Wake Up Call

The rock formations that loomed in the distance were accentuated by the light of the rising sun, which was rapidly reflecting an increasingly blinding glare as the sun rose higher and higher over the horizon. Angelica had already donned her pair of pink Lolita sunglasses, but Chuckie was forced to make due with the overhead shield. Howling desert winds whipped small clouds of sand across the road at intervals, but it was nothing to be concerned about. Still, the heat was dry. Angelica knew that the two of them would probably have to stop at a convenience store to stock up on water before hitting the strip. Which was probably just as well; Chuckie wasn’t looking his best already. The pallor of his skin seemed paler than usual to her. “Feeling a little warm, Finster?” Angelica asked as they continued to drive into the morning sun.

“How much longer until we get there?” Chuckie asked, panting a bit and turning up the fan on the air conditioning.

“Maybe an hour.” Angelica revealed, giving her Acura a little more gas. “I’m going to gun it a bit, because it’s going to get really hot really fast. I told you not to linger so long in that damn hotel!”

“I didn’t linger! Angelica, you snuck into the bathroom and turned the hot water off while I was in the shower!”

“Only to make you get your ass in gear! I have to do everything for you!”

“You mean you have to do everything to me!” Chuck rebutted.

“Whatever.” Angelica rolled her eyes. “Just admit that you’d be lost without me.”

“I’d be safer without you is more like it!”

“Geez, what crawled up your pasty butt this morning?”

“I’m tired, Angelica. My sleep cycle is all out of whack!”

“That’s the whole point of going to Vegas, Chuckie. You’re supposed to stay up all night, painting the town red. Where’s your sense of adventure?”

“I think I left it back at the coffee house.” Chuck said meekly.

“Come on, Finster. For once in your life, try not to be you.”

“I can’t help who I am!”

“You don’t have to change who you are. Just try not to be so much like yourself, that’s all.”

“Okay, now I’m confused. Was that supposed to be an insult!” Chuckie asked.

Angelica smirked, reveling in the boy’s naivete. “If you have to ask, you’ll never know.”

“I should’ve known.” Chuck shook his head.

“Got that right.” Angelica’s voice was smug, belying the innate feeling of superiority she seemed to manifest in these situations. Once again, Chuckie found himself ponder why he put up with the blonde. The fear that what she had said in the Java Lava was right, that she had indeed made him. It might explain his otherwise inexplicable penchant for striving to please a girl who usually gave him nothing but grief. She was just so hard to deny, even when his instincts told him to run screaming in the opposite direction. Some sort of innate pheromone she possessed, allowing her to lure flies into her spider web. And he was probably going to end up being her next dinner.

“Why do I always listen to you?” He whined.

“Because I’m older and I know better.” Angelica stated simply. Of course. Things were always simple for her. She never had to pay any attention to the destruction left in her wake. Or even those that were loyal to the end for her, like Harold. Now there was a guy who carried a torch for Miss Pickles like no other. No matter how many times she reminded him of his chances, Harold always remained true to Angelica in his heart. But Chuckie doubted that the blonde appreciated it, or even noticed. It wasn’t in her nature.

“Why not Harold?” Chuck asked, already regretting the consequences that this conversation might lead to.

“Excuse me?” Angelica asked, indicating her displeasure through the tone of her voice.

“Why me, instead of Harold? Don’t you owe him for all that he’s done for you?”

“Not that it’s any of your business, but no, I don’t owe Harold. I gave him an old pair of my pajamas last year and he’s been happy ever since. Says that he sleeps better too. I just hope that he isn’t sleeping in them.” She muttered at the end of the sentence.

“Don’t you think it’s kind of cruel to indulge his fantasies? Aren’t you just giving him false hope?”

“What is this, some kind of lame-o guilt trip? It’s not like I’ve ever inferred that there’s a future between us. Harold’s a nice guy, maybe too nice for his own good. But there’s nothing between us at all except for a friendship of sorts. At least, not on my part. Maybe I do use him, sometimes, but that’s what he wants. He makes himself available to me. So what if I don’t love him for it! Is that my fault? Am I supposed to take pity and get involved with every guy that has a crush on me?

“No, and this is different. Maybe it’s not your fault, exactly. But doesn’t it make you feel bad?”

“It doesn’t make me feel anything.” Angelica shrugged.

“Nothing at all?” Chuckie gasped.

“Nope. How Harold lives his life, that’s his business and no one else’s. And if he wants to spend it fantasizing about me, well, it’s his prerogative. Anyway, I’ll be going to college soon, and a different one than him. I’m sure he’ll meet someone there sooner or later.”

“But what if he ends up all alone? Someone should so something for him, and I think that someone should be you!”

Angelica growled, vowing not to let herself explode all over the boy so early in her trip. The effort took considerably more willpower than she cared to admit. “That’s the problem with you, Finster. You can’t save the world, you know. The best you can do is try to get through life without going crazy. Enjoy yourself while you’re here. I always do.”

“I’ll never understand you, Angelica. I just know it.”

“And I’ll never understand you either, Chuckie. Maybe that’s the whole point. Have you ever met someone who really understands you? Lots of people will claim to, but the simple fact is that the only person who can understand you is you.

“That’s a pretty bleak outlook.”

“No, it’s a truthful outlook. Contrary to what you might think, I know what I’m talking about.”

“Most of the time, you’re too busy trying to fake us all out to be bothered with the truth.”

“Truth.” Angelica huffed, rather unimpressed. “Truth is subjective, Chuckie. It changes all the time. Everyone’s truth is different. I mean, look at me. You’re afraid of me, I know that. I can smell it all over you. And you should be afraid. You know what I can do to you. And yet, you’re still here with me. Now why do you suppose that is, hmm? Because I’ll bet it’s something you just can’t resist. You may be a fraidy-cat extraordinaire, but you like to be scared, don’t you try to deny it. That’s what kees you coming back for more. That’s why after all these years, you’ve never made me stop. It’s that feeling you get at the height of your fear, when you sense it passing and you realize that you’re still alive. And that’s why you’re here now. For that special blend of Angelica torment that you’ve known and loved since the day we first met. Am I wrong?”

Chuckie didn’t say anything for several moments. Even entertaining the possibility that Angelica could be right was almost too much for him to bear. He swallowed twice, then said the only response he could think of. “I thought you just got through saying how no one else can understand me but me. Now you’re trying to say that you understand me!”

“I never said that I understand you, Chuckie. I just know you. Seventeen years I’ve put into you. I know you better than you know yourself.” Angelica smirked at her companion’s predictable response. “Don’t look so surprised. You know just as much about me. My strengths and weaknesses. The difference between us is that I use them. You don’t. And that’s why I’m driving the Acura, and you’re riding shotgun.”

“Is this your way of telling me that you’re in the driver’s seat?” Chuckie rolled his eyes.

“Of course not. It’s my way of saying that I’m taking you for a ride.” The sun began to shine in Chuckie’s eyes, and he shut them tight in an effort to block the rays out. How he managed to survive the ride into the city limits remained a mystery to him for some time. The thing he remembered was being nudged by Angelica, whose expression betrayed her dichotomy. She seemed both relieved and annoyed when he opened his eyes, a cross between a somewhat motherly concern and a too cool to care attitude. The blonde thrust a bottle of water towards him, pressing it lightly to his forehead. “Drink it slowly.” Angelica stated. “Unless I miss my guess, you’ve got a mild case of sun poisoning. Just take it easy and you’ll be fine. I got it once when I was nine.”

Chuckie stared uneasily back at his companion. Angelica looked more worried than she was trying to sound. She took his hand and placed it over the bottle so she could release it, then rummaged around in a plastic bag. “You have no idea how hard I had to look to find a pair of snap-on sunglasses that would fit these frames of yours! You’d better not lose them, Finster!” Angelica growled, snatching Chuck’s glasses off his face before he could reach. She snapped the tinted lenses in place, then pushed the glasses back over his eyes, hooking the stems behind his ears. “I got you a strong sunblock, too. We’ll take care of that as soon as we get a hotel room. Don’t worry. You’ll be fine.” Chuck blinked at her twice, but didn’t say anything. “Hey! You answer me when I’m talking to you!” Angelica insisted, sounding more worried than annoyed. “Don’t go to your happy place on me, Finster. Stay with me. I’ve got the air conditioner up as high as it’ll go. It won’t be much longer until we’re there. Just hang on, okay?” Angelica started the car and blasted the air conditioning, pushing all of the vents onto the red-head. “Just say something, Chuckie.” Angelica never let up as she backed her car out of the space.

“Feel sick.” Chuckie managed to squeak out.

“Just hold on, okay?” Don’t drift off on me. I’ll tell you a story. Like when we were kids. So, there once was a beautiful princess named Angelica. The kind and queen loved her very much, and when she grew older, they appointed her a group of knights and maid-servants to do whatever she wanted. Her knights were known as Sir Thomas the Brave, Sir Phillip the Socially-Challenged, and Sir Charles the Hopeless. They lived in the castle with their fair and benevolent princess and her ladies in waiting—Lady Lillian the Elegant, Lady Kimiko the Fierce, and Lady Susie the Righteous. Susie liked to put on singing shows in the courtyard. She was good, but everyone in the royal court knew that Princess Angelica was even better. But of course, it wouldn’t be proper for a princess to perform in public, so Angelica was content to let Susie be the star. Sir Thomas was fortunate enough to be related to the royal family, and his squire, Dylan, along with his best friend, Sir Charles, enjoyed the grace and generosity of the princess’ company.

But their peaceful lives were interrupted by a fierce enemy, who vowed to storm the castle and topple their kingdom. The royal knights feared not their enemies, for their loyalty to the princess knew no bounds, and—CHUCKIE!” Angelica shrieked, noticing that the boy had nodded off, which she recalled was not good at all in his current condition. She slammed on the brakes for an oncoming red light, stopping only to breathe twice. She grabbed the neglected water bottle and furiously unscrewed the top, pouring some of the water over his head. “Stay with it Finster!” She yelled at him. I can already see the Camelot from here. Only two casinos past that and we’re there. Angelica slapped his face a few times, making his eyes flutter open. “You stay awake, Chuckie. I saw enough crap working as a Candy Striper. You are not going to be another one of those bad memories. Do you hear me!”

Chuckie nodded weakly at her. Angelica frowned. He still looked pale and somewhat shaky, but at least he was awake. “Okay, I get your point. No more stupid fairy tale stories. Tell you what. You promise to stay awake, and I’ll tell you the story about how my delightful little cousins decided to settle a score with me three years ago by making off with a very special drawer of mine. The little monsters. I don’t know where they picked up such treachery.”

Despite his week condition, Chuckie managed something of a hard stare. “Okay, fine. So maybe I’ve set some examples and built up some resentment in him over the years. But I’m still their cousin, and cousins don’t steal each other’s underwear drawers!” A sound that resembled an explosion came from Chuckie, and Angelica had to glance in his direction to confirm that he was laughing. “You think that’s funny!” Angelica did her best to sound annoyed, but anyone who knew her well would’ve known it was an act—she wasn’t intense enough to be truly upset. “They took the whole drawer! I mean literally! I came home and the entire drawer was just missing from my dresser! There was a sticky note from Tommy on my mirror with his blackmail demands.” Angelica flicked the right turn signal on and crossed two lanes of traffic, causing several cars to honk their horns, drivers making rude gestures at her as she passed. But in the end, they made room, and Angelica pulled into the Mandaly Bay complex, speeding around to the entrance for the Four Seasons hotel. “I never did get my favorite two-piece swimsuit back.” Angelica muttered as she drove up to the valet parking stand in front of the lobby, underneath the canopy. “Okay, we’re here. Now, this is the hard part. It’s going to be really hot out there. It’s only a few steps to the door. Can you make it?”

“Do I have a choice?” Chuck croaked.

“Not really.” Angelica said quietly. “Don’t do anything yet. I’ll come around to your side and get you.” She threw her door open, climbed out, and shut it just as quickly behind her. She left the engine running to keep the air conditioning on, then walked to the other side of the car. Angelica opened the door and depressed the button to release his seat belt. “Come on!” She grunted, pulling the teenaged boy to his feet, trying to ignore the oppressively hot air. It was slow going, but she eventually prevailed. Chuckie staggered forwards, and Angelica struggled to keep him balanced, hooking his armed with hers and marching him towards the lobby doors. He tottered a few times, but Angelica kept him upright. She was beyond relieved when the industrial strength air conditioning inside the building washed over them. Angelica dragged the Finster boy to an elegant sofa positioned in front of a vent. She allowed him to half hall onto it, but Chuckie seemed to possess enough strength to maneuver himself into a lying position. “Stay here and get frosty. I’ll get you a damp cloth.” She returned to the car, fetching her pocketbook and the keys, tossing the latter to the valet, who was already unloading her luggage from the trunk. She then ran back inside and ventured into the ladies room, grabbing a handful of paper towels and running them under cool water. She then returned to her patient, applying them to his forehead. “Rest up. I’ll get us a room.”

Angelica went to the front desk and waited her turn stoically. Being a hotel with an average room charge of five hundred dollars a night, Angelica was not forced to wait for ever long. “Welcome to the Four Seasons.” A serious yet cordial looking steward greeted her.

“I’d like a parlor room for two, please.” Angelica smiled.

“And how long do you plan on staying?”

“A few weeks. Or until our luck runs out, whichever comes first.” She opened her purse and slid her wallet out, handing over the platinum card that she had “borrowed” from her mother. She reminded herself several times to sign the invoice as Charlotte Pickles, yet she still nearly brought the adventure to a screeching halt when she started out her signature with an A instead of a C. Angelica recovered quickly, transforming the offending letter with some illicit forgery skills that she had used on more than one report card while growing up. She smiled like a Cheshire cat as the slip was placed in the drawer. Another crime successfully pulled off.

Two keycards were placed in front of her, and she took them happily. She gratefully accepted the help of a bellhop, and the young man eagerly set out to fulfill her request. Slinging her pocketbook over her shoulder, Angelica approached her patient, flashing him a mischievous grin. “There, we’re all checked in. Now all we have to do is wait for the transportation I’ve arranged. So, how are you feeling, hmm?”

“Queasy.” Chuckie sighed.

“Isn’t that like normal for you?” Angelica asked, spreading her arms out.

“Very funny.” Chuck shot her a dirty look.

“I thought so. Ah, your chariot awaits.” Angelica inclined her head as the bellhop from earlier came up to them with a luggage trolley.

“You must be joking.” Chuckie shook his head.

“Well what did you expect! That I was going to carry you up the stairs to our room? You’re not my bride, Finster!”

The nameless bellhop scratched his head. “Okay, now I’m confused.”

“You’re confused?” Chuckie raised an eyebrow. “I have to deal with her almost every day of my life!”

“Wanna walk home?” Angelica threatened. “Because believe me, I’d be happy to arrange for it!”

“Can we just go to the room now?” Chuckie moaned, climbing onto the cart. Both men did their best to ignore the angry blonde woman’s rants as they made their way towards the elevators.

OoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooO

Chuckie opened the door before Angelica had even retrieved her keycard from the slot, and immediately ran into the room, sprawling himself out on one of the double beds. Angelica sighed as she rummaged around in her purse for her wallet again, favoring the bellhop with a ten spot. “Thanks for the lift.” She smiled, entering the room. “Bring up our luggage and I’ll double that for you.” And she shut the door with a wink. She immediately turned her attention to Chuckie, who was obviously still recovering. But he looked much more comfortable on the bed. “Take off your shirt.” She said bluntly, moving over to the wide window and pulling the huge drapery tight, so that it blocked out every inch of sunlight.

“Um, I don’t usually sleep in the nude Angelica.”

The blonde grimaced, resisting the urge to throw something at him. “You’d damn well better not! Because you sure as hell won’t be doing it while you’re staying with me! I need to put the sunblock on your back, Chuckie. Don’t get strange ideas. Yeesh!”

“Oh. Right.” Chuckie sighed nervously, but then slowly complied with her wish, but he still felt self-conscious.

“Okay, now sit up. This isn’t a tanning parlor, you know.” Angelica removed the sunscreen from her pocket book and crossed the distance to the bed. She sat on the edge of it, and Chuckie turned his back to her. Angelica quietly squeezed the lotion into her hands and worked it into her companion’s back, grunting in frustration as he kept leaning forwards. “Finster! If you keep leaning away from me, I can’t do this!”

“I’m sorry, but you keep pushing me with your hands, so I keep moving!”

“Well for once in your life, why don’t you push back, hmm?” She arched an eyebrow, then continued her work, a little more forcefully than she had before.

“Hey, that feels kinda nice.” Chuckie’s voice trailed off. . .

“Oh, please. Massages cost extra, Chuckles.”

“How much extra?” He leaned his head back and shut his eyes.

Angelica moved up to his shoulders and rubbed the lotion that remained on her hands into them. She lowered her lips next to his ear, grinning. “More than you’ll ever be able to afford.” She whispered, then gave him a good push with her hands, knocking him onto his side. “Here.” She said simply, tossing the bottle of lotion next to him. “I think you can manage to handle the rest.”

“Um, right. Sure.” Chuckie said in a measure of quiet relief and disappointment.

“Good. Now, after our luggage gets back, I’m going to go find out if the spa is as good as I remember. You just stay here and get some rest. Now that we’re inside, it’s safe enough for you to relax. If you really need me, use the phone on the nightstand and call down to the spa, okay?”

“All right. Thanks for the nursing, Angelica. I feel a lot better now.” Chuckie said sheepishly, feeling a bit awkward at the situation but glad that he was well again.

“I’m not your nurse, Finster.” Angelica said darkly, a voice that frightened Chuck. She didn’t sound annoyed or frustrated, she sounded. . .foreboding.

“Don’t be silly, Angelica. It’s a little hard to believe, but you actually took care of me. You’d make a great nurse! Thank you.”

“I told you not to call me your freaking nurse!” Angelica yelled angrily, causing poor Chuckie to wince. Her fists clenched at her sides.

“I’m sorry, I only thought-”

“I don’t care what you thought!”

Chuckie swallowed, realizing that Angelica was being very serious. “What’s wrong, Angelica?”

“Leave it alone.” She said coldly, turning her back on him and opening her suitcase, removing some of her outfits and organizing them for the closet in an effort to busy herself.

“But I want to know. If it bothers you, I’d like to understand.”

“I won’t tell you again.” She threatened. “Get off it. Now!”

“No.” Chuckie surprised himself, knowing he would likely learn to regret the decision.

“No!” Angelica asked, unable to believe her ears. She ran over to the bed in a rage, confronting the red-head with her eyes. “Where the hell do you get off saying no to me!”

“Where do you get off being so angry over nothing?”

“I’ll be angry if I want to be!” Angelica yelled, piercing the boy with her eyes.

“Fine. Be angry. But you tell me why, Angelica!”

“Why should you care!”

“Because I do! I have to live with you on this trip, remember!”

“Okay, time out. Since when did you grow a backbone!”

“Tell me.”

“Fine!” The blonde hollered. “You want to know why, I’ll tell you why! Not that I expect you to understand! It was over two years ago. I used to be a volunteer at the hospital.”

“I think Tommy’s mom mentioned that once. . .”

“Are you going to interrupt me, or are you going to listen!”

“Sorry. . .”

“Now, as I was saying. . .”

OoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooO

“Hey, Candy Striper!” The voice rang in Angelica’s ears. It was disembodied and unfamiliar to her. Perfect. Who was going to take time out of their day to yell at her now?

“What?” Angelica asked, turning around and trying to make eye contact with the person who had called out for her. It didn’t take very long. A doctor was walking towards her, looking a bit the worse for wear, moving briskly yet sullenly as though the wait of the world was on his shoulders.

“What’s your name?” The doctor asked, sparing her the briefest of smiles. He was young, and clearly looked lost, yet he was determined to give off an air of false bravado.

“Angelica.” She said flatly. Great. Some kid out of college who was probably only calling her out to try and hit on her. Not that she had a problem with doctors, but she didn’t have the patience for a boyfriend in her life at the moment.

“How old are you?”

Angelica rolled her eyes. This guy certainly wasn’t one to waste time. What a perv. She waited a moment before answering, savoring the disappointment she knew he would feel when he realized that she was underage. What an ass. Did he think that because he carried a clipboard, he was suddenly God’s gift to women? “Sixteen.” Angelica smirked, waiting for him to realize that he’d just made a fool of himself.

“Perfect. Consider yourself drafted.”

“Excuse me?” Angelica asked, not quite sure what had just happened.

“I need your help. We’re drowning out there. You heard about the accident?”

“With the school bus that flipped over?” Angelica asked. “Yeah, are those kids okay!”

“Some are. Not enough. Anyway, the ER is overflowing with the cases coming in from that one.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.” Angelica dropped her arms to the sides. She wasn’t an especially compassionate person, but she certainly didn’t walk around, wishing disaster on children.

“Gets worse, I’m afraid. That accident has the main roads backed up from here to Timbuktu. Most of the nursing staff for tonight can’t get in. And there aren’t enough of the current shift nurses to go around. I need you to fill in.”

Angelica felt like a deer in the headlights. “Um. . .not that I don’t want to help, but I’m afraid I’m not qualified to be a nurse. I’m not even in a student nursing program.”

“Oh, we don’t expect you to treat anyone. That’d be a lawsuit waiting to happen. I just need you to walk with me and carry stuff, get the files, maybe fetch me some coffee when I’m crashing.” He smiled weakly.

“Well. . .”she pondered the request for a moment or two before deciding. “Alright, I guess I could do it. There’s only so many pillows I can fluff in a day anyway.”

“That’s the spirit. Alright then, you’re with me.”

“Okay, Doctor. . .um, what’s your name?”

“Doctor Aiken. But you can just call me Cliff. Trust me, we won’t have time for more syllables than that.”

“All right then, Cliff, lead the way.”

OoooooooooooO

An hour later, Angelica was beginning to regret her decision. It wasn’t Cliff. He was great. Or at least, as good as anyone could be in his situation. It was the things she was seeing that were starting to get to her. This was the side of a hospital that no one should have to see. No wonder people often looked up to doctors as gods of a sort. She didn’t know how someone like Cliff could go through this five or more days a week. It was the reality that was getting to her. Every bed she stood next to alongside the doctor was different. Angelica did everything that was asked of her. She fetched the charts, she carried things, she held tubes in place. It was the things she didn’t want to do but couldn’t help that haunted her. The way the patients would study her as the doctor made his decisions—ordering tests for this one, prescribing medications for others, racking his brains for the cases that had him stumped. And why shouldn’t the patients stare? They were at the mercies of a man who literally held their lives in his hands. And who was she? She was just some stupid high school kid who couldn’t even follow what the doctor was saying half the time. And yet their eyes questioned her anyway. And the all asked her the same thing. Am I going to die? But she didn’t have the answers. She was just a kid, playing nurse for the night, unable to do anything more than offer sympathy.

It was the ones that slipped away that she couldn’t stand. Three times already, different patients had coded and the doctor had to run off to some part of the floor to try and save them. They were always as far away as humanly possible. And it was always a futile effort. He hadn’t managed to save even one of them so far. And Angelica was useless. She was no nurse. She wasn’t even a Candy Striper in this kind of environment. She was just a face in the crowd, bearing witness to death and being powerless to stop it. She was useless and she knew it. But what else could she do?

Cliff’s pager went off again, and she knew by now that it probably meant another code. Another life they would arrive entirely too late to save. Another soul that she would watch depart from this life while the doctor tried futilely to bring him or her back. But such was her duty this night. She took off at a run with Doctor Aiken, hot on his heels as he made his way to the ward where the next crisis awaited him. She thought about how cruel it seemed to leave him in charge under these conditions. The poor guy was just an intern. Why weren’t there enough residents and attendings on hand? And then Angelica remembered the accident, and realized where they all were. She couldn’t blame them. Too many children in intensive care. Hope was needed there more than anyone else. These were the halls of the damned.

As Angelica, and Cliff himself likely presumed, they were once again too late to make a difference. But Aiken was a good doctor. He went through the motions anyway, trying to ignite the spark of life where there was none. Angelica watched dutifully, wondering if she was her more for his own support than anything else. She kept him in line, because he couldn’t fall apart in front of her. Dr. Aiken took a deep breath as he stood over his stubbornly lifeless patient, cutting his losses on this one. She could feel him pausing, drawing air into his lungs very carefully. “I’m calling it. Time of death, twenty-one thirty-six.” He offered Angelica a very weak smile, trying to cope any way he knew how. “You get to go home in twenty-four minutes. I’ll try not to kill anyone else in that time spread.”

Unfortunately, those hopes did not hold true for either of them. One of the patients on the east wing had a sudden heart failure, a young man who appeared to be in his twenties, not much older than the doctor himself. Angelica and Cliff ran as fast as they could, but hope had already waned by the time they arrived. “Help me with this defibrillator.” Dr. Aiken pleaded.

“What if there’s a lawsuit?” Angelica asked.

“Don’t worry about that now. If there’s any trouble, you were just a volunteer following my orders. You didn’t know any better. It’s me they’ll come after. Please, I need your help!”

Angelica hesitated for only a moment, then gave in. “What do I have to do?”

“Just use the controls to set it for the charge I tell you, it’s simple. I’ll take care of the rest.”

“All right.” Beads of sweat poured down Angelica’s face as she watched the doctor go to work, steadily increasing the power output as he ordered. But despite the doctor’s best efforts, he couldn’t bring the dead back to the world of the living.

“Come on, damn you. Come on, COME ON!” He screamed at last, practically throttling his deceased patient before realizing that it wouldn’t do any good.The doctor seemed to refuse to accept another death. He stood there quietly, not doing anything for over a minute. And then, finally, Angelica saw him do something she had never seen anyone in a hospital do before. Cliff quietly called a time of death, took a deep breath, and picked the defibrillator up, throwing it as hard as he could, sending it flying across the room and smashing into the wall. With an aura of quiet anger, he departed the scene, and Angelica quietly followed, not having any idea what she was supposed to do now. The doctor took several quick turns, and Angelica struggled to keep up. Finally, she saw him enter a room at the end of an alcove, and she was able to grab the door just before it shut. A bit wary, Angelica opened it and stepped inside. The room was fairly dark, despite the overhead light. She found Dr. Aiken furiously rummaging through different bottle until he found the one he was looking for.

“Cliff?” Angelica asked, and the doctor’s eyes widened as he seemed to notice her for the first time.

“Angelica.” He said faintly, twisting the bottle open and pouring several of the pills into his hand. “Call it a perk.” He said, tossing the pills into his mouth and swallowing them without the aid of water.

“What are you doing?”

Cliff laughed bitterly. “Having a conversation with my old friend, Mr. Codeine.”

“You shouldn’t do that, Cliff.”

“Probably not. But it takes the edge off. Listen, kid. No one should’ve seen what you did tonight. So forgive me if my conscience is weighing on me. I never intended to put you through this.”

“I. . .um. . .” Angelica suddenly realized what he was talking about. All night long, she had been blocking it out as a defense mechanism. Not just the deaths. But the looks. The pleas and the accusations of the dying. The people desperately looking to her for some kind of help or salvation, clinging to the false hope that some Candy Striper still in high school could save them because it was all they had left to keep them going. And the rising body count. Never before had she seen death so intimately, watched the lives nearly drain out of people. Five of them. And she was nothing more than their witness. Someone to stand there and see them move on to the afterlife, give some kind of approval to their passing. Would anyone even remember who they were? If she and Cliff hadn’t been present, they would’ve died alone.

“Here.” Cliff said, taking her hand and placing three of the pills into it. “I’m afraid this is all I can do for you. They won’t make you forget, I’m afraid. They just. . .make it more bearable, I guess. I’m sorry, Angelica. Maybe I’m just a rotten doctor after all. Look, why don’t you get out of here. Just forget about tonight. I’m sorry.” Dr. Aiken gently pushed her out of the room, shutting the door behind her. She wasn’t certain, but she thought she could hear crying from the other side.

OooooooooO

In the lobby of the hospital, Angelica had removed her uniform, silently folding it into a square so she could carry it easily. She took a sip of water from the fountain, then winced as she heard shouts of alarm coming from a nearby hallway, and a harried looking doctor seemed to take off at top speed. Cliff’s relief, maybe. She wasn’t there, but she could already here the struggling breaths, the frustration, the inescapable death that loomed over the entire building like a specter. Never had she felt so useless, so hopeless. Without giving it another thought, Angelica popped the pills that Dr. Aiken had given her and sent them into her stomach with a few sips of water. She walked outside the lobby doors and trotted down the steps, looking around. She hadn’t called her father to come pick her up. She didn’t want to see him. She didn’t really want to see anybody. She just wanted to forget about this entire night, wake up, and become Angelica again. She heard the sounds of an approaching ambulance siren. More lambs to the slaughter. How many more would lose their lives this night?

Angelica took off at a run, not paying any mind to where she was going. She had no destination. She just wanted to run until she collapsed, until she couldn’t think or feel anything.

“What's the frequency, Kenneth?" is your Benzedrine, uh-huh
I was brain-dead, locked out, numb, not up to speed
I thought I'd pegged you an idiot's dream
Tunnel vision from the outsider's screen
I never understood the frequency, uh-huh
You wore our expectations like an armored suit, uh-huh

Everything began to coalesce into a gigantic blur for her. Visions of light among the dark night, cars speeding by blaring rap music from their overpriced stereos, people walking in and out of the familiar downtown bars. All of them seemed so insignificant for some reason, but then, she couldn’t think of anything that seemed important to her at the moment. What did any of it matter? The American Hospital was the end of the road.

I'd studied your cartoons, radio, music, TV, movies, magazines
Richard said, "Withdrawal in disgust is not the same as apathy"
A smile like the cartoon, tooth for a tooth
You said that irony was the shackles of youth
You wore a shirt of violent green, uh-huh
I never understood the frequency, uh-huh

She didn’t remember coming home, or even what time it was. She couldn’t even remember the trip. She couldn’t remember falling onto her bed, half-crushing her cat beneath her weight. She couldn’t remember falling asleep. And she barely remembered the fuzzy feeling that stayed in her brain for most of the following morning. All she remembered was pretending to go to school but instead walking to her Uncle Stu’s house, where her grandfather grudgingly allowed her to sleep on the sofa for most of the day. And she remembered acting as though it hadn’t happened. She remembered going back to school and acting like her usual self, convincing herself that everything was the same. And after a week or two, it was, except for one thing.

"What's the frequency, Kenneth?" is your Benzedrine, uh-huh
Butterfly decal, rear-view mirror, dogging the scene
You smile like the cartoon, tooth for a tooth
You said that irony was the shackles of youth
You wore a shirt of violent green, uh-huh
I never understood the frequency, uh-huh
You wore our expectations like an armored suit, uh-huh
I couldn't understand
You said that irony was the shackles of youth, uh-huh
I couldn't understand
You wore a shirt of violent green, uh-huh
I couldn't understand
I never understood, don't fk with me, uh-huh

OoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooO

“I never volunteered as a Candy Striper again.” Angelica said softly, a far-off look in her eyes slowly dissipating.

“That’s terrible.” Chuckie responded. “Angelica, I’m so sorry. I never knew.”

“You’re damn right you didn’t know! And I never want anyone else to know, either. It’s not so terrible. People dying, that’s terrible. I may not be a very compassionate person, but. . .never mind, it’s getting late. Get some rest. I’ll come back later.”

“But Angelica-”

“Just leave it alone, Chucker.” Angelica responded, then she walked out the door before he could say anything else. Chuckie was left staring after her, wondering what he could possibly say. Angelica had been right. No one could ever understand her but her.

OoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooO

“Hospitals are where they attempt to kill you without explaining why. The cold and measured cruelty of the American Hospital is not caused by doctors who are overworked or who have gotten used to, and bored with death. It is caused by doctors WHO ARE PAID TOO MUCH FOR DOING TOO LITTLE and who are admired by the ignorant, as witchmen with cure, when most of the time they don’t know their own arse-hairs from celery shreds.”

--Charles Bukowski

“Notes Of A Dirty Old Man”

OoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooO

Author’s Notes

I hope that you all enjoyed this special, double-sized edition of Gravity. I do apologize for taking so long to bring it to you, but there’s been a ton of stuff going on in my life already. Those of you who read Instant Gratification know what I’m referring to, but for those who don’t, my father has been diagnosed with a large, though mercifully benign, brain tumor. His surgery has been moved up, and he is supposed to have it removed this Wednesday, May 24. So as you can imagine, it’s been pretty crazy around here, between my job and trying to do a lot of stuff for my family. At some point, I really needed a release. I’ve been pecking away at an update for this story for like close to two months now, literally a paragraph at a time. Not the most efficient way to write, but progress was made, and now, I’m finally able to publish something new.

I know this chapter is a lot different than you were probably expecting. I took a serious turn in the second half, but I had my reasons. I really wanted to get deeper into examining Angelica’s motivations, or lack thereof, why she hasn’t yet figured out what she wants to do with her life. So I worked to give her a scarring experience. It plays a bit serious for Angelica, I guess, but I felt it was necessary. Rest assured that the hospital material is in no way influenced by my father’s condition, nor is it intended to be some kind of statement about healthcare. I just decided to use a small part of Angelica’s background and make it into something more grandiose. I strongly suggest using Van Morrison’s classic song T. B. Sheets as background music for the hospital sequence. And it certainly wouldn’t hurt to locate a copy of R.E.M.’s hit What’s The Frequency, Kenneth? Which was the insert song I used near the end of that part, all lyrics written by them.

I didn’t place any of the other characters in this chapter. I haven’t forgotten about them, I just felt it was more important to focus on the core material this time out. You can probably expect to see something with Phil pretty soon, though, I certainly couldn’t forget about him. And we’ll also be seeing the adults get involved as time marches on. I have a lot of plans for this story, I feel like I know where it’s going rather strongly, which definitely gives me a good feeling about how the story will turn out when it’s finished.

I am sorry to have kept everyone waiting on this, I really have been trying to do an awful lot lately. Things just seem to be getting crazy in my life, it feels good to update both of my stories back to back like this. It offers me some hope that I’ll somehow manage to keep going. Sometimes all we can do is our best. Thanks to everyone who’s been giving me all the hope and support. It means more to me than you’ll ever know.

That said, I know when to make an exit. But if you please, do me the honor of sending your questions, comments, compliments, complaints, love letters, death threats, marriage proposals, and ransom demands to:

Lord Malachite

5/21/06

3:33AM, EST

E-mail: ranger(underscore)writer(at)yahoo(dot)com

AIM: Asukaphile26