Thank you, everybody who reviewed, everyone who asked me to update, hell, even people who read this and thought 'this ain't worth my time.' If you ask me for updates, it does actually make me write faster. I used Google translator (God bless ya, Google) for the Spanish parts.

Points to anyone who can pick out the Shaun of the Dead parts. :P. Still don't own that, by the way.

Leon awoke to the sound of someone speaking softly in Spanish. His head hurt like hell and throbbed as he looked up from his slouched sitting position. The first thing he noticed was the wall in front of him had a large bloodstain smeared down it. Lurching back in panic, he bumped into something behind him. Or rather, someone. Slowly, he turned his head. A cheek pressed against a cheek and the side of a mouth caught his. Both of them quickly turned away in embarrassment.

Leon caught a flash of white teeth and dark, staring eyes. His hands were cuffed behind him, touching the skin of the other man.

"Hey." He nudged the man to get his attention, gaze slipping to the unfamiliar handgun that was holstered and uncomfortably digging into his back. Leon narrowed his eyes. Was this man using the gun to kill intruders like the rest of the villagers, or was he, like Leon, trying to fight his way out of this mess? The man grunted as Leon jabbed him with an elbow.

"Mi Dios. Out of one hole and into another damn hole." The Spaniard sounded exasperated, and Leon could hardly blame him. "So...just what the hell is happening here?" he asked, trying not to sound too rude. The dark haired man chuckled and turned his head. "Americano? What brings you here of all places?" These words reminded Leon of his mission. He dug in his pocket for the picture of Ashley, unintentionally twisting the cuffs around the stranger's hands. The man winced. "Hey, take it easy Le- whoever you are."

Leon brought the photo round, showing it to the other man. "I came here to find this girl, and my name is Leon." The stranger studied the picture for a moment. "Heh, Americano, you don't look like a cop; too pretty to be dealing with bad guys." Leon tuned back around, offended. "Maybe."

There was a moment of silence, the Spanish man skimming his eyes over the photo. He gave a light laugh that snapped Leon out of his musing. "At a guess, I'd say she's...the president's daughter?" The agent twisted his head to look at the man. "That's way too good for a guess. Wanna start telling me what you know?" The Spaniard just stared straight ahead, and spoke in a whisper. "Psychic powers."

Leon tried to look skeptical, but after all he'd seen, he wasn't going to take a chance. The man looked round and snorted. "Do you really believe that, cop? I heard some of the Ganado talking about her being locked in the church."

"Ganado?"

"Cattle."

"Wait, the...cows told you about this?" The man chuckled again, face lit up with amusement. "No bonito, the villagers are called cattle because...well, let's just say that they haven't been themselves lately, which is a shame, these were good people." Leon turned his head to see the Spaniards face twisted into grief, but a moment later he shook himself and resumed staring at the wall.

"And who might you be?"

"Me llamo Luis Sera. I- ah- used to work in Madrid. As a cop. Kinda like you. But now I'm just...a good for nothing researcher stuck in this hellhole and in desperate need of a smoke."

A former cop like himself? This spiked Leon's interest, and he decided to press the man for more information. "So, why did you quit the force?" The man scoffed. "Policia. You spend all day saving other people's asses and getting shot at, and people still act like you're the enemy." Leon could relate to that. "I used to be a cop...for the grand total of one day." The Spaniard looked to the side. "Jesus. I thought I was bad, amigo."

Leon was absorbed in his memories, eyes glazing over. "Somehow I managed to get myself involved with the incident in Raccoon city. On my first day in the force. But I think being late saved my ass."

"Late? Way to make a good first impression."

Annoyed, Leon twisted the cuffs again. "Ah! Hey, ok ok! I'm sorry. Why were you late?"

Leon sighed, blowing his fringe away from his face. "I take rejection hard, it seems. Hit the bottle when my girlfriend chucked me, the day before I was due to begin duty."

Raccoon city...

Luis remembered back six years, the news filled with stories about the flesh-eating dead and strange, twisted creatures in that ill-fated city.

And this cop survived all that? Luis was amazed.

"That is...the incident with the viral outbreak, right?" he frowned, watching the cop's distracted nod.

Poor guy...

"Right, well, we need a way to get out of-"

"Te voy a matar." The new voice was quiet and droning, but the sinister scrape of metal against the floor sounded loud to both the captives. A Ganado appeared in the doorway, dragging a huge axe behind it, face and shirt splattered with fresh blood. Luis began struggling against the cuffs that bound them together, watching in fear as the bloody man moved closer. "Do something cop!" He yelled.

"Ladies first!" Leon snapped back, thinking rapidly. The Ganado growled and swung the axe over its shoulder, a split-second after Leon turned his head and whispered: "Now!" The axe came down and Leon pulled the cuffs, dragging them into the way. The links were severed, a painful jolt running through the metal and cutting into Luis and Leon's hands. Now free, the blonde cop lay on his back, waiting for the right time to strike. The Ganado raised the axe again with an annoyed yell. Leon lifted his foot, and caught it under the disgusting creature's sizeable stomach, lifting, and heaved it into the wall. It fell, neck snapping against the floor with a final, sick sound.

Leon got to his feet, easing his pained hands out of the broken cuffs, watching as Luis did the same. Blood trickled from a gash on his wrist, but when he examined it, it wasn't that bad. Luis walked over to where the cop stood, a worried look on his face when he spotted the blood. The Spaniard seemed lucky, only a purple line indicating where the cuffs had been.

"Are you alright?" he sounded pretty concerned, fumbling in his pockets for something. "Here, use this." Luis took out a green herb and grabbed Leon's hand, pressing the plant against the wound. Leon almost pulled away, before he realised that the contact was probably only intended as a strictly concerned act of safety on his behalf. He allowed Luis to fuss over him for a few more minutes, before inconspicuously moving away to grab the ammo he had just spotted on one of the shelves. He was surprised to find his guns still on him, but miffed about his missing jacket. Luis was tending to his own gun, one that Leon had never used before, and didn't look up when he said: "Ok, let's go."

Leon narrowed his eyes. "Will you take me to the church?" he asked, hoping that this guy wouldn't leave him in the lurch when it really mattered. Luis sighed. "Haven't you considered getting out of here while you still can?" Leon growled and pushed past him. "If you won't help me, then fine. But I have a job to do, and a girl to save." He began to walk around the corner of the building, gun raised should anymore axe-wielding maniacs appear, and was not surprised to hear Luis following behind.

As they passed the window, Leon's eyes trained on the door in front of them, a purple-garbed figure with a scarf over half of his face suddenly appeared, orange tinted eyes studying them. Startled, Leon jumped, pulling the trigger at the same time. The bullet lodged in the wood of the edge of the window, not an inch from the stranger who ducked, and let out a muffled "don't shoot!"

Leon leaned out of the window, looking down at the hunched man. "Sorry." The man stood slowly as Leon put his gun away, and turned. "Uh...over 'ere, stranger." The man looked very shaken as he trundled around the back of the shack. Leon kept watching until Luis nudged him in the back. "Well? Come on! I know him, he's cool."

Behind the shack, they found the man standing a little more confidently.

"Luis!" came a throaty greeting from him. Luis grinned and walked up to him. "Hola, Merchant. How are you doing?" The 'merchant' shrugged, and Leon could hear various jangling and clunking noises from beneath his long, closed coat. "Eh. Survivin'." He opened his coat, revealing various weapons of all different sizes. Leon raised his eyebrows, but said nothing about the man's armament.

After purchasing a rifle and scope and tuning up his shotgun so that it now held eight shells, Leon was peering through gaps in a wall. Outside their little enclosed safety, he could see a gorge, a hole in the earth so deep that the bottom was covered with some kind of mist. Planks made up walkways and bridges, and there were a couple more of dilapidated buildings. Ganado patrolled the place, looking bored as they shuffled along with their weapons idly held in their clammy hands. Up a hill to his right, Leon could also see some activity, and a good number of the bumbling creatures holding sticks of unlit dynamite. Luis was standing next to the large gate that separated them from the Ganado. Looking at Leon, he whispered 'how many?'. Leon responded by shaking his head and ducking under the gap least any spotted him. He crawled towards Luis, hiding behind the same jut in the wall where the Spaniard was. He began to speak, but Luis clamped a hand over his mouth and pressed Leon's head close to his. "Don't move," the Spaniard breathed, so quiet that Leon could hardly hear it, even with the man's lips almost touching his ear. "There's one right outside."

Leon listened intently, the heavy breathing of a Ganado rasping from the other side of the gate. The creature muttered to itself.

"Bastardos. Derramaré sangre." Something metallic scraped against the gate, possibly an axe or pitchfork. Leon crouched on the floor, wondering why Luis still had his head near his. He would have pushed the man onto his ass had he not been worried that the Ganado outside might hear them. After a few moments, heavy footsteps could be heard walking back along the path and both men simultaneously let out a shaky breath of relief.

"Right. There was about ten that I could see. Probably more in the buildings and on that hill." Leon watched as Luis smiled. "So, what's the plan?" Leon thought for a moment.

"If you...lure them into here, I can shoot them when they come through the gate. From what I've seen, they can't use handles, they just...pat the door until it opens. So you should be able to run in here, shut it on them, and then when they open it, blast them." Luis huffed at the idea of being bait, but reluctantly agreed with a nod.

"Ready?"

"If you can ever be ready for something like this."

"Remember: Only shoot them if you have to. Conserve ammo."

"I'm on it."

Luis pushed the heavy gate open as Leon stood with his back against the door of the shack. The first Ganado he saw was the one they had heard. It was thankfully with its back to him, a pitchfork clasped in both hands. As stealthily as he could, Luis crept up behind it, Red 9 at the ready. The former-human called to some of the others on the hill that overlooked the area, waving one arm to grab their attention. The ones that came to the edge saw their companion waving, the bothersome researcher aiming his gun behind it. There was a momentary surprised silence, before one had the presence of mind to yell out a warning.

"¡Detrás de ti, estúpido!"

The Ganado turned in time to meet with one of Luis' bullets, the lead hitting the stunned creature in the chest. All the ones on the cliff were yelling now, alerting the others to the intruder. Most began to run down the slope, brandishing weapons and growling. Luis backed away from the enraged Ganado and hurriedly opened the gate, slamming it shut when he had slipped through. He stood beside Leon, taking the same stance the other man had, and aiming at the trembling gate.

"They definitely want to come in..."