Lyrics from The Metro by System of a Down (which I do not own). I do not (nor do I claim to) own Fruits Basket either in any way shape or form.

LILIUM

Part 1 – The Metro

By breremarer

Kyou practically hurled himself into his seat on the train. He vaguely noted that the car started moving a few moments later. He was too busy screaming at the top of his lungs.

Stupid! He had been SO FUCKING STUPID! He’d had his chance and he blew it. Kagura wasn’t, would never be his again.

((I’m alone, sitting with my broken glass. My four walls follow me through my past.))

She had come to him first and asked him if he had any objections to the engagement. She had actually singled him out before she made the formal announcement and asked him personally. It had practically been a cry for help.

((I was on a Paris train, I emerged in London rain and you were waiting there, swimming through apologies.))

Kyou had no idea what to say. Everybody seemed to think she and that Itsuki bastard were so fucking perfect for each other. Even Akito had approved of their engagement. Nobody would have cared what the freak possessed by the cat thought about the two.

((I remember searching for the perfect words.

I was hoping you might change your mind.))

Nobody, that is, except for Kagura. He remembered the look in her eyes so clearly now. She was nearly begging him to say something. Why hadn’t he recognized the look then? He should have said something. Anything!

But he hadn’t. Kyou had said he had no objections to the engagement and walked away. He had left Kagura standing there. Alone. He ran all the way to the subway station and boarded the first train he found.

((I remember the soldier standing next to me.

Riding on the metro.))

Kyou finally stopped yelling and glanced at the train car around him. He was more than a little relieved to see that it was completely empty except for him. Kyou let his anger simmer down to a slow boil and leaned back in his seat, heaving a heavy, tired sigh.

She didn’t even love him. Kagura had probably never loved Itsuki. The engagement had been the idea of her parents. They had carefully picked out a member of the inner Sohma clan, one who Kagura had been friends with (and one who wouldn’t be unpleasantly surprised the first time he tried to hug his wife).

Itsuki was also, loathe as Kyou was to admit it, not a bad guy. He was nice, understanding, patient; everything Kyou was not. He would certainly be a good husband to anyone, but... But...

...but he wasn’t Kyou, and Kagura didn’t love him.

((I was smiling as you took my hand.

Saw the moon; we spoke in France.

You were passed the shallow words

Years have passed and still the hurt))

It had seemed like years since Kagura and Kyou had been dating. Kyou had been happy then. They had been together then.

Why had they broken up, again? Kyou didn’t remember too clearly. It had been some sort of fight; a particularly nasty fight. It had left both of them on shaky ground with each other. They hadn’t spoken to each other for months. Kyou realized with a sort of dulled shock that Kagura telling him about the engagement was the first time she had really spoken to him since their split.

((You were passed the shallow words

Years have passed and still the hurt

I can see you now, smiling as I pulled away

Sorry))

Kyou’s hands balled up into fists. He was sure Kagura was telling everyone right now. She was engaged. She was going to be married. Kyou had his chance and he blew it.

Stupid! Fucking stupid!

((I remember the letter wrinkled in my hand

"I'll love you always" filled my eyes

I remember the night we walked along the Seine

Riding on the metro))

It had been a final opening. One last opportunity to set things right between them and he had denied it. Kyou watched the colors blur on the other side of the train’s window.

He had missed it. It was gone.

((I remember a feeling coming over me

Then the soldier turned and walked away))

Kyou punched his fist into the window, cracking it. It was over. They were over.

He screamed a final time in hopeless frustration before collapsing back into his seat.

((Fuck you for loving me!

Riding on the metro))