And here I thought I wouldn't start another fic until the OMFG one was finished.

Ah, well, I needed humor.

And this was just too good a plot bunny.

Aaaanyway, through hours of... we'll call it "research"... I have now gathered enough information to tell you the whole story of mou hitori no Yuugi's memory world thing... you know, that time when I was stuck in front of the tomb while Zork the Fugly was putting Pharoah and co. through all that destroy-Egypt shit... yeah. That thing.

It starts like this:

Chapter One: When I was young whippersnapper, I used to raid tombs

Ryou is running through the middle of the night into some church. Basically, he acts like a whiny little shit until his yami takes over, and he hears Fuglyman (Zork) going on about world domination... or destruction... whatever, from inside a pipe organ. Yeah. Really weird. Ryou screams, the church windows break, and you can disregard everything I just told you because it is completely irrelevant to the rest of the story, I don't know why anyone thinks I should know, or why the hell this even happened, and I personally do not give a fuck.

SO, many decades ago before Mutou Sugoroku looked like a pale prune with a gay gray updo, he went to the lovely land of Egypt to go raid some tombs. He claims to have been playing a game with the shadows or some shit like that, but his guides were honest with the rest of us and said they just wanted the loot.

I don't like them. They were mean, greedy, stupid, and FUUUUUG-LY.

So they go into a tomb, which everyone assumes was Atemu's... although now that I look back on it, it was probably Seto's... Doesn't matter. So they go in, and SOMEHOW Mutou knows what all the important stuff says, and where all the traps and secret entrances are, and how to get through it withoutgetting killed. WOW, THAT'S NOT WEIRD OR SUSPICIOUS AT ALL! So, while they're dodging the moving stone statue warriors (never underestimate the bizzareness of an Indiana Jones ripoff), the younger of the two Fugly Brothers freaks out like the complete moron he is, and gets impaled. That's one less fugly person in the world. So the older one is all, "No! My brother's dead!"

Okay, this must have been a pretty damn dysfunctional family, because if that was me I wouldn't have just pulled a gun on Mutou. I'd have shot the guy, cried over my brother for a while, then jumped over the cliff to see wtf was at the bottom of this thing, and maybe committed suicide while I was at it. I guess it's a good thing that wasn't me...

Anywho, Fugly pulls gun on Mutou. Mutou leads way to next chamber. Mutou is about halfway across the bridge, Fugly shoots him in the ass.

Orwas it the shoulder?

Doesn't matter.

Mutou falls over, but, like all protagonists in such a situation, manages to grab hold of the edge. Whoop-dee-fuckin-doo, he's alive. Fugly steps over him, monster jumps out of bridge, Isis cheers for said monster, Fugly is devoured, Isis dances for joy.

Then Mutou, still hanging there, is like, "Shit, I don't wanna die!" and everything turns all light and stuff and Phantom Pharaoh shows up to save Mutou's sorry arse. Mutou sees Atemu and he's like "HOLY FUUUUUUUUUUUCK!" and then Atemu's like "I've been waiting for you... Siamun."

Ooooooh. Pretty lights.

So Mutou wakes up on the bridge and he's not bleeding. Or dead. So he's like, "what the hell just happened," then he grabs his booty, a little gold box.

To hearthe fate of said box please tune in for the next chapter.

Eh, it'll get better. What do you think? Good start? Bad start? I'll update once I get reviews.