|Chances In Life
Author: XO'MagickMoon'OX PM
Riku's a passionate musician who doesn't believe in love. Sora just didn't think he'd ever find love. What happens when they meet? [AU] [RikuxSora]Rated: Fiction T - English - Romance/Drama - Riku & Sora - Chapters: 16 - Words: 63,874 - Reviews: 621 - Favs: 246 - Follows: 243 - Updated: 12-11-06 - Published: 12-26-05 - id: 2721768
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
.Chapter XVI. The Party
A/N: Special thanksies to
+RainbowSerenity -blows kisses-
+Aornis Lethe -showers with hearts-
for your fantastamazing reviews! Much appreciated!
And everyone, I am sooooo sorry, again, for the delayed update. I think this is going to be my regular updating habit now... not every other week like I used to do... long ago... -reminisces- And I'm very sorry for the wait!
But, just soes ya know, if ever I'm not updating my fanfiction, there's a good chance I'm updating my original fiction on fictionpress. Just go to my profile and click on my homepage! And on that note, I want to thank Lingering-Misery-of-Sorrow for reviewing my humble original fiction! Thank you muchly! -gives heart-shaped cookies-
And I hope to be updating Deadly Desire soon, for any of you who might be waiting for that. I'll at least have it out by Christmas; that is my goal! And maybe another chapter of this while I'm at it:D I'm on a mission! I should have been done with these stories by now. D: Not that I want them to really end too quickly, but you know..
Oh, and I do not own the song Paperthin Hymn by Anberlin. I suggest you check it out on www(dot)purevolume(dot)com/anberlin
Anyway, enjoy! And please, keep your all sporks, knives, and other assorted sharp objects inside the cabin at all times.
"Yeah. Tonight. At Yuffie's house."
I twirled the spirally telephone cord around my finger. "Sure, I can come, I guess. What time?"
I smiled. "Okay. Uh…Riku, what about Kairi?"
"Oh, I was thinking that, well, maybe just you and I could go."
I chuckled a little. "Like a date-ish thing?"
"Yeah, like a date-ish thing."
"I'll pick you up, all right?"
"Mhm. I'll be waiting. Bye."
There was a space at the end of his voice, as if he wanted to say something else. I wondered if it was the same thing I wanted to say. But then there was a click, and the dial tone filtered into my ear. I shrugged, then dialed another number: my mom's. I told her about tonight and asked for permission, which was granted, and then hung up. A smile curved my lips as I went to get ready for the party; I had two hours before Riku would come to pick me up. I didn't bother calling Kairi, feeling for once that I would just do something on my own, without her consent or opinion or (I shuddered) fashion advice. Yes, I could definitely do without that last one.
I washed my face and brushed my teeth and fixed my hair before stepping into my bedroom and beginning to fish through my drawers. I came up with a plain blue long-sleeved shirt, one that fit rather snugly but was not suffocating (and matched my eyes, to boot) and then a pair of jeans. My own jeans. My own jeans that fit me as they should. They fell nicely on my hips and were tight enough that they showed off my ass but didn't have me needing to try and tug them down every five seconds. Not long after, I was ready. I checked myself in the full-length mirror propped against the wall beside my dresser and grinned at my reflection. I think…I looked okay.
Something on my dresser caught my eye, then, something silver and glinting. I picked it up, recognizing it as a necklace, one I'd gotten on Destiny Islands. It was a simple silver chain attached to two prongs of a three-pronged crown charm. I smiled fondly at it, running my thumb over the immaculate silver metal. I made a decision then and fastened it around my neck, letting it rest a few inches beneath the hollow of my throat, backed by blue cotton fabric.
Then I went downstairs to watch TV while I waited for Riku, grabbing my shoes and tugging them on as I sat on the couch.
Just as the clock struck seven, the doorbell rang. I laughed to myself and grabbed my jacket off the coat rack in the foyer before opening the door. Riku stood there, in a black long-sleeved fishnet shirt with a black tank top underneath. His jeans were a dark denim and hugged him in all of the right places, and below the frayed hems were striped black and gray sneakers. He smiled at me, and I melted inside.
"Ready to go?"
I nodded, stepping out the door and closing it behind me. He took my hand and pulled, and I stumbled into his arms, our lips drawn together as if infused with positive and negative charges, always attracted. I think he had the negative charges. My whole body tingled with the connection, and the pieces of a puzzle I hadn't known I'd been doing were put into place. It was a good feeling.
Somehow we got into Riku's car only a few minutes later, and I was buckling in. There was a song playing. It sounded kind of sad.
"……………………re distant lullabies.
If I could turn around I would tonight."
"This is pretty," I said, gesturing to the melancholy music, delicate guitar chords and a quiet murmuring voice.
"Yeah." Riku started up the car and pulled away down the street. "It gets heavier."
Since your paper heart stopped beating—
leaving me suddenly alone.
Will daybreak ever come?"
There were a few more intense guitar chords and then the chorus exploded, with more anger now than sadness.
"Who's gonna call on Sunday morning? Who's gonna
drive you home?
I just want one more chance, to put my arms in fragile hands."
I looked out the window and watched the nighttime world pass by, watched the blurs of passing streetlamps and lighted house windows. It was nice…ostensibly normal and harmless, but something felt perfidious.
"I thought you said forever… over and over,
A sleepless night becomes, bitter oblivion.
These thoughts run through my head… over and over,
Complaints of violins, become my only friends."
"August evenings, bring solemn warnings,
To remember, to kiss the ones you love goodnight."
"You never know what temporal days may bring,
So laugh, love, live free, and sin.
When life is in discord, praise ye the Lord."
"Who else is going to be at the party?" I asked, turning to Riku.
"Um… me, you, Seph, Tidus, Wakka, Leon, Yuffie (of course), probably Aerith and maybe Cloud, if Leon worked up the courage to ask him, and then whoever else Yuffie saw fit to invite, as well as a horde of people she didn't invite. So…expect a full house." He smiled at me, only briefly because he had to keep his eyes on the road, but I still melted inside. Again. At this rate I was just going to be a big pile of Sora-good by the time we got to the party.
"……………………… in fragile hands.
I thought you said forever… over and over,
A sleepless night becomes bitter oblivion.
These thoughts run through my head… over and over,
Complaints of violins become my only friends."
"I thought you said forever… over and over,
A sleepless night becomes bitter oblivion.
These thoughts run through my head… over and over,
Complaints of violins become my only friends."
"I thought you said forever… over and over
(And over and over)
These thoughts run through my head…"
We were quiet for a while, with only the purr of the engine and the melody of the music filling the silence. Then, Riku said, "Are you nervous at all?"
I turned to him and blinked, though he didn't see it, what with his eyes on the road and all. "No. Should I be?"
"Of course not," Riku said all too quickly, but with passionate conviction. He added, more gently, "I was just…making sure. I never want you to be uncomfortable with me."
I smiled a little. "I'm never uncomfortable with you," I told him.
I could see half of his mouth smile, too. "Good." And then he was parking the car, and leaning over to kiss me.
Tonight, I told myself as I pulled Sora forward to kiss him, biting on his bottom lip and feeding off of his whimper like a vampire feeding off of a young woman's blood. I wanted more, so much more. Tonight this dance ends.
That's all this was, this relationship with Sora. It was a dance, a dance I led with practiced precision, the same dance I'd danced with many, many others. And, as per usual, when I threw him up in the air, took him to the highest of highs, and made to catch him as he came back down, I would step away and he would crash to the floor. And the dance would end. The musicians would leave, the lights would dim, and we'd never cross paths again. And life would go on.
I pressed closer to him, taking his face in my hands and kissing him harder, deeper, delving my tongue into his mouth, delighting in the way he shuddered as my hand took a trip to his stomach, sliding under his shirt and up. He sank further into the passenger seat, and I moved on top of him, reaching for the handle on the side of the seat to make it recline. Sora fell back with the seat, and I went with him, still attached at the mouth, my hand crawling ever higher. Desperate, short-lived gasps of breath were exchanged whenever our mouths disconnected enough to allow them passage, which was never for long, a half a second at most. I wanted him, more of him, all of him. I needed him.
Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Halt that train of thought. I did not need him. I never needed anyone. Need was something that besieged the weak, those weak fools who "fell in love". I never needed. I only ever wanted.
Let's try this again.
I wanted him like I'd never wanted anyone before. My hand began to push up the soft blue barrier of Sora's shirt. Up, up, up… Inch by inch his stomach, and then his chest, was revealed. My lungs were on fire with the need for oxygen, and I grudgingly broke the kiss, but could not for the life of me part from Sora. I moved my kisses to his jaw, feeling his chest rise and fall like ocean waves beneath my hands, the sound of his hot panting only fueling my desire. My face was flushed, my heart racing, I don't think I could've stopped myself then if I'd wanted to. His fingers were digging harmlessly into my shoulders, his head rolling back obligingly as my teeth nipped at the soft flesh of his bared throat, kissing and biting and sucking teasingly, making him whimper and mewl in a way that wound a pleasant knot in my stomach, in my chest, making my heart not just race but flutter. I was sure it wasn't healthy for a heart to flutter. Not that I really cared right then.
I breathed deeply through my nose, inhaling the scent of Sora's skin, sweat and something bittersweet that I would have thought to be cologne, if it weren't for the fact that the scent was far too amazing to be anything fabricated by man and packaged and stocked on the shelf to be sold for five dollars a bottle. Or even one-hundred dollars a bottle. It was just uniquely Sora. And no one would ever smell it like this but me, some part of me hoped. Hoped? No, what did I care, if anyone else ever got this close to Sora? That was right, I didn't. So I should just stop thinking about it and start paying attention to a newly awakened part of my body that was beginning to demand attention. A more southern part of my body. And these jeans were cut far too tightly to make for any sort of comfort then.
I started sucking on Sora's collarbone then, determined to leave a mark, when Sora murmured, "Riku… I think—"
There was an annoying, sharp rap at the window. I growled lowly, grabbing the door handle swiftly and swinging the car door open so that it collided with our audience.
There was a sharp curse from behind the door, the voice thickened with an all too familiar islander accent. I rolled out of the car, straightening myself, the cold air being generous enough to calm my inferno of a body. "What was that for, ya?" Wakka demanded, rubbing his knee.
"You asshole," I snarled, turning and smiling for Sora's sake as I helped him out of the car. He hurried to right his attire, pulling down his shirt and blushing fiercely. Oh, that blush… He was so adorable. I tucked my arm around his waist and pulled him close, shoving my other hand into my jeans' pocket. I tossed another glare at Wakka, who'd forgotten about his new bruises and was smiling cheekily at us, winking suggestively.
"Have some decency," another voice, this one colder, spoke up. I noticed Tidus standing there, then, beside Wakka. He looked as icy as his voice sounded. I ignored him, and he ignored me. And yet the silence between us seemed so loud.
("You just don't get it, do you? I may not know Sora very well, but from what I gather, he's a sweet, trusting, innocent guy. He cares about you.")
Wakka and Tidus walked ahead of us up the stairs of the porch to the front door. Some of the windows glowed yellow in the night, and there were shadows moving inside. Music pulsed heavily through the ground, but the song itself was inaudible.
("You're pretending like he's just another goddamn soon-to-be conquest!")
Sora leaned into me, and I surmised that despite what he'd said, he was a little nervous. "Have you ever been to a party like this before?" I asked.
He looked up at me with wide blue eyes, and he was blushing again. He averted his gaze, scuffing his foot on the porch as Wakka opened the door for us. "Well…not exactly…"
("Jesus, Riku, wake up! I thought you'd be able to see it yourself…")
Even as we moved inside and the thrumming atmosphere ensconced us, I could see Tidus bristled and tense in front of us. With a last parting glare,
("Riku, you're going to make a big mistake, and when you do, an I-told-you-so won't even begin to cover it.")
he disappeared into the throng of dancers congregated in the living room. In the living room, it was dark, with only blue strobe lights cutting through the shadows. I could smell alcohol in the air, though thankfully no smoke—Yuffie tended to keep the drug-usage under control with an iron fist (something about her grandmother passing away from lung cancer a few years ago). She didn't so much mind the alcohol, so long as everyone had a designated driver. To her credit, wild as she was, Yuffie was a pretty responsible hostess. I know that using "Yuffie" and "responsible" in the same breath might be a little unthinkable, but really, cut her some slack folks.
Speak of the Devil.
I was suddenly caught around the middle by two very bare and familiar arms, and Yuffie was hugging me tightly. "Hey Yuffie," I choked.
"Riku! Riku! Riku! I'm so glad you're here! And did you bring—oh, yes you did. SORA!" In a flash she'd turned on him and had him in her death grip. He looked to me for help, but I just smiled. He pouted at me. She pulled back after a moment and held him at arm's length, looking comically serious. "Now, Sora, don't take anything anyone offers you to drink—especially Riku. If you want something, go to the 'fridge and get an unopened can of soda, and don't let it out of your sight." She sounded like a mother sending her son off on his first date. Then she winked and smiled, and everything was right with the world. "I know that Riku would love to take advantage of you, were you inebriated enough to not protest. And trust me, you don't want to have sex with Riku; he's probably crawling with diseases, like a dog." She leaned towards him and whispered, though purposefully loud enough for me to hear, "Really, that's all he is, just a filthy mongrel." Leaning back and speaking louder, she said, "And so ladies, remember, never be afraid to just say no. If he really cares about you, he won't force you into anything." She patted Sora on the back and disappeared into the shadows and sound of the living room, throwing a last wink over her shoulder.
Sora was looking confused and very pink. He turned to me, as if for an explanation. I just smiled, took his hand, and led him into the living room.
I should have realized that whatever was in the punch bowl sitting innocently on the table was going to be spiked, but apparently I lack the acuity for realizing things before it's too late.
"Riku, where are we going?"
It was almost eleven o'clock, and I'd had enough spiked punch to be borderline drunk. Sora and I had been dancing for most of the night, sometimes talking to people, sometimes just flopping down on the couch and relaxing, and sometimes just flopping down on the couch and making-out. That's what we'd been doing when I'd decided to drag Sora upstairs to one of the empty guest rooms. I don't think anyone noticed us leaving, but then again—I think I was too intoxicated to notice.
Now, mind you, I wasn't totally smashed, or anything so drastic. But the walls of my inhibitions had been definitely knocked down a few feet, and my judgment was skewed. Right then, I decided that it was a good thing I wasn't totally in my right mind; somehow, I figured this whole thing would go a lot smoother if I wasn't completely aware of what was going on, but just aware enough to enjoy it.
I rounded on Sora at the second floor landing and captured his lips, pulling him flush against me. He moaned, and I figured he was just as hot as me. His hips gravitated towards mine, pushing a little, and I growled, drawing him away to the guest room. I threw the door open and slid inside, closing it behind us, and then eased Sora to the bed. I could feel him tense, breaking the kiss and looking up at me with curious eyes as his knees folded upon contact with the edge of the mattress. I bent one knee beside him, leaning down and kissing him again, coaxing him back. I called upon almost every skill my tongue and hands were capable of then, making Sora relax and seducing him into going along with it all.
Somehow we wound up in the middle of the bed, with Sora's head against the neatly placed pillows. The made sheets were starting to wrinkle underneath us, rippling with smooth grooves. I was kissing his neck, biting and sucking and doing anything to elicit a noise. I nipped at his collarbone, my hands pushing up his shirt and tracing the faint muscles of his stomach; they twitched under my fingers, and I chuckled. "Riku," he murmured, his hands moving from my back to my hair to the sheets, obviously unsure of what to do with themselves.
My skin crawled with heat, and my pants were too tight again—and surely it was the alcohol, because I shouldn't be this easily hot and bothered. Or maybe it was just Sora…something about him was so addicting, so arousing, just the look in his eyes and the feel of his skin and the sound of his voice. I couldn't help but be drawn back to his face, and I stared at him for a moment before claiming that mouth that I was so obsessed with. Our tongues met, and I melted. His hands crawled around my shoulders, making me shiver. His touch was so innocent, so tentative, and yet so wanting to do something right. It was so endearing.
I wanted him. I wanted him so badly, and I wanted him right then.
My fingers rimmed the hem of his jeans, tugging on the belt loops. Sora didn't seem to notice, too preoccupied with my mouth and tangling his fingers in my hair. I wanted to purr as he started combing through it, unconsciously it seemed. My hands became attracted to the fly of his pants, and I started to undo the button and zipper—such annoying accessories. They always got in the way.
Sora broke the kiss, and I whined. I actually fucking whined. Damn alcohol. "Riku, what are you doing?" he asked breathlessly, his face flushed, and now beginning to redden further with what was unmistakably a blush.
I just kissed him again, sliding my fingers underneath the hem of his boxers. His skin was so soft. I wondered if it was just as soft everywhere else, and couldn't wait to find out.
"Riku," Sora said, a little more insistently, breaking the kiss again. He squirmed slightly.
"Shh." I sat up a bit so that I was kneeling over him, making Operation: Clothing Removal all the more easy. "Just relax," I told him, the words far too accustomed to my tongue. I could hear them echoing in my memory, having said them so many times to so many different people.
I leaned down and silenced him with another kiss. This time he didn't accept it, and I frowned slightly. If I'd been in a more stable frame of mind, I might have noticed the terrified look in his eyes. Terrified and suspicious. He pushed himself up, trying to sit. I put my hands on his shoulders and nibbled on his ear, earning a pleasured whimper.
"Just relax," I told him again, my hands returning to his pants. They were lower on his hips now, revealing the tempting jut of his hipbone. "You'll enjoy it, I promise."
"Enjoy what?" he demanded, and I'd never heard him use such a tone of voice before.
If I'd been in a more stable frame of mind, I might have cared.
"This," I said, sliding my hands down his pants. He yelped and squirmed again, his fingers curling around the sheets. His face was bright red.
"Riku, stop it…" he murmured.
"Don't tell me you don't want me," I purred, my breath hot against his ear.
"I—I do, but… Riku!" Sora jerked, grabbing my wrists and trying to wrench them away. He was shaking. "Stop it," he repeated, his voice wavering. "Please, I don't want to do this."
"Yes you do," I insisted, kissing his temple. "Trust me." I tried to ease him back down onto the bed, but he refused to move.
"I do…" he whispered. "I do trust you."
"Then what's the problem? It's just sex; stop being such a baby."
"What!" His eyes widened, and he tried to wriggle out from under me. My lips set into a thin line for a moment, and I held his face, making to kiss him again. He held me back. He was stronger than I'd anticipated. "Riku! Stop it! Why are you doing this? I don't want to have sex with you!"
I don't think he could have made it any clearer, but you know how it was… If I was in a more stable frame of mind, I might have listened.
"Why not?" I demanded, scowling slightly. Somewhere in my chest, his words stung. And maybe not only his words, but the terror and anger and hurt on his face. I think there were tears in his eyes, and he was trembling harder now.
"Riku…" he whimpered, screwing his eyes shut. He looked like he wanted to disappear. But I wouldn't let that happen; I'd come this far, and I wasn't backing down now. I was going to have him, and I was going to have him tonight. I kissed him again, forcefully and domineeringly and roughly, and he made another whimpering sound. "Riku…" he pleaded against my lips, and there was something hot between our faces, hot and wet. He was crying.
I'd seen tons of people cry before, mostly at my doing. This was no different; it didn't faze me. Or so I made myself believe. I was good at making myself believe things.
My hands returned to his pants, sliding them down his hips a little further, and a new flame of arousal streaked through my body. I kissed him more, parting his lips with my tongue. He seemed to be relaxing, and I eased my demanding kiss, being gentler. He wrapped his arms around my back, and I slid down so that our bodies were flush against each other, and I pushed my hips into his. He moaned quietly into my mouth, something that sounded like "Riku" and then—
He bolted, moving faster then I could register. He was on the floor in a heartbeat, somehow having gotten out from underneath me. I sat on the bed, staring at him and trying to figure out what had just happened. I hadn't gotten very far in my train of thought when Sora stood up, fixing his pants, and shouted at me, "I hate you! Olette and Naminé were right… I can't believe it…!" He was still crying, wiping his face with his fist. "I can't believe you'd really do this! How could you! Riku! Riku…" He sobbed loudly, his eyes closed tightly against the flood. Something inside of me was breaking at the sight, and I wanted more than anything to hold him and tell him that I was sorry, that it was a mistake—anything to make the tears stop. I had no idea where these urges came from, and frankly right then I didn't care about questioning them. I would later, but not now. Now I just...
But it was too late. He was throwing me a hateful tear-streaked look, and then he darted out the door, slamming it behind him.
It must have been that obnoxiously loud slam that brought me out of my spell, cleared my mind, sobered me up. Or maybe it was the reality, the reality of the situation—I'd been rejected. Someone had refused to sleep with me, and had gotten away. Or maybe it was Sora's tears and his words—
I hate you!
Yeah, maybe that was it. I couldn't be sure. All I could be sure of was that I was on the floor, leaning against the bed, and I was completely, despairingly, hopelessly numb.
I'd just lost Sora. I'd just lost Sora, and—would you believe it?—I was head-over-heels in love with him.
A/N: Ehhhh.. and so! Whatcha think? I don't know... I'm not sure if I liked the way I wrote it all too much; I think I was picturing it differently in my head. Same scenario, but with just... more... I don't know. Well, anyway, I want you all to know that it was very hard to write Riku this way, and that might attribute to some of the blah-ness of it.. ;-; Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed! Stay tuned for the next installment (which will hopefully come out sooner than this one did)!