Disclaimer: Alas.

Moi Musings: I just had to add this. The doting father who doesn't know a single thing about his daughter. This was fun to write. Bwahahahaha.

Who should I bully next?

(Watch out for Zaraki's foul mouth.)

“Yachiru! You’re bleeding!”

“I know that, Ken-chan! Now get out!”

“But Yachiru-”

“I said go away, Ken-chan!”

“But you’re bleeding, damnit!”

“I know! Now go away!”

“I’ll get one of those Fourth Squad punks here, right now! They’ll get you treated!”

“NO! I’ve seen Unohana-taichou about this already and she-”

“Didn’t she heal you or anything? Why, that granny…”

“Ken-chan!”

“How on Earth did you get hurt anyway? Which bastard hurt you, huh? Was it that damn Kurotsuchi? That asshole, always hitting little girls…”

“I’m not a little girl anymore, Ken-chan!”

“Whatever. So who was it? The squirt Hitsugaya?”

“No, it’s not any…”

“It’s that Kuchiki then! Ooh, that little…”

“Ken-chan!”

“I’ll beat him up! He’ll wish he were dead!”

“It’s not him either, Ken-chan! It’s-”

“What? Not Kuchiki? Damn, I had such a good excuse to whack him, too…”

“Ken-chan! Will you listen for just…”

“Ah hah! It’s not that Ukitake, is it? He must have spread something to you! Why, I’ll go put that little sissy cougher out of his misery right…”

“GAH! I HATE YOU, STUPID KEN-CHAN! OUT!”

There was a loud crash, and the door to the bathroom slammed shut with an ear-splitting bang. The windows shook a little from the impact. Kenpachi sat in the wreckage of the once-wall, trying to decide if he ought to be proud of his (not-so-little-anymore) lieutenant’s strength or worry about the teenager’s wounds.

Wounds.

“Ara, ara. Fukutaichou’s all grown up now, isn’t she?”

“Yumi! Perfect timing. Yachiru’s bleeding but she doesn’t want to tell me who hurt her. Go get her out.”

“Uh, I don’t think that now’s a good time to disturb fukutaichou, Taichou.”

“Hmm, you’ve got a point. She’s been pretty cranky lately. Do you think it’s because of her injury?”

Yumichika sighed. This was going to be difficult.

“Taichou, about this process called ‘menstruation’…”

And Yumi saves the day!

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