He hasn't been the same. He feels so damn guilty about the whole thing, keeps saying that he should've been in that building before his partner. Told me that his life was worth less than that of his partner's. On the inside, he's torn up. Angry, guilty, hurt. He's still gentle and kind, like when I first met him. But there's this anger there, at himself, at the shooter, that wasn't there before. Inside, he can't handle the loss of another partner. Can't handle whatever the hell is going on inside his head.

On the inside, he's changed.

For better or for worse, I can't tell yet.