Disclaimer: I don't own these bishies, Minekura Kazuya does but I love to stare at them...and drool...

Thanks to Mikaze Azalea for beta-reading! Watashi wa aishiteru, Azalea-neechan!

"Were you the one who was calling me?"

Golden eyes looked up to stare into hard purple. "I wasn't calling anyone."

"Don't lie to me, I know it was you." The blonde knelt down in front of the stone prison. "Come on, I don't have all day."

Smaller fingers grasped the outstretched hand. It seemed so right; the way their fingers interlocked so comfortably, the way the hand that held his was warm and firm and simply there.

As the sun set on Mt. Gogyou, it shone down on two figures making their way towards the monks' temple.

xxx

He was running away.

Away from Sanzo. Away from the rejection. Away from the pain and hurt. Away from the anger he saw in the blonde's eyes. Goku wasn't afraid of being hurt in battle. He wasn't afraid of dying because if he died, he knew he would go down fighting and that was the only way to go.

But he couldn't stand the way Sanzo would shout at him. The way the monk would push him away when he tried to get close or be nice to the irate man. Because Sanzo was his universe. He was everything that Goku needed and being pushed away by Sanzo was like being denied the right to live.

The itan ran on, unmindful of the rain pounding down on him. The raindrops mingled with the tears on his face and the brunette swiped angrily at them, angry at the show of weakness.

He was just trying to be nice since Sanzo seemed to be in such a bad mood because of the rain. Goku had handed him some food to try and cheer up his keeper but the offered can of peaches was thrown across the room and rolled to stop against the wall, accompanied by shouts and insults from Sanzo.

Goku had run out at that point, brushing past Hakkai and Gojyo. He ran into the forest and now, he was standing on the banks of a river, a waterfall pouring past the giant idealized stone carving of Buddha.

Suddenly, his senses registered someone standing behind him. Whirling around, the saru came face to face with a smirking Homura. The fighting god was standing so close that Goku could reach out to touch him.

"Hello, Son Goku."

xxx

They were fighting again.

Homura loved the way their weapons clashed together. The way their breaths came in hard gasps, their chests heaving. It made him feel alive, made him feel like there was still something worth living for.

The half-god considered keeping Goku alive after creating his new world. They could have so much fun together.

Tiring of the game after a few minutes, Homura managed to wrap the chains of his shackles around Goku's arms, effectively pinning them to the sides of the younger itan's body. He leant in closer until his lips were just brushing against Goku's ear. "Stronger…" he whispered.

"What—"

"You must become stronger…"

In a swift movement, Homura punched Goku's midsection, effectively rendering him unconscious.

xxx

Goku woke up chained to a wall at his wrists and ankles. The stone behind him was cold and damp like the metal around his wrists. He turned angry gold eyes around the room and they finally landed on Homura lounging against a stone pillar a few feet away.

The older itan walked towards him when he saw Goku moving. The smaller brunette glared at the fighting god as Homura approached. When he was close enough, Homura raised his hand and offered the saru a nikuman.

Goku glared at the food before turning his head away. He felt Homura's breath on his neck as the half-god moved marginally closer. Goku suppressed the shivers that went down his spine at the sound of Homura's voice.

"What's wrong Goku?" the god asked as he ran fingers down along the younger itan's arm. The hand stopped at Goku's shoulder as the other one made its way towards his hip. "Why are you so tense?"

Choosing to ignore him, Goku closed his eyes and willed himself to calm down. He tried to ignore the words that were being whispered softly into his ear, the hands that rested so surely on his body.

"Don't think I haven't noticed when you look at me, Son Goku. I know that you think of me as a dark-haired version of your beloved Sanzo." Goku screwed his eyes shut tighter. There was a pause before the half-god continued. "It could be so good, Son Goku."

Against his better judgment, the smaller brunette opened his eye a small crack. He heard something in Homura's voice. It was…sad? Disappointed? Pitying? Goku decided that it didn't matter. Hearing the god feel sorry for him made the saru feel angry and disappointed. He didn't need the pity. It made him feel weak.

xxx

At the first sign of a golden eye, Homura looked up and moved his left hand, running his fingers down the side of Goku's face, down the saru's neck and letting them move up again to cup one side of Goku's face. He turned it so that their eyes met.

In a way, Goku reminded Homura of Rinrei. The way their eyes were so wide and innocent-looking. The way they always smiled though there was no reason for them to do so. The way they always seemed to be happy even though the world seemed to slowly shrink and suffocate them…

It was almost like an insult, come to think of it…It was taunting him, driving him crazy. Goku was a reminder of Rinrei, it was like having her ghost looking out of a different body. Rinrei was there, just in a different form.

Sometimes, Homura felt like killing Goku. Really killing Goku. The younger itan was so brash and stupid and selfish and spoiled sometimes. Homura hated it when Goku acted that way because it seemed like a personal insult to his sweet Rinrei. And there were times that he wanted to pull Goku close and ravish him the way he never got to do with his beloved. Goku was his second chance, an opportunity to do what he never got to do with her. Goku was his.

Homura dropped his hand back to its original position on Goku's hip and pressed his body flush against the smaller brunette's. Goku gasped and tried to move away but Homura just leaned his head on Goku's shoulder, turning it a little so that he could whisper into Goku's ear.

"Don't try to deny what you're feeling, Goku. Give in to me…" He darted out the tip of his tongue to trace the shell of an ear. "It could be so good…"

xxx

It was impossible for Goku to miss the sexual innuendo in the comment. The way Homura said it was so different from what he said the first time. Despite his looks, Goku wasn't as stupid as he seemed. He knew that what he wanted with Sanzo was being offered to him by Homura; the affection, love, acceptance, understanding all there for the taking.

Another part of him screamed in his mind. This was not Sanzo no matter how much Homura resembled him. It wasn't the same no matter what Goku did because it meant that Sanzo, his Sanzo, could be replaced that easily and that would degrade the blonde because he was supposed to be irreplaceable.

Even though these thoughts ran through his head, Goku didn't make any move of protest when Homura began to slowly unzip his pants. The smaller brunette shivered in the cold air as his final article of clothing fell to the stone floor.

He was being violated, his mind screamed at him. Stop Homura! His inner voice shouted. Whatever you do, it's not Sanzo. It will never be Sanzo. Because Sanzo does. Not. Care.

Tears began to crawl their way down the saru's cheeks. Homura stopped preparing Goku's ass with the lube he had fetched. "I'm sorry if I hurt you, Son Goku," he whispered into an ear. "But it will get much better soon."

Homura slid into Goku without warning, burying himself hilt-deep into the younger itan. Goku grit his teeth against the pain. Whatever happens, he would not cry out because that would mean that he was defeated.

The god began to pump.

xxx

Homura paused in his thrusting for a while. Goku had quieted and the older itan was curious why the sounds of mixed pain and pleasure had stopped. He fixed his two-colored gaze on the younger brunette, panting heavily from exertion.

Goku was crying quietly, staring at a pillar somewhere behind Homura.

"What's wrong?" Homura asked softly. "Did I hurt you?"

It took a while before Goku answered the query fired at him. "San…zo…"

A dart of anger shot through Homura's system. Here he was, giving Goku all that he was craving; the love he wanted from Sanzo, and all the damn monkey could think about was Sanzo.

What was so special about the blonde anyway? Sanzo never even bothered to at least try and pretend that he cared for Goku. Sanzo was always pushing Goku; pushing him away and pushing him harder for his own selfish need to reclaim the sutra. Sanzo didn't understand anything. He didn't understand the pain of being different, of being confused about your real personality. He wasn't an outcast.

He wasn't a heretic.

In anger and frustration, he slapped Goku across the face. When he resumed pumping, he did it without his earlier gentleness. He pounded into the younger itan brutally, causing the younger brunette to shriek in pain.

"Why do you keep on thinking of Sanzo?" he asked angrily, words coming out in short bursts in-between thrusts. "What about me? I can give you what he never could; what he never offered."

Goku didn't answer, instead, he opted to continue crying.

After a few more violent thrusts, Homura came, spilling his seed violently into Goku's body.

Homura leant heavily on Goku's smaller frame, trying to catch his breath.

After a few more minutes, he undid the shackles holding up the smaller itan and laid him gently on the floor. He felt sorry for losing his control the way he did but the saru was asking for it.

"It's all your fault, Son Goku."

xxx

When Goku woke up, he was completely dressed and lying on a bed. Homura didn't speak to him; he was standing a few feet away and leaning on a pillar, his mismatched gaze focused on Goku.

In silence, he motioned for Goku to stand up. The saru followed, wincing slightly because of the pain shooting up his backside. He resolutely fixed his features into a stony mask and followed the fighting god.

They walked. Out of the building and into the forests. They walked in silence until they reached the place by the waterfall where Goku had been kidnapped. Homura nodded upwards, motioning for Goku to climb up a tree.

As the saru waited, thoughts spun through his head. Confusion, guilt, pain. He felt disloyal to Sanzo. He had sworn to follow the blonde to the ends of Togenkyou if necessary but now, he had just allowed Homura to violate him. Granted, he had been tied up but that usually didn't stop him from doing bodily harm if he wanted to.

After a few more minutes of self-destructive thought, he saw a glint of gold through the dark forest.

Sanzo.

He looked up and watched as Sanzo confronted Homura.

"Where is he?" Sanzo growled.

Goku listened carefully. Was that worry he heard? No…It was probably just frustration and annoyance at being so inconvenienced by the abduction. Sanzo could never love him.

But he was strong so he wouldn't show that he had been hurt by Sanzo's rejection. He was strong; he would survive. He had lived five hundred years alone and he could live without Sanzo's affections.

When Homura revealed where Goku had been hiding, the blonde looked up at him with his ever-present anger evident on his face. As Goku climbed down, he slowly recoiled into the shell of his soul. He should have known better than to hope that Sanzo could return his feelings.

He stood before the blonde, head bowed, and waited for the blow to land. Instead, a hand placed itself on top of his head.

"What did you tell him?" Sanzo asked Homura, voice even and cold.

"What he needed to hear," Homura replied.

Sanzo immediately turned around and began to walk. Goku followed without a word but he glanced over his shoulder at Homura.

He felt like he was leaving a piece of himself behind.