Something a little different.

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach and am making no profit from this story.

Bedside Manner

By Nessie

He is considered to be a rose among thorns in the ranks of Shinigami. He uses his sword with a grace unmatched by any other, and he lives his life with a deeper meaning that no one else can claim to possess. The difference lies in that no one knows what precisely that meaning is, deep or shallow. Does Byakuya himself even know the purpose of his existence?

It cannot be obedience. He broke the rules. He gave in to feelings he was told to ignore, to deny, to destroy. Love is not for Noblemen. Love is for the weak who believe that they cannot live without it. And Byakuya understands that he must have weakened a little.

Princess Shihouin Yoruichi, his childhood playmate, ran away with 12th Division Captain Urahara Kisuke. Fifty years later, 6th Division Captain Kuchiki Byakuya married a practically nameless woman from Rukongai. The Soul Society scandal of the decade.

Byakuya ignored the whispers, denied his parents' scorn, and threatened to destroy anyone who said a word against his wife. He was the bane of his family's honor, as he was its sole heir. Kuchikis do not live for passion. And in truth, neither does Byakuya, even now.

But he has a woman in his home that opens something within him, and like a well overflowing, Byakuya has an inexplicable urge to give her everything. His pampered, sword-sturdy hands washed the dirt from her face and took the rags from her body, replacing them with powder and silk. And still he wishes for her to look at him in the way he constantly fears he looks at her.

But then Hisana falls ill.

And Byakuya can do nothing but stand perfectly straight. The luxury of emotion is not available to him. He is a Shinigami Captain, he is the head of the Kuchiki family, and he is a childless husband. Now is the time for him to be strong, something he has put off once already.

He is like a tree, but she is a river that surrounds him and seems to want to pull him down with her. All by himself, he tries to dam her so she will not flow away.

---

Unohana Retsu has done everything in her vast power for her, but she tells Byakuya with a kind look and gentle words that his wife is beyond medical miracles. "Nothing will save her." There is an intensity in her always-serene eyes that Byakuya should acknowledge and doesn't.

These words do not fully reach his brain, and Byakuya's only response is a terse word of thanks just before walking past her, heading for his wife's private rooms. Unohana makes no move but says only his name.

"Kuchiki-kun."

He stops only out of the respect she demands and because of the timbre in her voice. She wants him to understand, but Byakuya already does. There is something pulling at his insides, an urge to get away from the ever-right and reasonable doctor, but his chain labeled honor holds him in place. "You don't have to repeat yourself," he tells her. There is a certain gruffness in his tone brought on by the edge her conclusions has set him upon.

"She has a day, perhaps less. Perhaps only hours." She can feel him flinch without moving a muscle. "You have done all that you could. What she needs now," murmurs Unohana quietly, "is the man who cast off his mantle of duty in order to marry her. I do not believe that Hisana-kun ever wanted the captain of the 6th Division."

Such a small revelation has him briefly rooted to the spot he stands in, but after a moment's recovery, he progresses down the mansion corridor, silently dismissing his fellow captain from his home. He does not bother to wonder whether or not Unohana will leave immediately.

With a couple of Flash Steps, bright discs shining against dark corners on the walls, he is at his wife's bedroom door. He pauses with his fingers around the bronze handle, thinking about what he might find. He knows it shall not be any different than the way he left her this morning; lying on a futon with effortful breathing and cold hands.

Something similar to fear zigzags up his spine, icy adrenaline fills his veins, but he forces himself to relax and assume his usual calm. The sun is glowing outside, white clouds journey the sky, a clock is keeping the time dutifully…

And Kuchiki Hisana, the only person Byakuya has cared about without any prior thought, is awaiting her end just beyond this panel of wood that he currents hides behind.

How foolish is the title of Shinigami, he thinks bitterly. Can one be a god of death and still be forced to endure its harshness? Never before has Byakuya experienced such feelings of helplessness, of utter failing. A man so used to success being in the palm of his hand now holds nothing but a too-mortal feeling of loss.

He hurriedly reminds himself that his wife is not gone yet, and without another thought, Byakuya lowers the handle and enters Hisana's chamber.

She has seemed always too small for this house. It is the first thing that enters the noble lord's mind upon seeing her there, frail and easy to harm upon the futon. And yet, there have been times when the enormous House of Kuchiki has seemed too small for her. Her spirit outsized any room, any dwelling, and there were times even Byakuya had felt undermined in her presence.

He moved closer, walking around to kneel between her and the large window that allowed the room to be brightened by the outside world. Her eyes were closed, the ebony of her hair splayed against the white mattress the same way his black sleeves were set off on the white of his captain's uniform. Her flesh was pale, and now small droplets of sweat beaded her forehead, plastering her bangs to her skin. He reached out to brush them to the side.

Byakuya admired this woman whom he had defied expectation in order to be with. He had shared hardly more than four years with her, and now this. She was truly little more than a girl that, with time, would have grown to be a sparkling Noblewoman. She would have been the jewel of Soul Society, he believes. Everyone could love her, if they had the opportunity. And he had intended to give them that opportunity, if only—

"Byakuya-sama…"

His name is a whisper upon her dry lips, and he wonders for a moment if Hisana only dreaming, but then her eyes open. As always, he is completely entranced by the liquid violet-blue world within her gaze, and something clenches in his chest at the notion that he might never see so perfect a place ever again.

A small smile graces her oval face, and he notices the strain behind it, and desperately wishes it away in the silence between them. She ends the quiet with a short cough, and raises her eyes to his.

"I am dying," she murmurs. There is an exhale that accompanies the words, and she speaks as though she it letting go of everything around her. Her chest rises as she breathes in again, and Byakuya's hands ball into fists on his lap.

"You?" His mouth is straight as he speaks, and he holds back a direct frown. "You are the girl I found fighting attackers in an alley in Rukongai."

"And you are the man who saved me." She nods, remembering the night. "With your beautiful steel cherry blossoms."

Byakuya wanted to shake his head. Hisana had always so admired his zanpakutou, regarding it with almost worshipping whenever she spoke of his technique. But she had never spoken of him that way. "You lived on your own for many year. I think even if I had not come, you would have survived."

The smile suddenly fell from her face, and she stared at the ceiling over her head. Byakuya worried that she was in pain and was about to ask after her, when she said:

"If I had done differently, I would not have been alone."

And she told him of her sister. She spoke of the abandoned baby girl as though Hisana dreaded her, and yet she so desperately begged Byakuya to find her and accept her into his family that he knew she truly adored the lost child, wherever she was.

He took her hand, loving its smallness, loving how it held his even in her weakened state. As husband and wife, they had shared more intimate touches, but he now felt closer to her than ever before. He swore to himself that everything she desired for would be done, no matter how long it took.

"I'm sorry," she told him, tears glimmering in her eyes like stars that could fall at any moment. "I wish I could have returned your love…Byakuya-sama…"

Kuchiki Byakuya did not have the best bedside manner. He did not know how to cheer her except by telling her that he would do as she asked, and perhaps that was all that was needed. She had known how he loved her. It hurt his heart like the slash of a sword, but he only squeezed her hand until night fell upon the two of them, and the last ounces of strength forever left her little body.

Byakuya had defied the laws, bringing shame to himself and his family, and he knew without a doubt that he would do it again. For this woman who had apologized for not loving him that way he might have wanted, he would reverse constellations and burn the moon.

And yet all Hisana wanted was for him to take of her sister. And though it may be selfish, Byakuya would rather have his wife who did not love him over a sister who might.

Yes. His bedside manner was not the best.

But it was the most Byakuya had ever given anyone.

The End