Source of all evil: Pink Ribbon
By: Shozetsku
Disclaimer/Warnings/Authoress Notes:
Novelist: I have invited Itachi to do my disclaimer!
Itachi: Is that why I’m here? I was under the impression that I was crudely kidnapped by another of my fangirls.
Novelist: -is indignant- Just do my disclaimer you smexy bishonen!
Itachi: Fine. She owns nothing, especially not her sanity.
Novelist: Nope!
Itachi: Now what was this I was hearing about an all-you-can-eat buffet?
Novelist: -Shakes head- Itachi, if you didn’t rock so much you would totally suck. But you are too freakin’ cool to suck! The smexy way you talk, and move, and you made such a fool out of Sasuke... -trails off-
Itachi: Where’s the food?

SasuxNaru-ness! Bashing of the color pink, Sakura bashing, cursing, basic insanity, and a slight shojo-ai warning. Not for the kiddies! Oh no, not at all! -evil laughter- Sasunaru here on out baby!

Chapter 8: Meet the Parent?

Sakura readjusted the pack she was carrying. It was really bad for her back to wear the backpack so low that it covered her butt but is was the only way to ensure that Sachiko wouldn't try and pinch it or anything. She sighed exasperatedly, she hated this! Sachiko was clingy, obnoxious, pushy, completely immune to everything that Sakura tried to do to shake the girl's affections, and the worst part was that she was extremely creepy.

Sakura was so wrapped up in being miserable and playing keep as far away from Sachiko as possible that she never stopped to think about the similarities in Sachiko's behavior to her own whenever Sasuke was around.

Kurenai sighed as Sachiko tried yet again to hit on Sakura. It was slightly creepy as Sachiko was a girl but Kurenai had several friends and even more acquaintances that were homosexual for it to faze her too much. As long as it didn't endanger the priestesses that they were escorting Kurenai saw no real reason to step in. For one thing it ensured the location of at least one of the girls at all times. It had become a given that Sachiko would be within touching distance of Sakura.

Ino had taken to avoiding both of them on this long trip. It was ridiculous to her, the whole thing was completely pointless. They were walking to some special spring very far away, completely passing by well over twenty other springs. They had to stop at least once a day for hours at a time so the priestesses could pray. And they couldn't travel by boat or anything. The whole journey had to be made on foot from beginning to end.

There was a huge river not too far from the path hey were traveling that they often bathed in and they couldn't use a boat. And that was another thing! They took long baths every day, not that that was a bad thing in the least, because they had to remain pure in every sense of the word. Ino was as crazy about hygiene as the next girl, but even she wouldn't sit in the freezing cold river water scrupulously scrubbing at every inch of her body twice. The water was to cold for that.

Hinata was rather enjoying herself, the priestesses were very interesting women and had enthralling stories that they were more then willing to share. Hinata was more then eager to listen; it passed the time and she was making a lot of friends. So far there had only been one or two instances where their journey was interrupted, both times by different groups of disgusting smelling bandits. These clumsy intruders were easily dealt with as the kunoichi indulged in a little showing off for their clients. And by the request of the head priestess, they refrained from doing serious harm. Both times all the girls stopped and prayed for their attackers.

Tenten loved the outdoors; she loved nature and the fresh air. She didn't know if it was from the prayers of the preistesses or what it was but the weather had not once turned rainy or cold. It felt almost like a camping trip or a ‘girls only’ outing. And no Gai-sensei or Lee or Neji, not that she didn't like her teammates but it was just too nice to get away for a bit and just have a brief estrogen hype.

---

Back in the forests of Konoha, Neji was running through the trees. He hardly dared to believe what his Byakugan was showing him. He stopped in a clearing he hadn’t known was there before, he deactivated the Byakugan. He could see the shadow, which confirmed his assumption. But what on earth was Gaara doing in the forests of Konoha?

"Why are you here?" he asked, tho politely, remembering that Gaara was still the Kazekage. Gaara stepped forward, "I like the view." he said simply. Neji snorted, "It takes three days to get to Konoha from Suna. It must be some view." Gaara merely pointed. Neji turned around to see the Hokage monument. And the view was spectacular.

"Come back at sunset. It looks even better with a bright orange sun from behind." Gaara said quietly.

"This can't be all you come for." Neji said tearing his eyes away from the monument. Gaara smiled forlornly. Gaara didn't smile often, but for some reason this didn't feel like a smile, nor did it look like one.

"It's not all. But what I come to see isn't always here."

And with that cryptic statement Gaara turned to go. "Come back at sunset. The view really is better."

"Will you be here?" Neji asked before he could stop himself. Gaara nodded. And then he disappeared into the shadows. Neji could have easily followed him but he didn't bother to, Suna was Konoha’s ally, and Gaara was Kazekage. Besides which, Gaara was much stronger then Neji, and he didn’t seem to be there on any suspicious business.

Later, in the afternoon before sunset he pondered whether he should go back to the clearing. Curiosity won out. He wanted to see why Gaara would make a three day trip, most likely without telling anyone where he was going either. Neji stood in the clearing; he raised a hand to shield his sensitive eyes from the sun. Gaara had been right, the view really was better at sunset. He wasn't sorry he had come.

"I told you." Spoke the voice of Gaara behind him.

Neji smiled and let his hand fall to his side. "You didn't lie. Nor did you exaggerate. But I never pegged you for the sentimental type."

Gaara stepped forward until he was next to Neji, a respectful two feet of space was kept between them. "What makes me seem sentimental? I came here at first, for another reason. I just so happened to find this."

"Lucky find." Neji observed. He didn't know Gaara very well but he thought it safe to assume that Gaara was opening up, at least a bit to him. It felt nice.

"Indeed. I seem to find many things I'm not looking for when I'm searching for something else." Gaara commented. They stood in silence as the sun sank lower on the horizon and darkened to red before dropping behind the Hokage monument. Night settled in over Konoha and Gaara turned to leave.

"Are you going home?" Neji asked.

Gaara nodded, "I've been gone long enough."

Neji didn't miss the implications; that Gaara had left several days ago. That Gaara had been in Konoha for a few days at least. And that Neji shouldn't expect him back too soon.

---

Iruka sat in his apartment grading papers. He glanced at the windows. Nailed shut. The door was booby trapped and his phone was disconnected. He needed to relax. He had to finish grading the stack of papers in front of him. Just getting them out of the way would solve everything.

Almost finished, the graded pile was bigger then the ‘to be graded’ pile. He was almost there. A hand took a handful of papers and there was a person who sat down across from him at his kitchen table. Kakashi clicked a pen and went to work reading a paper and grading it. Neither man said a word. Iruka was grateful that at least this time he wasn't going to have to fight Kakashi about getting his work done.

The stack of papers dwindled down to three, two, one. There were no more papers. Iruka looked at Kakashi, Kakashi just stared back as he watched Iruka place the stack safely in his bag that he always took to school.

"Can you un-nail my windows and let me out of my own apartment now?" Iruka asked, putting his hands on his hips and stressing the last word. It had been several hours now that Kakashi had held him prisoner in his own home.

"No can do Ru-ru." Kakashi sing-songed with a playful grin beneath his mask. "There's still the matter of why I did this in the first place, now, lets have some nice uninterrupted fun shall we?"

Iruka blushed and stammered and made his best half-hearted attempt to get the older man away from him, though it was a doomed and short effort.

---

Naruto and Sasuke wandered the streets of Konoha. There was a healthy distance between the two of them and Naruto's foot was healing nicely. Sasuke refused outright to go to Ichiraku's Ramen Shop so they were trying to decide where they were going to eat. Naruto stared coldly at any boy who passed them wearing any color ribbon. They hardly ever wore them around the neck, and his was the only pink one he had seen so far. Sasuke's chuckles didn't help his mood. Sasuke tried to tell him that now he didn't stick out so much.

Naruto wouldn't listen. He tried to convince Sasuke to at least let him get another color ribbon. But Sasuke squashed that idea. Strangely enough a pink ribbon around his neck was the most appropriate color and place for it. When Sasuke told the blonde so he had to duck several sharp pointy objects aimed at him.

"But Naruto it's true. The more effeminate the color the more devoted you are to your partner. You can't get girlier then pink. And to wear your ribbon around your neck is like a promise ring, or a statement that you're lovers and you’re planning to stay with the person that gave you the ribbon."

Naruto scoffed, "Well then I really need to take this ribbon off then because Sakura is the one that got me this one. And I am most certainly NOT going near her." Naruto wasn't even fazed by the fact that no matter what anyone did he would be dead set on Sasuke for the rest of his life. He got over it.

Sasuke let loose a small chuckle, "While I'm thrilled to hear you say that, you do have a point. I don't think that I like the idea of that being Sakura's ribbon either. Tell you what. There's a shop that sells ribbons up ahead, lets get you one from me." Sasuke said suddenly very close to Naruto's ear and his warm breath playing on his sensitive skin.

Naruto's cheeks flared red, "B-Baka! Nowadays there's always a shop up ahead that sell ribbons. Damn girls and their stupid girly fads. And it's not even their fad! It's mine! I want my damn credit!"

They walked up to the little shop when something wonderful drifted past Naruto's nose. A crepe stand! Naruto pointed it out and tried to pull Sasuke towards it. But Sasuke was very intent on choosing a ribbon from the broad selection of colors. Naruto shrugged and asked what flavor Sasuke wanted; when Sasuke didn't answer Naruto went up on his own and bought himself a half chocolate half banana crepe.

When he returned Sasuke had narrowed his selection down to two different ribbons, one was the exact same color pink that Naruto was wearing at that very moment! The other one was black with intricate and very noticeable white lace edging. Naruto tried to imagine that ribbon around his neck. It put him in mind of a slutty maid with a feather duster and a waay too short skirt and matching garter belt.

"Definitely NOT!" Naruto said snatching the already cut length of black ribbon out of Sasuke's hand and slamming it down on the table. "I'll stick with the devil I know." Sasuke paid for the pink ribbon instead and then looked from Naruto, to his half eaten crepe then back to Naruto, "Where's mine?" he asked.

Naruto sniffed haughtily at him, "You didn't say anything when I asked you what you wanted so I got you nothing. Go buy your own if you really want one."

Sasuke shook his head and walked up to the crepe stand. With Sasuke gone and his back to Naruto, Naruto stole that opportunity to buy the black ribbon with white lace that Sasuke had picked out. The visual he had called to mind had given him a very naughty idea. He stuffed the ribbon away quickly and tried to recall where Jiraiya had hidden that maid outfit from his first drunken party...

---

Sasuke awoke one morning groggily to the thought that he was finally getting used to sleeping on the sofa. It was not a pleasant thought but he did have to admit that today the sofa felt really nice and comfy that morning. He had stopped bothering to count the days left that he would have to sleep on it; it was just depressing to think about. He rolled cautiously onto his side, as to not fall off, and felt something warm and alive snuggle into his chest.

On pure reflex Sasuke’s eyes snapped open as though someone had screamed in his ear. Naruto, still asleep, snuggled again into Sasuke then rolled over with a soft whine. The blonde clearly did not want to wake up for the next couple of days. Sasuke smiled, he was no longer on the couch, Unreserved Sasuke did the happy dance in a little circle. Immature Sasuke joined in with Impulsive Sasuke and they all danced and looked like fools, as Indifferent Sasuke pointed out.

Impulsive Sasuke stopped suddenly with an evil grin on his face. Immature Sasuke was hurried out of the room. Impulsive Sasuke grinned wider and whispered something in Unreserved Sasuke’s ear. Unreserved Sasuke promptly started bleeding from both nostrils. Indifferent Sasuke rolled his eyes and, sensing danger, tried to wake up Responsible Sasuke, who was no morning person.

“Hey, I just thought you might want to know that the idea of cross-dressing our Naruto is floating around this early in the morning.”

“Imm ish leepin... cummak timmara.” Responsible Sasuke mumbled groggily. Indifferent Sasuke sighed, “Jeez! Danger, Will Robinson! Red Alert! All hands to battle stations! C’mon you log, I just heard Impulsive Sasuke say ‘cross-dressing.’ And Unreserved Sasuke is going to pass out from nosebleed-related-blood-loss.” THAT woke Responsible Sasuke up.

“Cross-dressing! This early in the morning? No way, that’s happening! Why are you just standing there?” Responsible Sasuke looked incredulously at Indifferent Sasuke who sighed again, “Kamawanaiyo. I just thought you might like to know.” (Kamawanaiyo loosely translates to ‘I don’t care.’ or ‘It doesn’t matter.’)

Impulsive Sasuke stuck his tongue out at Indifferent Sasuke. “Tattletale. Whose side are you on?”

Indifferent Sasuke shrugged noncommittally, “Yours? His? Who knows? I’m just on the side of good. Besides I only wanted a level playing field.”

Sasuke tried to ignore how cute Naruto looked when he was asleep, how cute he would look in a sundress, and his growing urge to molest Naruto in his sleep. Well, his voices of reason, responsibility, and restraint were all still sleeping so, it wasn't long before he had given in.

Naruto began to become conscious of the waking world slowly to a hand massaging just the right spot on his neck, he let loose a small moan, it felt really good. His first thought was that he wouldn't mind waking up like this every morning.

Then Naruto felt the hand going under his pajama top and exploring the skin it found underneath. Naruto's eyes snapped open while his hands found those that were touching him this early in the midmorning. He grasped the wrists with unnecessary force and pulled them away from his body.

"Do you think of anything else?.!" he said sitting up in Sasuke's bed. He hadn't slept in his own apartment since that night almost two weeks ago, though neither boy minded. Sasuke chuckled softly. "I've been trying to wake you up for fifteen minutes now. I tried shaking you and everything. I just thought I might as well try this method before I threw you out of my bed."

Naruto opened his mouth to argue, sputtered incoherently, and eventually shut his mouth. Sasuke decided not to mention that he was lying through his teeth. Sasuke shifted in bed, "But since you’re awake… let's exploit this fact and the fact that we don't have any missions today." Sasuke leaned in slowly for a kiss, he expected to be pushed away, to be yelled at, to be hit, he didn't expect Naruto to grab him by his overly long bangs and mash his mouth against the brunette's.

But was Sasuke the type of man to object that his lover was kissing him after a painful week of celibacy? Perish the thought. If Naruto wanted it then it was his duty as the one who would be the only one banging the blonde to make sure he never felt neglected. Would you call Sasuke overeager? Of course not, he just took pride in his work.

He was overeager.

Then again, if those nails down his bare back were any indication, so was Naruto.

When did Sasuke lose his shirt? Where the hell were his pajama pants? When did Naruto get naked? Not that Sasuke was complaining. He wasn't the type to complain when his lover was offering sex before breakfast. Sasuke allowed Naruto to climb onto his stomach where Naruto bent down to kiss Sasuke hungrily; Sasuke found the hem of his own boxers and slid them off. He really had missed the best part of this what with thinking and all. He should do that less often.

Naruto bucked his hips hungrily into Sasuke's, letting out a throaty cry as he ground into the brunette. As Sasuke raised an eyebrow Naruto grinned, he felt something in the back of his mind stir a bit, but at the moment he didn't care.

The Kyuubi yawned and stretched as it woke up from its' two week and two day nap. It had expected to wake up to the two of them doing something like this but it didn't think Naruto would feel so desperate. To his knowledge Sasuke hadn't been given a mission, and if he had been more then likely he would have been on a team with the blonde. So if Sasuke hadn't gone anywhere why was Naruto like this? This was clearly mate-withdrawal clinginess, but how?

"Maybe I should sleep… on the sofa more often." Sasuke grinned. “If this is what I'm going to get when I get back, I'll grit my teeth and bear it." If the demon fox had hands it would have smacked one to it's forehead. If it had a corporeal wall and body it would have tried to smash its' head into the wall. Why, why was the boy so stupid! It was only April and while spring was winding slowly down, demon Kitsune… that stupid little idiot. Both of them! What was that brunette talking about? Depriving Naruto was unhealthy!

Naruto's hands possessed minds of their own. They ran themselves up and down Sasuke's chest, and fisted Sasuke's cock and massaged his balls. Naruto's hands wandered all over his own body with his eyes closed, as though the blonde was imagining the brunette touching him. He moaned softly as three fingers slipped into his mouth and he began to suck on them hungrily, Sasuke's eyes grew wider and wider as he watched Naruto prepare himself with his own fingers on Sasuke's lap. Sasuke wasn't even doing anything and he already felt like he could cum with just the visual!

Naruto positioned himself and slid down Sasuke's almost painful erection, Naruto was holding himself up with his hands on Sasuke's chest. Sasuke, unable to not participate any longer grabbed Naruto's hips roughly and tried to find that one spot that Naruto loved. The low scream that tore from Naruto's throat told he had found it. He angled himself so he would hit that spot every time, Sasuke thrust up into Naruto in time with Naruto's movements.

Sasuke grabbed Naruto's neglected cock and pumped it in rhythm with their movements. Sasuke came hard inside of Naruto and Naruto came a split second later, soiling the sheets and showering Sasuke, not that Sasuke particularly minded, he was still riding out his orgasm at the moment.

Naruto collapsed onto Sasuke's chest breathing hard. Naruto pulled his hips away from Sasuke's, and looked Sasuke in the face with much more control and calm for someone who had just had sex for the first time in a week of celibacy.

"It's good to know that he's at least chosen a mate that is appealing to look at." Naruto said in a low voice, his voice wasn't different, but his pitch was much lower then Naruto's usual melodic tones.

"What the?" Sasuke pulled himself out from under Naruto and covered himself with a blanket. Somehow he knew that this wasn't Naruto.

"Have you left Naruto alone for a long time recently, Uchiha boy?" Kyuubi asked, taking advantage of Naruto's temporary loss of consciousness.

"You're.." Sasuke broke off. He knew who this was, but wasn't the Kyuubi supposed to be sealed?

"Yes, yes! Now answer me! Did you leave Naruto alone for a long time?" the Kyuubi said irritably.

"No. we haven't been having sex but I-" Sasuke was cut off.

"What?" The Kyuubi half shouted, "Naruto's season just started! He's going to need you for the next four months at least! You can't just leave him alone like that! It's not healthy!" the Kyuubi ran Naruto's hands through Naruto's hair in frustration.

"Why the hell are you yelling at me?" Sasuke shouted back, not liking being treated like a child that didn't know anything. Which to the Kyuubi, he was. "Naruto was the one who said I couldn't touch him! Wait, I thought spring was about halfway through, why would Naruto's season have just started?"

"Because he just found his mate. Idiot. Idiot! The both of you are idiots! You can't let Naruto get too clingy to you! The chemical rushes and imbalances aren't healthy for his system. You have to make sure that he's given plenty of attention and even more during the next four months." The Kyuubi crossed Naruto's arms over the boy's bare chest, "I can't believe I actually have to tell you these things!"

The Kyuubi sighed, "You two are such uneducated cubs. Do I have to spell out all the rules for you two? Don't leave Naruto alone during his season. When he's not in heat it's ok to leave him alone for a little while but don't push it. Now, Naruto's a boy so I don't think you will have to worry abut a litter of your own but…"

Sasuke tensed, "but what?"

"But don't count on that! You never know..." The Kyuubi trailed off. Sasuke raised an eyebrow, "Hey, demon fox, are you a girl?"

Naruto bristled and it was clear that the Kyuubi took offense to the statement. "Demons are not barred by gender like humans. We are androgynous." the Kyuubi said proudly.

"Oh," Sasuke contemplated this for a moment. "Is that why you're so comfortable with this relationship?"

The Kyuubi scratched behind Naruto's ear with one hand in a very catlike motion. "I suppose so. Demon's are fewer in the world so we try to mate and produce as much offspring as possible to keep the species going. We just evolved that way."

Sasuke threw his arms over his eyes, "Great my boyfriend is possessed by a bisexual demon with a parent complex." they were both silent for a bit. "Hey Kyuubi, do me a favor and never ever do this again, especially after Naruto and I are..." Sasuke trailed off, it was awkward to talk to this demon.

"Having sex? No problem. It’s not like I wanted to wake up to the two of you doing this. But I left such reservations behind me when Naruto found his mate, namely you.” Kyuubi folded Naruto’s arms again. It wanted nothing more then to retreat back to it’s nice simple corner of Naruto’s mind, even with a humans’ diminished sense of smell he could smell the heavy scent of recent sex.

“Let me lay out some rules for you. Kitsune mate for life, they depend on their mates, they support each other when cubs are born. Demon’s are rare and try to reproduce as much as possible to keep from dying out. So don’t ever abandon Naruto during his first, and for good measure, second seasons in heat. If I catch you sleeping on the couch on purpose just so you can have better sex after the wait I’ll throttle you. Naruto’s new to his season and will be sensitive to time together and time apart. Mind you not everything is about sex. You have to support his emotional side as well. Naruto loves you in a way that is highly dangerous to humans, he loves you unconditionally. I hope you’re ready for that kind of relationship.”

Sasuke digested this. And as he did so the Kyuubi bit lightly into Naruto’s left thumb and tasted salt, “Then again, Naruto is rather young. And his human hormones haven’t settled in the slightest. So sex might be more prominent then usual. If not sex at least stimulate Naruto, he seems to like the way you, what do you humans call it? Kiss? He needs the proper chemicals flowing in his system to support being in heat. What is the premise of kissing anyways? What do you humans see in it?”

Sasuke stared at the Kyuubi as he broke of into a string of half muttered and unintelligible side comments. He really was starting to feel the awkwardness of the situation now that the shock of his-lover’s-body-being-taken-over-by-the-demon-within-him-after-a-moment-of-passion had worn off.

"Right." Sasuke was starting to want the Kyuubi gone and Naruto back by now. "You've kinda made it clear that we have to go at it like rabbits, loud and clear. Now can you please give me back Naruto."

The Kyuubi bristled, having finally had enough of Sasuke’s impudent mouth, then he smirked. "I'm going. I'm going. But before I retreat back to the lovely little corner of Naruto's mind I occupy I think you should know, you got a lot of ... Naruto on your face, you know, it's all white and such." The Kyuubi pointed a finger at Sasuke’s face and made a few circles to indicate that it was all over his face.

Sasuke, in spite of himself turned beat red as Naruto fell gently on the pillows, now suddenly asleep. He didn't dare touch his face; he just got out of bed and hurried to the bathroom to run himself a shower.

Scrubbing himself clean, wishing it was so easy to get rid of his blush, Sasuke punched the wall of the shower as the warm water cascaded down his body and he gritted through his teeth, "Stupid, perverted, bisexual demon fox with a parent complex."

End Chapter 8!

Jesus Christ, FINALLY!

This chapter gave me so much trouble I got so frustrated, I completely stopped working on it for three months. I had such writers block. If you don’t want to wait this long again for an update, I suggest you give me suggestions. Sakura’s coming back soon, tell me how you want her to get her just desserts!

This Story has been Made into a DOUJINSHI!!!! My best friend Lady Macfluff is drawing it because I can’t draw! Go look and comment on my story’s Doujin and yell at her to update and post the next frickin’ page, cause she won’t listen to me anymore! Here’s the address, just remove the spaces: www. deviantart. com/ deviation/ 45690288/

Your reviews that kept coming in spurred me to keep writing! They helped me so much to make an effort, Please review so I know I’m not just typing to cyber space.

Any requests on who should do the disclaimer next? Or does nobody even read the disclaimers anymore?

I love you all my readers and reviewers!

-Novelist