“We have a problem here,” Navi says sternly. I only half-hear her as I lay stretched out in the straw. I have been snoozing for the past hour or so, and I’m in no mood to find something else to do.

But then Navi starts to fly back and forth in front of my face. I can feel the breeze that she creates, and her glow permeates my eyelids. She also makes a strange noise as she moves, which I can only describe as “sparkly,” and the combination of these three characteristics of her movement are too distracting; I can’t pretend to be asleep any more.

“What’s the problem, Navi?” I mumble. She is floating directly in front of my face, which means that I have to be painfully cross-eyed to see her. This fairy has already caused me much suffering since we first met. Not only did she introduce herself by waking me up, but most of her advice in the Great Deku Tree had been completely unnecessary (just because my house has a curtain over the entrance does not mean that I don’t know how to open a door). And now, it seems as if my serious need for rest is causing another problem.

My fairy snorts with annoyance. “The problem, Link, is that Princess Zelda wants you to find the other two Spiritual Stones, and you’ve spent the last three days lazing around this ranch!” She sighs angrily. “You need to buck up, kid! The Great Deku Tree sent me to aid you on your quest, and I’m can’t aid you on a quest if you aren’t on one!”

Clearly, she’s angry. Part of me knows that she’s right; Princess Zelda basically has me under orders to get the two other stones, and the Great Deku Tree had sent me on this errand as well (both of them want me to stop this Ganondorf guy). And I’ve been just hanging out at the ranch for a few days, doing almost nothing. Of course, I don’t consider napping to be nothing.

But I like the ranch. Lon Lon Ranch is secluded enough that I feel right at home. Just walking through the market at Hyrule Castle Town had been almost more than I could handle, considering that I grew up in a forest where by the time I was eight, I knew everyone incredibly well. The idea of “strangers” is a frightening one. That’s why I’m so glad that only three people live and work on the ranch. There are plenty of animals, but I’m not too concerned with making friends with animals. And I like the people on the ranch; because of my experiences with Mido, I know that there will always be people who I won’t get along with.

First, there’s Talon, the ranch owner. He loves it when I played his stupid “super cucco” game; I play it just to humor him. I wasn’t a big spender in Kokiri Forest, so I don’t know what to do with all the rupees I found in the Great Deku Tree and the Lost Woods (Navi had been happy that I had at least visited Saria after I met Zelda). And I’m sure that Talon could be the most productive man in Hyrule if he didn’t fall asleep so easily. And Navi thinks I’m bad…

Then, there’s Ingo, the ranch hand. I admire him a lot, mostly for his self-control. He’s not especially attractive, nice, or skilled, but if I were in his place, I would have totally gone nuts on Talon’s ass ages ago. Ingo does almost all the work on the ranch, and while he might not deserve to own the ranch, he certainly should have get paid a lot more. I think that it might be best for him to put his wages toward some sort of anger management, though.

And finally, there’s Malon, Talon’s daughter. She already helped me to get into the castle those few days ago, and I was surprised to find her again at the ranch (even though I knew she lives here). I was expecting Hyrule to be incredibly vast, but I somehow found the ranch the day after I first met Malon. I thought it was going to take a few weeks.

And so I’ve been spending a few days just lounging around, which is all right with Talon. So long as I don’t get in Ingo’s way, Talon doesn’t mind me resting in the loft or playing with Malon. Playing with Malon isn’t as fun as I thought it would be. Sometimes, I upset the cuccos, and Malon has to calm them all down before she can get bandages for my battle wounds. Other times, I try to get her to pretend to be a damsel in distress so I can pretend to save her, and she refuses. “I can take care of myself, Fairy Boy,” she’ll tell me, and she sounds pretty stern for a ten-year-old.

“Are you listening to me?” Navi asks incredulously, and I blush and sigh.

“No,” I admit sullenly.

“Ugh!” she exclaims. “Look, get off of your little Kokiri butt so we can go to Kakariko Village and go up Death Mountain!”

I roll my eyes and get up. Navi is smirking triumphantly as I make my way down the ladder from the loft, but I smirk right back. “I’m getting off my little Kokiri butt,” I say snidely,” so I can go play with Malon.”

Navi’s glow changes from blue to purple as she grows angry. “You’ve got a job to do, mister!” she shouts shrilly, and it doesn’t occur to me that she can do anything to force me into a role that I don’t want.

Honestly, I was been wishing for a fairy, not a completely different life.

Soon, I find my new friend as she walks out of the house, a thick pair of work gloves in her hands.

“Sorry, Fairy Boy,” Malon says cheerfully. “I can’t play right now.”

I can’t possibly understand how she can be cheerful when she isn’t able to hang out with me. I don’t consider myself boring by any means, and there aren’t many other fun things at the ranch. “Uh, really? Are you sure?” I ask lamely.

She giggles. All the girls I know giggle like that. “Yes, I’m sure,” she says. “Dad asked for my help mucking the stable today, so…I’m going to muck the stables.”

She doesn’t sound horrified or disappointed in the least. I know what mucking the stables involves, since Ingo was complaining about it yesterday, and I asked him to explain it. And so I can’t understand how Malon can have a smile on her face as she informs me that she is going to ditch me for the grossest thing I have ever heard of.

I’m going to let this go. “Come on, Malon,” I whine. “Mucking the stables is gross, right? Wouldn’t you rather play tag or something? Or we could play ‘Hero and Princess’ or something…”

She grimaces. “Fairy Boy, you know I hate playing ‘Hero and Princess,’” she reminds me. She shakes her head and smiles again. “Tag would be fun, but I have to help Dad and Mr. Ingo. I can’t just tell Dad that I’m going to play tag instead.” Before I can ask her why she can’t, she shocks me by adding, “Besides, mucking the stables might not be the most fun in the world, but it does feel really good when you finish it.”

“See, Link?” Navi asks in a sickly-sweet, “I-told-you-so” voice. “Unlike you, Malon isn’t shirking her responsibilities.”

Before I can defend myself by pointing out that Malon isn’t expected to work every single day, my farm girl friend frowns at me. “Link, is this true?” I wince at the use of my name; she uses the nickname she made for me so often that she only uses my real name when she’s very serious. When I don’t answer, she turns to Navi and asks what’s going on.

Navi explains to her briefly about the Great Deku Tree and Princess Zelda, and Malon keeps frowning. Finally, she turns to me and shakes her head. “Link, you had a guardian spirit and a princess order you to save Hyrule, and you’re just goofing around the ranch,” she says sadly. “I really like playing and all, but you’ve got to go do what you have to. It’s your job!”

“It’s not a job,” I retort. I am terrible at defending myself verbally. “I don’t get paid.” Malon crosses her arms and glances angrily at my very full wallet. “I mean, I can keep what I find,” I add hastily.

“Link, you’re awesome and stuff, and I like being friends,” Malon says slowly, “but you’ve got responsibilities! Do I have to ask Dad to kick you off the ranch until you get these things done?”

I stiffen at the threat. Is my fellow ten-year-old this serious about making me follow through with my responsibilities? “No!” I shout at her, and I know I’m acting childish. “Fine, I’ll go. But I don’t want to!”

“Good, Fairy Boy,” she says, her face softening. I’m happy to her the silliness enter her voice again. “Now, be careful! You have to come back in one piece, or I’ll have to beat you up!”

I blink. “I can come back and visit?”

“Of course you can, silly,” she says, rolling her eyes. “You just need to go do your job first, you dense little boy.”

---

This chapter has been rewritten in the present tense. The first reason for this change is that I just wrote an entire story in the present tense, and I am now really used to writing in the present. The second (and not-so-cheap) reason for the change is that the present tense just works better. It's easier to express Link's age, as well as his thoughts with this tense. This chapter is still a little bland because I simply changed the tense and not the content, but the rest of the story should be more colorful.