduce Jaimes? What will happen to Jaimes? Stay tune to find out!Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 8 - Words: 28,761 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 02-23-07 - Published: 12-08-05 - id: 2694226
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Shuddup Hill 2
"Of all the fucking places, why must that pesky little witchbrat run into the hospital? Oh, she probably needed the doctor, yeah… WHEN I BREAK HER NECK, THAT IS! HA!"
Chapter 8: BoogeyHaven Hospital
The door to the main lobby of the hospital opened with an ear-piercing creak. Jaimes and Mareeyah briskly walked into the dark, dusty and shit-smelling interior of the forsaken place.
"Hello?" Mareeyah shouted. "Anybody?"
"Here…Lawla… Lawla… Lawla… Lawla…" Jaimes called out, looking under a nearby flowerpot.
"Jaimes, what are you doing?" Mareeyah asked, rolling her eyes over.
"Looking for that witchbrat." He replied.
"I wonder where the fuck is everyone?" She asked, looking away from Jaimes' stupid act.
"I don't give a damn about the others. All I wanna know is… where the fuck is that moronic witchbrat?" Jaimes shouted, putting down the flowerpot and looked at her.
"What?" She said. "Why are you looking at me for? How the hell would I know? I'm not a psychic…" Mareeyah replied, sarcastically as she walked past him, rolling her eyes over.
"Bitch!" Jaimes mumbled silently, under his breath.
"Jaimes, what are you mumbling about?" Mareeyah asked, turning to face him. "Are you scolding me?"
"Uh, n-nothing." He replied, giving her an innocent look. "OOOOH LOOK-Y HERE… A MAP!" He blabbered, trying to change the topic as he hurriedly rushed over to the nearby bulletin board.
"I can see that, Jaimes… you don't have to shout..." She said, walking after him.
"Whatever…" He said, as he grabbed the piece of paper off from the bulletin board.
"GAH! What the fuck was that?" Mareeyah asked.
"Um… that was my stomach. I'm kinda hungry…" Jaimes replied, sheepishly. "Let's go look for some food first…"
"FOOD? But what about that little girl?" Mareeyah asked.
"Oh right… we will look for food AND that fucking witchbrat..." Jaimes mumbled.
"?" Mareeyah stood there staring at him with disgust. "Okay, so where should we look?" She finally asked.
"Hmmm…" Jaimes studied at the map in his hand. "… how about the Reception Office? I bet, the receptionists' got some leftover sandwiches or something…"
The two of them arrived at the inside of the Reception Office.
Jaimes began to explore around the place, while Mareeyah just stood at a corner doing nothing.
"Mareeyah, why the fuck are you just standing there doing nothing?" He asked, looking at her. "Come over and help me look…"
"What? And risk breaking my beautiful nails? No way…" She told him. "… besides, there's nothing in the script that requires me to do anything. I'm supposed to be the bimbo that follows you…"
"Screw you… you delusional bitch!" He thought silently in his mind. And so, with nothing to be found in the Reception Office, Jaimes and Mareeyah proceeded onto the next door.
Once again, Mareeyah just stood at one corner, by herself, while Jaimes kept himself busy searching around the place.
It was then that Jaimes managed to find a weird document on the table.
This disease is inside everybody, and under the right circumstances, any fucking man would be driven, like that bastard, to "the other side". Well, maybe the term wasn't the most suitable way to describe it… afterall, its rather dramatic for a man to become a transvestite overnight.
Some bastards say it isn't a disease. But I beg to differ because I'm also a transvestite… But sometimes, I have to ask myself if its ethical for one to have both a penis and a vagina. But to him, there simply is no other choice since he finds it kinky to have both reproductive organs."
"Eewww… this is fucking sick!" He thought.
(Something else is hand-written at the bottom of the document…)
"I g0t thE keY fr0m j0Ey. Its pr0babLy thE keY t0 thE b0x."
"Huh? What box?" Jaimes muttered. "Wait. Could it be the… Lunch box?"
Jaimes briskly put away the document, when he caught sight of a shiny object on the table. It was shaped like a penis. The tag on the key read, "Penis Key". Jaimes rolled his eyes over before stashing the key away and continued searching around the place.
However, after searching around the place for hours, Jaimes still couldn't find that notorious Lawla witchbrat or anything edible. So, together with Mareeyah, both of them quickly exited from the room.
Jaimes and Mareeyah had arrived at the second floor, through the stairway. The very moment they had stepped foot on the corridor on the second floor landing, they saw something that made their blood froze.
In front of them were a bunch of crazy mannequin nurses, with dildos in their hands, performing some disgusting tasteless dances along the corridor.
Jaimes screamed in fright, while Mareeyah was squealing with excitement. "WOO-HOO…" There was a burst of enthusiasm in her voice. "Look Jaimes… D-I-L-D-O-S!" Mareeyah began to drool.
Suddenly, one of the nurses beside them tried to stab a dildo up Jaimes' ass.
"GAH!" Jaimes screamed.
Jaimes quickly took out his wooden plank to bash at the smelly plastic figure in uniform. He then dodged away from more ass-dildo-stabbing assaults as he hurriedly ran for cover, in one of the nearby rooms, pulling Mareeyah with him.
(Inside the Women's Locker Room…)
Jaimes locked the door behind him.
"Jaimes! Why the fuck did you pull me away?" Mareeyah asked him, obviously disappointed that she was missing all the excitement of the dildo party outside.
"What the fuck?" Jaimes shouted. "Are you crazy? Those were dildos!"
"So? Its just dildos…" She said, turning around and trying to open the door, attempting to head back outside.
Jaimes immediately rushed to the door and blocked her way. "DILDOS! DILDOS! DILDOS! IS THAT WHAT YOU WHORES ALWAYS THINK ABOUT? HUH? IS THAT IT?" He cried, bursting into tears.
"Wha-?" Mareeyah stopped. "What's wrong with him?"
"Jaimes honey… look what I got for your twenty-eighth birthday?" Marey shouted in excitement, as she ran towards him with a funny-shaped box in her hands.
"My birthday's two months ago…" Jaimes replied dryly. "… and for your information, I'm twenty six, not twenty eight… you dumb hag!"
"Whatever, you look old anyway…" She replied.
"Why you-!" Jaimes started to protest.
"Look at… THIS!" The woman screamed in excitement as she pulled out a metallic object, with dangling cables and a plug, out from the box.
"Huh? You got me a… heating prod? You know how I hate to boil water and-"
"No, you silly… it's a fucking electro-dildo!" She giggled.
A/N: Well, guess you guys know what happened next. It involved (1) Marey using the metal dildo on Jaimes and (2) plugging the other end of the dildo to the power supply. Okay, I think I shall stop right here as its getting too X-rated.
End of Flashback…
"I-its… m-my wife… I mean, my ex-wife…" Jaimes stammered. "S-she used to t-torture me… no, wait… e-electrocute me with… with… a metal dildo…"
"That sounds like fun…" Mareeyah muttered.
"What the-?" Jaimes gasped, looking at her.
Mareeyah gulped as she saw the horrendous look on his face. "I-I…I, I mean funny… you know, as in weird." She flustered. "The electrocuting part sounded w-weird." She stammered.
Jaimes was still staring at her. "She scares me…" He thought.
"Alright, fine… I guess I'm gonna have to give the dildo party outside a pass… okay?" She grumbled.
Jaimes rolled his eyes over as he proceeded to explore around the place. Just as he was walking along the many lockers, he somehow managed to open one of them.
Inside it was a Shotgun.
"Huh? Who the fuck would keep a Shotgun in the hospital locker room?" Jaimes said, holding on to the weapon.
"They'd probably ran out of sedatives…" Mareeyah said dryly.
"Whatever…" Jaimes shrugged, as he kept the Shotgun in his possession. He then proceeded to explore around the place when he found a purple Barney miniature doll, to the right of the locker.
"BARNEY!" He screamed, rushing over to the stuffed creature.
"BARNEY!" A voice echoed, as she entered the mansion.
"What the hell?" She wondered. "Who the fuck was that?"
Mareeyah looked around the empty mansion. There was no one in sight. She slowly walked towards the centre of the living room. "Hello?" She called out.
She slowly made her way around the place when something at the fireplace caught her attention. At the fireplace was a board. And on the board were the words, "My daddy is a prick!". Mareeyah tried to open the cover, but it remained stubbornly stuck in its place.
"Argh! To hell with this stupid fireplace. I'd better go look around this fucking mansion…" She told herself, moving away from the fireplace, as she continued to look around the rest of the living room. "… where the fuck are all the men, anyway?"
Just then, Mareeyah found the map of the mansion on a bookshelf. Mareeyah shrugged and stashed away the map before she continued to make her way around the place when she managed to find some revolver ammunitions on the coffee table.
"Ammunitions? In a house? What kind of people lived here anyway?" She asked herself.
(Later, at the second floor corridor of the mansion…)
Mareeyah managed to look up just in time to see a nearby door slammed shut. She quickly ran over to the door and tried to open it. But somehow, something seemed to be keeping it shut from the inside.
"HEY! WHO'S IN THERE?" She screamed, knocking on the door. "OPEN UP, YOU DORK!"
"Uh… n-nobody…" A male voice mumbled.
"A man, finally!" She thought.
"T-there's nobody in here, so go away!" The male voice said.
"Well, if there's nobody in there, who the fuck am I speaking to then?" She asked, sarcastically.
"Um…" The male voice muttered. "… uh, t-this… this is… um… the voice recording machine. Yeah… the voice recording machine… so please leave your message after the beep."
The person made a fake imitation of a beeping sound.
"Hello? Do you think I'm gonna believe your stupid voice recorder trick? Huh? Is that it?" She shouted, as she continued to bang on the door.
"Whatever… just go away already!" The voice screamed. "You are disturbing me…"
"So, are you sexy?" She purred.
"Wha-? Its none of your fucking business. Now, go away!" The voice persisted.
"Ooh… attitude! I like it…" She giggled, in a slutty way. "So, you want a quickie?"
"No." The male voice said.
"But why?" She asked. "Are you gay?"
"So, do you want to-"
"Fuck! Why do you have so many questions?" The man asked.
"That's because I wanna be sure who I'm gonna give my virginity to…" She told him.
"Y-you… a virgin?" The man asked, suddenly sounding interested.
"No, silly… I just said that because I wanna get your attention." Mareeyah laughed.
The man sweatdrop.
"Anyway, I'm the whore at the stripjoint down the street." She continued. "My name is Mareeyah."
"Oh…" He moaned. "… in that case, just go away… I only bang virgins, okay? Other whores just irritate me."
"Look, mister… I just want to prostitute myself here… and I don't need your insults…" She scowled. "Say, what the fuck is your name anyway?"
"Engram." He finally said.
"Haemorrhage?" She laughed. "Wahahahaha…"
"Its Boryng… and stop making fun of my name… it hurts, okay?" Engram fumed. "Now, just go away, bitch!"
"So, Mister Engram… did you shouted for Barney earlier?"
"Hello?" She called out.
(Snoring sounds behind the closed door.)
Engram had fallen asleep.
End of Flashback…
The girly voice of Jaimes woke Mareeyah from her flashback.
"What is it, you sissy?" She walked over to him.
"Barney's pussy bit me." He cried.
"How can a toy's pussy bite yo-" She said. "WAIT! You mean, Barney's got a pussy?"
Jaimes nodded his head.
"If Barney's a girl, then… EEWWW… WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, FONDLING AT THE TOY'S PUSSY AT THE FIRST PLACE? NO WAIT… I-I, I DON'T THINK I WANNA KNOW…" She screamed, in disgust. "You sick fuck!" She thought.
"Eh, what's this?" Jaimes said, as he examined at the private part of the stuffed creature. "Look Mareeyah, there's a bent needle stuck in the private part here…"
And so, Jaimes took the bent needle out and slid it inside his pocket.
The couple made their way to the third floor of the hospital.
Jaimes and Mareeyah was exploring the many rooms in the patients' wing on this floor, when Mareeyah suddenly began to moan.
"What the fuck is it this time?" Jaimes asked.
Mareeyah suddenly grabbed at his arm.
"GAH! What the-? Mareeyah, this is not the time to get horny!" He said, brushing her hands away.
"N-no… Jaimes… I-I, I… I'm kinda tired…" She said.
"Holy cow! Mareeyah, you look like shit!" Jaimes said, staring at her face. "Oh, alright… let's get you to that room over there…" Jaimes said, pulling her along as they made their way into one of the patient's room.
(Inside Room S3…)
The very moment they had stepped into the room, Mareeyah immediately threw herself onto the dirty mattress next to them.
"Hmmm… so comfy…" She moaned, as she rolled around the bed like an idiot.
"Mareeyah, stop it. You look like an idiot." Jaimes said. "God! Why can't she behave like a normal person?"
"So comfy… mmmpf…" She continued to moan, rolling around the bed and tilting her legs apart.
"GAH! What the fuck is wrong with you?" He asked. "And what the fuck is that smell?"
She continued to moan like a horny bitch.
"Smells like some dead rat…" Jaimes continued to sniff around the area between her widespread legs. "Eewww… is it STD? It is STD, isn't it?"
"No Jaimes... its just a hangover…" She replied.
"Yeah right… I never see you drink anything along the way… So how the fuck could you get a hangover? You big, fat liar!" He thought.
Mareeyah then grabbed a bottle off from the table, next to the bed, and popped its contents into her mouth and swallowed them.
"GAH! MAREEYAH… WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?" Jaimes screamed. "GOD KNOWS HOW LONG THOSE PILLS WERE THERE!"
She placed the bottle back on the table and she started to strip. "Hot… its getting fucking hot in here…"
"GAH!" Jaimes shrugged away in disgust. The woman before him was beginning to freak him out with her super gross naked body. Jaimes was, once again, painfully reminded of his disgusting wife, Marey.
"Come to me, baby..." Mareeyah moaned, as she grabbed at his hand.
"I-I… I, I think you should rest..." He said, trying to push her hand away.
"You know you want me, baby... now come to me and give that sexy ass of yours to me,,,"
Mareeyah pulled him closer to her. Jaimes could feel her hot breath on his face. The smell was sickening.
"Let go of me..." He shouted, punching her in the face.
Mareeyah fell back onto the bed, unconscious.
"Phew! I'd better get the fuck out of here before she wakes up…" He thought.
And so, Jaimes quickly ran out of the room.
Jaimes came out of the stairway door leading to the roof of the BoogeyHaven Hospital. He slowly walked around the roof, when he heard some strange noise lurking around the place.
"Eh? What the fuck is that?" He mumbled, listening intently to the noise.
He slowly walked around the place, trying to locate the source of the noise when he arrived at the Elevator Control Room. Suddenly, he saw a funny shadow coming up from behind him and he swirled around.
It was Conehead.
(Creature mumble)- Translation: (mumbles) Hello? Somebody?
"GAH! " Jaimes gasped.
(Creature mumble)- Translation: (mumbles) Eh? Who's there? Is somebody there?
"Get away from me… you stupid mumbling freak!" Jaimes shouted at Conehead.
(Creature mumble)- Translation: (mumbles) Could you help me to pull this fucking cone off my head?
"I-I… I, I still can't hear what you are mumbling about with that cone on your head…" Jaimes cried.
(Creature mumble)- Translation: (mumbles) Just help me take this cone off my head, will you?
Conehead began to move forward, with his hands stretching forward, reaching for Jaimes. "Stay back, you sick fuck!" Jaimes screamed, retreating from him.
Unfortunately, because of the cone stuck on his head, Conehead could not see the small rock in front of him and he stupidly tripped over the tiny rock.
(Creature mumble)- Translation: (mumbles) Oops!
The trip caused Conehead to lunge forward, making him falling towards Jaimes and accidentally pushing him off from the edge of the roof.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH…" Jaimes screamed, falling off from the roof and into the darkness below.
A/N: Nothing much to say except… R&R. TTFN.