Recap: "Commodore! What about Sparrow?" Gillette asked.

"Well, I think we can afford to give him one day's head start," Norrington replied, smirking...

"I'm 'avin' a thought," Jack Sparrow said suddenly, sitting with his arm around Anamaria, a pint of rum, and his feet on the table below deck on the Black Pearl, which was drifting peacefully over the sparkling blue waters of the Caribbean. Across from him was Joshamee Gibbs, Marty (on a stack of books), Cotton, Cotton's parrot, and a few other members of the crew. "What say we..." He was cut off by a large bang, which sent the parrot flying and nearly knocked Marty off his chair.

"Shiver me timbers!" Cotton's parrot squawked, most likely translating to, "What was that?"

Jack sighed. "I hoped I wouldn't hear those cannons again," he said exasperatedly. "Well, come on ye bloody scalawags! Run out the sweeps!"

"What's goin' on?" Gibbs asked.

"It's the bloody Dauntless! Now MOVE!"

Jack clambered up to the deck and got out his telescope. Sure enough, there stood Commodore Norrington looking rather pleased with himself as the gravity-defying curls on his powder-white wig shone bright in the sun.

Jack, having a superior crew, was quite content to sit on his hind end and watch them do the dirty work, but thought better of it and hurried to man a cannon as Crimp raised the Jolly Roger and Duncan climbed up to the crow's nest to make sure the Dauntless was the only attacker. Sure enough it was the Dauntless alone, packed to maximum capacity with able-bodied British men who somehow had no tan whatsoever, despite living in the Caribbean.

Jack fired a cannon, which was sent hurtling through the air to take out several of Norrington's men. "Drink up me hearties yo HO!" he shouted, extremely pleased with himself for that. Of course, now the men on the Dauntless were quite angry about Jack's little cannon bursting a giant hole in their ship, and quickly returned fire. By the time Jack realized this, it was nearly too late and the cannonball was so close to his head the wind created blew his hat off. Jack spent quite a long time trying to find it amongst the debris (a pirate is not a pirate without his hat), since the cannonball had shattered the beam behind him.

Unfortunately, he didn't find his hat, but left, hearing another member of his crew calling him, sounding rather frantic. "Bloody pirates, can't hold their own..." he muttered.

Rather annoyed with their apparent incapability, Jack sauntered over to where they were calling him. "Oh dear," he whispered...