A/N: Who knows how I came up with this, but it’s been inside my head all day. Just as a note for all that have seen High Fidelity Part 1: let’s pretend in this that Paige and Spinner never had that rebound sex. I think it’s much better for one’s health if we just pretended they didn’t anyway; eyelids don’t twitch. The titles of the chapters come from lyrics of the song Shallow by Porcupine Tree; although the last one comes from another one of their songs, Trains.

Did Something In My Past Create A Hole?

I let the thought of her fill my head until the only thing I could do was squeeze my eyes shut and bury my head into my lap from where I sat on the windowsill. Many a time I’d pushed away her silken hand from my arm. I wouldn’t make eye contact with her even though those innocent puppy dog orbs would burn a hole straight through me. She would trail her fingers up my shoulder slowly, aware that she was creating goose bumps with her touch and taking pride in the fact. The side of her thumb would come to rest on my cheek and I’d flinch, still unable to meet her eye.

“Alex…I’m not going to bite.”

I’d roll my eyes in what she called my signature way and move so that she could sit down next to me.

“Do you miss her?” She’d ask in her soft, sweet little voice. Why did she even bother asking that question?

Still, I’d nod my head glumly, finding more interest in my own shoes than in her eyes.

“Maybe you should go see her…”

“Ellie just shut the hell up and kiss me.”

She did. Of course it would escalate into something more; it always did.