Thanks to Emmithar for betareading!

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Tearing, Part 2

Sara told herself to breathe calmly while she was waiting in front of Grissom's office. She had missed being the first one in there tonight as she had hesitated too long back in the locker room so that Warrick had beat her to it. As far as she knew her co-worker was talking with their boss only about a simple work-related matter. The reason why she was pacing some steps up and down the hallway in front of the office was not work-related at all.

She had to tell him that it had to stop. That they could not make another silent agreement during shift to meet afterwards. She was more than ever bitterly regretting that they had started it at all. Only the realization that it would be even worse, far worse, if Greg ever found out, was what kept her from breaking her resolution, knowing that simply not reacting on Grissom's silent invitations anymore would not settle the matter.

Suddenly the door opened and Warrick walked into the hallway, watching amusedly how Sara turned on her heels again and paced back towards the office.

"Your turn," he said.

"Yeah," Sara took another deep breath and pushed the still open door wider open.

---

It had been an almost perfect day for Greg. Okay, he had had to work overtime but that was not anything extraordinary, nothing that would upset him in any way. He had still been able to catch some hours of sleep at home, at his and Sara's home that was, before they both had headed out. They had spent a great day out at Lake Mead, what had really been the right place to be in the heat, and in Greg's opinion it could not have been better.

Now he was in the lab again, looking for Sara. Warrick had given him the tip that he had seen her in Grissom's office and so Greg made his way down there good-humouredly with the intention to catch her when she was finished with whatever she and Grissom had to discuss. When he was approaching the door, he heard them talking, even catching a glimpse of them through the crack between the door and its frame.

In the very first moment he only wondered since when Grissom had become so approachable that he was now standing so close to Sara, finally even laying an arm around her waist. Then he comprehended the meaning of what they were talking about that had not made sense to him at all in the first second, and his stomach turned to ice. Greg watched how Sara shoved Grissom's arm aside.

"No, it's over," she said. Turning to go, she added, "We can't do this anymore. I don't want this anymore." She burst out of the room, giving Greg barely time to jump back from where he had been standing to avoid that she crashed into him. Sara's surprised expression met Greg's paled face, turning into fear then. A mixture of thoughts was running through Greg's head. He wanted to know everything… and nothing. Of all the possible comments and questions that came to his mind, an objective one made it to the front.

"How long has this been going on?" He and Sara had been dating for almost a year now, living together for a week. Greg did not even know if he really wanted to hear from her how she had been betraying him the whole time. Nevertheless he was asking her.

"About a month," Sara answered quietly, avoiding Greg's gaze, apparently realizing that there was no point in denying anything.

"Great," Greg laughed bitterly. "We moved in together a week ago, Sara. You could've said something that you'd like to move to Grissom's instead." He shook his head. "Call me. I'll gladly help you bringing your stuff over to his house. I've always been the helpful guy, you know." He turned on his heels, and marched away from her, stumbling into the locker room just some seconds later.

He pulled his locker open, having no intention to stay in the lab any longer that night. After he had brought out his bag, he slammed the locker shut again, kicking it once more, before he sank on the bench behind him, leaving his head hanging. When he heard quiet careful foot steps coming up, he did not need to turn his head towards the entrance to know that it was Sara. She did not say anything and he did not turn to her either.

"I thought we have something together," he said quietly. "When we moved in together, I thought it would be for a long while, maybe even forever."

Now she called his name softly, apparently still not daring to approach him.

"You destroyed it," Greg added simply, resignedly.

Sara came over now and crouched down in front of him. "I made a terrible mistake, Greg. I'm so sorry." Silence. "But it doesn't have to be over." There was a desperate undertone in Sara's voice that Greg could not miss it. He was shaking his head, but Sara did not know if he was agreeing with her that it did not need to be over, or out of disagreement. She laid her hand on his arm and he did not pull it away to her surprise and relief.

"I love you, Greg, and I thought you felt the same. And that's not gone because of… it's not gone, Greg."

Greg shot up, climbing, nearly falling, over to bench to get past Sara.

"You destroyed it," he repeated his earlier words. "With Grissom, on top of all."

Sara had risen as well, leaning now against the row of lockers behind her for support.

"After how he treated you…" Greg shook his head. "That's what I'd call self-destructing behavior." He approached her briefly again, but only to pick up his bag that he had laid next to the bench. "Just don't draw others in there with you," he told her finally, before turning to go. "I'll head home. Tell Grissom I took the night off." It did not matter to him right now, if the lab was busy or not, or if they needed him now or not. He did not need any of it this night.

"Greg, please stay."

Greg did not have the opportunity to accept or decline her plea, as Catherine was standing in the entrance suddenly. She looked briefly at the both of them, before coming down to business quickly.

"Greg, a 419 for you," she said, handing him a slip of paper. Greg took it and looked over it reluctantly, his plans on heading home quickly, preferably without anybody noticing, failed.

"That's far outside," he commented, reading the name of the tiny town. He contemplated telling Catherine no for a moment, but decided then that it would be the opportunity to get out of here for the whole night, considering how far away it was.

"I'll come with you," Sara announced now. "You don't need to drive out there all alone and it will go faster, if I help," she added and Catherine nodded, leaving Greg in no position to refuse Sara's offer.

---

In one point Sara's move had definitely been the right tactic. It had been clear that Greg would not be able to be silent for the whole, long drive, no matter how angry he was. He did not say anything until they were clear out of Vegas, but then he could not hold himself anymore and started to chat about some personal issues of minor importance and some things they still had to clear with the apartment they had together and it gave Sara the hope that Greg did not intend on breaking everything up directly.

When they finally neared their destination the only source of light that was directing them were the flashing lights of the patrol car in the darkness. They pulled up next to it and saw how an officer was just leading a hand-cuffed man to the back of the car while another one turned to them, directing them to a space where they could park their car conveniently near a small house next to the street. Greg turned off the engine and was about to get off, when Sara laid her hand on his.

"I just want to know," she started quietly, "if there's a chance that we'll be okay."

Greg leaned back in his seat again and Sara was holding her breath.

"Some time, maybe," Greg offered finally. He reached out to open the door on his side. "My life is connected too much to you… to us, to us together, as that I could just cut it off completely," he explained quietly, before he eventually opened the door and climbed out, Sara following him after some seconds of composing herself.

"The coroner was already here an hour ago," she heard one of the police officers telling them, sounding impatient. "DB's inside, the guy who did it was already taken into custody," the man continued, pointing vaguely into the direction of the patrol car. "Not much left for you," he added shrugging.

Greg nodded without commenting on the underlying insolence. He and Sara made their way silently into the house.

"You didn't need to come. I could've worked the scene alone," he said finally.

"You would've needed the whole night alone," Sara replied matter-of-factly. "And I have to make something up," she added quietly.

The house was not larger in the inside than it looked from the outside, and apparently uninhabited. The body was lying near the entrance and Greg was briefly contemplating how they best divided the work, when Sara already marched into the direction of the neighboring room.

"I'll take this room," she said, smiling faintly, an expression Greg returned. Sara walked off and Greg smiled to himself. He had meant what he had said. They would be alright… someday. It pained him what she had done and he doubted that their relationship would ever be again what it had been before, or at least that it would be like that quickly, but he knew too well that he could not let it go, that he could not break it off. One day they would be okay again. Somehow they would sort it out and they would be okay.

---

The moment the shots were sounding through the house and Sara cried out, Greg rushed into the room where she was working. He let his flashlight wander frantically and finally saw the man, who was armed with a gun, fleeing through the back door.

Not losing another thought to him, Greg turned to Sara, seeing her lying on the floor, the door of the closet next to her standing wide open, it probably being the place where the attacker had been hiding. Greg had kneeled down next to her, before he even noticed that he was moving. One glance told him that it was bad. He brought out his cell-phone, hectically typing the emergency number, at the same time talking to Sara soothingly. After a moment he realized frustrated that there was no reception. He threw his head back, unbelieving, desperate. Sara took his hand, squeezing it weakly and he looked down at her again.

"Greg…," she said and he jumped up, letting go of her hand, running out of the room, out of the house, determined to get help, but wondering where to turn to as the patrol car was long gone. Why did Sara have to come with him at all? She should not have been there.

When Greg entered the street, Sara's suffering had already stopped, her eyes had closed. Greg did not know that and ran along the street towards their parked car. He hoped for somebody to drive by, somebody who could go and get help, otherwise he would have to drive into the next town, leaving Sara behind.

Greg had not reached his car yet, when the squealing of tires sounded through the night when the car that was coming around the bend braked too late. Without really knowing what was happening Greg was thrown against the windshield, then fell from the hood of the finally standing car. He hit the hard ground and was able to lift his head for one final time.

It was an uncanny repetition of the scene Sara was seeing in the moments after the lab explosion, how Greg was lying there, before he let his head drop, not able to stay conscious any longer, just like Sara had seen him falling unconscious in the burning lab. Only back then, he woke up again.

The End