III

Clow was beginning to doze off, after all, in spite of all his efforts. He was about to fall asleep completely when a deep rumble startled him. He jumped up, suddenly awake by sheer necessity – the whole ground was cracking. The sand started to slip away beneath his feet, dragging him down with it.

There was no choice this time. Keeping Windy at hand just in case, he called for Fly and hoped for the best.

Slowly, the desert was turning into a neverending plain of bare rock. The dunes disappeared as the sand that formed them fell down the deep cracks. Clow realized with some disappointment that there still wasn't anywhere else to go. He simply kept himself at a safe distance above the ground; not very high, however, since that was too much of a risk.

It turned out that the precautions were necessary. Fly stopped working all of a sudden, with no warning signs whatsoever. But he had been expecting it and managed to use Windy just on time. He floated down slowly, until he was almost on the ground again. Then he made a grave mistake: he thought he was safe.

The Card failed and dropped him. It was no worse than falling off a chair, but the ground he landed on was stone. He sat up with his glasses askew, rubbing his aching shoulder.

"Now, that was just mean-spirited!" he snapped, with the absolute certainty that Q was listening.

He was right, indeed. It started raining.

o O o

The next time that Q appeared at Yuuko's house, he found her a lot calmer, lounging on her couch and sipping sake as if nothing unusual was going on. She was still convinced that there was no reason to be worried, even after getting bad news about Clow's situation again.

"I don't really like this," the alien said when he finished telling her what had happened now. "He's getting too many ideas."

"Do you think he has a chance, then?" she asked. Q leaned closer and answered in a conspiratorial whisper.

"Actually, he's going completely in the wrong direction."

Yuuko wasn't upset by his answer. She put an arm around his shoulders, grinning.

"Are we still friends?"

"You know," he laughed, "just for your boldness, I think I'll give you what you're going to ask for."

"Don't be too mean to him when you bring him back," she said. Q raised his eyebrows.

"If I bring him back," he corrected.

"Yes, yes," Yuuko replied, ignoring him. "And don't tell him I said that."

"Oh, I'll have to think about that part."

o O o

Clow's first reaction to the change in the weather was to use Shield around him again, cross his arms over his knees, and sulk. It was unbecoming to him, he knew that. He hadn't acted like that since he was a moody teenager with too much power in his hands. But he didn't care. There was no one to see him, and the Cards wouldn't tell.

It was still night and, between that and the constant rain, everything was pitch black around him. Glow wasn't much use; he could barely see himself, even with the bright spheres floating nearby. However, it was the best he could do. Light required too much power, and then he would have to use Dark too. The mere thought made him feel exhausted.

When the sun finally came out, he realized that he couldn't just sit around, as much as he would have liked to. The water, that had been falling down the cracks on the ground so far, seemed to be pooling around him. Its level was rising quickly – very quickly. He activated Fly again and tried to keep himself a little above the surface. In a few minutes, there was a whole sea where only a while earlier there had been a desert, and it was deep enough to cover a man.

Or worse, Clow corrected himself, suddenly discovering the dark shape that was moving right below him. It was deep enough to cover a monster. He shot upwards, but it was too late – the creature had jumped, and pushed him down into the water. With a presence of mind he didn't expect to have anymore, he used Watery to create a bubble around him; but the greatest problem remained. Now he could look at the monster that attacked him: it was a giant reptile, a dragon-like being from the times before men lived on the earth. And it was still focused on him.

He glanced at the surface, trying to calculate the distance. Using Sword meant he had to break the bubble, but if he could make it up there –

The plan was pointless. To his horror, Watery returned to its Card form, barely giving him time to take a breath. The monster launched itself on him, pushing him deeper, deeper... He didn't waste energy on Sword. He needed to focus on something greater. It was difficult, but at last he felt it, after what seemed ages; his magic was working, moving the ground beneath him.

A pillar of rock shot up, pushing the creature aside on its way. Clow managed to get a grip on a salient, and Earthy led him up to the surface. For a while, he simply lay there, gasping, without even bothering to take his hair off his eyes. This time it had been too close for his liking. Things were getting really serious now. He took his hand to his face, reaching for his glasses.

They weren't there.

He groaned, tired. They had to be floating around somewhere... Suddenly, a horrible thought overcame him, and he took his hand to his neck – then he sighed in relief. He still had his Key, at least. It gave him a little hope, so he decided to give it a try and look for the lost spectacles.

"Watery, please," he said hoarsely. Nothing happened. "Please..."

He was about to give up when the sprite did appear, after all. She looked as weak as he felt, and he almost called her back, but she had already jumped into the sea. Clow sat up slowly, squinting as he tried to look around. All he could make out around him was water.

No, he realized, not quite. There was a dark, blurry shape coming nearer and nearer. He didn't need to see it properly to tell what it was. He didn't waste any time in plans or calculations. With one last effort, he did the only thing that he could think of.

"Thunder!"

It took him all the strength he had left, but it worked. The creature was still smoking when it sunk, just as the Card returned to him. Clow stumbled and fell backwards, slipping, feeling too heavy to even move. Earthy created a small elevation at his feet, catching him just on time.

"Thank you," he whispered. Watery came back, bringing his glasses with her. He smiled at her a little.

Then it started raining again. His smile disappeared, along with every trace of hope that had remained in him so far. He covered his face with his hands, groaning. He wasn't afraid, or even sad; he was just angry. The whole thing made him furious. He was cold, and wet, and tired, and he hadn't slept in ages. And he was completely at the mercy of an insane trickster.

It was enough to make even him explode.

"All right, that's it!" he shouted. "I can't deal with this anymore. It's too much! I am not powerful enough! Is that what you want to hear?"

"In fact," said Q, "yes."

Clow lowered his arms and opened his eyes. He was standing in his living room again, as if nothing had happened – well, not quite. Q was sitting on his chair. After a few moments of disbelief, during which he still had the horrible feeling that this was just another mad joke, the wizard realized that it was, indeed, over.

"That was it?" he asked slowly, trying not to let his anger show too much. "You put me through all of that madness just so I would say that?"

"Of course not. You could have said it any moment," Q replied. He was playing around with a Magic 8-Ball, and for some reason his carelessness with it made Clow wince. "I put you through that so that you would mean it."

"Why, how thoughtful of you," said Clow dryly. "I want my Guardians back."

"Hey, what's with the hurry?" said Q, pretending to look hurt. "I'm going to think you don't trust me."

He was about to reply, but he felt a new weight in one of his pockets as soon as the alien stopped speaking. He reached inside and there they were, both of them still sealed – and, more importantly, still safe. They were sleeping, so calm that he wondered if they had even noticed what had just happened. For a moment, he hesitated; then he decided that it would be better not to release them yet. Chances were that they would be angry, and he didn't want to risk that. He'd wait until Q left, but he didn't show any signs of wanting to do it anytime soon.

"Happy now?"

"Not really," Clow muttered. Q leaned back on the chair, giving him a meaningful look.

"Oh, come on," he told him. "You can't get so upset over a little game."

"You cheated!" the wizard exclaimed, and he would have said a lot more if the sound of a bell hadn't interrupted him. He sighed, rubbing his temples. "All right, you have a point about that one. But I have a good reason for that. Unlike other people, I'm not doing it just for the fun of it."

"But you do like the fun of it," said Q. He took a small book out of nowhere; it had a pastel cover, with a picture of Sakura in a blue dress. "Look, it says so here. 'Hobby: surprising people'."

Clow blinked. This was getting far too surreal, and that was saying a lot considering how much his standards had changed during the last few hours.

"Indeed, my friend," the alien continued, "you and I do have some things in common. The difference is that you're working at a microscopical scale and I'm handling all the multiverse. You know what, I think I'll call you Mini-Me."

"I thought you said it was over," Clow said, gritting his teeth to prevent himself from yelling at him. "Do you really need to keep stabbing at my ego?"

"Please, I'm not that bad. Stop acting as if you'd just come out of a Total Perspective Vortex."

"Close enough, I think," he said, crossing his arms. "You're enjoying this far too much."

"And I can come up with a list of people who'd say the same about you," Q replied. "Just admit it. You like playing around with people."

"I told you, I have very good reasons -"

"That's beside the point," he said, waving his hand. "Ethics are so relative, anyway. But fun is always fun."

"Well," said Clow, with the beginning of a grin fighting to come out, "perhaps you aren't so wrong about that."

"Of course not. I'm never wrong," Q replied, as the wizard rolled his eyes at him. "It's your human limitations what makes it look that way."

"Really," Clow muttered.

"Really. But I can't stay to explain you the details of my superiority, I'm afraid. I have plans to meet an old friend now."

"Should I feel sorry for him?" he asked cheekily, raising an eyebrow. Q's smile was rather dangerous.

"Oh, I'm sure Jean-Luc does feel sorry for himself," he said. "Before I leave, though – I still have something else that's yours."

He threw the 8-Ball at Clow, who groaned as he caught it. It felt so terribly heavy... He twisted it around a little, grimacing at it. Then he looked up at Q.

"Isn't there a way...?"

"There are plenty of ways. But I'm sure your girlfriend would disapprove," he replied. "You'd probably regret it yourself in a while. Humans are strange like that, they feel weird when they get things for free. If there's something that amazes me about you people is that you really don't like gifts."

"Tell me about it," Clow sighed. Just at that moment, the ball started spinning on its hand. This was it, then; the last of his freedom. He braced himself for the wave of power – the tiny transparent window opened itself –

Then a ridiculous clown's head jumped up like a jack-in-the-box, sticking out its tongue at him. Clow dropped the ball, startled, and stepped back out of instinct. Not a second later, he felt awfully silly. He turned around to look at Q, who was having quite a laugh at his expense.

"What on earth was that?" he exclaimed, dangerously close to getting angry again. Q stopped laughing and grinned at him.

"A surprise, of course," he said. "But only because I like Yuuko so much."

With that, he disappeared. For a few moments, Clow stared at the now empty chair, blinking.

And then, even as his power did embrace him, he smiled.

The jungle that crumbles into a desert is a nod to Michael Ende's The Neverending story. A Total Perspective Vortex is a concept from Douglas Adams's Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series. And we all know Mini-Me from those silly Austin Powers movies...