Disclaimer: I in no way own, endorse of fund Rockstar or Take-Two Interactive or their GTA franchise, and am in no way profiting from writing this piece.

“Rampage”

Heading out by dawn’s early light

Half the population decimated by tonight

Some of fear, some of fright

As long as they’re dead

My adrenaline’s fed

What a great pleasure

Killing at my leisure

The AK-47 is

The way to your heaven

Will you be wearing a frown?

As you and countless others are gunned down?

No, said a ho

So I killed her first

Diving into my Cheetah

Speeding down the road

The engine mercilessly guzzling litre after litre

Hey look, a squirrel!

Look, ma, I made ROADKILL!

Woo!

Flattening pedestrians as they try to run

It sure is a lot of fun

Releasing frustration

My activities enraging the outside nation

I’ve killed half a dozen

Perhaps I mistakenly killed my cousin

I never liked him anyway

It seems my huge buzz

Has attracted the attention of the local fuzz

They chase me through the streets and alleys

Hey look, there’s Aunt Sally!

SCREEECH!

Whoops!

I didn’t mean it, honest!

I speed for the airport

Now there’s a good thought

My merciless killing, my mindless blood spilling

It’s not over

Thundering through the gate

There’s no time to wait

As I leap off of the ramp and fly

The dumb cops behind me try imitation

…And unfortunately die

Screeching onto the tarmac, I speed for the jet

That’s where I need to get

The pigs keep pursing me

Why, I’ll never know

But I’ve really got to go

Braking beside the Shamal

I fire a shot through the copper’s windshield and kill some guy named Hal

Rushing into the cockpit

I wonder if the cops’ underwear isn’t fulla shit

I’m a maniac, ya see

That’s the way I do things

Even as the little buttons go zing and ding and ping

Sitting down, strapping myself in

Perhaps I’ve caused too much din

Nah, I can always continue

The blood will continue to spew

I’ll never give up!

All must suffer!

Taxiing onto the runway

The cops know I’m not here to stay

But at some point, everybody’s gotta pay

Firing up the engines, I’m good to go

Shooting down the runway, the air in good flow

Nearly ready to pull up

When something makes me quickly shuttup

Is that a tank?

Am I so much of a plank?

Did they just fire a shell?

Well, I’m going straight to hell…

The plane goes boom

My doom

Gloom

Fade in

I’m not dead!

Saved!

Get ready, world, here I come again…