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Innortal
Author of 38 Stories |
No Need for Destiny
Chapter 20
No Need for Sibling Rivalry
Disclaimer: I don’t own this series or any other series. I am just floating an idea. I am making no money, nor plan to, off this venture. If you think of suing me over this, then grow up.
I would like to first personally thank all of those reviewing my stories. I enjoy reading your comments, and try to correct the grammatical errors I miss with my final read-through as well as my spell checkers. The suggestions you all make will help make this story better for everyone to enjoy, as well as allow my to fix some plot holes I may unintentionally leave. If you find any, let me know, and I will correct them and repost the chapters.
“She could have at least told them I was coming,” grumbled Ranma Saotome Kuramitsu as he stalked along the plains of Hell, making his way along a barren field towards the Supreme Tower, a mountainous crag that Daimakaichō Hild made her base of operations, much as Kami-sama and the Goddess community used the heavenly plains. And despite most legends, it was anything but as described.
After all, how many mortals ever made it there and back to report on it?
It didn’t have any lakes of water, just rivers of lava, more like an active volcanic range than a mountain range. It wasn’t meant to be inviting, cheerful, or even lovely.
And that was just the area of Nifelheim where the Demon Offices were situated. You didn’t want to know what Hel—you know, damned souls paying karma back through … well hell—was like.
“Slay the human!” cried an ogre of sorts, as it led a mass of wandering demons towards the pigtailed man.
“I get the feeling she did this in hopes I’d take out the trash,” muttered Ranma, as he held his right hand up, the tips of his fingers glowing a blood red, even in the low light of Nifelheim. “Neko Kijin Raishü Dan,” he muttered, swiping his hand parallel to the ground and towards the advancing horde.
The ogres didn’t have any time to scream before the vacuum blades struck, slicing through their ranks as if they were made of paper. By the time the attack had struck the hillside near them all of them were dead, their blood soaking the parched ground.
“Good thing I’m not a member of the Doublet System, huh?” he smirked as he continued on towards the obsidian spire he knew housed Hild’s office.
He hated coming at all to Nifelheim. Sure, the place stunk of chaos and challenge, but he hated mostly the fact that every time he came, it was usually filled with him having to fight his way to Hild’s office to meet her about something or another. Ranma had decided he would only meet her on Midgard/Earth after the last meeting in which his twin children by her had achieved Class One Category One Unlimited Status.
Of course, Hild had planned the ceremonies so Ranma would have to fight his way through the newest graduating class of demons and several Elder Demons to get to them. Really, you’d think demons that old would recall what he did in Nifelheim the last time he was there.
But no; once again he was slicing a path, leaving death, destruction, and blood in his wake.
“You’d think they’d be nicer to the guy sleeping with their boss,” he muttered, backhanding a brass demon that had tried to strike at him from the side. “I swear, one more time and I’m going to atomize this whole damned dimension.”
Finally, the slaughter ended as he reached the Tower in which Hild’s office was.
“Elevator ready for you, sir,” said a minor cat demon—someone probably hired by Hild once more to mess with him—beckoning Ranma inside.
“If I get in there and something other than me making it to the top safe and sound to speak with Hild happens … I’m going to be pissed, and you’re going to be punted through the barriers into Asgard. Do we understand each other?” Ranma asked, glaring harshly at the hellspawn.
“Y-y-yes sir!” eeped the demon, quickly tossing out several items into a nearby trash bin—which promptly melted into a yellowish sludge.
Ranma just eyed the former trash can. “Okay, either she’s mad or she’s horny.” Entering the elevator, he continued to glare at the demon as they ascended the Obsidian Tower.
“Well sir,” stuttered the nervous demon, not wanting to be forced to restore his form if she happen to be torn to shred, “she is meeting with two of the best, Lady Sherra and Lord Xellos.”
Ranma sighed as he began to rub his forehead. Great; kids probably got some weird idea and she’s blaming me for it.
It wasn’t the first time Hild had blamed him for their children doing something she considered ‘wrong’. If they screwed up, she would call them ‘his’ kids. When they became high-class demons in record time, they were ‘her’ children.
The elevator chimed as the door opened, allowing Ranma into the entrance pavilion for Hild’s personal office. The secretary, a succubus, smirked as Ranma approached.
“Well, hello, stud,” she purred, slowly standing as she locked onto his form with her eyes like a hungry predator spying poorly guarded meat.
“Nina,” murmured Kuramitsu, a ball of life energy gathering in his hands. “I take it I am expected?”
“Oh yes,” she purred, eyes torn between the life energy and the source.
“And you’ll make sure we are not disturbed, correct?” he asked once more, the ball of energy doubling.
Words fled her as she nodded quickly. That much energy was more than she could gather from a dozen men … on a good week, and that is if she—pardon the pun—sucked them dry. What more, the energy gathered in his hand was pure and filtered life force, extending its value immensely.
“Good,” Ranma purred, tossing the ball towards her.
Nina caught it between her hands, eyes bright as she slowly absorbed the energy. She’d be at it for minutes, since she didn’t want to give herself a stomachache. Energy could be like ice cream: too much too quickly could be bad for your head.
Ignoring the succubus and knowing that their agreement would already have the pavilion locking others out, he entered the office, spying his target before him.
At her desk, Hild sat in a pose reminding Ranma of Gendo Ikari, hands poised and clasped before the mouth, dark shadowed eyes glaring at him as if they were tossing daggers.
On either side of her stood two familiar demons, marks and rings on them stating how much power they were suppressing, dark purple hair—something that still shocked Ranma as he didn’t remember that color being in any of his family members … unless Genma Saotome had purple hair before he went bald, and large smiles on their faces.
Oh this ain’t good. The sheer looks he was receiving—glare from Hild and smirks from their children—told him as much.
“Dear,” said Hild, her sweet voice at odds with her scowl, “your children have just asked me for a favor, a favor they will need of you as well.”
“Oh?” Ranma said, trying to hold in any fear. Just because Hild was a tenth-dimensional entity with the second highest power level on the planet for a New God didn’t scare him.
Feminine anger: he’d be a fool not to be scared.
“Xellos and Sherra wish to … strike out on their own,” she grumbled, eyes lowered slightly.
“Okay,” said Ranma, moving forward and taking a seat in the left guest chair before Hild’s desk. “And exactly how far are we talking about for striking out on their own?”
Xellos continued to smile, his head tilted to the side. “Oh, not far; we were thinking maybe … Avalon.”
Ranma’s eyes narrowed. “And may I ask how you two learned about that?” he asked. Avalon and Edo were very classified. Aside from the Almighty, Hild, himself, Nabiki, Ran, and Enma; no one else should even have any knowledge of those two systems.
“Like there isn’t a damned secret we can’t fucking find out about,” snorted Sherra with pride.
Ranma winced slightly. Damned if she didn’t have a mouth for cursing … in all languages.
“What can I say, they received my computer skills,” smirked Hild, making him wonder just how long they had been sitting on that piece of info, let alone how long Hild had known that they had acquired that information.
Ranma continued to stare ahead. “Can I assume truthfully that those of Nifelheim who know about the Sealed Systems are in this room?” asked Ranma. “I’ve already dealt with one demon-god on an insane power trip and finished with a fraction of him that got loose, I’d rather not deal with a demon with ambitions of glory and greener pastures on another world.”
“Not at all,” said Hild. “But your children wish to start anew on Avalon. They feel our relationship may have … paved the way for their greatness.”
“I see,” muttered Ranma as he rubbed his forehead. No matter what age or what species … raising his kids never got any easier.
“Well?” asked Akane, tapping her foot while staring at her fiancé.
Ranma just sighed. It was if as if there really was a curse on him.
“Oh, I’m Washu Hakubi,” replied the Goddess with a smile, giving Akane a polite bow.
“Akane,” snorted the bluenette. “Why is she here, Ranma?” she asked, a slight bit of anger getting through her voice.
Washu just continued to smile. “Why I’m here to visit my heart’s desire, the love of my life,” she said, voice so sweet everyone could almost swear that little pink hearts floated around her.
Ranma cringed, preparing to receive a mallet and wondering if this was more of his first wife’s version of payback.
“Come here, lover!” Washu squealed, as she grabbed her target, dipped them, and proceeded to take French Kissing to a whole new level.
Akane blinked in shock as the brazenness of the scene before her.
Ranma blinked as well, shocked at how things were turning out.
Nabiki would have yelled out in shock, had Washu’s tongue not been involved with checking her tonsils.
“Um … I … I need to go,” Akane stuttered quickly before grabbing Ranma’s hand and dragging him away, as Washu started to feel up Nabiki.
Ranma just looked away. Oh my wife is evil. If I look at her molesting Nabiki, Akane will bash me. If I don’t, Akane will demand to know why I was there in the first place and what was taking me so long.
Oh well, better Nabiki than me, he thought, following Akane out as she quickly closed the door, extra padding installed a few months ago all that kept the wooden door from making a loud sound.
“I … I can’t believe Nabiki likes… I mean, sure she’s never… I…” Akane droned on in shock, trying to wrap her mind around the idea of her sister in such a relationship. The idea alone was nearly causing her mind to overload.
Ranma pretended to be confused, though it was far from the truth. He knew Nabiki for twenty millennia, and in all but a few cases, she had been the force behind bringing another into their sex lives—always female. Not that he minded all the time, he just counted himself lucky that Nabiki hadn’t seen fit to bring another guy into the mix. He may have been ready to offer his girl form to help bring their children into the world, but that was a far cry from allowing a guy near either of his forms in that manner.
Of course, it wasn’t Nabiki who had stuck her tongue into Washu’s mouth in the bedroom. It was Washu’s payback to Nabiki for keeping secrets, nothing entirely sexual about that.
Internally, he shuddered, wondering what she had planned for him.
Akane looked uncertainly at Ranma. “Did you know Nabiki was…?”
“Was what?” asked Ranma, scratching the back of his head and looking confused.
“You know,” growled Akane.
“Akane, I was raised by Pops; what makes you think I know anything your talking about?” Ranma responded in a huff. Seriously, he learned more about sex on Jurai—and later with Washu—than Genma ever taught him.
Sighing, Akane rubbed her forehead. She couldn’t believe he didn’t know what she was asking. “That Nabiki has a … a…”
“Girlfriend?” asked Ranma.
“Yes,” she hissed quietly, not wanting their conversation to float into Nabiki’s room. Quickly, she grabbed his arm and dragged him to her room, shoving him inside before quickly closing the door after her. “How long has Nabiki liked girls?” she asked.
Ranma gave her a hooded gaze. “Nabiki, as in the girl that squeezed my chest twice when I first got here?” he asked.
Akane blushed and looked to the side. Yeah, that should have been a pretty obvious sign now that she thought about it. Wait a moment; didn’t Nabiki call Ranma cute when he first showed up? Yeah, and he was a girl at the time too!
Ranma watched, holding back any laughter and keeping a straight face as he watched Akane run with what facts she had and jump to conclusions once again. Kind of fun to watch when it ain’t you, he thought.
“I can’t believe Nabiki is…” Akane murmured, conclusion set.
“So?” asked Ranma.
“What do you mean ‘so’?” asked Akane.
“Akane, I turn into a girl half the time. Ain’t like this is something new to me. I mean, when I get married, it ain’t like all of the sudden I’m going to be a guy all the time.”
Akane’s eyes went wide at that. That’s right, we don’t know if Jusenkyo will ever be right again. Her sight slowly turned to see Ranma, a sour look on his face as he stared out her window, her mind trying to come to grips with the idea that they might do … that … as both girls.
Ranma pretended not to notice as Akane’s thoughts took a new turn. A part of him had always wondered how Akane would take ‘that’ part of a relationship if they had it. He knew Nabiki never minded—hell, she down right reveled in sex with either of his forms and he was often hard pressed to deny her any union she desired. But he and Akane had never had a chance to discuss that possibility. He knew she could be friendly to him, but could she accept that duality aspect of his life? She was already having trouble with the fact Nabiki was apparently involved in a lesbian relationship with Washu. Would she have ever been able to do likewise if they had gotten together instead, if it had been him and Akane sent across time and space?
Well, I came back here to find out what if. Nothing stated I had to like what I find.
“I … I guess so,” mumbled Akane. I need to think about this. She knew Ranma’s mother was already on the fence with several of his … female admirers, and despite what she might proclaim to the contrary, Akane did care for him.
“Anyway,” Ranma said, trying to give her an out so she could consider everything without feeling pressured, “I came up here and told Nabiki, of course they weren’t doing anything like that when I did. She said she’d be down in a bit after they finished their chat. So I’m gonna head to the Dojo now so you all can have your girl talk,” he finished with a smile as he made his way out the door.
Akane nodded, soon following. Maybe she was lucky that Auntie was in the kitchen right now. She felt like she needed a good talk with the perfect person to help her.
Lina Inverse grumbled as she made her way down the stairs of the Inn, hoping breakfast would be ready, hot, and in large portions.
The Claire Bible had been found, but once again the golden dragons were holding her back from gathering more information, claiming she was not ready.
Seriously! I’ve had the Golden Lord L-sama possess me, I’ve fought pieces of Ruby-Eye Shabranigdo, I’ve faced Mazoku wishing to end the world dozens of times over, and they won’t let me study the Claire Bible some more. What a gyp!
Apparently, Milgasia was still a tiny bit upset about the last time they had been there.
They had come back to the Kahato Mountains after their latest adventure, Lina wishing to know more from the Claire Bible in hopes of creating her own weapon of Light since Gourry gave his away to Sirius—he knew I wanted that!
Oddly enough, she had also run into Zelgadis—who nervously admitted that that was where he was headed as well in hopes of getting the Golden Dragons to let him use the Bible to determine a cure for his own curse. It wasn’t much of a shock, since that had been his original goal when they had first met.
It had only been a shock that they had taken what was supposed to be the quickest path there and Zelgadis still beat them to village nearest the mountains.
They had been trying for weeks to get permission from Milgasia to reenter the dimension of the Claire Bible. Time after time the trio made the trek through the natural labyrinth of the Dragon Valley. Time after time, Milgasia would bring them back to the village from Dragon’s Peak.
“MISS LINA!”
“Gah!” cried the sorceress, the morning still too early for her to be fully prepared for the flying tackle of princess of Seyruun.
“Miss Lina! I’m so happy to see you again!”
“Damn it,” muttered Lina, as she struggled to sit up. “Amelia, we’ve only been apart for less than two months!”
“But I still missed you,” sniffed Amelia. “Are you saying (sniff) that you didn’t miss me?” she said, her eyes watering.
“Stop that,” sighed Lina. “Fine, I missed you, Gourry missed you, and I’m pretty sure even Zel missed you too,” she said, hoping that if she covered everyone, the water-works would dissipate and she might be able to make it quickly to the breakfast table.
“Mister Zelgadis missed me too!” squeaked the happy Princess, a light blush forming on her cheeks.
“Um, Amelia, not that I’m not happy to see you or anything,” said Lina, her mind sparking once again now that she’d been shocked enough to fully wake her up, “but what are you doing here? I thought you were headed back to Seyruun.”
“Oh I was,” said Amelia with a smile. “But Daddy had me deliver a very important message to Miss Filia!”
“A message?”
“Yes,” came a new voice from her side.
Blinking, Lina turned slightly, spotting a familiar blond sitting at a large table, loaded with food, cuddling a large egg. “Filia? What are you doing here?” she asked in shock.
Filia Ul Copt just smiled as she looked up from her care of Valgaav’s egg. “I received a message from the Jade Dragon.”
That sent Lina’s eyes even wider. “The Jade Dragon! What did he want?” she asked.
“Who’s the Jade Dragon?” asked Gourry as he stumbled down the stairs, hoping Lina had for some reason left enough food for him to eat as well. He knew it was a long-shot, but he still hoped.
Lina just palmed her face. “Gourry, seriously? You don’t even know who the Jade Dragon is?”
“Um … is he anything like Amelia’s dad, King Phil?” he asked, scratching his head as he made his way to the table.
“Fine, I’ll explain,” muttered Lina as she sat down as well.
“The Jade Dragon is the ruler of this world, wielder of magic beyond even the oldest and wisest dragons,” she started. “It’s rumored that he was even part of the battle that broke the Mazoku Lord Ruby-Eye Shabranigdo into seven pieces.”
“Wow,” said Gourry. “He sounds pretty strong.”
“He is,” said Filia. “They say he is older than this world, perhaps even older than the Lord of Nightmares, capable of striking down any monster that comes across his path. To challenge his authority is to ask for your death.”
“So then … where is he?” asked Gourry. “I mean, where was he when everyone was trying to end everything and all.”
“You idiot,” growled Lina. “The Jade Dragon usually stays out of the affairs of mortals unless he sees a reason to jump in. Since I was involved, he knew everything was in good hands,” she finished with a confident smile.
“I figure that would make him jump in all the sooner,” said Zelgadis, entering the dining area with a cup of tea.
“MISTER ZELGADIS!” cried Amelia as she tackled the chimera man.
“Serves him right,” smirked Lina, seeing the tackle had left the man’s tea all over his outfit and hair.
“So what does he want now?” asked Gourry.
“Well, obviously he has taken a great interest in our exploits and decided to offer us something,” smiled Lina.
“Actually, it is just a missive to the Golden Dragons about me,” said Filia. “The Jade Dragon stated that I am now in charge of the clan and if they try and eliminate the last Ancient Dragon that I am caring for, he will quote ‘use their skins to make new clothes for his family, their bones for furniture and weapons, and leave their souls in the hands of the Chaos Lord.’
“Of course, the list of punishments is probably going overboard a bit. But he really wasn’t happy when he heard about what happened to the Ancient Dragons.”
“Yeah, that does sound pretty bad,” mused Gourry, as Lina fumed that they weren’t mentioned at all.
Man, what does it take to get this guy’s attention? Shabranigdo for Gods’ sakes! Possessed by the Lord of Nightmares herself!
“Um … who is the Chaos Lord?” asked Gourry.
“Did you even go to school?” asked Zelgadis, wiping tea off himself as Amelia helped, constantly apologizing for making him spill his tea. “How can you not know the Chaos Lord?”
“Is he related to the Lord of Nightmares? She’s a chaos queen, right?”
“She’s the Sea of Choas from which all things spring from,” glared Lina. “The Chaos Lord is a figure of living magic, although his exact relation to the Jade Dragon isn’t really known. They speculate that he is a ruler of the supernatural world, dealing with things before the Mazoku and the Ryuzoku, in much the same way the Jade Dragon handles things in our world.”
“That’s … not a whole lot of information,” said Gourry, scratching his head.
“Nothing has ever been confirmed about them,” said Zelgadis, taking a seat at the table. “Even Rezo the Red Priest could only find bits and pieces about them. Accurate information on those two is even rarer than the Claire Bible manuscripts.”
“I wonder if the Claire Bible would have anything on them then?” asked Lina. “It had a lot on L-sama, and these guys played some hand in the battle between Ruby Eye Shabranigdo and the Flare Dragon Ceilphied during the Kōma War.” I wonder if that’s a good enough excuse to get them to let me enter the Claire Bible again. Surely Aqualord Ragradia had some information on them.
Oooooooh! I wonder what sort of spells I could get from calling on their power…
Her eyes went wide as she focused on Filia. “Filia, now that essentially you’re in charge of the Golden Dragons, do you think I could take another peek at the Claire Bible?”
“I’m afraid that won’t be possible at the moment,” came a familiar voice.
Lina paused in her rapid eating, turning slightly towards the door, spotting two very familiar figures with violet hair. One she was on good terms with, the other…
“AAAAH! ZOMBIE!” cried Gourry, as he fell out of his seat.
“Oh, she just looks like one,” offered Xellos with a smile.
“Oh stuff it, you arrogant little bastard,” snorted Sherra as she made her way to the table. It had been a while since her last meal. And even after absorbing solid pishogue, she still needed to supplement her energy until they returned to Earth. “Scoot over, I’m starving!”
“Wow, she seems so different,” muttered Amelia.
“How are you even still alive?” asked Lina, glaring at the female demon.
Sherra snorted. “Oh, like a little sword in the gut would kill me. All you did was put me to sleep,” she said.
“I was unaware monsters such as yourselves could consume food,” said Filia, glaring at the two Mazoku and holding the egg closer to her chest.
“Oh, we can eat it just fine,” said Xellos with a smile. It was true, as a Mazoku, he could manipulate his material-image to eat food, a trick many lower Mazoku couldn’t. Of course, they weren’t really Mazoku now, not after absorbing their mother’s gift. And demons—especially Class One category One Unlimited demons—could eat food just as easily as any mortal.
“Why can’t we go right now, Mister Xellos?” asked Amelia.
“Well, something important has come up,” said the former Trickster Priest. “As a matter of fact, it is probably best if Lina goes home right now.”
“Home?” asked Lina.
“Oh yes,” offered Xellos, as Sherra chuckled lightly.
“Is some creature from beyond planning to attack Zephilia?”
“Of course not,” waved off Xellos. “As if some fool would be stupid enough to do so.” Of course, it didn’t count that some creatures sent certain underlings to attack that town as a means of killing them without getting their hands dirty.
“Then why do I need to head home?” asked Lina suspiciously.
“Well, I’m sure your family misses you,” said Xellos.
“Not if they really know her,” snorted Sherra.
“You wanna take this outside?” demanded Lina, standing up and slamming her palms on the table.
“Anytime, Tiny-tots!” yelled Sherra, mimicking Lina’s attitude and reaction.
WHACK!
“DAMN IT!” screamed Sherra, holding the back of her head, as Xellos inspected his staff.
“Ah good,” he said, “no cracks.”
“Why the hell did you do that for?” Sherra demanded.
“Now Sherra, we are not here to fight,” admonished Xellos. “We simply came by to say hi and suggest that Lina return to her hometown and meet with her family. I’ve heard they miss her so.”
Filia blinked at that. “I thought she has an issue with Luna.”
“I’d hardly call it an issue,” snorted Zelgadis, remembering that story all too well. Although he would admit that he was interested in what sort of woman was able to put as much fear into Lina as if she was surrounded by slugs. Maybe I can shake her hand and ask her for the secret…
“No chance in hell,” proclaimed Lina. “If nothing is going on where they need my help, I’m not going!”
“But Miss Lina!” sniffed Amelia. “Don’t you want to see your loving family members?”
“Eh … sure I do,” Lina twitched, trying to placate the Princess of Truth and Justice. The absolute last thing she wanted was Amelia trying to drag her back to Zephilia. “But … well, we’re on a clock with getting access to the Claire Bible and all.
“In fact, we better head out now!” she said quickly, grabbing Gourry’s free hand—the other was grabbing what rolls he could—and made a dash for the doorway, the others following quickly so as to not be left behind in the labyrinth.
Smiling, Xellos’s red marks appeared, flashing slightly as he cast a silent spell, one he could do that would get past any and all protections placed on the target. After all, a powerful demon didn’t need to escort someone through his preferred medium.
Slamming open the door, Lina darted through, intent on making a quick trek to Dragon’s Peak. If nothing else, she’d be able to put off Amelia’s interest in Lina’s hometown for at least one more day.
She however was shocked to run into a dining area instead of the village streets. “What the…?”
“Well, well,” said Gwen, setting down her cup of tea, “I’ll be heading out now, Luna. It looks like I will need to get that funeral dress ready.”
That didn’t mean she had to walk out there looking like they did it. Unlike some of the rumor-mongers in the village, she had no desire to go broadcasting her activities to the world at large.
Fun to hear; not as much to be a part of.
“I forgot how utterly addicting you were, my dear,” murmured Enma, looking over her shoulder and into the mirror.
“I bet you say that to all the magic girls,” Lona giggled lightly, snuggling deeper into his embrace. She really missed having him around. Don’t get her wrong, she understood such a life just wasn’t possible for him … yet, but it didn’t make the pain of being apart any less. I have him now, though. I have him for the reunion and however long I can keep him here with me.
Hmm, maybe I can get Luna to run the store for a few months, go for a nice new honeymoon…
“I say it to the ones I make love to,” he whispered.
“That better be just the one then,” she murmured.
“I only married one magic girl,” he said with a teasing smile. “And I’m much too old for any childhood crushes I may have had on the Senshi.”
“Now the roles for that are reversed,” Lona replied. “Now you’re the Sempai they want and they’re the children with childhood fantasies.”
“I already have what I desire in my dreams,” he purred, casting a glance back at the bed. The time warp he had initiated was about to end, thrusting them back in sync with local space-time. As such, they’d be spending more time and missing the breakfast his loving daughter had prepared for them.
That and his lovers were never the ones to silently enjoy their passion. He learned that all too well during their visits to the Silver Palace within the Centauri System. The good news was that the males on staff quit clapping and asking for tips a few years ago.
The bad news was he wasn’t about to allow his wives near the females in case they wanted ‘firsthand experience’. Two wives were enough, thank you; and he had little desire to end up the ‘pony of the universe’ as his Father called it.
Staring into the mirror once more, he saw the glow of the woman he loved, her aura charged with her magic and her feelings. Love truly was a powerful force, not for what it was, but what it could do.
The Silver Millennium understood it, preached it, and were at times religious fanatics about it. But during the Sailor Wars, it was at times all they had to sustain them in the unforgiving void between stars.
His grandmother, the late Queen of Pluto, explained it to him in ways his tutors could never hope to approach. Stories, poems, epic tales of the true power of love, the power of a rare connection most people never even got to experience once in their lives.
Enma knew he was lucky to get it twice.
“This is one of the times I wish I knew Ran’s trick of going wherever he wants,” Enma muttered. “I’d love to simply slip into a room at the Palace and then pop up here the next.”
“No technology or spells to do it?” asked Lona with curiosity. She may have retired as a wandering sorceress, but that didn’t mean she didn’t like to keep learning new things.
“Not sure of spells, might be something in the Archives in the Palace I can check or something Ran can teach me from Tokimi. But most of the Senshi were for within the system. I’m pretty sure the Royals could do it, but it required linking their powers together to pull it off, and even then it was draining.
“There probably is a tech-way to do it. But those would likely either cut into the protections around the system.” There was a possible way to do so that he did know about, but it would involve setting something up within the subspace anchors originally used by him and Ran in their attempt to recreate Sol.
But several of those regions had been absorbed by L-sama during her formation. To be honest, they stayed out of those areas because like any New Gods, she wouldn’t part with her secrets willingly for nothing. It was also probably those absorbed subspace realms that explained why L-sama was so much more powerful than your typical New God. I hate to say it, but I’ll have to mention this to Father and see what he can … uncover.
“Are you okay?” asked Lona.
“Huh?”
“You just shivered.”
“Bad thoughts,” he murmured, as he felt time snap into place. Quickly wishing to change the subject, he led her to the door. “We’d best hurry, lest our loving daughter knock once again to tell us our breakfast is getting cold.”
She let him slither past the topic of whatever made him shiver like that. In all likelihood, she could coax it out of him. But their recent activities had left her feeling famished. She might not have been a Kuramitsu by blood, but because of her magical reserves, she needed to consume about as much as one.
“AHHH! Don’t kill me!”
“THEN STAND STILL! SPOT, TAKE DOWN!”
“FINALLY! PAYBACK, INVERSE! MWA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”
“FIREBALL!”
BOOM!
A shield sprang up around the two as the air displacement struck, blowing around them and along the walls, the shield protecting the entrance to their room—such a shield was a necessity with children like theirs.
“I guess Lina came home,” muttered Lona with a sigh. And she was so used to not having to replace the furniture so much.
“Cease this right now!” bellowed Enma, glaring through the smoke to see the assembled people. It soon began to clear, his gaze still locked on the forms of his daughters—said daughters still able to feel their father’s piercing gaze even through the smoky haze.
As the smoke cleared, the duo was revealed, Lina in a headlock as Luna prepared to give her a Shock-Noogie, energy slowly fading from her fist mere millimeters away from contact with Lina’s skull.
“What have we told you two about fighting in the house?” yelled Enma.
“She started it!” yelled Lina, still trying to extract herself from her sister’s hold. But as always, Luna’s grip never loosened.
“I don’t care who started it!” Enma yelled. “I did not spend all that time making a place for you two to spar with magic just so it could gather dust while you destroyed our home!”
Taking a calming breath, he walked towards the duo, ignoring the gathered people, until he was right before them. His angry expression softened as he pulled them into a strong hug, somehow untangling the duo. “I missed you, my children.”
“Ack!” cried Lina. Despite the fact she was glad to see her father once more and on some level happy to be home—though that level would prefer her sister to be far, far, far away—it was only for a moment before her mind remembered that her friends had come through with her. “Dad, let go! You’re embarrassing me in front of my friends!”
“Aww, it poor Wina embawassed by her daddy?” teased Sherra.
“Um, Zel,” murmured Gourry, leaning over towards his friend. “Does Lina know that guy? He seems kind of old for her to be dating.”
The chimera fought to keep a twitch off his face. “Gourry … that is Lina’s father. And before you ask: no, she is not dating her father.”
“That’s her Dad?” asked Gourry, blinking slightly. “He doesn’t look a thing like her.”
“She takes more after me,” said Lona. “Both of them do.”
“And who are you?”
Zelgadis just sighed, rubbing his temples. The guy couldn’t really be that thick, could he?
“This is so exciting!” cried Amelia. “We get to meet Miss Lina’s wonderful parents!”
Xellos chuckled lightly, enjoying the pure chaos of the moment. Perhaps after the reunion he would spend more time with his family here on Avalon. They were almost as chaotic as a sane Mazoku—and by sane he meant one not wanting everything destroyed.
After all, how would you exist if everything was gone?
“I take it you are Lina’s friends?” asked Lona, looking at the group. She could see two strong demons among them—likely the ones her husband had mentioned that needed a lift—as well as a weaker demonic energy within the chimera-male. A dragon-in-human-form female was holding an egg, though what types of dragons each were was a bit beyond her current skill level—Enma never taught her to give a distinction between types, just recognize species.
You’d be surprised how many ‘teen’ dragon males would take a human form and try to pick up humanoid women in a bar.
“Or as close as Lina can get,” offered Xellos with a smile. The best part for him was that Lina was still in her father’s grasp, and therefore unable to blast him.
Eyebrow twitching slightly, Lona waved towards the table. “If everyone will take a seat, I guess we should start having some breakfast.”
“Wow, that’s a lot of food, Miss Inverse,” said Amelia. “Did you know we were coming?”
“Um … yes, yes we did,” nervously answered Lona.
“I see,” muttered Madara Uchiha, as Pein informed him of the message delivered to Amegakure.
The Jade Dragon was coming…
He had seen that being once, before the Senju clan had come wishing an alliance to form what later became Konoha. Every so often, he would approach the clans and now apparently the ninja villages, offering them chances to send representatives to some ‘gathering’ the Jade Dragon offered. Those that impressed the man would either be allowed to serve within his personal guard or return to their homes and clans, new techniques and occasionally new bloodlines. The latter however was usually reserved for those that served within the Dragon’s guard for a century.
Yes, they would return the same age they had left with new abilities and techniques to share with their clan. In fact, all of the world’s great bloodlines could trace their lineage back to someone serving within this group.
And now he had returned.
“We must be careful,” Madara murmured. “The Jade Dragon is hardly a force we can easily deal with.”
“He is a nuisance,” said Pein.
The one eye Madara had exposed was now glaring at the Akatsuki Leader. “He is a force of nature more destructive than the Bijuu combined. He is the force behind many of the clans that formed, many of the techniques Orochimaru sought to learn.”
“It sounds as if he is the source of all conflict within our world.”
Madara turned his head slightly. The fool would likely seek out the messengers of the Jade Dragon once again if for nothing else than to continue his own personal crusade. “Your mission is to acquire the Jinchuuriki holding the Kyuubi no Yoko, nothing more. You will take no hostile acts towards the members of the Jade Dragon’s party. They are forbidden from interfering in the affairs of those in this world unless assaulted first.
“Tell me; was it you who struck first or the messengers of the Jade Dragon?”
Pein’s eyes bore into him, but did little to sway Madara’s anger.
“I thought so,” Madara replied. “Do hope that the beating you received was the last of their interaction with you.
“As it is now, by the time you arrive at Konoha to acquire Uzumaki, the messengers may be there as well. You will not strike at them and make every attempt to avoid them. I will not have our plans ruined because you were unable to see beyond the moment.
“Is that understood?” he asked, his voice leaving no room for discussion.
Pein stayed silent for several moments, before nodding.
“Then go,” stated Madara, standing up himself. If the Messengers were going out, then he needed to prepare his own responses. There were those among the Guard of the Jade Dragon he wished to see dealt with … permanently.
“Thank you, Midori,” sighed the Jade Queen. She could have done without the constant update on their expected time of arrival. The had taken to the road only a few hours ago, Aratakira wanting to enjoy the stroll through the forest, Midori scanning continuously for any possible assault, and Minaho just smiling with some slight nervousness.
“After we meet with the current Hokage, I think I may set out for that hot springs area just off to the west,” Aratakira mentioned. The place had really become developed and the last few years, a little difficult considering all the natural spring water was close to boiling at most places.
“As you request, Lady Aratakira,” sighed Midori. She just wanted to take a nap at the moment, maybe another attack by bandits or even Missing Nin to break the mood of boredom.
Then again, it was actually the two people she was guarding that had spent the most time dealing with the bandits earlier. She might have been wrong in wondering if there was the need for a larger security detail to protect the Crown Princess of Jurai and the Jade Queen.
Of course, none of those bandits had known either ninjutsu or magic. Chances were that any assault on the duo in or around Konoha would be infinitely more dangerous.
Of course, that might be her own ego trying to justify why two such dangerous and powerful people needed a security detail. Otherwise it would feel like she had been stuck on the assignment for no other reason than some form of punishment.
“Are you okay, Lady Minaho?” asked Aratakira, noticing her friend’s pensiveness. “You seem … nervous.”
“Just … concerned with what I may find,” offered the Jurai noble. She had after all come here, claiming there were answers in the Village to Arashi’s disappearance. If she was unlucky, it would be only a short time before it was discovered that the missing Arashi Kuramitsu had been Konoha’s Fourth Hokage Minato Namikaze. And after that, how long before they learned that Naruto Uzumaki was actually an heir to two of the most powerful empires in the galaxy?
“I do hope you find the clues you are looking for here,” offered Aratakira. “My family as well as myself, wish to thank you for making these efforts to find our lost family member.”
“Arashi was important to me,” whispered Minaho.
Aratakira closed her eyes for a moment. She knew the duo had been very close, perhaps enough to go against the political pressures at the time—not so much from the Seniwa as Jurai at the time, as the royals in the Court wouldn’t favor the two empires merging. She had always thought that Minaho knew more about her love interest’s disappearance than she had let on, more so after Arashi’s body and Tree Ship returned to PI. But one simply doesn’t accuse a foreign dignitary of hiding information without proof.
It was part of why the Jade Court had allowed her to accompany them to Edo. Minaho had stated there might be a clue to what occurred to Arashi in Konoha. It was something she wouldn’t have let slip normally, but it was something they could use as a starting point. The leads to what had occurred to Arashi were non-existent. His ship’s memory was either sealed or erased—a fact no one in the Family had thought possible, let alone being able to keep any information from PI. As such, they had no idea where the ship or Arashi had been for almost thirty years, so had no idea where to start. And even with the resources of Seniwa, it was a big universe to check.
This was why she and the others were willing to allow Minaho into the Sealed Systems. If Arashi had somehow been hiding here without anyone knowing, they needed to know.
“We have arrived,” offered Midori, as the group paused.
Off slightly in the distance, they spotted the massive wooden gates of Konoha, a small group at their entrance.
Minaho was thankful she had prepared enough for that moment as her enhanced eyes spotted the sight. There were four people before the gates plus one small elderly frog sitting on another frog. She had no doubt that Midori had spotted them as well, most likely cataloging the fact that one who wasn’t looking in their direction was blond.
But she knew better, she could feel it in her heart. His aura screamed out to her, screamed of who it was.
A mother never forgets her child. Naruto… You’re alive!
Her joy disappeared quickly, as the blond vanished in a puff of smoke, the two frogs soon following.
“Reverse summoning, Lady Aratakira and Lady Minaho,” offered Midori. “The young man was most likely a signer of the Toad Summoning Contract. The Toads must have used Reversed Summoning to take him to their homeland. It is quite rare for one as young as him to be summoned like that. Most Summons require their Summoners to make a journey to visit them by foot first. The Genin should feel honored that they would bestow training or a visit to them this early in his life.”
Minaho nodded once, glad for her son. He was alive at least. For now, she could only hope that he would return soon enough to be involved in the Gathering. If not…
Well, she’d rather not have to think about that. If she could get him off Edo, then—and only then—might she be able to explain things to him.
On Edo, it would be safer for him to remain Uzumaki and not Kuramitsu or Jurai.
The group continued towards the Gates, their presence enough to keep the three Konoha-nin from earlier at their last positions.
“Ah, Hokage-sama,” said Aratakira, bowing slightly.
“Who are you?” asked Tsunade, trying to maintain proper decorum.
The Jade Queen seemed to almost be holding in tears. “You … you don’t remember me?”
The Fifth Hokage sighed. “Listen, if it is about that debt, I am working it off by—ACK!”
She may have been known for her speed and skills, but they were no match for the flying glomp of the Jade Queen.
“WAAAAH! How could you forget me, Tsu-chan?” cried Aratakira, shocking the two Konoha-nin beside her that had been preparing to offer aid to their Hokage. “I know it wasn’t fifty years ago, but surely you remember me!”
“F-f-fifty years ago!” shrieked Sakura.
Minaho just chuckled lightly, wondering how much of Aratakira’s actions was an act and how much was real. After all, it was always a good idea to keep people on their toes.
Sighing, Midori raised her head; glad she had had the foresight to place a spell over her eyes to hide their presence. Recent reports had not been kind about the Uchiha that had remained on this world after her leaving. “May I present, Lady Aratakira, wife of the Jade Dragon.” She had hoped the announcement would explain a lot.
Seeing the blank looks on the two Konoha Chuunin didn’t fill her with any hope. Don’t they teach these children about the Jade Court and the rulers?
“Jade Dragon?” asked Sakura, turning to look at Shikamaru. She hoped the bright Chuunin would have heard of such a person.
Her eyes went wide as said person just shrugged.
“Jade Dragon!” Tsunade squeaked, as she looked at the woman hugging her. “B-b-but that was fifty years ago!”
“Forty-seven, actually,” offered Midori.
“Oh, I knew you’d blossom into a nice young woman,” offered Aratakira, smiling as she held the Fifth before her. “Though I have to admit the size of the blossom is a bit of a surprise. I certainly don’t remember your mother being that gifted.”
“Stop that!” yelled Tsunade, knocking Aratakira’s hand away from where it had been poking her … blossoms.
“Ah,” murmured the Jade Queen, “I see. You created a matrix to force your body to retain a youthful look while being able to key in specific modifications should the need arise,” she spoke, shocking the group at her serious reply. “You must have based it off some of the early talks we had with your Elders during the last Gathering.
“Granted, it is a good design given your working constraints… Perhaps we can give you some pointers to do so without causing a cellular breakdown.”
“Tsunade-sama,” started Sakura, “do you know these people?”
Sighing, Tsunade straightened her robes. “I do, though I am surprised that they didn’t teach you about them in the Academy.
“But first, I have to verify you are who you say you are,” she finished, giving an even glare at the visiting trio. “It wouldn’t be the first time someone tried to sneak in by claiming they represented the Jade Court.”
“And how is that done?” asked Shikamaru.
“We each have two pieces of what could be called a key,” offered Aratakira. “Each representative is given a Piece A, each Hokage or local ruler is given a Piece B. No two pieces are alike, nor will they work when combined except for in a very specific manner. When they are brought together, they will demonstrate beyond all doubt that we are the proper and legitimate envoys of the Jade Dragon,” Aratakira finished. With that, she held out her hand, which held a small piece of metal.
“So then where would our part be?” asked Sakura.
“Typically, it is usually stored in a hidden seal on the underside of the Hokage hat,” said Aratakira. “So … you’re the Hokage, where’s the hat, Tsu-chan?” she asked.
Tsunade actually looked nervous, fidgeting slightly as she tried to come up with an excuse why she never bothered to wear the damned hat. As far as she knew, it was in a closet … somewhere. It wasn’t like anyone had complained—except Shizune—when she didn’t wear it.
“Uh-hem.”
Blinking, Tsunade slowly turned towards her apprentice, who even now was holding out the Hokage hat. “May I ask why you even have that?”
Sakura tried hard not to look at all unease under her Master’s glare. “Shizune insisted I take it with me in case a dignitary arrived. You are supposed to wear the hat at all times,” she finished nervously, trying not to meet her teacher’s eyes.
Sighing and rubbing the bridge of her nose, swearing a headache was fast approaching, and muttering about apprentices who couldn’t leave well enough alone, Tsunade took the hat. Flipping it upside down, she noticed a nearly invisible seal now visible to her eyes. If she hadn’t been looking specifically for it, she had no doubt that she would have missed it. “Well I’ll be,” she muttered, as she added chakra to it.
With a small puff of smoke, the seal vanished, replaced by a small metallic item.
“That’s it,” smiled Aratakira, holding out her hand, which had a similar metallic piece. “Now, place this piece, characters up, on top of the piece that doesn’t look like it could slide onto your finger.”
Tsunade, Sakura, and Shikamaru blinked as it was explained.
“That sounds like it’s some sort of decoder ring they have in the cereals,” muttered Sakura curiously. She blushed immediately, thinking that she may have offended the visitors.
Minaho worked hard to suppress her desire to start laughing. The pinkette had no idea how correct she was.
With a small click, Tsunade connected the two items, causing them to begin to glow green.
“You’ll never take down Sgt. Floaty or my Brigade, Master Disaster!”
Those of Edo could only blink in shock of the voice coming out of the ring, the image of some kind of … fish/bird hybrid formed in the light above the token, speaking somehow in their language, wearing an odd military uniform.
Those not of Edo however, were fighting hard not to break down laughing at the items the Jade Dragon had used to offer proof of who his messengers were. After all, there was nowhere else on Edo where one could find a Sgt Floaty Decoder Ring.
“Well then,” muttered Tsunade, sliding the item into her pocket. With luck and assuming the scrolls on the proper procedures for dealing with members of the Jade Court didn’t forbid it, she could have a team work on figuring out the technology behind whatever it was, “I assume you would like to enter Konoha.”
“That would be nice,” said the Jade Queen with an honest smile. “We do have some items to take care of before I can try that new hot springs resort to the west. Not to mention my guest and my retainer, they have their own tasks to complete as well.”
“Oh?” asked Tsunade. Looking closer at the duo, she couldn’t spot anything obvious, other than the fact that somehow, the personal guard was somehow able to obscure her eyes, while the guest seemed somehow … nervous.
“Midori needs to deal with some clan issues in Konoha for when she completes her century of service to the Elite Guard, while Lady Minaho will be making inquiries into a member of the Jade who went missing some time ago,” offered Aratakira.
“And what clan is it you need to work with?” asked Shikamaru.
“Lady Aratakira?”
“You may,” the Jade Queen replied.
Nodding, Midori allowed the disguise field around her eyes to fade away, revealing to the Konoha ninjas the familiar eyes of a fully matured Sharingan.
“This is Midori Uchiha, member of the Elite Guards for seventy five years, since before your village was founded,” offered Aratakira. “She joined my husband in the same Gathering that gave two Senju brothers severe enhancements to their abilities.”
Tsunade’s eyes went wide at that. “You knew my grandfather and granduncle?” she asked.
The Jade Queen nodded. “They earned my husband’s respect. Had they joined his Guard, the gifts he imbued them with would have carried through their descendants as bloodlines. They chose to stay and guide their clan, thus it was not to be.”
It explained a lot to the Konoha-nin. It explained why the grand abilities of the First and Second Hokage had never carried down through blood. For those that knew, it explained why Orochimaru’s attempts to clone the ability of the First had failed so badly, why the one success wasn’t even close to the true power of the original.
“You’re in pretty good shape considering your age,” offered Shikamaru, blunt as ever.
“The Jade Court is well versed in many techniques,” replied Midori quietly. “I believe such techniques were the foundation for the one currently used by your Hokage. Though unlike hers, mine will only fade after I leave the Court.”
“So leaving is a death sentence,” spoke Shikamaru.
“Death comes to us all, unless we are deities, and even then such a thing is not certain,” she replied. “My clan was already dying when I joined the Elite. From reports, it has dwindled even more during my absence.
“If I return, I will need to be ready to ensure such does not become the Fate of my line.”
“But what about Sasuke?” asked Sakura.
“What about him?” asked Midori. “He chose his path and now must follow it, no matter what it will cost him in the end. What happens to this branch of the Uchiha is none of my concern.” With that, the blur around her eyes arose once more, her stance and general aura shifted, signaling that the discussion was finished.
“If I may ask,” interrupted Minaho, certain that the younger Konoha-nin would have tried in some manner to press Midori for more information, “who was that young man who was reverse-summoned?”
Tsunade wanted to deny such information, but she knew enough about the Jade Court that hiding things from them was never a good idea. “His name is Naruto Uzumaki.”
“He’s quite lucky then,” stated Minaho. “From what I know, the Summons very rarely offer training to their Summoners, especially if the Summoner has never traveled to their home beforehand.”
“Really?” asked Sakura, realizing she had never known that much about the ways of the Summons.
“How do you know Naruto’s never been to their home before?” asked Shikamaru.
“He was wearing a genin-level hiate,” replied Midori evenly. “Genin rarely if ever leave the village alone, let alone for the needed time to get to the region where the Summons exist. Therefore, he was given a grand honor,” she finished.
“Well, enough of this just standing around,” stated Aratakira, clapping her hands. “At this rate, we’ll be here all day and I really want to enjoy the local hit springs.
“Lady Tsunade, if you would be so kind as to lead the way, we can get the bulk of the official business out of the way. Then we can get to other business and finally I can get to see those springs before Hubby shows up.”
“Hubby?” asked Tsunade, paling significantly.
“Why yes,” smiled the Jade Queen. “Where else would he be when another Gathering has been declared?”
It was roughly a minute after Ranma and Akane had left before Washu removed her tongue from Nabiki’s mouth.
It was another three minutes before Nabiki’s mind successfully rebooted. “I can’t believe you did that!” she screamed, glaring in shock at her co-wife.
“Well, I can hardly be blamed for expressing my long-suppressed lust for my co-wife, can I?” she asked innocently.
“And you felt the need to … ‘express’ this with my sister in the room?” Nabiki growled out.
“Dearest, don’t you love me anymore?” Washu asked, tears forming in her eyes.
“… You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” Nabiki asked blandly.
“Exceedingly so,” mused Washu, tears gone, and a smile on her face. “Besides, I couldn’t do that to Ranma; he’s trying to figure something out with your little sister. Doing that with him would have either blown her mind or her gasket, whichever was weaker.”
Nabiki sighed, conceding the point. Such an event would have been an open invitation for Akane to lash out. And if Little Sister was to have an honest chance at Ranma’s heart, it would be best to smooth the road as much as possible.
Only Fate knew it was going to be hard enough dealing with the fathers and their attempts at a fast nuptial. She was just surprised they had waited this long, but that was likely due to Nodoka. That won’t last long.
“Should I expect more ‘released pent up lust’ coming my direction now?” Nabiki asked honestly.
“You mean, will I be jumping you like that in front of family and friends from now on?”
“Yes.”
“It is a good possibility,” Washu replied as innocently as she could. It was so much fun to wind Nabiki up like that. Can’t believe I forgot about doing this before…
Nabiki collapsed into her desk chair. “Nothing will stop you, will it? I remember your tenacity all too well,” she murmured, rubbing her temples, trying to ward off a headache. She knew some people already called her a lesbian behind her back in school—usually the guys she either turned down, dumped after breaking their bank accounts, or people who owed her money.
Hell, she was certain a few people in the business world on Earth and the Milky Way referred to her in the same terms and probably for the same reasons.
And if she was to be honest with herself, had a female with enough money come along during her time as Nabiki Tendo and made a similar query for a date like the boys had, she probably would have gone through with it.
I might now. Knowing Little Sister, she’s either blurted it out to the others downstairs or is calling her friends to discuss it. Already, her mind as well as PI was running through possible scenarios and ways to spin it. As she paused a moment, a single all-important question entered her head.
Slowly turning, she spotted her answer without having to utter a word.
Washu was standing before the large mirror in the room, holding a Furinkan High School uniform against her front.
Ranma stared at the roof of the Dojo, eyes wide, from where he had slipped in his kata and crashed to the floor. Something had just set Nabiki off, and not a minor issue, something so major, it overwhelmed the blocks he had placed to keep their mental queries and processes from ‘leaking’ into the other via their connections to PI. “Now I know I’m truly home,” he muttered, “because I know something’s about to hit the fan.”
Omake by Anime_Freak317:
“That sounds like it’s some sort of decoder ring they have in the cereals,” muttered Sakura curiously. She blushed immediately, thinking that she may have offended the visitors.
Minaho worked hard to suppress her desire to start laughing. The pinkette had no idea how correct she was.
With a small click, Tsunade connected the two items, causing them to begin to glow green.
“You’ll never take down Sgt. Floaty or my Brigade, Master Disaster!”
Those of Edo could only blink in shock of the voice coming out of the ring, the image of some kind of … fish/bird hybrid formed in the light above the token, speaking somehow in their language, wearing an odd military uniform.
Biting back the laughter, Lady Aratakira remembered what was on the other decoder rings to two particular countries. The Sound and Sand. She didn't know how, but Ranma Jr. managed to sneek in and change what was played just before giving them out. When they were first played, she was speechless.
But it was too late to change them now. She just had to go with the flow...and not laugh whenever she saw a ghople turning over like a stuck pig over an open flame while 'Chibi-Commander Ranma' said, "Yummy yummy yummy, soon I'll have ghople in my tummy."
Or worse yet, 'Chibi-Commander Ranma' and 'Master Disaster' throwing kunai at Sgt. Floaty's brigade as they rotated around like the duck shooting games at the fair. Then smirking to one another saying, "Too eazy."
Maybe that was why the Sand and Sound were so anal.
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