Pairings: Eventual Ryuichi/Tatsuha, with other couples included

Warnings: As stated above, this fic will have yaoi in it and if you do not like the idea of two totally hot guys being in love, then this is not the fic for you. Also may contain some swearing and some mentions of dark themes. I do not know the exact way a person goes about to become a model so you'll have to forgive me for not being totally correct.

Disclaimer: I don't Gravitation. Gravitation owns me.

Summary: Tatsuha is tired of being a nobody. He wants to do something that will make Ryuichi Sakuma notice him. Something that will make the famous singer finally know his name. Tatsuha's determined. He wants to become a model. Yaoi.

Author Notes: Don't ask where this idea came from. I'm still trying to figure that out for myself. But, no matter, I still like this odd little fic.

-x-x-x-x-

-x-x-x-x-

Chapter One

-x-x-x-x-

They had laughed when he had told him. His family had fixed him with disbelieving stares before chuckling at Tatsuha's statement.

Tatsuha knew that they all had thought he was joking, that they had thought it was all just a sudden teenage whim. That it would be done and over within a few days time.

But Tatsuha was serious.

He wanted to go into modeling. And he was going to do it.

He would show them.

And maybe then, finally, Ryuichi Sakuma would know exactly who Tatsuha Uesugi was.

Tatsuha grinned at the thought.

-x- Four Years Later -x-

Tatsuha was watching the scenery outside of the window, ignoring what his agent was telling him. The 20-year-old knew that he should probably listen to Rick Sharpe, but he couldn't make himself put forth the effort. It had been four years since he had moved away from Japan and started his career in modeling. He wondered if anyone back home missed him. He wondered if anyone had even tried to find him. Maybe they had been glad to get rid of the obsessed teenager that he had once been.

Tatsuha smiled sadly. He was pathetic. If he was being truthful, he was still obsessed with Ryuichi Sakuma, he was just a lot better at hiding it. But whenever a new Ryuichi Sakuma merchandise, or new CD came out, he was secretly ecstatic. But instead of having to wait in immensely long lines only to have them be sold out, Tatsuha sent his secretary out to get them. Or he could get them himself except now he no longer needed his sister's connections. He had his own.

"Tatsuha, are you listening to me?" Rick Sharpe's voice cut through Tatsuha's nostaligic thoughts, causing him to look up at the older man.

He smiled sheepishly. "Sorry Sharpe-san." Tatsuha winced. Even after four years of living in America, he still slipped and used honorifics. He wondered if maybe that was a sign that he should be back in Japan. "I mean Mr. Sharpe. I didn't mean to tune you out. Please, continue."

Rick Sharpe shook his head, a slight smile gracing his face. The graying-brown haired man was the sole reason of why Tatsuha had made it as far as he did. If it hadn't been for Rick Sharpe, Tatsuha didn't want to know what would have happened to him.

"I have told you a million times to call me Rick. We have been working together for four years now, I think we know each other well enough to use our first names." The man paused. "Besides, it would be odd to call my most successful model by his last name."

Tatsuha smiled at the man who he had slowly begun to look upon as an second father. "It's not my fault you American's love the, what are the magazines calling it now? Oh, yeah, the 'exotic look'."

"Yeah, yeah, anyways, as I was saying while you were ignoring me, you have a photo shoot in an hour, so you should probably go get ready for that." Rick gave Tatsuha a stern look. "Don't skip out on this one like you did last time."

Tatsuha tried to look innocent. "I got caught up in traffic. It wasn't my fault." Tatsuha was certain that the older man knew that he was lying. That last photo shoot had taken place when a limited release of Ryuichi Sakuma's old solo album was going on, and Tatsuha had skipped the shoot to go get the CD.

Rick rolled his eyes. "Well, just make sure you don't skip this one, or I will have to take drastic measures."

"Really?" Tatsuha asked, curious. "Like what?"

"I know where you keep your Lover-Boy fan junk."

Tatsuha pouted. "You can't touch my Ryuichi stuff. That's just mean."

Rick walked over to the office's door, pausing in the doorway to look at the younger male. "As long as you go to the photo shoot, we won't have a problem now will we?" And the agent left the room.

Tatsuha didn't think it was too childish to stick his tongue out at the retreating man.

"I saw that."

Tatsuha stared. Sometimes working with Rick Sharpe was scary.

-x-x-x-x-

Tatsuha missed the comforts of home once in a while. Even though he had made a good life for himself here in America, he couldn't help but think that it would have been an even better life if he had still been in Japan.

It hadn't been easy, that was for sure. Tatsuha had been really young when he had taken his savings to buy a ticket to the States. He hadn't had much besides a little bit of exchanged money, a small understanding of English and high hopes. Unfortunately, that didn't help him survive on the streets.

It was luck that had helped the poor teen. Rick Sharpe had stumbled upon him, and, ultimately saved Tatsuha's life. Tatsuha had been extremely lucky that Rick had found him when he did, otherwise who knew what would have happened.

Actually, Tatsuha knew exactly what would have happened, but he hated thinking about it, so he pushed the thoughts away. That was in the past, no need to worry over it now.

"Tatsuha, if you're not going to pay attention, at least look at the camera."

The obsidian-eyed male blinked, taking in his surroundings. For a second, he had forgotten that he was in the middle of a photo shoot. Great, the photographer probably wasn't too happy about that.

"Sorry." Tatsuha muttered. Rick wouldn't be pleased if he heard that Tatsuha had been day-dreaming during a photo shoot, so he tried to focus on his task. It was a modeling job for some advertisement . Tatsuha was doing the photo shoot with another model. A beautiful brunette with big blue eyes. Tatsuha was strongly reminded of another who was even more gorgeous. However pretty the brunette was, the female model (Tatsuha hadn't caught her name) was a little too short to be the one Tatsuha wanted to be with, the body figure too curvy and left Tatsuha longing for that lithe, muscular body that Tatsuha knew better than his own.

He pushed that thought away. Ryuichi would never be his. It was just not possible. Even though the Nittle Grasper singer was why he had gotten into the modeling career in the first place. But being in the "celebrity" world, he knew how famous people worked, and he was certain that Ryuichi Sakuma would maybe want a one-time deal, but it would never develop into anything Tatsuha wanted it to.

Before he could get yelled at again, Tatsuha focused on getting done with the photo shoot. Even though he had started modeling so he could be in the same 'status' as Ryuichi Sakuma, Tatsuha still loved what he did. It was fun to pose for the pictures and he was able to travel and see a lot of different places that he would have never seen if he was still in Japan.

But that longing to be back at his homeland was hard to push away.

"Alright, I think that will be enough. Thank you Mr. Uesugi, Miss Clark." The photographer's voice was curt and dismissive. Apparently once the man was finished with his models, he wanted nothing else to do with them.

Tatsuha gave the other model a charming smile as they walked away from the beach. "Nice doing work with you, Miss Clark." The brunette blushed slightly.

"Please, call me Vanessa." She told him.

"Alright, I'll keep that in mind."

Vanessa glanced at him. "You're from Japan, right?" She continued when Tatsuha nodded. "I hear that your getting really famous."

Tatsuha shrugged, nonchalant. "Sure. I guess so. You'd have to thank my agent for that." He smiled at her. Vanessa blushed again.

"Would you want to do something later?" She asked, eyes staring at the sandy ground. Tatsuha hesistated. Vaness was really beautiful and everything, but...she looked so much like Ryuichi, even though she didn't have the adorable childish behavior. Going out with her would be like a constant reminder of what he couldn't have.

"Er...like a date?"

Vanessa seemed confused. "Well, I was hoping that it would be a date." Tatsuha pretended to think for a second.

"Oh, I don't think I can't. My agent has me booked solid for the next couple of months." Vanessa looked a little hurt.

"Oh okay. That's fine. I gotta go." She smiled slightly. "My limo's here."

Tatsuha gave her a small smile. "I am sorry." Vanessa shook her head, and waved as she walked away towards her awaiting car. Tatsuha felt slightly bad for turning her down. But he just couldn't make himself be with anyone. He knew it was hopeless to be so set on being with Ryuichi Sakuma when it would never happen.

But, really, Tatsuha didn't care.

-x-x-x-x-

Tatsuha was laying comfortably on the couch in his room, staring up at the ceiling. He wondered what was happening with his family. What was happening back in Japan. Was his father furious that his youngest "obedient" son had moved away? Was Aniki still that silent bastard? Was he and Shuichi still together? What would Mika say if she knew her brother was a model?

He remembered that when he had told them about his plans, they had all laughed at him. They hadn't thought he was serious. It kind of hurt that his own family hadn't thought that he could do what he wanted to. They hadn't believed him.

Just like they hadn't believed him when he told them that he loved Ryuichi Sakuma. He had known when he was 13, that he had strong feelings for the lead singer of Nittle Grasper. No one had believed him. What did he know? He had only been 13.

However, Tatsuha had known that his feelings were true to Ryuichi. Sure, he had dated a million different girls, and had played at being an obsessive hormonal teenager with too much time on his hands, but they had meant nothing to him. He never dreamed of them, never wished to be with them at all times, never spend hours just staring at a photo of them. All of that was reserved for Ryuichi Sakuma.

It was hopeless. It was sad. He was a 20-year-old and he still had really strong feelings for a 35-year-old man from when he had been 13.

There wasn't much hope for that.

For 7 years, he had felt love for a man he didn't hardly know. It was crazy.

A knock on his door made Tatsuha jump and slip off the couch falling onto the floor.

"Ow..." Tatsuha mumbled to himself. He turned his head towards the door. "Come on it, its open." Grumbling to himself, Tatsuha picked himself up, sitting back on the couch.

Rick walked into the room. "Have a nice fall?" He asked, eyebrow raised.

Tatsuha glared at the older man. "How is it that you know everything?"

Rick just smiled. "Get yourself packed. We're going on a trip."

-x-x-x-x-

Tatsuha didn't think it was that weird for Rick to tell him to pack for a trip out of the blue. It wasn't the first time his agent had an idea for a spontaneous excursion.

And, of course, the older man never told him where they were going.

"Just tell me. I'm going to know once I get close enough to see the flight screen thing anyways."

Rick shook his head. "Ah, but torturing you is just so much fun." Tatsuha grumbled at him, adjusting his disguising sunglasses, moving forward in the seemingly never-ending line.

"Why are you so mean to me?"

"That, my young friend, is what they call "tough love"." Rick told the model, smirking.

Tatsuha looked at him. "I thought they called it "evil"." The agent shrugged, smirk still in placed.

Slowly they moved ahead in the line before Tatsuha could finally see where the flights were listed. He glanced at the screen, and then at his ticket.

Flight 125-----Destination--> Tokyo, Japan

"What! We're going to Japan?" Tatsuha demanded, glaring at the other male. Rick grinned.

"Why, yes, we are."

Tatsuha shook his head. "No, I'm not going back. I don't want to go back."

Rick looked around at them, they were attracting stares. "If you don't want to get recognized, you might want to keep your voice down." Once Tatsuha had calmed down, Rick continued. "And yes, you can go back. It's your home. Don't you want to see your family."

Tatsuha sighed. Yes, he really did want to see his family. But that was a disaster waiting to happen. Would they even recognize him? Would they even care that he came back?

"I guess. Not really, though."

"Great." Rick said cheerfully. "Besides, its the perfect oppurtunity to take some photo shoots in Japan while we're there. That way, everyone's happy.

Tatsuha rolled his obsidian black eyes. "Yeah, ecstatic."

-x-x-x-x-

Tatsuha had never been afraid of heights, but he had never been exactly comfortable being in a plane for a long period of time. Just the thought that something could go wrong at any minute...

Tatsuha sighed. He knew he was just trying to avoid thinking about what was happening. He was in a plane, on his way to Japan. Japan. They would be arriving in a couple more hours, and then he would be in Japan. Which wasn't New York. Which was where most of his family lived. He wasn't sure how he was feeling about this. He sort of wanted to see his family, but dreaded meeting with them again.

But none of that really mattered. No matter his doubts, he was going home for the first time in four years.

He was going home.

-x-x-x-x-

A/n: Yeah, I should really be working on "Catch Me", but I work on this one while waiting for inspiration, and one night, more than half this fic came out. And then, I had to share with on here. So here is my newest twist in the Gravitation world. I actually like this one. Its definitely an odd little idea. Hope everyone enjoys it. I liked writing it. It was fun. Besides, Tatsuha being a model is just...awesome. ;p He needs some recognition too.

-x- LuV -x-