Epilogue

Perhaps the world had not quite stopped spinning, because everything from then on happened in a blur, with Yuuri having no concept of how much time had passed.

He knew that Gisela had come into the room at some point, checking his forehead, eyes, general body sensations...

He knew that Wolfram had stood over him, calling him a wimp under his breath but unable to keep a smile from his face.

He knew that Gwendal had come in, not saying much but taking a stuffed toy he hadn't noticed and sitting it back upright from where it had fallen.

"You made it? Its a really cute teddy-bear!"

"Its a cat."

"Oh."

But when Gwendal walked out again, he wasn't frowning.

He knew that Gunter had come in. Or rather, rushed in - more like a white tornado than an actual person. Gunter crept around the bedside with exaggerated softness and shushed everyone (while somehow making the most noise himself), as if someone talking too loudly might instantly make Yuuri ill again.

He knew, most of all, that Conrad did not leave the room while all this activity was going on seemingly at once. Sometimes Conrad was reading (although Yuuri did notice that his eyes didn't move across the page all that much), and sometimes he stared out the window, to all appearances lost in his own thoughts. But more often he just sat, smiling gently in his usual expression, sometimes adding in a quiet comment of his own to the conversation.

It was another day before Yuuri was actually allowed out of bed. Strictly speaking he wasn't really aloud out at all until the following day, but by the evening he couldn't take anymore inactivity. Energetic by nature, he craved fresh air and at least the feeling of walking. This time it was Wolfram who was asleep in the chair next to the bed. The blonde had refused to leave, and nobody had really wanted to argue the point. Yuuri crept from the room without too much trouble, and made his way to one of the various castle balconies.

His legs felt steady enough, and he was sure the air was good for him - he felt strength return with each breath, and although the night was cold, he welcomed the sensation.

By the time he got to his destination and saw Conrad already standing there, it was too late to go back. Conrad must have heard his footsteps, light as they were against the stone.

"Should you be up?"

He hadn't turned around, but Yuuri felt himself flush a little anyway. Once again, caught doing something he shouldn't. And in his pajamas none the less.

"Uh... well, I just wanted the fresh air. I'm sure it won't do any harm, and I'm feeling fine-"

His legs chose that moment to give way on him. It didn't help the embarrassment much, but Yuuri had to admit it felt nice being caught by Conrad... there was a rushed sense of deja vu, but it was gone before Yuuri could place it. Enough that Conrad's arms were warm before he had been steadied against the railing.

"You really should have brought a dressing gown", reproved Conrad gently, and Yuuri knew he wasn't angry.

"Oh, yeah, I didn't want to wake Wolfram up."

There was a companionable silence before a thought struck Yuuri.

"What are you doing up?" he asked. Conrad smiled.

"The same thing as you, I suppose. The air feels good. And the stars are quite beautiful from this balcony."

"Yeah."

Another silence.

"Uh, Conrad?"

"Yes?"

"Do you mind telling me... I mean, I have this feeling I dreamed, only I can't remember what of and I have all these other odd feelings and did I say anything in my sleep?" asked Yuuri in a rush. Conrad was quiet before answering.

"You did say a few things... I really don't remember what, though. I have a feeling there were Sand Bears mentioned some time. You did say more than that, but when I was there at least a lot of your sleep talking was incoherent."

"...Oh. I see."

"Is something bothering you, Yuuri?"

"No, not really. Just a feeling, that's all."

"Ah."

"... That is, feelings of dreams, you know. Only I can't remember anything much. I think I fell from somewhere."

"I believe lots of people have that type of dream. I used to dream about falling quite a lot when I was a child, I recall. And then again when... well, a few years after that. In any case, I hear its common enough. Was your dream a scary dream?"

Yuuri tried to think back, but all he got was the vague sensation of air rushing past him, a name he couldn't put with a face or voice, and strong arms-

"I guess so. I can't remember well at all... someone must have caught me. I don't remember anything at all after dreaming that, so I guess I must have woken up soon after."

"Do you know who caught you?"

"No. I wish I did, though, then I could thank them."

"For catching you in your dream?"

Yuuri laughed, unaccountably embarrassed again."Sounds weird, I know. But, you know, its almost like if they hadn't caught me I wouldn't have woken up. I know that might not be true, but it just feels... you know, like it could be."

"I see. Well, if you dreamed about it so vividly, perhaps this person already knows that you're grateful - even if it was only a dream. Because you create your own reality, I think."

"What? Who told you that?"

Conrad looked surprised at the sharp question.

"Someone very special to me. It was quite a while ago now."

"Oh." Yuuri shivered, and Conrad looked at him, instantly the concerned bodyguard.

"Would you like to go back inside, Your Majesty?"

"... Yeah. I think I will. And its Yuuri. You named me."

"I will walk you back then, Yuuri."

"You don't have to."

"I know. Bit I'd like to all the same."

Conrad left him at the bedroom door. "I can hear Wolfram's breathing - he's still asleep. If you go in quietly I don't think he'll wake."

"Yeah. Thank you, Conrad."

Conrad smiled a farewell, bowing slightly before he turned and walked away, back to his own rooms Yuuri supposed.

"Wimp..." Yuuri opened the door and heard the muttered word from Wolfram. As Conrad had guessed, Wolfram didn't wake up as Yuuri got back into bed. The walk must have tired him out, because he didn't remember closing his eyes.

It was the same place. Exactly the same... only, it wasn't. The cliff was still there, but hadn't he fallen? And yet, he stood at the peak again, only this time the ground felt a little more stable under his feet, and the sky was shot with blue. The sun was warm on his back - a real sun, with real warmth and real light. It felt good, relaxing.

"Didn't I let go?" he asked out loud, half-expecting an answer. None came, but he heard footsteps a moment later, and then a hand on his shoulder. The dream began to fade, like water washing it away. Yuuri was not alarmed; it happened very gradually, peacefully, so that piece by piece the world faded. The last thing he knew was the hand on his shoulder, strong and calm. He couldn't turn around. But he didn't have to.

"Thank you, Conrad."

End.