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Author of 18 Stories |
Disclaimer: I sent a letter to the North Pole asking for the copyrights to Naruto, but as it didn't appear wrapped up underneath my Christmas tree on the 25th, I'm assuming Santa Claus thought I was spending too much time reading fanfiction and writing it to recieve it. Ah, well.
(A/N) This is a little ficlet I wrote after reading so many SasukeHinata (hmm... how would you put that together? Sasata?) fics. They really inspired me and I started to fall in love with the coupling, so here's my er... New Year's gift to you all SasukeHinata fans, 'cause I already posted a Christmas present, though it's for Inuyasha fans. Beware! Angst!
Also, it's rather... um... abstract. It's foggy and difficult to understand, so if you don't quite get it, drop me an e-mail and I'll attempt to explain it.
Anyways, enjoy!
Canvas
Taiyoukai Lady
(-)
She was like a blank canvas, they all thought. She wasn't beautiful, like some of the other girls her age, just average. She wasn't strong in any one area, just okay in all. She wasn't confident, or rowdy, or assertive, just a shy piece of blank canvas with no special traits. She looked like an ordinary village girl, besides her eyes, but even they mirrored the black canvas she was so often compared with.
'No...' the people whispered, 'She's worse than a canvas. At least with a canvas you can paint it.'
By the time she was a teen, she had heard the comparison so many times, she started to believe in it. Her confidence and self-esteem had been crushed long ago. The one person who had seemed to care for her was going out with one of her best friends, and she didn't know what she'd do without his encouragement. Finally, she decided to be what everyone said she was.
Blank.
Father and mother… needn't have died. Ultimately, without strength, there's nothing you can do. I wasn't strong enough. Our clan was destroyed. Everyone was killed… because you… let them die! You just… stood there and watched! Because you're nothing but a weakling!
Sasuke
Hyuuga Hinata breathed into her hand in a meek attempt to warm them up even a bit. She rubbed her arms and looked up at the sky. Why did the air have to be so cold?
It was a few days after Christmas, but not quite New Year's. The Hyuuga heiress looked around at the light around her in various buildings as she walked by. Inside, families would laugh and joke and be happy, the Christmas tree already gone, but the love and warmth still there.
Neji would be with Ten Ten, she knew. Lee would be with Gai and Kiba and Shino both had families to go to. It was no use trying to hang out with Naruto. The blond, though always nice to her, was going out with Sakura, who had given up on Sasuke. Hinata's childish crush still lingered, and it hurt her to see the boy who used to cheer her on be with another. Ino would be with Shikamaru and Choji, and Kurenai-sensei would be with all the other jounin.
It looked like she would be alone again this year.
She knew she was forgotten when, at the large Christmas gathering for the Hyuuga clan when she was 14, there was no gift for her under the large tree. It was her father's way of saying he didn't need her anymore. And so long as she didn't bother him or do anything that was affect the clan as a whole, he didn't care what she did. Hanabi was his heiress now, and Hinata no longer matter.
The next year, Hinata didn't go to the gathering.
Her feet crunched the snow as she walked along, alone. It was freezing, and she rubbed her arms briskly, but nothing seemed to help. She paused at a street and looked at the center of the town. There was a large tree there, and she knew if she went there, she would find Tsunade, and Naruto, and Sakura, and Ino, and Neji, and Ten Ten, and everyone else who mattered. But she knew they would only see a blank piece of canvas, and she left.
Ten Ten had given her a present this year. She had been over to train with Neji, and had brought something with her for Hinata. Hinata had smiled and accepted it politely, then watched as Ten Ten promptly forgot her with Neji's call. Neji has also given her something, haphazardly wrapped. At first Hinata thought he just needed practice with wrapping paper, but when she saw Ten Ten go home with a perfectly wrapped gift in her arms, she knew.
Neji had left her too.
She coughed. It was dry, hacking cough. She had gotten it a day ago, and it had been apparent that it would not become better without medical attention. But Hinata didn't want to go see the Hyuuga clan's healer. She didn't want to receive the pitying looks of disgust from other Hyuuga clan members. So she hadn't, and her cough had gotten worse.
And no one had noticed.
She didn't notice her sight getting blurry.
Sakura and Naruto had been the next to leave.
One day, Sakura had just walked up to her when they were alone and told her, "I'm going out with Naruto." When Hinata had only looked at her, she had continued, "I'm sorry, Hinata. I know you like him, but... he asked me yesterday, and you weren't doing anything about it... and... I'm tired of chasing Sasuke. So... I accepted." Hinata had just forced herself to smile and reply that it was all right, that she understood. And she did understand. They saw a blank canvas too. After that, everyone else had slowly moved away.
And Hinata was alone.
Baby brother, you're pathetic. If you want to kill me, settle for hating me until you can! Hate me… and live. Like the coward you are! Clinging to life… without honor!
Itachi
She opened her eyes and felt her brow furrow in confusion at the unnatural warmth she was feeling. She sat up and saw she was in a bed. Looking out of the window, she saw deserted streets and empty windows. She knew whose place this was.
"You're awake," a cold voice broke her reverie. She turned and faced him, and nodded, an unspoken question in her eyes. He answered, stoic, "You collapsed in the middle of the street. Nobody else was doing anything about it, so I brought you back here, to my place." She thanked him, but he didn't acknowledge her words. But even so, she smiled. The dream she had awoken from had been warm, comforting.
She left the next day, cough gone. He had gone out for food when she did so. When he returned, there was only a note and a strand of hair on the pillow that said she had been there at all.
He read the note, and smiled.
She hadn't known it at first. She had only known that she was almost always cold and that nobody seemed to really talk to her anymore. But she hadn't understood that she was alone until that incident.
They saw each other many times after that. With the many missions, their jounin instructors were often away, and soon, the four teams simply merged. They all trained together, and laughed together, and walked together, and joked together, and did everything together.
It was one such day that they decided they'd do a mini tournament. But nobody wanted to be alone against the best of their group, so everyone chose partners.
She would forever remember the shocked looks everyone else sent their way when he asked her to be his partner, or the warm feeling in her chest. She would forever laugh at the amazed expressions when he smiled at her agreement, a real, secret smile that no one had ever thought she would pull out of him.
She would forever love the memory of his smile when they won.
She was locked out of her own room. Now Hinata understood. Now she knew the extent the people's disgust in her. Now she knew how far away everyone else was.
Hinata had been alone. Completely and utterly alone. She had been in an empty void. A vortex of nothingness. A sky of darkness.
And she still was. Only she wasn't alone anymore.
I'd always… thought of myself as a full-fledged ninja… proud to be an equal as I trailed after my teammates… crushing on Sasuke and scolding Naruto… watching them… safely, from the behind. While they… would both risk anything to protect me. Lee says he likes me, too… and he risked his life to come between me and the danger. You're all my teachers… and you've shown me what I want to be… like you. All of you. Now it's your turn… to watch my back!
Sakura
Everyone had looked at her different after that. During their large training sessions, she would always be sparring with him. When they went out for ramen, she would always sit next to him. He had gained another shadow to add the multitudes he already had, but this shadow was different. He smiled at this shadow, he laughed with this shadow.
He painted this blank canvas.
She was in an empty void. A vortex of nothingness. A sky of darkness. A sea of black.
And she had no intention of moving.
No one had understood the reason why. They bombarded her with questions. Why...? Why...?
Why did she hang out with an angst-ridden chuunin? Why did she catch his eye? Why did she not settle for someone who would stay with her, instead of play and then leave?
Why did she love a dark avenger?
No, Hinata had no intention of moving. After all, why move, when all you want is right there with you? He was there, in the darkness. And so, she was happy to stay there, at his side.
She answered their questions the best she could, but they barraged her with more. Why...? Why...?
Because she wanted to. Because she had. Because he wasn't like that.
Because he was the only one to see a painting, with colors, however faded and worn.
They all thought she was a weakling, that she was useless, unfit for her position. But nobody bothered to peal away the illusion she had set up. So when he looked past the mask, not into the blank eyes everyone else saw, but into the shattered globes that so mirrored his own, she felt happy, for the first time in her life. So, in the end, she wasn't blank after all.
He had painted her.
Didn't you tell me, that you wanted to become the number one ninja in your village and make everyone respect you? If you had someone in your life who did more than that… who acknowledged your existence – even cared for you – wouldn't that person become the most important… treasured… person in your life?
Haku
"Hinata?"
Hinata smiled as Sasuke entered the room. Carelessly, he flung off the vest that marked him as one of the jounin elite. She rolled her eyes and grabbed the cloth, folding it neatly like she always did.
Calloused hands grabbed the vest and yanked it out of her grasp before throwing it... somewhere; it didn't matter. Soft lips massaged her own and Hinata grinned at her boyfriend's rare playful mood. Soon, the kiss ended, but Sasuke just pulled her into his embrace and whispered into her ear, "Do you know what day this is?"
Hinata only smiled and whispered a yes into his shoulder. It was the anniversary of the day he had found her on the streets. It was anniversary of the day it all started. Hard to believe only a year had passed since then.
She felt something cool slip onto her ring finger. A band, it seemed, that surrounded the thin extension of flesh. She didn't need the Byakugen to see what it was. The feel, the weight, the significance of the day, the kiss, the question... it was all rather obvious. But she looked anyways, because she wanted to make sure it was real, that she did have color and value and worth, if only to him.
He frowned, "Why did you bother looking? You knew what it was the moment I put it on you."
Hinata smiled at his response, "I wanted to know what it looked like."
He blinked and raised an eyebrow. "Right." His tone was amused and indulgent. But his lips were rather demanding and Hinata felt herself give in and reply to his long foreseen proposal in the best way she could.
They had both been shattered early on. He by his horrible past. She by the horrible people around her. He had never bothered to pick up the pieces. She had tried and failed. Now, they picked up each other's pieces, placing the shards together one by one. With each other.
As they climbed higher, she watched as everyone else fell past them. Ten Ten died in childbirth, leaving Neji with a motherless child who was a living reminder of the loved one he couldn't protect. Hinata saw the pain in Neji's eyes every time he looked at his daughter and hoped someone else would paint Neji again. Ino was found to be sterile, and she and Shikamaru were visibly upset about it. On a mission, they died, Shikamaru protecting his wife's body to the last breath. Hinata saw the bodies burn and wished them luck in the afterlife. Sakura broke up with Naruto soon after Sasuke and Hinata were engaged, and went out with Lee for a while. Heartbroken, Naruto turned cold and joined the ANBU when he was 19, throwing himself into work. Hinata rarely saw him anymore. Sakura then broke up with Lee, and went out with some other people for a while, each time leaving and breaking the male's hearts. Lee never quite healed, and died when he refused to give up information on Konoha to Sound ninjas. Hinata saw the mangled body return to Konoha and prayed Lee's spirit would never die. Sakura continued to break heart after heart, before finally settling down with a nice jounin that Hinata thought would be good for Sakura. Sakura divorced him a few months later. Hinata saw her do this time and time again, and shook her head sadly as every new heart cracked.
Some though, she was happy to see, climbed with them. Kakashi married Anko, and the Hatake clan was reborn. Asuma and Kurenai soon got together and the Sarutobi and Yuuhi clan were happy. Both Shino and Kiba found nice girls, and though they hadn't married them, had a home to go to every night. Hanabi, Hinata was glad to see, became a successful heiress when their father died, and the Hyuuga clan flourished. The two sisters often chatted and the Uchiha-Hyuuga relationship had never been better.
And Hinata wasn't alone anymore.
That's it. I've made up my mind! I am going to create my own nindo – my own ninja path! My own destiny!
Naruto