|A Job for Sanosuke Omake
Author: Shirou Shinjin PM
With AJfS finished, it's time to take one final potshot at the longsuffering characters. Raised rating for slightly... suggestive content in the first omake.Rated: Fiction M - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,591 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 4 - Published: 04-21-06 - Status: Complete - id: 2905219
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
A Job for Sanosuke
Omake 1 – An Overheard Conversation
By Shirou Shinjin.
Disclaimer: I have not, do not, and most likely will never own Rurouni Kenshin, or its characters. They belong to various evil corporations, and the wonderful Watsuki-sama. I'm just going to borrow them for a bit, k?
None the less, it only took a few moments for an ecstatic Tae to drag Sano upstairs. For some reason, Tae had been all hyper this morning, and it was starting to creep him out. Tae never got like that unless she was up to something. Even Tsubame seemed to be... quiet... well, more quiet than usual... as if she was dreading something.
Throwing caution to the wind, he crept up the stairs to see if he could overhear anything useful.
"No. Absolutely not! I am not doing it!"
"Pleeeeeeease, Sano-han?" Now this was interesting...
"What kind of a man do you think I am?"
"But... you promised you'd do this for me..."
"Anything else, Tae—anything! Suppose Jou-chan found out, or... or the kitsune..."
"Sanosuke, it's either this or the money. Then again, there's always the alternative involving handcuffs..." Handcuffs?
"I'll do it naked—I don't care! Anything but that!"
"Quickly—strip out of those so we can get started!" What the... why did Tae want Sano to strip! What could she possibly want him to do that... Yahiko didn't really want to think about it, now that he came to it.
"I don't think this is going to work, you know."
"Oh, and why's that?"
"I'm too big."
"Rubbish. It should fit like a glove."
"I'm telling you, I'm too... ugh... big... ugh." Now Sano was making grunting noises! What was going on in there!
"Oh stop being a baby—just try harder." Now he could hear banging noises coming from inside. Whatever was going on in there, something was bouncing up and down like there was no tomorrow...
"Can't... get... head... through..." Through what!
"Just push a little harder, Sano. It's not going to bite you."
"Wouldn't surprise me. I'd hate to tear anything..."
"That's sweet of you to say, Sanosuke-han, but it should be more than flexible enough to put up with a little stretching."
"Very good, Sanosuke-han. That wasn't so bad, now was it?"
"Well now that you mention it, it's... hey! Yes it was! And it's still pink!"
"Yes, yes... are you coming now, Sano?"
"Sano!" he heard Tae cry. That was it. Yahiko didn't know what was going on in there, and he didn't want to know. He backed away from the door, and stumbled down the stairs as quick as he could. When he heard sounds from upstairs, he quickly picked up the broom and gave it a few token sweeps.
Still, all weird thoughts were pushed out of his brain the moment he saw Sano... and promptly passed out.
While this wasn't a complete accident, I certainly never wrote that section of the story with this in mind.
When I write scenes like this, I tend to just write out the dialogue without any description, and add that in later to make the scene a little clearer. But when I read back over the dialogue, I suddenly realised that it could be... misinterpreted.
Rather than rework it to avoid that, I reworded it to enhance the effect as much as I dared, then added lots of description to counteract that. And so this omake was born... and has been hiding in the second chapter the whole time. Having lived with the yakuza as long as he had, and considering what he mother had been doing before she died, it wouldn't surprise me in the least if Yahiko knew exactly what he thought he was hearing.
But I like to think that at his age, he'd rather not deal with it. Besides, everyone seems to be suffering a severe case of denial in this story...
Until next time,
22nd April, 2006