Note: The votes are in, and it’s very close between Kasumi and Nabiki. Well, I’m pretty sure that Kasumi has one or two more votes than nabs, I’ve got a better plot line set out for the middle Tendo then the eldest, so the author’s vote, 5Reader votes, is for Nabs. I can’t believe that there was such a small turn out for the tomboy of the family, but then again it makes it so I don’t have to put in NEARLY as much angst, which is good in my opinion. Angst is bad… at least when I write it.

Chapter 2. The life and perversions of Ranma Saotome.

Ranma rolled over in his bed, snuggling into the warm covers. This was a definite improvement from his normal sleeping arrangements in the Tendo guest room. Feeling a tugging sensation on one of his arms, he batted it away. “Ge Away, Oyaji. Lemme sleep!” He said, before tucking his head under the blankets with the rest of him.

Feeling a small weight landing on his side, Ranma looked out of his blankets to see a grinning girl looking down at him. “I ain’t an old man, Ranma!” She said, trying to act indignant. “Mom says that you gotta hurry up or you’ll be late for school.”

Ranma bore a look of non-recognition for a moment before the memories of the day before came back to him. “Oh, Right. Get offa me, would ya Ranko?” He asked, as he tried to get up. The girl obliged, running out of his room and down the hall. Ranma picked up his school bag from next to the bed where it had been dropped the day before, apparently without him noticing, and he realized that it was rather light. Looking into it, he saw some school work, along with something else. He grimaced in disgust as he pulled out a copy of a sailor moon doujinshi. “Man, what is all of this crap doin in my room?” He muttered, chucking the rather strange manga material into his waist basket with a large number of it’s fellows. Pulling open a dresser drawer, Ranma cursed as he saw a whole bunch of Furinkan boys uniforms, all of which were slightly ill fitting on his normal form, not to mention his cursed one. Digging around a little he found what looked like a dress shirt and pair of casual pants in the bottom of the drawer that fit him, mostly. It wasn’t as good as his Chinese clothes, but it would have to do.

About five minutes later, Ranma walked down to the kitchen table and plopped down at it. Seeing a large pile of pancakes in the middle of the table, he scooped a bunch of them out and piled them on his plate. Once he had put on a satisfactory amount of butter and syrup, he began to munch. He didn’t eat much American food, but it was pretty good for a change. He smiled as he noticed that Genma was eyeing his plate covetously, but hadn’t attacked it yet.

After totaling a rather large stack of pancakes, Ranma slung his backpack over his shoulder and headed for the door.

“Ranma, where are you going?” Nodoka asked, looking after him.

“Heading to school. Why?” Ranma asked, looking back to his family. “I do gotta go, right?” He asked, a bit of hope entering his voice that he could skip it.

“Yes, but you have to take your sister with you.” Nodoka said, looking disapprovingly at her son as if she had said this many times before. To the Saotome mother’s surprise, Ranma got an expression of understanding, rather than his usual sullen and annoyed grumbling.

“Oh, Okay. You ready to go, Ranko?” Ranma asked, looking to the young girl who was just finishing tying her shoes. Ranko nodded enthusiastically before the two headed out.

As Ranma and Ranko walked to school, The elder Saotome hopped up to a fence top, strolling along it with his arms behind his head. “What are you doing?” Ranko asked, looking up quizzically at her brother.

“Balance practice. It’s an important part of Anything goes.” Ranma said, in a voice that sounded like a dojo Sensei. Then, he got a crooked grin on his face. “Not to mention that it’s fun.”

“Can I try?” Ranko said, eagerly looking up at the rail that her older brother was walking on.

Ranma looked surprised. Akane, or anyone else for that matter, had never asked something like that. He was really beginning to like this girl. Smiling and hunkering down on the fence, Ranma stretched out his arms and the little girl grabbed them, being hoisted up onto the top of the chain link barrier. Ranma held her shoulders, as she began to slowly walk her way along the fence, wavering a little bit but quickly being caught by her brother. “There ya go. Don’t push it.” Ranma advised, slowly and carefully releasing his grip on the short redhead. She began to walk, and then increase speed.

“I’m doin it!” Ranko called, as she got to a normal walking pace.

“you do know that everyone can see up your school dress like that.” Ranma commented, casually.

Ranko let off an indignant and embarrassed squeak, as she looked down to see her pleated school skirt. Unfortunately, she hadn’t really gotten the hang of rapid movement and balancing yet, and toppled to the side. Moving rapidly, Ranma moved to catch the overbalancing girl, but cursed as he saw that the fence was currently part of a bridge that was going over a canal. With a splash, Ranko found herself being held in the arms of a teenaged redhead, who was standing knee deep in the water of the canal.

“Serves you right!” Ranko said, sticking her tongue out at her elder sister. “You shouldn’t have embarrassed me like that!” After saying this, she gave a playful bop to the top of Ranma’s head.

All Ranma did was laugh. “The look on your face was so good, though.” She said, smirking at Ranko. Then she realized what she was doing. She had been fooling around with the younger girl like they really were siblings. He had only been around here, wherever here was, for half a day and she seemed reasonably comfortable with it. She guessed that it must have been because she was just grateful for getting out of the situation with saffron, but still found it strange.

“Ranma, you okay?” Ranko asked, snapping her fingers in front of the taller redhead’s face from where she was still being held in her arms.

“uh? I’m fine. Let’s get you to school.” Ranma said, hopping from the canal and back to the street above with minimal effort. Ranko just hung on and enjoyed the ride.

After dropping Ranko off at her school, Ranma realized that she had a problem. That being that she was a girl. “Oh well.” She muttered, while sprinting towards Furinkan. She would have to get some hot water at the bathrooms there.

As Ranma approached the front gates of Furinkan high, she saw the forms of many boys lining up in front of the front entrance. ‘Oh no. Not them!’ She thought, as she ran past. Luckily, none of the horde O’ Hentai seemed to notice the new girl, as they were focused on Akane.

From her perch at a second story window, Nabiki wasn’t nearly as unobservant as the hentai horde. Curiously, she watched as the short redhead made her way into the school. She would have to get some info about her later. Taking her eyes from the girl’s path, Nabiki wondered where Saotome’s stooges were. They were usually around somewhere, but the ringleader seemed to be missing. Hiroshi and Daisuke were around, but they were mostly followers, and without their leader they just hung around listlessly. She would have to find out where Ranma Saotome was, as well.

HR

That morning passed pretty smoothly for Ranma. True, he got sent out to the hall for sleeping once, but that was rather standard procedure. Hiroshi and Daisuke kept giving him some strange looks as well, but he didn’t have a clue why.

At lunch, Ranma was sitting under a tree when his two friends showed up. “Hey, Ranma.” Hiroshi said, settling next to the pigtailed martial artist, who was eating a bento packed by his mother.

“Hi Hiro, Dai.” Ranma said, looking up at the two friends with a smile.

“You okay man? Daisuke asked, noticing how Ranma was wolfing down his food. “You didn’t call last night like you said you would.”

Ranma looked confused. “Um… Call? I was supposed ta call you guys?” He asked, blinking.

“Yeh. For the CS game, remember?” Hiroshi said, grinning. “We were gunna play on some of those Gaijin servers and show them what Japanese can do!”

“CS?” Ranma asked, even more confused.

“Counter strike. You know, the computer game.” Daisuke said, snapping his fingers in front of Ranma’s face like he was trying to bring him back from the dead. “You gotta remember CS. I know your mom said that you weren’t feeling well when we called last night but this is serious.”

“Look guys. I ain’t feeling too well today.” Ranma said, trying to get out of this situation about which he knew nothing. “I gotta go talk to Nabiki about something.”

“YOU are going to go and talk to Nabiki?” Hiroshi asked, raising an eyebrow. “Good luck. Oh, is the raid still on for the gym class this afternoon?”

To this, Ranma just looked confused while Daisuke elbowed Hiroshi hard. “Shut up.” He growled, seeing that two of the girls from their class, Yuka and Sayuri were looking at them with disgusted looks.

On the other side of the school yard, Nabiki narrowed her eyes as she saw Ranma Saotome walking towards her. ‘He’s coming to me. Interesting.’ She thought, nibbling on a piece of excellently prepared sushi from her older sister. “So Saotome, what can I do for you?” Nabiki asked, as Ranma walked up.

“Look Nabiki. I got a REALLY strange request for ya, and I don’t want ya to question what I’m gunna ask, all right?” Ranma asked, having thought of this idea during his time holding buckets. He had realized that, if he didn’t remember something as important as a little sister, there could be other important things he didn’t know that he needed to find out. Nabiki was the best way to get that information.

Nabiki raised her eyebrow. “Well, I suppose that can be arranged, IF it isn’t harmful to my family.” She added, chips of ice floating in her tone.

“All right. I want ya to give me all the info you got on…” Ranma looked embarrassed as he prepared to say the next word. “Myself.” After saying this, he pulled out about five thousand yen and handed it to the girl. He had found the rather large, for him, amount of money hidden in a drawer in his room, and had pocketed it just in case.

“Interesting.” Nabiki muttered, fingering through the stack of bills. “Isn’t this the money that you like to buy those comics of yours with?” She asked, disgusted.

To Nabiki’s surprise, Ranma mirrored her slightly disgusted look. “Just give me the info I want, all right?” He asked, annoyed.

“All right, all right. Why so anxious about a pointless request.” Nabiki grumbled, before starting to recite her file on Ranma. “Age, 17. Grade level is second year. Group of friends, Hiroshi Neomoto and Daisuke Aida. Favourite activity, computer games and spying on the girls gym classes. Known enemies, Akane Tendo, Tofu Onno and Hikaru Gosunkugi. Also, I’ve heard that there’s a new boyfriend of Akane’s that’s out for your blood. People that just don’t like you include most of the student body, most notably Ukyo Kuonji. Anything else?”

Ranma blinked. “Okay… so what did I do to Ukyo?” He asked.

Nabiki laughed. “Well, THAT one was more your father’s fault then yours. You’ve just got a pretty good case of guilt by association, plus the fact that she doesn’t exactly enjoy being peeped on.”

“And the doc?” Ranma asked, having been curious about what Dr. Tofu was mad about for the entire time since he had first noticed it.

Nabiki’s face became VERY cold at this question. “Saotome, what game are you trying to play here?” She asked, glaring at him. “You had better give me a good answer.”

Ranma sighed. He knew that Nabiki would probably be selling this information right after he told it to her, but he really needed this information. What he had already heard was disturbing enough that he needed to know all of it in order to keep himself from being attacked by everyone in the area for saying the wrong thing.

Opening his mouth slowly, Ranma began to speak. “Well, Yesterday I apparently passed out while walking Ranko home from school.”

“apparently?” Nabiki asked, raising an eyebrow. “Wouldn’t you know if you passed out?”

“No. That’s the problem.” Ranma explained, frustrated that Nabiki would interrupt. “I can’t remember anything. Well, that’s not true. I remember my whole life, but what I remember is real different from what anyone else does. I don’t even have any recollection of having a sister until yesterday, and I don’t got ANY idea why the doc’s so pissed at me.”

“That’s quite a story.” Nabiki said, stretching slightly. “How much of it’s true?”

“All of it.” Ranma snapped. “You know I can’t lie to save my life.” He seemed embarrassed at admitting this one.

Nabiki blinked. She was VERY good at reading people. Usually, Ranma Saotome was very skilled at deception. He wasn’t, however, good enough to fool her. She made her living off of it, after all. What he had just said was said in complete honestly. He honestly thought that he couldn’t lie to save his life, and was quite open about it. Sighing, Nabiki decided to humour him. After all, this information would have a little bit of value for the people who wanted to keep track of the school’s resident pervert. Well, that honour really belonged to Tatwaki Kuno, so she supposed that Ranma was the school’s resident secondary pervert.

Ranma began to fidget s Nabiki thought, before he finally said something. “You gunna tell me or not?” He asked, annoyed.

“All right, all right.” Nabiki said, waving her hand in a calming motion. “Fine. The doctor is angry at you because of what you did to my eldest sister.” Nabiki said, her voice gaining an edge of ice near the end.

“What I did to…” Ranma asked, in confusion.

Nabiki shrugged. Apparently Ranma really HADN’T been exaggerating, and he couldn’t remember anything. “Well, our fathers got the insane idea to join our schools of martial arts about two years ago. This was really strange since your side of the school had no trained Heir and our side only had Akane, who daddy hadn’t trained ever since mother died. Well, first they tried engaging you to Akane. That went south fast when she attacked you for peeping on her and almost killed you. I had told the old fools that I didn’t want ANYTHING to do with you, so they decided to pass you off to Kasumi. Of course, with your.. rather strange view of girls and Kasumi’s excepting of pretty much anything…” Nabiki trailed off.

“I… I didn’t?” Ranma said, looking pale. “Not to… Kasumi?” He asked, an anger flaring in his eyes that he couldn’t decide where to direct.

Nabiki was surprised by Ranma’s reaction. Surprise, she could expect. Maybe a bit of remorse, but anger? “No. You didn’t. Dr. Tofu broke you two up, and almost ripped you apart. That’s when he and Kasumi started going together. They’ve been dating ever since. It was a good thing for my sister and Tofu that you did that, but he’ll probably never forgive you.”

“I see.” Ranma said, standing from his kneeling position near Nabiki and wandering off into the school yard. He wandered around, stunned. He couldn’t believe that he would do something like that. It was KASUMI, for Kami’s sake. The worst thing she had ever done while possessed by a DEMON was sow “Cross dresser” into the back of his shirt, and she had apologized profusely for days after that when the oni was exorcised.

When the bell rang to go back into class, Ranma’s head was still spinning. He kind of wanted to pummel anyone who would think to do something like that to sweet, kind Kasumi, but beating himself up was NOT on his fun things to do list. Vowing that if he ever met the version of him that had done that to Kasumi he would beat it into a bloody smear, Ranma walked into the school building.

HR

In the pits of the Nifelheme of another dimension, the soul of Ranma Saotome let off a loud sneeze. “Get back to work, dog!” A devil yelled, poking the boy with a pitch fork. “Yes, sir.” Ranma squeaked, franticly pushing at the large boulder that he was supposed to push up a hill.

END.

Notes.

No Kasumi did NOT actually get touched. I shall NOT allow the primary tenant of Ranma ficdom to be destroyed by my careless action. “THOU SHALT NOT HARM KASUMI TENDO” is a commandment that I always shall follow. The alt-Ranma just came VERY close to violating the prime directive. non-Kasumi interference.