Title: Unbreakable
Rating: M Warnings: Angst, allusions to abuse
Spoilers: Speculation based on season 3 spoilers.
Pairing/s: Lee/Dee, Bill, Kara, Sam, Kara/Lee.
Disclaimers: I don't own them wish I did
Summary: For a man who’d never had much faith, he’d needed it to survive these last ten months. Though it wasn’t faith in the gods that kept him going.

Unbreakable -

Lee pounded the punching bag, the ache in his arms making him feel alive, healthy, real. They would be back in New Caprica’s orbit in less than forty eight hours. It was about frakking time. The preparations they’d had to go through to be any sort of opponent to the Cylons had been tedious, arduous, but completely necessary.

Well that’s what he told himself with each pound of his fist. Because mentally he knew that ten months was too frakking long. Gods only knew how many people had died while waiting to be rescued. He wondered if any of them still held faith that Galactica and Pegasus were actually coming back.

Her voice filled the gym with warmth. “Don’t use up all of your strength,” She teased.

Lee stepped back, barely missing the sway of the bag. Ana walked in and unzipped her sweat shirt. Her smouldering eyes heating his blood. With a nod, she invited him over to the practice mat.

He knew she was trying to take his mind off the mission, so he allowed it to work as best he could.

They danced around each other, him attacking, her defending. The glint of her wedding band often catching his eye. A feral grin spread across her features as she became assured of her triumph, but Lee dodged and twisted catching her out. She was going to land hard on an awkward angle so Lee yanked her arm back and took the fall, his wife landing neatly on top of him.

They were nose to nose and out of breath. “Hi there.” She smiled and leaned down to kiss him.

Lee lost himself in the warmth of her mouth for a brief moment, but they weren’t alone so he gently pushed her back. “Maybe we need to take a shower,” He suggested with a smirk.

Ana still didn’t move, she just stared into his eyes and smiled. “Isn’t this where we started?”

Lee’s mind flashed back to their first heated spark, but it shied away as he remembered her bouncing off to Billy. “Yeah, this is where it started.” He gave her one more quick kiss and rolled her off.

Lee got to his feet and held out his hand, she took it and kept hold, leading him out of the gym back to their private quarters, private shower.

He teased her that she was more insatiable since he lost the weight; she smacked his arm, keeping her fingers pressed into the hard muscle and completely denied it.

Half an hour of oblivion seemed good. He knew he would feel the guilt later, but he wasn’t as self-loathing as he used to be. Not everything was his fault. Decisions had to be made and his father had assured him on countless occasions that there were survivors and that the colonists were in good hands.

Lee needed to believe in that, more so than his father; it was the only thing that kept him going, kept him from self destructing.

Later as they lay in bed, sated and relaxed, Ana curled up into his side and drew patterns across his chest. “You’re thinking about her again, aren’t you?”

Her voice wasn’t accusing, they had thankfully stopped fighting about that over six months ago.

“Not at all.” Lee knew it was semantics. You had to stop before you could do something again. But time was drawing near and it was only natural for him and his father to be thinking about their other family member, the only person who had the best chance of keeping as many people alive down there as possible.

Lee was only doing his job.

“You know her husband won’t let anything happen to her.” Ana was trying to be comforting, but Lee couldn’t help but notice that she always made a point of mentioning her marital status.

It wasn’t something Lee was ever likely to forget.

He used it like a crutch. The knowledge that he, her man, her choice, would be backing her up and that he wasn’t a green warrior was what allowed Lee to close his eyes at night. Hold his wife and actually rest.

“I know that honey.” He tightened his arm around her. “She’s a warrior to the core……” He hesitated. “It’s just I…we feel responsible for her, you know, because of my brother.”

Ana nuzzled in over his old bullet wound.

“She’s the sister I never almost had.” He stated simply.

“Family.” Ana agreed.

Lee nodded his head and kissed her hair. “Exactly; family.”

0000000000

The tension in the air was palpable. This was the last visit Lee would be making to the Galactica before the final jump.

“Dad, do you really think……”

“There is no doubt in my mind.” Bill stated with pure confidence. “She’s had the most experience with the Cylons than anybody. She’s interrogated Leoben, escaped from one of their farms, knows how to operate their equipment.”

Lee nodded. He knew all of this, he knew it. During the tactical planning he had gone over all her files repeatedly. The amount of Cylons she’d been in contact with was impressive.

Lee took a sip of his father’s private stash. “I just hope it’s enough.”

The way his father’s eyes widened in surprise made Lee realise he’d given away too much. He’d always been so careful to keep his confidence up.

“She knows we’d never leave her there, son,” His father’s blue eyes boring into him. “Kara’s holding on until we get there; count on it.”

Hearing her name spoken out loud jolted him, made his heart pound a little. Thankfully he was a master at locking down his emotions. The trust he had in his father was strong, almost as strong as the trust he had in her. It was just that small nagging kernel of doubt that refused to leave him. He’d been separated from her for too long. He wasn’t sure what would be the implications or what they would mean.

For a man who’d never had much faith, he’d needed it to survive these last ten months. Though it wasn’t faith in the gods that kept him going.

0000000000

The battle was ugly, brutal; their losses were staggering. Sacrificing the Pegasus had been hard but necessary. During all the crazy commotion, he’d only had word that Kara was still alive, but there had been no time to really process it.

The information had been received, stored, had done its job in allowing him to carry on and now over two days had passed. Lee finally took a few minutes to let it sink in. She was safe, so was her husband, so were most of the people that Lee had come to care about. He knew his father was more pleased than himself that Roslin had survived.

People were being shuttled aboard Galactica every few hours. It was an odd feeling. The joy and relief was there, but people were exhausted and tired and the air had become subdued.

Searching out his old bunk, Lee decided to get some much needed sleep. Ana found him a few hours later; she crawled over him and whispered in his ear that this was like old times. Lee barely grunted but took advantage of her body as a softer pillow than what his bunk provided. Her warm scent lulling him back to a dreamless sleep.

0000000000

“Commander Adama to the Admirals’s quarters……” The call went out twice before Lee became aware that he was being summoned over the loud speakers.

Ana groaned as he accidentally woke her. He kissed her mouth and told her to go back to sleep. Her eyes fluttered opened and she sat up. “No, I’ll come with you. I haven’t had time to see dad in days.”

“I’m sure he misses you.” Lee agreed as he started pulling on clothes. “Hurry up then.”

They arrived at his father’s quarters within ten minutes. It was late, but plenty of activity still filled the corridors. People were still streaming in from the planet at a steady rate.

Lee knocked and they entered when invited in. His father looked uneasy, his eyes immediately going to Ana. It sent a nervous stripe down Lee’s back.

“Sir, what’s wrong?” Lee stepped forward, demanding his father’s attention.

“I, I don’t think……” Bill looked at Lee with a pointed directness. “We should probably speak in private.”

Ana’s smile dropped from her face, disappointed. So Lee spoke up. “Is that necessary? What is it about?”

Bill took a breath. “Starbuck.”

The nervous stripe mutated into a cold fear.

Bill sensed Lee’s immediate conclusion and quickly put up his hand to allay his fears. “She’s alive, it’s not that.”

Relaxing somewhat, Lee got control of himself. “Ana should stay.” Not wanting to elaborate as to why, Lee just hoped his father would realise that not keeping anything from Ana where Starbuck was concerned would instantly make his life easier.

Bill nodded and gave Ana a warm affectionate smile. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to be……”

She cut him off. “It’s perfectly fine dad.” She then seated herself with her natural grace and looked expectantly from one man to the other.

The sudden quiet seemed awkward, but Bill checked his watch and pushed ahead. “Kara and Sam will be here in about twenty minutes.”

“That’s great, Lee said easily. Trying to ignore the thousand questions, the relief, the tension, the irrational thoughts.

His father looked strange and took off his glasses. Pinching the bridge of his nose, he sat behind his desk and finally said what needed to be said. “Something’s happened.”

Lee stood there locked into position. “Like what?” His voice low and determined.

“Kara’s been a prisoner of the Cylons.”

Lee let out a sharp sound. “They were all prisoners of the Cylons, dad.”

Bill shook his head. “No, Ka… Starbuck was a personal prisoner of the Cylons, or at least one Cylon.”

Lee flexed his fingers, as his skin crawled. “What did they do to her?”

Bill’s eyes flicked briefly to Ana again before he continued. “They apparently did mind experiments on her, made her think she was in love, happy… married.”

Lee looked confused. “But she was all those things.”

“No,” Lee could see his father struggle with words. “She’s had a baby, but it’s dead.”

His brain obviously wasn’t working properly, he couldn’t process the information. Kara and Sam had a baby and now it was gone – of course that would be devastating for the two of them. “I’m not sure I understand.”

“One of the Leoben models had Kara in confinement. He drugged her; brain washed her and impregnated her.” Bills words faded out.

Lee stood frozen completely paralysed. “The Cylons got there hands on her? Touched her?” Lee swallowed, “Raped her?”

There was a shocked gasp from Ana, but Lee was unable to break eye contact with the Old Man. There were tears in his eyes.

“Those bastards got our girl, Lee.” His father ground out low and dangerous. “They got our girl.”

The dead silence was interrupted by a knock at the hatch. Lee balled his fists and clenched his jaw. His father managed to call out, “Enter.”

Samuel T. Anders entered the room, an unrecognisable creature huddled in close behind him.

Lee lost control.

Before the first words could Leave Sam’s mouth, Lee had grabbed his collar and hauled him into the bulkhead near the hatch. “You frakking bastard.” Lee started shouting. Sam tried to pull him off, but Lee refused to let go. “You were supposed to look after her.” He yelled, slamming Sam’s body again into the wall. “You were supposed to keep her safe. I trusted you with her.”

An inhuman wail filled the room, sending bolts of ice through Lee’s blood. They all turned to Kara who had dropped to her knees and was rocking back and forth. Lee had no clue what the others in the room were doing; just the broken sight of Kara was all he could see. Her uneven hair hacked too close to her scalp in some places, the deep gouges up her arms and across her collar bone, the sunken skin of her cheeks. There was hardly anything left of her. Without warning she looked up and seemed to stare directly at him, her eyes looking far too big for her head. Lee could swear he saw a moment of recognition before the veil dropped and she started rocking and moaning again.

Sam pushed Lee away, and went to kneel beside her. She flinched and shied away. Sam turned back to Lee with an angry look. “See what you’ve done! It took me all day to convince her to trust me enough to follow me and get on a Raptor. Now she’s back to this again.” He motioned his hand at Kara’s rocking form.

Lee was no longer thinking, just working on pure instinct. And his instinct wanted Kara as far away from Sam Anders as was humanely possible. Lee had trusted Kara’s safety to the guy, making this ultimately Lee’s fault. So there was no way he was going to trust him with her again. Lee wanted to kill the mother frakker. Lee knew he would be dead before he let a Cylon touch one golden hair on her head. Yet Sam had allowed Kara to be with the Cylons long enough to have a frakking baby. Lee felt like he was going to lose it.

Lee gripped Sam’s shoulder and hauled him up. Ana shouted for Lee to stop, but that was impossible. Kara started becoming more erratic and he felt his father’s hand on his shoulder finally making Lee aware he was slowly chocking Sam with his forearm.

“Let go, son.” His father said with quiet calm.

He purposely pressed harder one last time before reluctantly letting go. “I should frakking kill you.” He whispered.

Ana came over stepping between him and Kara, blocking his path to her. “No Lee, it’s not your place. You need to let her husband be with her – not you.” She held out her arm, pressing his shoulder backwards.

Funnily enough, his father remained quiet; Lee immediately knew what that meant. Knocking Ana’s hand away, he stepped past her to crouch down near the broken creature still rocking and crying on the floor.

“Hush, hush Kara. You’re safe now.” He tried to smooth his hand over her head. Kara flinched and shied away. It was taking all of Lee’s strength not to start crying himself; it didn’t help that the shudders in his chest wouldn’t relent.

“It’s no use.” Sam croaked out from across the room. “That’s not Kara anymore. She’s been like this for nearly two weeks now.”

Lee turned an incredulous stare at Sam who was still rubbing his neck, slouched against the wall. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. How could Kara ever have chosen to marry a worthless shit like him?

“You just stay the frak away from her.” Lee warned; the tears now evident in his voice.

Turning back to Kara, Lee tried again to reach out to her. She keened long and loud, rocking more violently. As he looked at her helplessly, he realised she was murmuring under her breath. Lee stilled and her words sent a ripple of guilt shock-waving through his body, crashing against his heart. “Lee, Lee…” It had to be his guilty imagination, it was just noise she was making but the punisher in him formed the sounds into meaning.

Desperate now, he tried to touch her again; he needed to hold her more for himself than for her at that moment. “Kara, it’s me. I’m here.” He pleaded.

She continued to ignore him.

Lee took a risk and grabbed her shoulders, twisting her to look at him; she snarled and shoved, her fingernails drawing up blood on his forearm. He hissed in pain, but refused to let go. “Kara, you know me. Please come back to me.” Shaking her slightly.

Kara stopped in mid lunge, her eyes huge and seeing. Lee saw the veil lift again and recognition hit. The completely silent air was suddenly filled with the most desperate sound. The agonising sob Kara let out hit everyone in the room. It was the most pain filled sound he’d ever heard. “Lee.” She rasped out and flung herself at him shaking violently.

That was it for Lee. There was no more turning back. The need to protect Kara was too strong. He gathered her up to her feet and held her. Her shaking masking his.

Looking up, Lee turned slightly and realised every pair of eyes were on them. It was irrational but Lee even felt the need to protect her from their stares, from Ana who had no right to look at Kara, from Sam who no longer had the right, and even to his father. His dad would never hurt Kara, but right now, Lee just wasn’t willing to take the risk.

Lee slowly walked backwards bringing Kara along to his father’s sleeping area. He slipped them past the door and shut it, not caring what any of them thought. Kara had soaked the corner of his uniform jacket so he somehow managed to peel it off without losing contact with her.

They laid down on the bed and Lee just held her now softly weeping form. Giving her all the strength he possessed and comfort he could offer, he gathered her close in the protection of his arms. It was nearly an hour before she drifted off to sleep, though her fists remained bunched in his tanks.

The shaking inside his body had finally calmed to a manageable level. But his mind kept shying away from thinking about exactly what she must’ve gone through. The frustration of not being able to render immediate retribution was maddening.

Kara whimpered in her sleep, instinctively clutching at him. Lee hushed her with whispered words into her short hair and the odd kiss. He felt and heard her breathe deep at his neck and she soon settled. Exhaustion suddenly took its toll, so Lee shifted to a more comfortable position, Kara meshed perfectly against him and finally they both slept.

0000000000

Bill had sent Sam off and the man had gone without too much protest. But did say he would come back in the morning. Ana was his real problem.

“This is completely unacceptable.” She threw up her hands. “My husband in not sleeping in there with her.”

Bill understood the fear that was driving Ana’s words. It wasn’t a lack of sympathy for Kara, just a complete terror that she had just lost her husband. That one single look on Lee’s face had told everybody the truth, and that it was already too late. Lee was gone.

Bill corrected himself. No, Lee had been gone for a long while – he was finally back.

“I’m sorry, Ana. But there is nothing you can do tonight. You just need to give Lee a chance to come to terms with what’s happened to Kara.” That seemed about the best advice he could offer.

Ana pleaded with her eyes for him to do better, to do something now. Bill just shook his head and nudged her towards the hatch.

“It’s late; you should try to get some sleep.”

“How can I?” She pressed.

Bill had no more words of comfort. “Sam’s coming back in the morning, so I‘ll see you then too.” The hurt was clear in her eyes, but she finally stepped over the threshold.

Bill grabbed an old blanket and tried to get comfortable on his couch. His mind raced from one problem to the next. But it was hard to concentrate on anything but his abused and broken daughter in the next room.

A muffled sob filtered through followed by soft deeper murmurs of comfort.

He didn’t want to pass judgement. Things were never cut and dry, especially between those two. But what seemed simple choices tonight would expound into coiled traps by the morning. His family had grown of late and Sam and Ana would be back to exert their rights in the morning.

Bill got up and made a phone call.

“Sir?” The comms officer queried.

“What’s one of the quieter ships we still have left?”

There was a momentary pause. “I guess that would be the Embower, Sir”

“Get me the Captain…...”

Bill let his kids have three more hours sleep before he woke them. It wasn’t a perfect solution, but it would do for now.

fin