What the Chuck?

Summary: See chapter one.

Disclaimer: See chapter one.

Warnings: See chapter one.

"I spy with my little eye, something… round."

Green eyes narrowed in deep concentration, a small vein throbbing on his forehead from the effort, Fayt focused all of his available brain power on solving the riddle. Gradually, his breathing became more laboured and sweat began to pour in rivers down his cheeks.

Round… round… what could be round?

Cliff watched the openly distressed bluenette with barely contained amusement. He leaned across to Mirage, who was indulging a bored Maria by letting her paint her nails bright blue. "I love this part," he whispered gleefully.

Nel looked up from where she was tormenting Sophia with a chocolate muffin. "What part?" she asked, flicking another chunk of chocolaty goodness into her mouth.

"The part where he passes out."

Ignoring the dark glares from the livid brunette, Nel continued to eat her muffin with slow, torturous bites. "Why would he pass out from I Spy?"

The blonde Klausian smirked and settled back to enjoy the show. "You'll see."

She frowned but stared at Fayt anyway. Interesting…

The bluenette was sitting frozen in his chair, eyes wide as they swivelled slowly around the room. Every now and then he would give a small hiccup and Nel could not help but notice that his face was slowly but surely becoming the same shade of blue as his hair.

Nel was not alarmed. Or worried. She took a bite from her muffin instead.

I will not lose… I will not lose…. I will not lose again…

But what could be round?

Fayt was getting just a little bit anxious. Was thinking supposed to hurt this much? But the determined bluenette gathered his resolve, ignoring the agonising pain. He refused to lose to Cliff for the five hundred and ninety fifth time!

If only he could… concentrate on something… round…

There was silence as everyone stared at the floor. For about a second. Then Maria and Mirage went back to painting each others nails and Cliff picked up the Playboy he had been 'reading' earlier.

"Happens every time," he murmured in quiet satisfaction.

Nel however, continued to stare at the fallen bluenette.

"What just happened?" she asked randomly. And since it was a random question, no one bothered to answer. Except Sophia, who was eager to point out that the spy was not as clever as she thought.

"Isn't it obvious?"

Nel rolled her eyes, but took the bait nonetheless. "Fine then. Dazzle my poor underdeveloped mind with your supreme otherworldly knowledge, Sophia."

The brunette smiled. "No." And then cackled madly.

Nel cracked her knuckles, resisting the urge to kill. After all, Farleen was still alive and that said a lot for her self control.

"If you really want to know," Maria said absentmindedly, concentrating her efforts on wielding the small brush, "Fayt forgot to breath."

"What? How could he forget to BREATHE?"

"Quite easily actually. He does it all the time."

"How is it possible that someone as intelligent as Fayt could forget to breathe?"

Maria shrugged and started painting her nails orange.

Sophia cackled again, proving that she did indeed need the straightjacket.

Cliff was staring/drooling at pictures of Nel dressed in outfits so saucy they would make a stripper blush.

There was silence.

"Mirage, explain to me how Fayt can forget to breathe!"

The female Klausian looked up from her blue nails with absolutely no expression on her face. "Yes, Fayt is intelligent. Unfortunately he has the concentration span of a limp noodle."

"A limp noodle? What does a noodle have to do with Fayt forgetting to breathe?"

"Noodles are incapable of concentration."

"…"

"…"

"Okay, so why does Fayt forget to breathe?"

Mirage stared at Nel. Nel stared back.

"Because he has the concentration span of a limp noodle."

"…"

"…"

"… Are you doing this on purpose?"

Mirage frowned. "No. Fayt does have the concentration span of a cooked noodle. That is why he has to concentrate harder than everyone else. To concentrate on a game such as I Spy, Fayt needs an incredible amount of brainpower and his brain simply cannot supply him with that energy without making a few sacrifices. In order to concentrate at the required level, his brain loses its ability to control breathing. And that is why he is lying on the floor. He forgot to breathe by himself."

Nel was silent for a few moments before speaking. "That is impossible."

"You just saw it happen. He turned blue from lack of oxygen and fell over."

"…"

"…"

"So, do you normally just leave him on the floor?" Nel asked reluctantly, being forced to accept that Fayt had a brain that was more screwed up than Luther had let on.

"No. Sometimes we are in the mood to be nice and when that happens we put him on the couch. But that hasn't happened yet either."

As if to prove that point, the group continued to ignore poor Fayt.

Nel sighed. They always left her to clean up the trash… but she dragged herself up and made her way over to the bluenette. Cliff was the only one who watched her with interest, mainly because he was wondering if she was really as flexible as she was in the picture.

But before she could reach him, the door slid open with an ominous hiss and jingling of bells.

"Peppita?"

At the sound of her name, the young teens eyes filled with fresh tears. "Bel ran away!" she wailed, throwing herself down on the floor next to Fayt.

"What do you mean;ran away?" Cliff demanded, tucking his magazine securely under the table. The last thing he wanted was to be accused of corrupting young and impressionable minds again.

"Bel is gone!"

"How could Albel be gone? This is a spaceship, there are only so many places he could be!"

"Bel hates me!" she continued to wail, beating her small fists on the carpet.

"Of course he does."

Peppita stopped crying long enough to glare hatefully at Sophia, who only smiled back sweetly.

"Wait…" Nel stopped her pacing to stare suspiciously at her. "Peppita, what exactly did you do to make Albel run away from you?"

The pink haired girl narrowed her eyes shiftily, looking guilty as hell, but still unbelievably cute. "I just wanted a little bitty kiss," she murmured guiltily, playing with the bells on her sleeves.

There was a collective sigh.

"Oh well." Cliff settled back into his chair and flipped open his magazine.

Maria imitated the gesture and began painting red smiley faces on her orange nails, while Mirage started painting her toenails pink.

Nel watched them with an expression of disbelief on her face. "What are you all doing?"

"Waiting for Albel to get here."

She glared at Cliff. "You could at least go look for him so we can stop wasting time doing nothing," she spat. "This meeting should have been over hours ago!"

"Really?" he sat up, looking alarmed. "HOURS ago?"

"Yes!"

The blonde flopped back down in his seat. "Then go look for him yourself."

"…"

He looked up curiously to see Nel cracking her knuckles with a murderous expression on her lovely face. "Did I say something wrong?" he asked innocently.

Seeing that her partner was about get the stuffing knocked out of him, Mirage sighed and kindly volunteered to look for Albel. Taking care not to smudge the meticulously applied pink polish, she tiptoed out of the room and vanished around a corner.

After five minutes of crying her eyes out and throwing herself around, Peppita realized that no one was paying attention to her. She pouted and turned her attention to the prone figure lying next to her with a sigh. Fayt must have forgotten to breathe again, she thought knowingly. Leaning her head on her forearms, she stared directly into his face and began to blow gently.

"Wake up sleepyhead…" she crooned.

Eyelids fluttered before blinking shut. "Uhh?" he managed a small moan before passing out again.

Poor Fayt, she thought sympathetically. His brain is so tired… it must have been I Spy. But Peppita knew how to wake him up and she giggled in anticipation, lowering her lips to his face.

Then she slapped him on the head. "FAYT, WAKE UP!" she screeched in his ear.

"Owchie!"

Fayt shot upright, his body going rigid. "Must… not lose…" he gasped, flinging his arms wildly around him. "Must find… round…"

"Fayt, are you alright?"

The bluenette gaped at Nel for a few moments, his eyes fixed on her. Slowly, he brought his arm up until it was pointing directly at her head.

"Uh… Fayt?"

"Round… round head…" he whispered softly in amazed wonder.

Cliff glanced up, brow raised in surprise. Maria glanced at the blonde before looking back at Fayt. "It looks as though you may actually have won, Fayt. Congratulations."

"I… won?" he looked very confused.

"Wait, the round object was my HEAD?"

Fayt was stunned and he stood frozen as Nel began to chase Cliff around the room. "I won…" he repeated softly to himself. "I finally won a game of I Spy…"

"YES! MY LIFE FINALLY HAS MEANING!"

Meanwhile…

Oh. My. God.

Mirage stood and stared. There was really nothing she could do except stare at the amazing spectacle unfolding before her. Really, this was the last thing she had expected when she found Albel.

The swordsman was squatting on the table, one hand on his hip and the other curled in the air like he was trying to imitate a bird and he was singing.

Albel Nox, proud and arrogant to the bone, was pretending to be a teapot.

Slowly she walked towards him, keeping her distance in case it was contagious. Amusing as it was to see Albel reduce himself to a fool, she would hate to be in the same position. But Mirage stood in front of the oblivious swordsman and swore she would help him no matter what. It was her duty as his comrade and friend.

Then she pulled out her video camera and started filming.

"I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I see the tea cups, hear me shout: tip me over and pour me out!"

In that moment, Mirage knew she was going to make Cliff the happiest man in the galaxy. Of course, that would mean Albel would be harassed and mocked for the rest of his natural life but she was prepared to make that sacrifice.

Ah yes, the joys of friendship…

"Would you like some tea?"

Mirage blinked and almost dropped her video camera. "What?"

Albel looked at her patiently and stabbed his 'spout' toward a teacup on the table. "Would you like some tea?" he repeated. "You better have one quick before I get cold. Luckily for you, I am still fresh and hot."

Now at a loss for words, she only stared at him and thanked the gods above that she was still filming. "Why yes, I would love a cup of tea."

He beamed and tipped himself to the side, pouring imaginary tea from his arm into the waiting cup. "There you go, a nice hot cup of tea!"

Mirage gave him a bemused smile. "Uh… thanks." But she stared at the empty cup and then at Albel, who beamed again.

Did he honestly expect her to drink from an empty cup?

Crimson eyes narrowed and the smile disappeared. "Drink the tea."

Apparently so.

Okay, now he was starting to freak her out. "Albel, the others are waiting for us so I think we should be getting back -"

"NOW!"

"Or what?"

It was his turn to look confused. "Drink the tea… please?"

Mirage sighed. Really, this was starting to get on her nerves. And irritated Klausians were not a pretty sight. "Albel, I'm taking you back to Cliff and the others. Then we can figure out what happened to you and fix it."

He did not budge. "Will they want tea?" he asked, his eyes shining hopefully.

She hooked her arm through his handle and sighed again. "Do you have mint?"

"No, but I can always brew myself again."

"…Then I suppose they will be wanting tea. Now will you please get off the table?"

"Okay… but be careful not to drop me, I'm very fragile."

As she led him out of the room, Mirage could have sworn she saw a flash of what looked like a brown tail whip around the corner. Odd…

Had Roger been spying on them?

To be continued.