FANDOM & CATEGORY - Naruto / dark-suspense-romance
PAIRING(S) - Sakura/Kakashi. Some totally non-sexual strains of "We're just friends!" Kiba/Sakura. Yeah, right.
WARNINGS - Gore, death, sexual innuendo, torture, drug abuse.
SUMMARY - It began with a hostage recovery mission. It ended in bloodshed and death. Caught in a circle of missing medications, her companions dead for mysterious reasons, Sakura means to get to the bottom of everything, even if she has to sacrifice what little remains of her sanity to do so. Dignity - what's this thing called dignity?
DISCLAIMER: I did it for Demeter, even though I don't own any of the Naruto characters. If I did, Sasuke would be a lot less of an angtsy emo-turd. :D

NOTES: I really had completed this story on 6/29/07, and here I am, three and a half years later, finally posting what was meant to be an unofficial epilogue (really, I consider it to be a companion side-story-sequel). Well... consider this an early Christmas gift! :DDDD This is a semi-graphic lemon, and it explores a side of romance that is rarely seen in fanfiction. I think that trust is such an undervalued, underrepresented, but exceedingly important facet in any loving relationship. There's a special at the very end that doesn't have anything to do with Kakashi and Sakura. This is largely because, given Kiba's bisexuality, I wanted a gay scene.

(To be perfectly honest, I had almost all of this chapter just kind of hanging out on my computer. I finally just dusted it off, finished a few loose scenes, edited it, and then posted.)

Kakashi said nothing when he arrived on her doorstep – just came right on in and helped himself to her left-over turkey, a jar of sweetmustard in his pocket oh-so-conveniently winding up in her refrigerator "to chill" after he had slathered a generous amount onto his bread. She watched him from her kitchen table, her hands wrapped around the mug of green tea she had made herself. She hadn't yet decided if she resented his intrusion on her quiet moment of peace, as she listened to the wind moaning through the hole in her roof. (It was a sad sound, one that was lamenting the lost souls wandering in the darkness, destroyed in a single moment for someone's selfish curiosity.)

"Huh. Maybe Kiba can gather them up and make them into his own village," Inner Sakura suggested happily.

Yeah, and they could all go and settle in Naruto's missing village…

Sakura ignored the voice, ignored the chilly breeze, and concentrated on Kakashi. He was contemplating the difference between dark and light meat. She sat with her shoulders hunched, wondering when the ax was finally going to fall.

He seemed bound and determined to let her be the first to speak. Every time she opened her mouth, he tensed expectantly.

They needed to find a familiar, safe subject. "So, how was your checkup?" Sakura asked finally. Kakashi blinked at her. "The one that Tsunade did at the hospital? After you know what happened you know when?"

Kakashi crossed his arms before himself, glanced up at the hole in Sakura's roof, and then looked back at her. She had the sudden sneaking suspicion that he was smiling smugly at her from beneath that mask of his. "Tsunade said I require three days' rest and at least three invigorating massages by a qualified professional medical ninja."

Sakura twitched. "Oh, she did, did she?"

"Three massages a day."

"Oh really."

"With oil."

Oh hohohohoho. Sakura had a vision of a naked Kakashi, all slick and gleaming… Down girl!

"And candles."

Twitch twitch twitch. Naked and slick and gleaming by the soft casting light… (Must wipe away drool!)

"And soft music playing in the background-"

The fantasy spinning around in her mind came to an abrupt halt. "Oh for crying out loud-"

"I might have made that last up," Kakashi admitted reluctantly.

Sakura gripped her teacup hard. "I'm sure."

"And maybe the candles."

"Yeah."

"But the oil still stands."

"Really."

"And since you happen to have three days off and I happen to have three days off, and you are a skilled med-nin who is qualified to give invigorating massages…" Kakashi's voice trailed off; he appeared to have developed a twitch of his own.

It also appeared that Tsunade's idea of an invigorating rub was her way of saying… her way of saying…

That you two really need to get on with it and make the two-backed beast, said a snide voice that was all too much like Kiba. Because, dammit, there has been no sex for the entire adventure, and shouldn't every adventure have at least one great bout of sex?

Sakura's body decided to tingle in agreement.

Nothing more was said as Kakashi returned to his sandwich-makings. Having satisfied that appetite, he retreated, telling Sakura he would return when he completed some errands.

oOoOoOo

Sakura was already prepared for bed, wearing nothing beneath her tied-together bathrobe as she sat on the bed and brushed her hair, when Kakashi entered through her window. She had long ago resigned herself to the fact that her teammates, companions, and friends tended to have an almost-phobic aversion toward entering her home through the front door, like normal people.

Then again, she was herself hardly normal, and she did prefer to come through the front door.

As Kakashi wordlessly shucked his shoes and vest, and then languidly sprawled about on her bed, Sakura decided that being normal was for the bird. The sight of Kakashi, all lean muscle and bone, oh so generously laid out before her like a well-deserved reward for the events she had had to suffer through the past week, made a delicious warmth tingle in her entire body. She briefly considered seducing Kakashi, but realized seduction was a subtle sort of dance that she simply had no patience for at this time.

If this was why Tsunade had wanted them both to have three days off, despite the need for every available, healthy hand, then Sakura was going to take full advantage of such.

Kakashi was a man. She was a woman, fully grown and matured. Despite all that happened, her mind was back (although it still felt like it rattled around in her head in multiple pieces), her body was repairing, and she found that, somewhere along the line, she had given her heart over to Kakashi. (In truth, she have given it to Kakashi before, in a more strictly platonic sense, and he shared it with Naruto, Sai, Ino, Tsunade, and all of Sakura's precious people, but now there was a different sense in his ownership to her heart.)

So when Kakashi reached over for the blankets, Sakura pushed them out of his reach and moved to straddle his hips. Kakashi's one revealed eye widened as Sakura pressed her hands into the mattress on either side of his head, and leaned forward to softly brush her lips against the outline of his.

Kakashi's eye flickered down, lingered a moment, and then turned back to Sakura's face. She smiled wickedly and slowly ground her hips against his, as another Jounin in another time and place had once taught felt her nipples tighten as arousal began to curl in the pit of her stomach and send a slow buzzing pleasure downward.

Kakashi's eye fluttered shut. "We shouldn't," he whispered, his hands fisting the sheets.

"You 'shouldn't' have stayed at my side then."

"You need me."

Got that one right! Sakura lifted one hand and brushed it against the edges of his mask. "And you think that stopped, now that we know everything – well, except for Naruto's village. Do we go back to being alive, but lonely?" She slipped inquiring fingers beneath the mask, and slowly pushed it down. He caught her hand in one of his own and squeezed.

His breath was quickening in his chest as she undulated against him at a slightly faster speed. "There will be no going back," he whispered, a fevered look crossing his face. "I can't promise there will never be heartache, or that I will always protect you. I'm a shinobi – my path lies in bloodshed."

She bent forward and kissed the outline of his lips. "And I am kunoichi; I am med-nin. My path lies in bloodshed, because I will try and stop the flow, patch up the wounds, and heal the worst of the damage. Sometimes, I even jump into the attack to stop it, or destroy the target before there's a need for my companions to be wounded." She tugged the cloth lower. "I know what we are; there are no illusions. But I can take care of myself."

He frowned. "This whole mess happened because you couldn't."

"Which is why I need someone to watch my back." She giggled and wriggled creatively. Kakashi's hips finally bucked beneath her own and he sat half-upright, eye wide and fingers clenching at the sheets. "What? You rather I trust someone who lost an entire village?"

Kakashi tilted his head to the side, looking comical with his eye wide in surprise and mask half-off and askew. "I admit I haven't lost an entire village all at once."

"Or should I trust someone who fucked up so spectacularly that he landed in the Bingo Book as an S-class villain?"

Kakashi regarded her strangely. "Noooooo…"

Up until now, their relationship hadn't been passionate. Sakura had always expected that when she fell in love, there would be emotional fireworks, breathless rushes of hormones, and headwhirling, heartpounding, worldstopping need.

She pushed herself up on her knees, swiftly undid the belt on her bathrobe, and pushed the garment off her body. She tossed her hair over her shoulder, knowing that lifting her body put her chest directly within the line of his vision, and lifting her arm did interesting things to various parts of her anatomy. "I've been very patient with you," she said. Finally! cried the tingly bits in exhilarated triumph. We get some action!

"Have you now?"

She finally tugged the mask off and flipped it over her shoulder, not caring where it landed when she had a pair of very fine lips to explore first with her fingertips, feather-light and in wonder, and then with her own lips. She ducked her head to kiss him again, pushing eagerly against his mouth. A large hand, fingers callused but gentle, trailed up her side before finally cupping a breast. Her entire body tingled in response.

Being a kunoichi and med-nin, Sakura was used to the exhilaration of adrenaline-infused fights to the death and fights to stop death. She had expected that falling in love with be the same sort of exhilaration – not this steady stream of warmth and fondness, of basking in such a rare of stability in her life.

She ground against him again, breaking their lips apart. She tried to sound seductive, but couldn't manage with the giddy giggling. "I've had you in my bed for these past few days and only now get to do anything."

"I commend you on your patience." She grabbed his head between her hands and pressed her lips against his forehead, words breathless between the stolen kisses. His other hand rose up to grip her hip, fingers pressing against the hollow. "Undoubtedly it will be worth the wait for both of us."

After the rollercoaster of emotions and questionable sanity this latest adventure had brought, Sakura realized that such a reliable, stable love in her life was far greater than any explosion of passionate romance. Explosions, after all, left a lot of destruction in their wake, and were quick and fleeting.

"It got frustrating at times." She blinked as unexpected tears stung her eyes. She squeezed them shut and tried not to think of so many lost opportunities, but instead of the here, the now, the moment, the oooooh – hot wet mouth! Mmmmmmm~

Sakura's eyes flickered open and she buried her hands in Kakashi's soft hair as he sucked and gently scraped with his teeth. The pleasure burned a steady path to the junction between her legs, spiraling and coiling. Savor the tingle. "No more talking?" she asked breathlessly.

"Keep talking," Kakashi said around her nipple. He pulled back and blew on it, and she shivered. He switched to the other. "I like the sound of your voice." He looked up at her long enough to wink. "Besides, it won't be long before you can't talk."

"Someone has confidence." Savor the tingle. Sex is about climbing the peak, the fun of getting there. Kakashi's hands explored her naked body, mouth following here and there, nipping and licking. She sighed as her own hands slid from his head to his neck, and then stopped at the collar of his shirt. "Why am I the only one undressed here?" she demanded petulantly, tugging at the shirt without wanting to rip it from his body. Most men tended to be a little cowed at the sight of her strength, although Kakashi had never once been anything more than proud (and occasionally intimidated) of it.

Nonetheless, she didn't want Kakashi to get the idea that she was out to club him over the head and drag him back to her lair.

As if reading her thoughts, Kakashi grabbed a fistful of his shirt and yanked it up and over his head with less than a second's worth of detachment from where he was slavering attention to one breast, his free hand massaging her coccyx. Mmmm. She couldn't decide if she wanted to press back at his free hand, arch into his mouth, or undulate against his hips Once that pinnacle is overcome, the tingle becomes a quick burst and is then gone – fleeting; really, not even worth the effort sometimes. So savor that tingle.

With a broad expanse of muscle and skin to stroke, Sakura set about to doing it. She enjoyed the feel of his scarred skin beneath her hands, the play of muscles as they rippled and jumped. But she craved to do more. She wanted to consume him – fill her senses with his essence until he marked her with his scent, touch, and taste. She wanted to bear his bruises as marks of triumph – wanted the world to know how intimately he had taken her and she had allowed him.

Kakashi's hands were slipping lower and lower, and her arousal burned hotter. She wanted to draw it out as long as she could, but her impatience was rearing its ugly head. She hurriedly guided his hand to the junction between her legs. Her hips twitched as the fingers slid, massaged, and finally curled. She occupied her hands by massaging his flesh, kneading at the chakra points and the line of his neck and chest. Don't take much to get a man excited – a flash of skin, the touch of warmth and slick flesh—

She drew his face up for another kiss, and tentatively drew her fingers along the edge of his forehead protector. He frowned unhappily at that, so she pressed her fingertips against the underside of his jaw and slowly settled herself down, trapping his hand beneath and within, and settling upon his own heat. –see, Sakura, we guys get off much easier than you gals. So use us like a toy. Believe me when I say all we have to do is settle back, grin, and go along for the ride. And we'd enjoy every moment of it.

With an impatient grunt, Kakashi slid a hand beneath one pale thigh and rolled them over, pinning Sakura beneath him. He worked his other hand free from her and hooked a thumb under his waistbands. "Are you sure?" he asked.

Sakura stared breathlessly at him, and then planted a chaste kiss on his lips.

But I can't possibly tell you what it means to top. None of us like to turn our backs to the doors and expose ourselves, even in sex - not shinobi; not kunoichi.

"I am – but are you?"

His one eye crinkled merrily as he smiled brightly. "Naturally!" She helped him push the clothes down and kick them out of their way. She really couldn't tell who was purring as their long limbs tangled and tugged until his lanky body fit against hers, line against line, curve filling crook. It was hot – so very hot – and Sakura felt like she was being smothered by the heat and the protectiveness and oh, the pleasure that made her tingle everywhere and her toes curl in delight.

If you find someone special enough, willing to pleasure you and shield your body from possible attack at the same time?

When Kakashi finally entered her, his heat matched her own. She angled and rolled her pelvis to meet each thrust, his pace slowly growing in speed and intensity. Lips mashed together, more for contact than for pleasure, eyes closed and each gasping breath drawing air from the other like drowning swimmers. Suffocation – he was sucking life from her just as she was consuming him, the fire burning, burning. Sharing together, two becoming one.

Don't let them go, hear me? Watch their back, always caring and always protecting. Never let them go. Grow old, Sakura, you and whomever you chose.

The tingle was spreading through her arms, her very fingertips prickling as she pressed further against him, as if their bodies could meld together like soft wax. "More," she whispered against his lips. "Take more - all of me." Becoming one, because two are inadequate. His fingernails clawed the outside of her thigh, a salty contrast to the sweet, pain and pleasure mixing together and balancing as spice, as he drew her leg up and over one shoulder to gain depth. The tingle had become a throb; she felt her vaginal walls spasm repeatedly, and her hips rolled hard against Kakashi's as she concentrated on that delicious sensation.

Grow old and die in bed together, preferably after coitus.

Balancing like light and day, old and young, new and used. A spring was tightening in her abdomen as the throbs became harder with Kakashi's strokes.

Savor the tingle. Savor it –

Balancing like love and hate. Balancing like life and death, the path of the shinobi, the decision of the kunoichi. Ying and yang. Pleasure of the healed body amidst the pain of shattered mind.

savor it –

The spring snapped, and Sakura squeaked and gasped as her climax swept through her like a torrential flashflood. She rode the sensations through, and eased into a floating simmer of tingling afterbuzz. She clasped both hands to Kakashi's face as he rolled against her hips and savored the feel of her climax, muscles clamping and milking around him. After another half-minute of thrusting, he shuddered to a halt; his eye pressed tightly close and his body relaxed suddenly with its own peak reached and realized.

"Stay with me," she whispered and clung as he drew back.

He fumbled around for a moment before he finally grasped the sheets. It took some tugging to untangle them from beneath Sakura before he covered them both. She admired the way the muscles of his arms bunched with the effort and movement. "Of course."

Kakashi swiftly fell asleep, his hand tangled in her hair and hers pressed against his navel. Just as Sakura was drifting off, she felt the brush of something against the shell of her ear, and the whisper of Kiba's voice.

"Glad to know you won't be needing any more tutoring."

Sakura would have cheerfully strangled him, except she somehow knew that the first time she and Kakashi had sex, there would be someone's voice softly guiding her through that first time, marking it as something special because that voice recognized when something was more than just mindless sex; when it was something more than just two lonely people sharing a quick moment of togetherness.

Or two people trying not to get caught in a brothel…

She lifted herself up long enough to study Kakashi's still face before snuggling close.

As bedmates went, he was better than the average lover. He only stole the blankets twice.

SPECIAL SIDE STORY OF SIDE STORY

Sasuke settled once more in the ear-shell of the great stone statue, fitting his lank body to the curves and crooks of stone. He flopped his stiff arms across his chest and closed his eyes for some much-needed rest, ready to bury the monster that lurked in the background of his mind.

But the problem with resting was that visitors often prevented such.

One sharingan eye opened. "What do you want?"

Kiba floated closer. "To give a hedonistic blowjob!"

Sasuke crossed his legs and shuddered. "I may be a cold prick, but there's no way that frigid mouth of yours is coming anywhere near it."

Kiba waved a hand in annoyance. "People always think that ghosts are cold - I'll have you know that I'm an incorporeal being of energy: neither hot, or cold."

Sasuke was silent for a moment. "What about Sakura?"

"I refuse to enter someone else's territory. Contrary to most rumors, the only married or claimed persons I ever fucked were in brothels, and only then because everything there is fair game." Kiba floated within reach and smothered Sasuke with an upside-down kiss. Sasuke pressed in to it with all the eagerness of a corpse that wasn't an Inuzuka. "Can you feel that?"

Sasuke shook his head. "Not really. Although you being a ghost may have little to do with that. My body has been numb to external stimuli ever since the monster took up residence." He watched Kiba's hand trail down the length of his body and slip under his trousers. "I feel detached from that, too."

Kiba tongued Sasuke's ear. "You might feel less detached if you actually uncrossed your knees. But, see, what I like about you is the fact that you can go for hours. Granted, it takes three hours of foreplay just to get a response, but I'm hoping for a quickie this time! Two hours total ought to be enough. Well, quickie for you," he added as an afterthought.

Sasuke sighed. "My life is pathetic."

"You'll hardly find a living soul with my expertise."

He laughed at that and shook his head at Kiba's ego. "You're almost as bad as Naruto when it comes to stubbornness." Sasuke settled back against the rock and spread his thighs, and Kiba lightly settled between them. "I've got all day - we'll see how far this gets."

"Hmmm?"

"It's rude to talk with your mouth full," Sasuke said, cocking his head to the side with a detached expression in his eyes.

Kiba cheekily waved a hand overhead. "Hmmm!"

"But keep doing it anyway. I think I can feel that."

"Mmm-mmm!" Kiba lifted his head. "By the way, I saw Mom leaving." He went cross-eyed. "Hey! You're wilting!"