: coughs : Well, this is my first Fanfiction for Tennis no Ohjisama. However, this is not my first Fanfiction. So, please excuse any errors…I’m not really following ay time line…if you read any of my fics, you should see that I don’t.

Disclaimer: I do not own Tennis no Ohjisama, would be nice if I did…evil things would happen to our lovely Tennis boys.

Pairings: Hints of OishixEiji…nothing else for now.

Warnings: This Fanfiction covers topics such as; eating disorders and self-abuse. So, if you’re uncomfortable reading anything under these subjects please turn away now. Same goes for any people who suffer from these disorders and are easily triggered!

Other warnings: My Japanese is bad! I lived there from birth to the age for 4 and I spoke it fluently! But now, living in Texas in the US and not being around the language or speaking it after 14 years it’s horrible. So, please excuse any errors!

Flames are welcomed here……………

Tasukete: Prologue

The room was silent and dark, the only light coming from the small TV that occupied the wooden desk against the far wall of the room. A small figure, naked except for the dark boxers he wore, crouching in the corner of his room. Knees tightly drawn to his chest, his small bony arms laying limply beside him. His once lively eyes were now dark and vacant as he stared off into the distance- at nothing.

Not far from him laid one of his most precious possessions; a tennis racket- one that once was only slightly damaged form it’s use, a tennis racket- metallic gray in color - that had seen many wins and loses…too many loses in its owners opinion. Though, the racket was just an object it’s owner took care of it as if it was more than that…

…until just a few hours ago. Its owner broke it in half, is once white stings netted tightly together were now cut and it’s gray frame covered in its owners blood…

The boy continued to stare at nothing. Slowly he moved one hand bringing it to his legs, once muscular and lean were now long and thin, covered with scars, blood and open wounds, his fingers absently traced over one area of his thigh, over scarring flesh…flesh that had words carved into it such as: Looser, weak, fat, dumb, etc etc…

Silence.

Hours passed by…or was it just a few minutes? Not like the boy cared. He didn’t care if it had been days, to him…life no longer mattered. His life no longer mattered.

His ears twitched slightly as he heard voices and laughter coming from downstairs.

“Tadima Eiji-chan!”

He didn’t move, he had no energy or will left to move.

“Eeeeeji! We brought you your favorite!” He recognized his eldest brothers voice, “Oi, Chibi! Doko ni iru no?” his brother was standing on the other side of his bedroom door now. “You in here?” He tried the knob and the door swung open.

“Why is it so dark in here?” He muttered to himself as he searched for the light switch, taking a quick drink from the water bottle in his hand “Here we go!“ He announced as he found the light switch. “Ototo-chan?”

Click

Shards of glass, splinters of wood, stuffing from various now mutilated stuffed animals and blood decorated the room.

“Oh…Kami-sama! Eiji!” He exclaimed with a sharp gasp as the water bottle feel from his hand and onto the floor, spilling over the wooden floor.

He rushed over to his little brothers side, gathering the small figure into his arms. “Eiji.” He muttered looking down at the figure in his arms. The once full and happy face, was not pale with sunken cheeks “Kami-sama…” he hurried him down stairs calling out to his family, “Otousan! Okaasan! Minna, Tasukete!”

This can’t be happening, he thought, running outside his brother still in his arms; his mother beside him in near hysterics, his father already at the van, his other brother and sisters rushing behind. Doshte, Eiji? I thought everything was fine…everything was getting better? Eiji…

Four Months Ago---

“Nyaa…Oishi! It’s Saturday night and you’re worrying about homework?” Eiji whined, falling onto his bed, phone against his ear. “C’mon, Fuji invited us! Lets gooooo!”

“Eiji, I really should get this done Tsuzuki -senpai--”

“Oooh! I get it.”

“Nani? Get what?”

Eiji giggled rolling onto his stomach, looking at his nails a smug look on his face, “You’re scared.”

“Nani! Iie, Eiji…it’s just ano…it’s…”

“Haha! I’ll be there to hold Oishi, so Oishi won’t have to scared, okay? The movie isn’t suppose to be scary, nya- it just messes with your head.”

“Oh yes, that makes me feel better.” Oishi replied, his voice dripping with sarcasm. After receiving some whimpering, he sighed giving in. “Okay, okay fine. I’ll go.”

“Yatta!” Eiji turned back onto his back, “I’m glad. You know Kaidoh will be pissing in his pants, but they somehow convinced him to come.”

“Eiji, that’s not very nice…”

“Gomen, gomen. Nya, I’m just surprised they got him to agree to come.” Eiji stood from his bed and went over to the full length mirror that stood alone in the corner of his bed room.

“Me too…what time is the movie?”

“Etto…I think Fuji said 8 o’clock.” Eiji stared at his reflection his face emotionless, holding the phone against his shoulder blade to free both hands, he brought one hand up to lift his shirt and the other ran against the lightly tan skin of his stomach. “Oi…Oishi?”

“Hm?”

“I’ve been wondering,” He pinched the skin underneath his bellybutton, making a disgusted face as he did so. “Remember our match against St Rudolph…”

“Hm…I do.”

“I was…just wondering- ah, never mind it’s not important.” Eiji continued to stare at his reflection, his eyebrows knitted together with disgust as he continued to pinch the flesh on his belly making the tan skin because a bright red from the abuse. “Anyway, you want me to meet you there? It’s almost 7:30 now so if you’d want to meet me at my house, or me at yours-”

“Iie.” Oishi interrupted, the start of a possible minute rant.

“Nani?”

“Sore wa chigaimasu, it wasn’t your fault. Why do you think it was? You keep asking me about all the past matches we lost. I…don’t like it when you’re insecure like that, when you have no reason.” Oishi sighed on the phone, his voice was low filled with his usual honesty.

“Gomen, Oishi. I can’t help it…” Eiji turned away from his reflection. “I won’t bring it up anymore, okay?” After receiving a grunt in reply he continue, “So, want to just meet at the Cinema House?”

“I think that would work out best.”

“Yay! Well, I better get dressed! I’ll see you in a little while. Ja ne Syu-chan! Chuuuu!”

Eiji could honestly hear his doubles partner blush over the phone.

“J-ja ne, Eiji.”

Eiji let out a long sigh as he dropped the phone into the pocket of his black cargo pants. Oishi, I wish I could believe you. I looked up again, into the full length mirror, running his hands through his burgundy hair. I really wish I could. He tugged at his white shirt, stepping closer to the mirror.

“When did this start?” He asked himself, touching the cool glass, My obsession with how I look? The doubting? He let out another sigh, again running his hands through his hair.

I’m not…good enough. I’m not strong enough. I’m not flexible enough. I’m not fast enough. I’m not thin enough. Maybe I’ve always thought these things? He bit his lip, pulling his shirt up again, he ran his fingers over his stomach.

“This is no good, Eiji. No good.” Pulling his shirt down, he pressed his forehead against the glass of the mirror, still looking into his own eyes. “I…hate you.”

He pushed away from the glass and scooped up his discarded jacket from the floor as he left his room leaving the mirror, he hated so much but couldn’t stay away from, behind.

TBC….

: coughs again : Well, let me know what you thought! Good or bad…all opinions, comments and reviews are welcomed!

Um, right now it’s 1:26 in the morning. Not late for some people but late for me! I’m normally in bed by 10...but tomorrow is my day off so I really wanted to get this written and posted. But later, I will take it down a revise it!

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Sore wa chigaimasu- That’s not true.

Chuu- kiss, I believe most the time is used at a sound.

Tadima- We’re home.