Game Over

A fic in the Physical-universe

By Mara202

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of its characters. I'm just writing this for fun, not for money.

Pairing: Harry/Voldemort (sort of... you'll see.)

Warnings/classifications: AU, weirdness, not-quite-slash, HBP spoilers (kind of)

Author's notes: This is the third fic in the Physical universe. Physical was originally supposed to be a multi-chapter fic, but after Gravitation and Electricity I decided to make a series of one-shots of it, each featuring one of the pairings I ship as the main pairing. The only thing the fics have in common is the setting: Hogwarts University of Exact Sciences.

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Harry Potter, second-year student Physics at Hogwarts University of Exact Sciences, was bored. Very bored.

Eventually he decided to try yet again to finish the computer game his friends had got him for his birthday. It was a game about a boy - who looked remarkably like him, which waswhy his friends had got him that game in the first place- who had to defeat an evil wizard named 'Voldemort' by finding the 'Horcruxes' and destroying them.

When Harry had first heard of it, he had thought it to be a stupid, silly game, but when he started playing it, he found he couldn't just stop. At the first try, when he finally got his hands on one of those 'Horcruxes' - who the hell could think of a name like that? - he died instantly because of some curse. A lot of mental - or sometimes muttered - curses later, he had finally managed to get all the 'Horcruxes' and even to destroy them, only to be killed off yet again.

The enemy was a stereotypical bad guy: ugly, white face, and with slits for a nose, but he was a lot stronger than most other enemies Harry had encountered in other computer games. He had tried every hex, jinx and curse he had learned in the course of the game, and still he kept on getting killed! What did he do wrong?

When he died yet another time at the hands of 'Lord Voldemort', with a bunch of other bad guys with the highly original name 'Death Eaters' watching and gloating, he was so frustrated that he could have thrown the computer out of the window and would surely have done so, if he hadn't thought the University would be happy if he destroyed their properties.

Instead, he racked his brains about a clue he might have missed. Had he really found and destroyed all Horcruxes? He made a mental list.

The diary? Check.

The ring? Check.

The locket? Check.

The cup? Check.

Ravenclaw's Pensieve? Check. It had taken him quite long to figure out this one. The only thing he knew, was that he had to look for something connected to one of the so-called 'founders'.

The snake? Check. That one had been particularly hard, since she was almost always near her master, which often let to Harry's untimely demise.

So, theoretically, he should be able to kill 'the Dark Lord', seeing as he had destroyed all other parts of his soul. Then why oh why didn't he succeed? What had he missed?

And suddenly, when he had finally reached the 'Final Battle' stage of the game again, he knew it. Or at least, he thought it might be the solution.

And thus, when Voldemort laughed maniacally and a challenging text appeared on the screen, Harry typed the words "Voldemort, I love you" and pushed the ENTER key.

The tiny figure on the screen started laughing hysterically, but then...

Then...

The maniacal laughter changed into a shriek as his arms and legs and body burst into flames and eventually were reduced to nothing but ashes. The last thing to go up in flames was the white, skull-like head; an expression of utmost surprise etched into his ugly features.

Harry shook his head. What a ridiculous game. Who would ever defeat their enemy with love! But, he had to admit it was cleverly done. No one would think of this right away. And as the game congratulated him on winning, Harry laughed and made a mental note to himself to thank his friends for getting him this game...

End

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So... whatcha think of this fic? Was it horrible? Funny? Weird? Something else? Please tell me! I really appreciate feedback!

Thanks for reading!