First, I would like to warn you all that the main character of this story is Nachiru, a 100 percent made-up character who has nothing to do with the real story. Is this what people call Mary Sue Fanfics? Not so sure... Anyway, if you do not like these kinds of fanfics, please refrain from reading it. I am not accepting any complaints for that part.

Of course, complaints about my writing style, grammar, etc. are appreciated. Any reviews, please?

Disclaimer: I do not own HUNTER X HUNTER, or any of its characters. I own Nachiru, however.

The first chapter is Killua's POV, but it is only this chapter. The rest will be from a third-person perspective.

And I just noticed how the first movement of the piece “Piano Sonata No. 14 in C# minor Op. 27-2” aka Moonlight Sonata by Beethoven fits this story perfectly… Also try “Broken” by Seether feat. Amy Lee (Evanescence).

Anyway, please enjoy!

I used to have an older sister. Why do I use the phrase used to? No, she is not dead. She just ran away from home a few years back.

Nachiru Zaoldyeck. Five years older than me.

She had silver hair, just like my father and I. For all I know, she was also a good assassin. I think that at one point, she was earning as much as my father, which was more than what the rest of the children brought in combined. Of course, Illumi was better at killing, but he was too self-centered. Sometimes he just left a commission because ‘he was bored’. Nachiru was very reliable, in that sense, since she had a 100 percent success rate. Another reason why so much people preferred her to the rest of the children was because of her looks. Yes, she was very pretty. Which made all the male clients go for her instead of Illumi or I.

But no matter how successful she was at her career, there was one reason why she was not entitled to be the successor of the family.

Nachiru was the daughter of my father and some other woman. So basically, she was only half-related to me.

One thing that made that obvious was the color of her eyes. Her eyes were sky blue, unlike any other member of the family. They were like marbles, and I still remember how pretty they seemed. But they were also pretty strange, since they turned red whenever she was mad or sad.

I really liked my sister. She was different from my parents or brothers. She treated me as ‘Killua’, just another normal kid. Not as the talented inheritor of the Zaoldyeck fortune, but just as another normal child. She was the only person who I could be myself with, and the mere presence of her used to calm me.

Nachiru never really got used to killing. As I said earlier, she was the best at killing among us children, probably next to Illumi. But she never accepted killing as part of daily life.
“Killua.”
I can still clearly remember her voice.
“Killua, do you fee anything when you kill someone?”
I think this was the question she asked me when I did my tenth commission. I remember that the edge of her irises kept flashing a reddish color. It was the first time I ever saw her sad, and that kept me from giving her red eyes any particular attention.
“I’m…getting used to it. Why, do you?”
“I’m no good. No matter how many times I kill, I can never really get over it.”
“Why? Father and Illumi say that you are a good assassin.”
“Still. I always hesitate. Even if it is less thana split second, I still hesitate.”
“Really?”
“…I can’t really be a part of the Zaoldyecks.”
Her expression at that time still haunts me.

After that, she tried not to show any fear or sorrow in front of me. She always took care of me, and played with me when I was bored. She wasn’t exactly nice all the time, and she nagged me at times, but now I understand that she literally ‘raised me’. She was the person who taught me the usual things that people learn from their parents. My usually nice, cool, caring older sister. When was it that I found out she was not my mother’s daughter?

Yes. That day…that day when I saw her red eyes properly for the first time. That day when I saw something I should not have seen.

“No… What are you…”
It was one of those nights when you just couldn’t sleep no matter what you tried. I went to my sister’s room, since that was what I did when I had trouble sleeping. But when I came to the door, I heard my sister’s desperate voice from a small opening of the door, and I sensed that something was terribly wrong.

“Shut up for a while, Nachiru.”
I couldn’t believe my ears when I heard that voice. It was Illumi…no mistaking about it. I peeked into the room through that small opening, and I froze on the spot.
“Why, Illumi? Let me go!”
“No way. Haven’t you noticed that I was waiting for this moment for as long as I can remember?”
Illumi had Nachiru pinned down on the floor. She was looking at his face, vivid red eyes opened wide in disbelief and fear.
“I’m your sister! I’m not…”
“I said shut up. We’re only half-related anyway. Plus, it’s biologically acceptable if we don’t have kids.”
“That’s not the point…”
My brother quickly sealed her lips. My sister opened her eyes wider, and teardrop slid down her face. She obviously did not ask for this situation, but she no longer seemed to be able to fight back. It was an impossible order, to try to run when she couldn’t even blink for fear. I was also paralyzed with fear, even if I was only watching.

Suddenly, Illumi let go of her and glared at the door… At me. He threw one of his needles at the door.
“You’re there, aren’t you, Kill?”
“Killua!”
The door opened slowly. Illumi and Nachiru saw me, and I saw them…and the whole room. It was a mess. It seemed as if my sister had put up quite a fight, but then she could not win against Illumi. Now that I think of it, he already had that ability to make people feel sick just by reaching out towards them.
“Illumi…Nachiru……?”
“If you don’t want to die, get out of here right now. Oh, and don’t tell anyone about this, okay?”
I just stood there, frozen to the spot.
“Kill, are you listening?”
“…Nachiru!”
I didn’t know what to do, so I desperately shouted to my sister. She looked at me, eyes filled with fear, and quickly looked away.
“Go, Killua. He’ll really kill you…”
Her voice seemed to wake me from a trance. I turned my back to the door, and started running as fast as I could. I wanted to protect my sister, and beat up my brother for that…but I was too weak. I was too scared.

I went back to my room, and threw up until I was spitting blood. But I still felt sick. I was only seven, so I did not fully understand what was going on in my sister’s room. But I understood enough to know that it was something bad, something very wrong… She only should have been twelve at the most. It was just sick.

For a while, my brain was blank. I was scared, I felt sick, I was so frustrated at myself… I cried, wrapping myself with my bed sheets. Usually, my sister was there to comfort me at times like that, but then she was…

Eventually, my brain regained the ability to think. That was the first time I noticed two unusual things. First, my sister’s red eyes. It wasn’t just any kind of red. It was scarlet. Of course, I was too young at that time to know of such a color as ‘scarlet’, so I just thought of it as the color of blood. Either way, she was supposed to have blue eyes, which was unusual in itself because the Zoaldyecks have purple eyes. Then why were my sister’s eyes the color of blood?

The other thing was something that Illumi said.
We’re only half-related anyway.
I couldn’t understand it. Half, meaning one parent is different. Since she had silver hair which obviously came from my father, so if she was only half-related, she would have a different mother. Was that the reason why mother always acted different towards her?

I felt sick of myself after I though of those things. How could I be so clear-headed when my sister was enduring such a terrible fate? How could I be so cold-hearted? Tears began to crawl into my eyes again. I could get through any torture from my parents of Milluki without even shouting, but this thing just kept me crying.

A few hours passed, and I noticed someone at the door of my room. I sat up and got ready for any attack that was coming, but then I noticed it was my sister.
“Nachiru!”
“Killua! Are you okay? Did Illumi do anything to you?”
“No…but what did he do to you…?”
“Don’t mind about me. You don’t have to know.”
She said that in a trembling voice, and hugged me. She was trembling so much that it took me a while to notice she was crying. She never did anything that made me uneasy, so I was shocked. Was that how much she was hurt? Was that how cruel Illumi was to her?
“Nachiru…”
I hugged her back, and started crying with her.

The next morning, she came down to breakfast like any normal morning. I gave her a worried look, but she winked at me as if to say she was alright. I was still small and stupid, so I was convinced by that. I never really noticed that Illumi was not there yet.

“Good morning.”
“Illumi, you woke up late today. Did anything happen?”
“I was just up late yesterday.”
“Don’t push yourself too hard.”
“I know.”
The moment Illumi’s voice reached her ears, she shuddered. She acted a little weird after that. Every time Illumi spoke, every time someone called his name, her eyes turned red. It was only for a split second, but it was enough for me to notice.

“Nachiru.”
Illumi suddenly spoke to her. She looked down, eyes wide with fear and hate. Wide and red, with fear and hate.
“Don’t even talk to her!”
“I wasn’t talking to you, Killua. Nachiru, can you pass me the salt?”
Illumi ignored me, and reached his hand towards Nachiru. She passed the salt without saying anything or looking up. Her arms were shaking. Then she stood up and left the room.

Nachiru started to act unusually whenever Illumi was around. Whenever they passed by each other, whenever they met, whenever she heard his voice. My sister’s eyes always turned red, and she always started shaking. Since that day, I also encountered them in a similar situation countless times. Every time, Illumi told…no, ordered me to tell no one about this. I was terrified, so I followed his orders. I knew that I would be killed if I ever failed to follow him. And there was also a great possibility that he would kill Nachiru, too.

Three years later, my sister disappeared from home. One morning, when we woke up, she was gone. She had gone without saying a word to anyone. Not even to me. I felt as if I was betrayed. I though she trusted me. At least more than the rest of the family. But she never told me about this before. She left everything except for some money and a few of her valuables. I could tell my father was mad, and that Illumi was extremely upset. I think he tried to look for Nachiru while he was out of the house, but as far as I know, he had no idea where she went.

Some time passed, and it seemed as if everyone forgot about her. No one spoke of her, and no one brought up any topic related in any way to her. It almost drove me crazy, and I was scared that I was just imagining the memories I had with her. But then, I knew that I wasn’t imagining anything. She, Nachiru Zaoldyeck, was someone who really existed. She was my sister.

“I’m getting out of here! I’m sick and tired of you telling me what to do!”

That’s why, I’m also running away from home. I’m already tired of being here, surrounded by all these people who decided to erase the existence called Nachiru. I was tired of having them order me around, to kill people, to inherit the family fortune. I wanted to decide my future for myself.

And I also wanted to see my sister again. That’s why I am running away today. I want to see her again, and ask her why she never told me anything.